Alex

Hiiiii:3 ^^ IM AWSOME SAUCE TRUST

[meaninglessalex]

This is really stupid and pathetic I know but the reason why I even suggested a break up was because I wanted you to react like “nooo I love you” because I just wanted to make sure you even wanted to be in the relationship with me and I just wanted us to be closer but not being together is more awkward

If I keep trying will you get back with me Broo your the only one I wanna be with

[meaninglessalex]

Do you not like me is that the reason?

[meaninglessalex]

I wish you knew how much I miss you I’ve cried for 2 nights straight and whenever I’m in thought I tear up

[meaninglessalex]

i do like your presence and you

But you don’t you even said yourself you need to figure out your feelings you don’t even know how you feel about me

[meaninglessalex]

I always cry when I have to leave I’m leaving my mom and a family of warmth to go to a house of coldness and fight so hate it

[meaninglessalex]

okay this is your chance to tell me all the things we 'haven't talked about' because you 'felt pathetic'

I’m just seeing this now :0 I’m sorry

Um there was a reason why I said I didn’t talk about it like I talk to like my mom about it or my niece but that’s it only something’s

Like someone who’s name starts with d like if I didn’t ask to make videos with you, you like only had her on your account and you hang out with her more and you call her more and your more happy around her and your family likes her more and she’s just overall better than me

Also it’s just something stupid but would like to mention I like being praised and I like being like treated like a dog and blah blah blah I’m sure you could already tell

I also just suck at communicating like I think about you like all the time but I just feel pathetic reaching out

I can’t bring myself to say compliments either even if I think them

I believe your lying if you even tell me u slightly like me or my presence

Sometimes you over react and it scares me so I shut down and push you away

I also am a person to shut down than proceed to push everyone away there are like no exceptions like you for example like yk how you say “I hate when _______ does ______ it’s so annoying” and I say I do that and you say “you don’t count though” like I can’t do that for shut downs I’ve done it every since I was a kid I would just sit in silence and ignore everyone and I used to do it in school to the points they would have to call my mom everytime I did and the thing is she isn’t an exception either she just knew how to speak for me when I couldn’t which is way she is sorta an exception in a way she just knows how to handle the situation

I enjoy getting gifts from you but I feel pathetic I can’t really give anything in return so I try but I can’t really do I do try to though

I just belive there is nothing likable about me and you would be better off with someone else that doesn’t have the same issues as I do

There is more but I can’t remember when I do I’ll probably post about it

[meaninglessalex]

People are so annoying like bro you can’t be mad at me because I’m not fucking waiting for your lazy ass

[meaninglessalex]

“I brought you into this world I can take you out of it”

Don’t worry I can do that part for you.

[meaninglessalex]

Bro one time when a girl in my school after she found out I used to cut myself she said “oh I didn’t know because you don’t have any yk” she was talking about scars like im sorry I’m black and they don’t show up I’m sorry I don’t have too deep cuts I’m sorry I don’t have keloid scars like damn bro

[meaninglessalex]

Um.. sh warning

So I have fresh scars but I don’t want to put any bandages on them because I don’t want it to be more noticeable.. what do I do

[meaninglessalex]

Whenever the topic of me not having friends my dad says “who’s fault is that” HOW IS ITS MY FAULT I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DO EVERYTHING RIGHT IM THIS PERFECT QUIET NICE GIRL WITH NO FRIENDS I DONT KNOW WHAT I DO WRONG I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND I DONT UNDERSTAND

[meaninglessalex]

Bro I hate and love going to other peoples house I like going because o get away from my house but I hate it because I get to see how their family treats them

[meaninglessalex]

“They want trump behind bars not pedophiles” BRO HE IS ONE

[meaninglessalex]

I really hate eating with my dad and his gf I go down stairs just to have to listen to the stupid fucking shit they say on Fox News “they just want to get these aliens out of this country” your so fucking sick for saying that THEY ARRESTED A CORPSE an actual dead person a person that had killed for what bro for fucking what listening to the people on Fox News is so insufferable they sound like robots they sound like actual heartless people.

[meaninglessalex]

I hope to find someone that just naturally treats someone like a kid because it’s just their nature like head pats or saying “mamas” and stuff like that!

[meaninglessalex]

HE PISSES ME OFF SO MUCH BRO DOESNT LISTEN TO A WORD A SAY BUT GETS MAD AND UPSET THAT I DONT TALK TO HIM YOU PISS ME OFF

[meaninglessalex]

Last year I spent the whole year being the one without a group or partner

They would say partner up and all I would do is stay in my seat cause I knew I had no one and when I wouldn’t have anyone I would just ask the teacher to work alone and for the most part they said yes but if they said no I would be put with someone and then we wouldn’t even work together they would just talk to there friends like behind them than I would do all the work