Pure Sea of Bitterness @mayb3itsnotadr3am - Tumblr Blog

Me: *scrolling through Tumblr while nursing baby*

Me: *clicks on audio post*

Baby: *stops eating, looks up at me very confused*

Baby: *slowly turns head to find strange sound*

andthwip-deactivated20220219

Natasha Romanoff, master of deception.

ba614-deactivated20160821

THIS IS A PICTURE THAT SOMEONE TOOK WHO WORKS ON AN OIL RIG IN TEXAS. HE WANTED TO GET A SHOT OF THE LIGHTNING THAT WAS FLASHING BY. HE WAS UNAWARE OF THE TORNADO UNTIL THE LIGHTNING ILLUMINATED IT. This has been called a one-in-a-million photo; taken south of Ft. Stockton, Texas.

the-mighty-birdy-deactivated202

Plains rlly be like that

My boyfriend thinks I'm crazy but...

Anyone else think Brad Paisley looks like he could be David Tennant's American cousin?

#brad paisley #david tennant

I can't sleep

I have a weird feeling something bad is going to happen. And if it was just me I would ignore it, but I'm worried about my baby. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if something happened to him because I wasn't awake to prevent it...

scumbagsblog

Story time because this was one of the most surreal experiences of my life and I need to talk about it

So when I was sixteen I worked in a Dairy Queen in a mall (which was as awful as it sounds) and during prom season we had people that’d walk around in prom attire to kill time before the dance started.

You also need to know that among those suits in boxes you can buy at Macy’s is a three-piece American flag suit. I’m not joking.

So imagine, if you will, six white guys who were fuck-you tall all walking around the mall in this exact suit and matching white cowboy hats. Hilarious in and of itself, my coworkers and I were all cackling.

BUT THEN

My mall also had these motorized animals you can ride, they were marketed towards kids but there’s no way they’re gonna say no to an adult willing to pay $14 to ride on an elephant for half an hour

So like ten minutes after we see them, all of them come

RIDING ALONG IN A FUCKING CONGA LINE

Just these six identical cowboys each on their own animal, each animal blaring it’s own rendition of B-I-N-G-O, and I basically nearly burst into tears.

I hope they went on to start their own boy band or something.

antique-scarecrow

the only acceptable usage of ‘Boys will be boys’

goth-aunt

I am screaming lmao also this reminds me of @rosewater1997

jayalaw

@kingofthewilderwest

lastoneout

I really do love that people have legitimately always just been people. Like how many angry breakup texts have their been that end with “Come get your stuff or I’m donating it to goodwill”? People never change.

flutejesus

oh I fucking love this kind of shit

g0thcats

i want to be a cat. jobless. educationless. useless. there to be pretty and soft

mayb3itsnotadr3am

I want to be a cat so I can knock things over on purpose and pretend to not understand you when you tell me not too... Also naps.

kaijuno

Daniel Radcliffe’s wife is from Flint and so sometimes he’s in town and you just kinda… see fuckin Harry Potter out n about. Saw him leaving Texas Roadhouse today and he nodded at my round rim glasses lol

Didn’t ask for a picture but my waitress friend did and he took a pic with the whole crew

kaijuno

Dan Radcliffe is Flint’s local cryptid

keepthemacramesecret

mszamil-deactivated20220204

When someone asks you where you see yourself in 5 years and you’re like buddy .. im just trying to make it to Friday

van-dyne

there are two types of dads

prokopetz

The thing I love about cats is that they’re basically born ready to throw down. There’s something strangely life-affirming about seeing a ball of fuzz that could fit in the palm of your hand with room to spare react to an unfamiliar creature literally a hundred times its size by going “I roll Intimidation”.