M🦉

Thought I would never ever write a fic again but here we are🗣️

[megumig1azer]

Note: In the future I might write a fic with some similarities but different storylines. Depends on how creative I will get🫩

Summary: Promised to a man you despise, trapped within the Zenin clan, you find unexpected comfort in the shadows.

Content/Warning: Zenins and whatever comes with it, intimate description (not freaky), mentions of death, hurt/comfort

Megumi x f!reader

All your life, your fate had been written by other people. From the clothes you wore to the food you ate.

And now, it was no different.

They chose for you, again. A decision made behind your back, when you were only six years old.

The average age at which a child discovers their cursed technique.

What a shame it was that a woman had inherited the ancient technique of your family. A gift meant for a child they had always hoped would be a son. Now they hoped that son would be yours.

So they decided for you, again.

They decided you would marry Naoya Zenin. The son of the clan head. A man raised by people just as rotten as your own.

Living among them only proved that truth further.

There was still time until the wedding, but the Zenins were obsessed with “shaping you into the kind of woman a Zenin head’s wife has to be” as Naobito said. So you were forced to move into their residence. You were taught their traditions, their rules, their history and every expectation they planned to chain you with.

Besides that, Naoya himself never missed a chance to bother you about the marriage planning. Not because he cared for your thoughts. He simply enjoyed reminding you who you would officially belong to.

Today was one of those days.

He paraded you through rooms he planned to occupy, his words laced with crude suggestions and open disrespect.

You felt sick. The idea of marrying him made your stomach twist. Worse still was the knowledge that they expected you to bear his children.

From afar, Megumi watched.

He always blended in. He was quiet and unnoticed. As if he belonged to the shadows themselves. A fitting trait for someone with his technique.

But still waters ran deep, they say.

The hands that summoned the clan’s praised shikigami were the same hands that knew your body by heart.

Every curve, every mole, every fragile spot.

The cold eyes no one could read were the same ones watching you fall asleep at night.

The lips that spoke only when necessary were the same ones whispering his secrets to you.

Calling you things a promised woman should never hear.

Kissing you senseless, as if the ring meant nothing at all.

All of it happened without suspicion.

Because no one would ever believe that stoic Megumi, son of the disgraced Toji Zenin, could feel like this. Could want like this.

He was a loner and a fighter. Never a lover and certainly never someone who would steal another man’s future bride.

Or so they believed. But oh damn, they were so wrong.

It all started with his sense of justice.

He witnessed how they treated you. How they controlled your every step, every breath, every scrap of knowledge you were allowed to possess and kept you under their surveillance.

The Zenins were infamous for their cruelty toward women. But even then, anyone could see how much harsher they were with you. Expectations were a heavy chain.

You acted tough, but he saw through your facade.

He saw how uncomfortable you were, how afraid you got sometimes and how that good girl act made you sick to your stomach.

So he began to help you in secret and started to approach you. To give you, what they denied you.

Was it a book? It was suddenly hidden on your shelf.

Was it a snack? It got mysteriously under your pillow.

Was it something to write? Out of nowhere a notebook and pencils were between your folded clothes.

You were confused. Afraid.

Was it a test? Were cameras somewhere to confirm your loyalty and obedience?

Or was Naoya actually being nice to you? Naoya being kind was impossible. Delusional, even.

Perhaps a maid. Perhaps someone else. Whoever your silent savior was, you were grateful. They made life there bearable.

With time, Megumi grew bolder. At least with you.

Wherever you were, he was there and made sure he was seen.

Sometimes, when Naoya dragged you off to force you to do some activities with him, so you could see how powerful of a man your soon to be husband was, Megumi disturbed, claiming to need Naoya for errands or whatever Megumi, of all people, would need Naoya for.

Then, between hushed whispers, he would give you tips to get out of their radar without being noticed.

Left subtle notes in your room, you had luck to find, guiding you on how to earn their trust just enough to loosen the leash.

He guarded you in silence. Gave you safety in a place that reeked of danger.

Day by day you got even more attached to him and he to you.

Every time he passed you, he saw your appreciation. He saw, that you were doing better. He saw, that his efforts were useful, cause you made the best of it.

And when the Zenins started to trust you, the guards finally stopped watching your door at night and he began to appear.

Through windows. Through doors. Through shadows.

The first time he came, was the first time you got to see his face that close. Before, you thought his eyes were brown. That moment you realized how wrong you had been about this.

They were the deepest shade of blue you had ever seen. Framed by impossibly long lashes. Beautiful in a way that stole your breath.

He was perfect. Everything about him.

His messy hair, looking in every direction. His full lips, that seemed so kissable. The sharp line of his jaw, which perfectly matched to his visible Adam’s apple.

But more than that, he was attentive and thoughtful. A man for justice. A man with his heart in the right place. With his own morals and principles. He was protective and loving, with his own expressive way of showing it.

He was all actions and no words, but that came to change.

It began with normal conversation, turned into the deepest talks you had. He opened up, told you about his mother, sister and especially his father. You told him about your stepmother and your so called father, who made your life hell.

You both trusted each other. Shared whatever crossed through your minds, no regard of how unspectacular or painfully private it was.

Trust bloomed into something dangerous. Something that turned your conversations into meaningful confessions. Into loving statements, compliments and praises.

It was everything a promised woman and her future husband’s second cousin shouldn’t share.

But that didn’t stop you, in fact rules shattered.

Verbal turned into physical. He was the first to kiss you, to see skin no one ever saw, to touch you like no one did before. He was your first in every way and you were his.

You were the most worthy thing in his life and it killed him that everyone treated you as Naoya’s and not his. It killed him, that everyone waited for a day, Naoya would do all those things Megumi does to you.

He wanted to kill them. To get rid of everybody, that forced you into a life you despised.

And now, buried in your neck, he sucked long enough, before a mark could appear, attacking another spot of your throat. Knowing exactly when your skin would bruise.

Someday, he promised, he would be able to leave them over your neck and every part of your body you please.

Someday, everyone would know, that you were his and he was yours.

If that made him a traitor, a disgrace, a shame then so be it.

He wasn’t one of them.

His father wasn’t a Zenin anymore, he took his wife’s last name.

Megumi was and had always been a Fushiguro and one day he would make sure you were too.

It wasn’t a promise, it was a vow. A vow that certainly will become true.

[megumig1azer]

Note: I had a vision. While writing I noticed, I actually don’t have a vision😭 But I think it still turned out to be okay, despite it feels like a fever dream to me. Hope you enjoy!

Summary: Friends, feelings, misunderstandings and Megumi Fushiguro being emotionally constipated (as usual).

Content/Warnings: university-au, angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, light spice (nothing to worry about)

Wc: probably 5-6k

Megumi x f!reader

Your shift felt ridiculously long, and it only got worse when you saw him walk into the café with Hana at his side.

Your heartbeat spiked, sudden and uncomfortably intense, and a wave of sadness, maybe even jealousy washed over you before you could stop it.

Ever since Fushiguro had defended you from those delinquents back in high school, you hadn’t been able to shake your stupid crush.

Too bad you never told anyone about it.

Too bad Hana now had the biggest crush on him and wasn’t even trying to hide it.

You didn’t know how she had managed to get him to hang out with her, but there was no way they were dating. She would’ve told you and Miwa. No. She would’ve told the whole world.

Your throat tightened as you watched them approach the counter. You hoped your coworker would serve them, but he was busy, leaving you with no excuse.

So you inhaled, plastered a smile onto your face, and greeted them.

Hana gave you a suggestive look, one you knew was meant to the man beside her. Not in the mood, you skipped small talk and asked for their order, forcing kindness into your voice.

“The usual” said Hana with a bright smile “and you?” she turned to Megumi, who was distracted by his phone and replied “Yeah, me too”.

By “Me too” he meant Hanas order, since he wasn’t interested in being here at all but when you came back with a matcha latte in one hand and a black coffee, just the way he liked, in the other, he felt dumb for being fascinated.

It wasn’t the first time you had served him. Since the café was close to his university, he came here often to clear his head or study when he didn’t feel like going to the library.

It wasn’t impossible for you to remember his order, but this place was filled with regulars and still you managed to remember his usual.

That was strangely… cute?

Especially after he took his first sip and tasted the aroma, somehow only you managed to get on a plain black coffee.

Megumi had always seen you as thoughtful. Quiet, but deeply kind. He noticed things others didn’t.

Like the way you placed your hand under the table when someone ducked, so they wouldn’t hit their head. The way you never took a seat someone else had just left. The way you scanned a group while walking, making sure no one fell behind. The way you spent breaks in high school with the lonely kids, ignoring the comments thrown your way. The way you remembered small details about your friends just to surprise them later. They were small gestures. But they mattered.

He admired that about you, how caring you were without expecting anything in return.

That was why he had defended you back then. He would have beaten up those delinquents anyway, but seeing them mock you, the quiet girl who would rather bleed in silence than burden anyone, had triggered something deep inside him.

You smiled softly and wished them an “Enjoy” then walked away.

Something was off.

Your smile didn’t reach your eyes the way it usually did. The spark he had grown used to was missing.

It bothered him.

Why did it bother him?

At the end of the day you were just his classmate. Nothing more.

That’s at least what he told himself.

It’s not like he was in love with you, more like an interest. But it was nothing serious. Just there. Quiet and sealed. Nothing he wanted to give attention to.

And yet it made itself known in moments like this and man did that annoy him.

Too lost in his thoughts, he hadn’t realized he was staring until Hana nudged his shoulder.

Right. The assignment.

They were only here because Hana had been sick and insisted on working together in their free time. If it were up to him, they would have finished already, but Hana had demanded breaks and dragged him to the café, claiming she needed her “daily dose of fancy drinks” whatever that meant.

She was kind. Maybe flirty.

He wasn’t sure anymore, but he hoped he was just reading too much into it.

-

A few weeks passed.

Hana eventually explained why she had been spending time with Megumi. You should have felt relieved, but the unease lingered.

Especially when she started sending him Reels and TikToks per WhatsApp, since he didn’t have social media.

He did. He just didn’t tell her.

And it was embarrassing how often his screen time was filled with highlights of you posted by Hana.

Why was she even public?

The universe seemed determined to mess with him.

It got worse when the three of you were assigned another project together.

That was how you ended up in the library. Laptops open, books and snacks scattered across the table.

It went better, than you expected. Hana flirted here and there, but Megumi didn’t seem particularly charmed.

When Hana excused herself to go to the bathroom, you braced yourself for the most uncomfortable five minutes of your life.

Instead, Megumi spoke.

“You’re actually good at this” he said casually. “Are you interested in philosophy?”

Outwardly, he looked indifferent.

Inside, he was replaying his words over and over, cringing at himself for attempting conversation.

Surprised, you smiled faintly. “Yeah. I read a lot, actually”

Your heart raced, but you hoped he didn’t notice.

“What kind of books?” he asked.

And just like that, you were talking.

You discovered shared interests. He teased you gently when you admitted to reading fanfiction alongside non-fiction. You learned that he collected poems and noted lines that struck him as important.

It felt surreal. Megumi opening up like this.

He was impressed by himself, that he actually did approach you even though he didn’t plan on doing so.

And somehow, it felt easy with you.

Hana returned to see the two of you talking. It made sense, you were working. But she noticed the softness in Megumi’s expression. Subtle, but unmistakable.

It stung.

Why wasn’t it this easy with her?

She brushed the feeling aside and rejoined the table.

-

You clutched the book in your hands, hesitating.

Beyond Good and Evil - Nietzsche

Megumi had mentioned it once in one of your regularly happening conversations. Since then, the book had felt heavy on your shelf, like a secret you weren’t allowed to keep.

Giving it to him felt too intimate. Too desperate. You felt like such an awkward creep for that. Yeah, no, you should head back.

You turned to leave, then froze. Hana stood beside him.

Guilt crashed over you all at once. You knew Hana liked him. And despite that, you had wanted to grow closer to him.

That wasn’t right.

You couldn’t betray your morals for your feelings, even if it meant losing your chance with Megumi.

So you left.

Megumi noticed you disappearing and felt a knot twist in his chest.

He was right to worry.

From that day on, you were distant.

You avoided him. Conversations stayed strictly about assignments. You didn’t laugh anymore. Didn’t look at him the same way. It made him go crazy.

He missed you.

He missed the way you smiled. The way you rolled your eyes at his sarcasm, especially when he mocked your fan fic passion. The way your conversations drifted from books to politics to nothing at all.

He loved knowing a piece of your mind.

If it was possible, he would like to know all of you. To read you like a book and know every single word by heart.

And it hit him. He was falling for you.

He hadn’t noticed when it started. Not when he replayed highlights of you. Not when his eyes searched for you in every crowd and followed every movement of yours. Not when he remembered your words better than his own thoughts and every little detail he came across. Not when he stopped by the café to get a glimpse of you. Not when he smirked thinking about you. Not when when his heart did that thing every time you smiled and laughed and not when he had that constant urge to talk as long and meaningful as possible to you.

It crept up on him quietly. And now you were pulling away.

Hana noticed it too. Megumi never did realise but she did.

The way Megumi looked at you. Soft and intent. The way his eyes traced your every movement. The way he talked more than necessary when you were around. And now, how he always glanced at you with a hint of frustration.

And worst of all? You didn’t even tried.

She knew that, at that point, she had to give up on Megumi. It didn’t make any sense to continue, but her ego wouldn’t stop daring her.

So again, she tried.

She intentionally “forgot” her book, asking Megumi if she could look into his while batting her eyelashes.

Megumi agreed, and just as she was about to sit close to him, he handed her his book and sat down next to you instead.

She wasn’t the only one who was more than surprised. You didn’t see that one coming either.

You thought he might hate you after you had grown cold toward him, despite him opening up to you more than he ever did to the average person.

And now, of all options, he decided to sit next to you. You felt painfully self-conscious, worrying if your uneven breathing was loud enough for him to hear.

Megumi, on the other hand, felt a confidence he hadn’t felt in a long time. He was sick of you acting this way, so he decided to take matters into his own hands even if it meant stepping out of his comfort zone.

At first, nothing happened. Then his shoulder brushed lightly against yours. Your fingers touched as you both moved to turn the page, and for both of you it felt like your skin was burning.

Hana, who witnessed all of these silent moments, felt like she had to do something. Even if it felt wrong, she couldn’t stop herself from forming the sentence:

“So, Y/n, what do you think about that friend of Mechamaru who told Miwa he wants to go on a date with you?”

She thought that might turn Megumi off. Instead, he was hit with an unfamiliar feeling, his jaw tightening and fists clenching.

Too proud to look directly at you, he studied your face as best as he could from his peripheral vision.

Meanwhile, you felt completely overwhelmed. First, you had gotten closer to Megumi than you ever had in your life. Then you had to throw all of that away for the sake of your friendship. You suffered what felt like the most pathetic heartbreak in history, only for him to make things even more complicated with his sudden behavior, which sent your feelings spiraling. And now Hana was asking you that question while the man you were in love with sat right beside you.

“I don’t know, but I just realised I have a shift in a few minutes. I’m sorry, guys,” you said, choosing to flee and finally free your head from that exhausting rollercoaster.

Not long after, Megumi excused himself as well, leaving Hana alone.

As she was about to leave, she spotted a familiar notebook lying on the floor.

-

Megumi went to the café after your abrupt departure, only to find out that you had lied.

So he texted you: Meet me at the park in 30 minutes. I know you’re not at work.

Reading his message, you felt genuine panic. Not because he had caught you lying but because your notebook, filled with your thoughts, scribbles, and everything you had poured onto those pages about Megumi over the years, was gone.

You were doomed.

That couldn’t be a coincidence. This was it. He would reject you, and you would have to live with that embarrassment for the rest of your life and probably drown in pain for half of it.

When you reached the park, you saw Megumi… empty-handed? Now you were confused.

As you approached him, he got straight to the point “Why are you acting weird?”.

“What do you mean?” you asked.

“You’re avoiding me” he replied. His voice was dry, but his eyes carried hundreds of emotions.

He wasn’t in the mood for you playing oblivious. He needed answers. He was going crazy.

“I’m just a bit stressed about the upcoming exams, that’s all. Sorry if it seemed different” you lied again. It felt best to keep your true emotions hidden. You couldn’t make things more complicated than they already were. You were just tired.

“You’re lying” he said calmly. “You won’t look at me anymore. You leave every place where I am. Whenever I’m at the café, your coworker suddenly shows up after you whisper to him. I’m not oblivious, Y/n. You stopped talking to me like I mattered”

For a long time, words had never felt so heavy. You stopped talking to me like I mattered echoed relentlessly in your head.

Why did he have to sound like you weren’t the only one who felt that spark? Why did he have to mess with your mind while you were desperately trying to get your shit together?

At first, you thought he had the notebook. Now he clearly had no idea about your feelings or he was pretending not to and what he was saying sounded dangerously close to a confession.

“I-“ you didn’t know. What were you supposed to say? What was the right thing to do? You were so confused.

Megumi’s patience was slowly but surely fading. His heart raced after being that raw and honest.

It was just one small thing, but it felt heavy on his tongue, like it burned when he finally said it out loud.

“Y/n, say something. Anything. I’m losing my fucking mind. I’m going insane. First, you make me feel like you notice me, like you care, like what I say actually has value. Like I have value. Like I’m finally part of your world. Like I’m worth being included, the way everyone else is for you. You made me feel like I could open up. Like there was space for me and my thoughts and feelings in this world, just to shut me out from one day to the next. And now you’re trying to fool me into believing it’s just stress? What did I do wrong? Tell me, and I’ll fix it. Just don’t push me away. Not when it hurts this much to lose you.” Despite his effort to stay composed, his voice broke near the end.

You started trembling, fighting back tears. This wasn’t what you wanted. You never meant to hurt him. Hell, you didn’t even know it mattered to him. You thought you were just some random girl he had saved. Someone he barely acknowledged outside of assignments. And now he was laying all of this on you, as if you hadn’t been yearning since high school to mean something to him.

A thousand thoughts raced through your mind, your body flooded with adrenaline, and through tears you whispered, “Megumi, I can’t,” without even knowing what you were referring to.

Megumi felt like he was in crisis. He had said all of that, just to get nothing? Never in his life had he been this vulnerable. And when you turned to leave, panic took over and his instincts acted before his mind could stop him.

Fuck it. There was no way to be more vulnerable anyway.

He grabbed your cheeks, pulled you toward him, and crashed his lips against yours.

It wasn’t romantic. It was messy, desperate, filled with everything that had built up over the past few weeks.

Both of you felt unfamiliar sensations rushing through your bodies.

What started as an impulsive kiss turned into a full-blown make-out session, as if you were both trying to reach each other’s souls. He devoured your lips like his life depended on it, like you might slip from his grasp at any second.

And he wasn’t wrong. Even though you kissed him back just as desperately, an image of Hana flashed through your mind.

You pulled away abruptly. He chased your lips instinctively before you gently pushed him back.

Dazed, he stared at your swollen lips before lifting his gaze to your face, trying to understand what was happening.

What he didn’t expect were tears streaming down your cheeks.

You shook your head. “Megumi, we can’t. I can’t. Not like this. Not while—”

“Not while what?” he asked, irritation creeping into his voice.

“It’s Hana” you said quietly. “She likes you. She’s my friend. I can’t be the kind of person who gets what she wants by knowingly hurting someone else”

He stared at you coldly. “Then don’t”

Without another word, he turned and walked away.

He was hurt, no, shattered. He hated that you could just walk away. He hated that the reason you rejected him was to protect someone else, even though that was one of the things he loved most about you.

He understood you. Hell, if Itadori liked you, he would probably torture himself before daring to get close to you.

It still hurt.

Even knowing your reasons, he felt betrayed. Instead of choosing him, you chose to flee. To follow what you thought was right instead of fighting for what could have been.

You loved each other. And still, you didn’t.

If it hadn’t been for you leaving, he would have fought. But now? Now he didn’t know what was left to fight for.

You had made your decision. And it wasn’t him.

Then so be it.

-

Hana was furious. It wasn’t just the fact that you had harbored this long-time crush on Megumi without losing a single word about it or bothering to tell her, especially while she had been openly simping in front of you.

It was how deep it ran. How honest and genuine it was. This wasn’t just a crush. You loved him with every cell of your body.

It disturbed her. She hated it. What she hated even more was that she couldn’t deny the truth. It wasn’t just you, it was him too. He reciprocated. She had seen it with her own eyes. You were everything she wanted to be, and it made her so fucking angry.

So she waited for you to close the café and immediately grabbed your wrist, pulling you toward her car.

“Hana, what’s wrong? Why the hell are you pulling me?” you asked, but she ignored you.

Once inside the car, she stared silently out the front window.

It irritated you that she made such a dramatic move just to say nothing. You would have much preferred walking home with your headphones on, crying over your miserable life.

Still trying to collect yourself, you asked softly, “Is everything alright?”

At that moment, she grabbed something from the backseat, threw it onto your lap, and looked at you with an expression you had never seen before.

Looking down, you recognised your notebook.

Closing your eyes and taking a deep breath, you prepared yourself for one ugly conversation.

“You fucking lied to me. Every word of encouragement from you was a fucking lie. Do you know how stupid I feel? You watched me make a fool out of myself. Did you ever consider telling me? Or did you enjoy watching me openly flirt with a man who is fucking head over heels for you? Do you know how humiliating this is? Was I a joke to you? For what, huh? So you could later use me as some lame moral excuse to let him go? First you make me a clown, and then I’m the reason you don’t approach him?”

It broke her. It broke her how long this had been going on, how uncertain you were of yourself, and how you were always the one to put yourself last.

You didn’t choose him over her. You never chose yourself over anyone. And it made her sick, because she would never be that way. She always took what she wanted. She admired you, and it disgusted her at the same time.

You, on the other hand, just listened. Was she unfair to you? Of course. But you understood her. In some way, you had played with her feelings, even if it had never crossed your mind. So if she needed this, it was okay. You had messed things up. Maybe all of you had.

After an uncomfortable silence filled with Hana’s ragged breathing, she cut through it.

“You know, Megumi never looked at me the way he looks at you. I saw it. I saw how his features softened around you, how he would wait for me to leave just so he could talk to you. How he always searched for a way to be close to you, even if it meant just buying a coffee. But I ignored it. I wanted him. He wasn’t like the others, drooling over me with a snap of my fingers. At first, I didn’t think about it. But I came to realise he was already gone before I even started”

That might have been the moment Hana closed that chapter. She didn’t do it out of generosity or kindness. At the end of the day, she wasn’t you. She would never be you. She did it because there was no escaping the truth and she had to face it.

“I’m sorry, I-“ she stopped you with a raised hand. “I don’t want you to say anything. To be honest, I don’t want to hear you. I’m too mad to put up with this shit. Just… go to him. I’ll hate you if you waste this”

It hurt how indifferent she was toward you, how she didn’t even want to hear you out. But you didn’t want to fight.

Respecting her decision, you nodded and stepped out of her car.

-

Hana expected to see you and Megumi walking around campus hand in hand, as if the world belonged to just the two of you.

That day never came, though.

She waited for weeks, but nothing happened.

Instead, she noticed Megumi growing passive. He withdrew more than usual. He became colder, more uninterested, no longer himself. Just a robot going through his routine.

And you? You looked exhausted. Breaks you usually spent with her and Miwa turned into you disappearing and only returning for lessons.

Everything fell apart, and she had no explanation why. The doors were open. You loved him. He loved you. She had stepped aside. So what was the problem?

To find out, she told a worried Miwa everything. Miwa went to comfort you and came back with new information, about the confrontation between you and Megumi, and the fact that neither of you had dared to make a move afterward.

Now she understood.

Hana was no longer the obstacle. Megumi was.

One hardship had been enough for him to run away and accept your rejection.

At first, she tried to ignore it. It was none of her business. You both could suffer, and she wouldn’t care.

But then… she did. Damn it, she did.

She hated seeing you suffer over something you didn’t have to. She hated how Megumi hid behind his pride. And she hated how all of you acted like there was nothing to fix, as if this had been some peaceful separation.

Maybe she lost. But she wouldn’t accept watching both of you destroy yourselves. She wasn’t that heartless.

So one fateful day, she messaged Megumi to meet her in the janitor’s room.

If it hadn’t been for her serious tone, he would have ignored her. Maybe it had something to do with you. Even if he forced himself to believe you didn’t matter anymore, there was nothing in his life he had failed at more than losing you.

As soon as he closed the door behind him, Hana started ranting. No hello. No small talk.

“I shouldn’t be the one doing this shit, but since you have issues manning up and your so-called moral lover won’t do it, I’ll give you a reality check.”

Frowning, offended, he snapped, “What the hell are you talking about?”

“You really want to know? I’m talking about how your ass let her go because it was easier than fighting. She did that to avoid hurting me, and you still act like she chose me over you, like she was playing some game. You don’t realize she left because she wanted you so fucking badly, do you? She owns a whole-ass notebook filled with poems, scribbles, and entries about you like some pathetic little girl. And now you’re both acting like cowards because neither of you has the guts to stay and fix your problems. You’re the most stupid people I’ve ever met. I didn’t want to interfere, and I’m still beyond mad at her, but if you let her walk away because it’s easier for you, you don’t deserve her. Do whatever you want with that.”

She spat the words without taking a breath and left, abandoning him with thoughts and feelings that refused to leave him alone.

-

Megumi didn’t act right away. At first, he tried to avoid it for as long as possible, but his sleepless nights only grew worse.

He couldn’t get you out of his mind. At night, he stared at his dark ceiling and saw you. Heard your laugh. Heard your voice.

He hated being attached, but with you, he couldn’t help it. He missed you. He needed you. He wanted to feel you and your lips against his again. He wanted to share his cold bed with you, hold you in his arms, and get lost in your scent.

All he wanted was you.

And he finally admitted the truth.

He had been a scared coward, letting you go at the first inconvenience, accepting your excuses far too easily. He thought he was protecting himself, but he was just running.

Not anymore. He didn’t want to.

Thats how he ended up camping outside the café, waiting for you to close.

When you stepped out the back door, you saw him.

Just as you turned to go back inside, he noticed and stopped you.

“We need to talk” was all he said.

There was no way out. Despite your painfully fast heartbeat, you surrendered, leaning against the wall.

The silence was heavy. Too heavy. You refused to look at him, but you felt his burning gaze.

Gathering your courage, you finally looked at him.

He looked different. Dark circles under his eyes, slouched posture. Almost ashamed.

Not wanting to soften, you looked away again until he spoke.

“I was wrong for letting you go”.

You didn’t answer, waiting.

Sighing at your silence, he continued, “Even after you told me your reasons, I believed you chose to leave me. I didn’t fight because I was hurt, not because I didn’t care. I drowned in my own misery and blamed you for it”

You finally looked up.

You didn’t want to be angry. You knew he wasn’t evil, just hurt. But you couldn’t forget how cold he had been that day. How miserable he made you feel when the choice hadn’t been easy for you either. How guilty he made you feel every time you crossed paths.

Finding a bit of courage, he stepped closer, lifting your chin gently.

His touch was soft, as if you were porcelain.

On the verge of breaking, you whispered, “You don’t get to say this now”

He closed his eyes as if your words physically hurt. When he opened them, he cupped your cheeks, just like the day he kissed you.

“If you walk away again, I’ll follow. I don’t want to live as if there isn’t an ‘us.’ I won’t do that again. If I have to, I’ll travel to the end of the world to find a solution, but I won’t leave you, and I won’t let you leave me either”

As he spoke, he moved closer until his chest pressed against yours. You felt his racing heart, just as he felt yours.

You fought to keep your composure, but his closeness made it hard.

Slowly, his eyes drifted to your lips. And even though your pride resisted, your heart had already surrendered.

He lowered his head, searching your face for resistance. There was none.

So he kissed you, taking what he had dreamed about for so long.

At first, you barely responded, clinging to your pride. But it didn’t last once his hand tangled in your hair, deepening the kiss.

You gave in, hands sliding to his back, his neck, his hair.

He slipped his tongue in, tasting you fully, making your knees weak.

Pulling back for air, he whispered, “I won’t let anyone take you away from me anymore. Not even myself” before kissing you again, this time like a promise.

It was slow and sweet, romantic and full of love. He took his time, biting your lower lip, soothing it with his tongue, changing angles carefully.

When he finally pulled away, he buried his face in your neck, arms wrapped around your waist.

“I’ll make you happy the way you deserve” he murmured, lips grazing your skin.

[megumig1azer]

Summary: Megumi and you, childhood friends, holding each other through every tear.

Content/Warnings: season 2 spoilers, mentions of death, panic attack, soft angst, hurt/comfort

Megumi x f!reader

February 2009

„Megumi“

„No“

„Megumi“

„No“

„Me-“

„I‘m gonna cut your stupid donkey‘s throat if you don’t shut up”

That was it. That was enough to break your precious five-year-old heart, threatening to kill your favorite stuffed animal.

You hadn’t thought that bothering Megumi about playing together with your Littlest Pet Shops would end with tears rolling down your face.

At that moment, Megumi realised he had fucked up.

He hadn’t meant to be that harsh on you, it was just that everything had been a lot these past few months. He was just a six-year-old who had randomly ended up with that freak Gojo, who occasionally urged him and Tsumiki to Jujutsu High so they could “get the vibe for the future,” as Gojo said.

Unfortunately, today Tsumiki couldn’t make it because she was on a trip with her class.

That left only him as your victim.

Nanami was your benefactor. Megumi wasn’t even sure why, he just remembered hearing something about a massacre and your family being dead. He didn’t know what role Nanami played in this, nor did he care.

What he did care about, though, was that you were crying. Especially because of him.

Overwhelmed, Megumi panicked, trying to figure out what he could do to make you stop

You were about to leave the room, one hand holding your donkey Doni tight to your chest and the other wiping your tears, until Megumi grabbed your shoulder.

“I’m… I’m sorry okay? That was mean of me”.

Hopeful, you turned around with those damn teary innocent eyes, reminding him that you were just a kid like he was. Maybe he no longer carried that childish spark himself. Too early, too exhausted, and traumatised from life but you did. No matter how tragic your life was. He had no right to take that away from you.

“You’re really sorry?” you questioned, and he nodded. Pouting, you told him to apologize to Doni too. Cringing at your request, he considered breaking your heart again but he couldn’t. Not when his chest tightened as he saw you in that state.

So he ignored every cell in his body screaming out of embarrassment and muttered an absolutely dry, “Sorry”.

Despite his lame apology, you knew it was probably one of the most painful things he’d ever done. Full of appreciation and forgiveness, you threw yourself into him and hugged him, whispering, “Thank you.”

Megumi hesitated for a moment, but gave in, hugging you back.

That day, Megumi realized one thing. He hated seeing you cry.

January 2017

You were crying. Again. In his arms. This time it was because of your stupid boyfriend, well ex-boyfriend, who used you to get to your best friend.

To him, it was ridiculous. He told you it didn’t make sense to him that you had a boyfriend at thirteen, and he didn’t get how a fourteen-year-old could plot such a cruel plan. Still, none of that mattered when you were suffering and needed his support. Also, that jerk surely got his lesson after getting bludgeoned, but you didn’t need to know that.

He didn’t say much, knowing he would just make things worse, being far too rational and honest. So instead, he caressed your back, tracing patterns here and there. And to get that kind of affection from Megumi meant a lot. Still, it wouldn’t stop him from threatening you for losing any word to Gojo.

Sometimes he wondered how you were so fragile. At the end of the day, Nanami was the one who took care of you. He had quit being a Jujutsu sorcerer, claiming they sucked, and begun a career as a businessman, turning into a stoic, determined man but apparently, that didn’t pass on to you.

Even Shoko would joke about it “You know, sometimes I think Y/n and Fushiguro should’ve swapped benefactors. Y/n’s way too Gojo-coded, and Megumi’s basically Nanami’s copy”.

Which wasn’t really wrong. You were always ready to join Gojos antics, while Nanami and Megumi would just scowl at you both. But he wouldn’t wrong you. You were far from as crazed as Gojo was, that’s for sure.

You snuggled yourself further into his chest, dampening his shirt even more if that was possible, closed your eyes, and whispered through quivering lips, “At least you’re by my side, Gumi. That’s enough and… will always be”, getting quieter at the end.

That made Megumi freeze for a second. You weren’t aware, but those words landed heavy on him. It was nice knowing how much he meant to you, because he knew how much you meant to him.

His arm around you tightened, while he hid his face in your hair, subtly inhaling your scent, as if he needed to prove to himself that you were here, in his arms. He whispered back, “I will never leave your side. I promise”.

He made that promise despite being aware of the dangers of being a sorcerer. Still, he meant every bit of it. He would fight and try no matter how hard and impossible it seemed. He knew you would too. He knew you were one of the few people who wouldn’t leave him. His parents did, but he knew you wouldn’t.

April 2017

You were crying. Again. Though this time, you were the one offering comfort, because you weren’t crying alone. Megumi did too. Messy, sobbing, trembling. A one-time sight only you got to see. Tsumiki had been cursed and fallen into some kind of coma. Several professionals tried to help but failed. A few were still on their way from abroad.

Megumi was more than devastated. He wasn’t just grieving, he was drowning in guilt and regret. For every rude and disrespectful thing he’d said to her, just because he couldn’t stand how good she was. He felt lost. He shared his life, his trauma, his everything with her. She was everything to him and and now she glided out of his hands.

He already missed her warm smile, that always reached her eyes and the way her voice hardened, but still held a strange kind of softness as she scolded him for some dumb thing he did again. He missed her.

Another embarrassingly loud sob broke out of his mouth, but he couldn’t help it. So he clung tighter to you, despite weakness in his limbs, feeling like you were the only thing anchoring him right now.

You stroked soothingly through his hair, trying your best to collect yourself. He needed you, and you wouldn’t let him down. So you whispered reassuring, hopeful things. Neither of you were sure how true they would come out in the future, but there wasn’t much left except hope.

Hearing his breath turn more frantic than before, you urged him to sit upright, held his trembling hands, and gently guided him to steady his breathing.

Megumi felt how his muscles contracted and he couldn’t move. So he put maximum effort into concentrating on your voice and following your instructions.

Slowly, he regained control of several body parts, till his panic attack faded entirely.

“Fell better?” you asked, and he just nodded, utterly exhausted. “Just… hold me, please”, was the last thing he said that night, before you ended up on your back with his head resting in the crook of your neck, while one hand caressed the hair at his nape and the other his back.

November 2018

You both were crying. Again. Just the two of you in your dorm, where no one could possibly witness your intimate moment.

Nanami had been killed, Gojo sealed, Nobara’s chances of living were low, Sukuna destroyed Shibuya and took hundreds of lives and what not.

Now that other patch up freak started his fucked up game and you newly made it to Jujutsu High.

Everything happened so fast, so cruel.

You two weren’t even entirely processing what had happened. Not even grieving properly. Just a few tears slipped. Both of you were exhausted from feeling anything that wasn’t the warmth you gave each other.

There wasn’t time to mourn. Megumi and you had to go on, continue fighting and trying to fix that messed up shit at your young age, which was never meant to be lived like a normal teenager anyway.

But neither you nor Megumi were ready to continue before engraving each other’s presence into your memory, before enjoying and appreciating that you were both alive, side by side.

At that point you were the only constant in his life, and he was the only constant in yours.

That day, Megumi was even more determined than ever to keep his promise. He wouldn’t leave your side. No matter what.

He wanted to kiss you, to seal his promise between your lips.

But there wasn’t room for those feelings. Maybe one day. Maybe someday, when this fucked-up world ended. Maybe someday, when the both of you actually got to live a life far away from any cruelty, any curses, any demons plotting to feed their egos or execute their plans.

Yeah, that would be nice. Even if it sounded impossible.

For now, the only thing he had was hope and you. That would be enough. You would be enough.

July 2029

You both cried. Again. But today you had company. Today you both cried with Nozomi, your newborn son. Nozomi meant hope and was the evidence that everything could turn out fine, as long as the two of you were side by side.

Never once did either of you falter, even though things had seemed hopeless. Megumi held his promise, and he would surely continue to do so in the future. But if death forced him otherwise, Nozomi would always be a part of him, at your side.

[megumig1azer]

Note: This is my first fic in English, the first one I’ve written in years and the first one to publish on Tumblr so please bear with me. Chat helped me proofread because I suck at tenses😭.

Summary: After one too many visits to the infirmary, Megumi is forced to confront the fact that he deserves more than just survival.

Content: fluff, hurt/comfort, aged-up characters (not that deep actually)

Megumi x f!reader

Feeling the weight beneath your eyes, you were certain this was your cue to call it a day and finally meet your beloved bed.

Too bad fate had other plans. And by fate, you meant Megumi Fushiguro.

There he was. Blood trickling down his forehead, his stoic face covered in bruises and his uniform torn right below his ribs, revealing a concerning gash.

Taking in Megumi’s beaten-up state, you exhaled loudly and said, quite unimpressed,

“Again, Fushiguro? Isn’t this like your third visit this week alone?”

You hadn’t meant to sound rude, but it wasn’t easy to keep your composure while trying to suppress the fact that you cared.

Specifically, that you cared about him.

You couldn’t shake the feeling that this wasn’t just about getting hurt during missions anymore. It began to feel intentional, born from reckless decisions.

So of course you were pissed whenever you saw him several days a week, wearing his usual nonchalant demeanor, as if he didn’t look one forehead flick away from death.

His only response was a shrug before taking a seat.

Megumi was used to this. Risking his life, getting scolded, doing it anyway and getting scolded again.

It wasn’t as if the words of others would change his mind, especially his opinion on his own worth.

At the end of the day, he was a weapon.

That was his purpose. Saving others, even if it meant doing so in the most ridiculous situations.

With a sigh, you approached him, gently reaching your hand toward his gash and letting your reversed cursed energy flow. You were far from being as skilled as Shoko, but Fushiguro had definitely given you plenty of practice over the past few weeks.

Refusing to meet your eyes, Megumi lowered his gaze, watching your hand resting against his body instead.

He couldn’t help the strange pull in his chest. Something that definitely wasn’t your energy coursing through him.

Not long after meeting you, he had begun to feel differently about you. You were caring, loving, grounding. Someone who made sure to be a sanctuary for everyone. Something he desperately needed, yet would never admit.

You always carried this calmness about you, spreading the feeling that everything would fall into place eventually. That things would turn out just fine. You were everything he believed he couldn’t be.

But to you, Megumi was the moon offering its light in the depths of darkness. Never in your life had you met someone who cared so deeply and protected so fiercely in silence.

He never bragged about his good deeds. If it was possible, he would burry them somewhere no one could see. That was simply how sincere he was. How naturally he took this role upon himself, to the point where praise felt almost ridiculous to him. And yet, he was the same person who noticed, who appreciated and never forgot the smallest kindness someone showed him.

Megumi being so reserved, mysterious, and guarded had made it difficult for you to read him for a long time. But after countless analyses replaying in your head, you finally connected the dots and came to one conclusion, that Megumi didn’t feel deserving.

You were never entirely sure if your theory was correct, but you highly doubted you were wrong on this.

It simply made sense. Whenever someone said or did something kind for him, he either dismissed it or grew extremely flustered. Once, you brought him his favorite tea without him asking, and he reacted as if you had offered him your entire fortune and told him to let you die on the roadside. Meanwhile, he wouldn’t hesitate to sacrifice his own life just to save others.

Even though he was capable of shutting off his emotions and thinking rationally about what it meant to be a sorcerer, he couldn’t bear failing to save people he considered good. That was why he saved Yuji. That was why he would be ready to summon anything necessary to protect those people even if it cost him his own life.

Once you finished healing the gash, your hand moved to his forehead. Gently pushing his hair aside, you searched for the source of all the blood.

If Megumi hadn’t been so physically and mentally exhausted, he probably never would have allowed it. But in his weakened, affection-starved state, he couldn’t help leaning into your touch. Your soft fingers against his scalp were too tempting.

It was subtle but it was there and it was enough to make your heart stutter.

Seeing him vulnerable was rare, which made you cherish the moment deeply. It also made you brave enough to say

“You know… you’re deserving too, Fushiguro. If anyone is, it’s you”.

Furrowing, it might be the first time that night, that he really looked at you. “What are you talking about?” he murmured, searching your eyes for answers.

Meeting his skeptical gaze with a soft one, you continued, “You always refuse your own worth just to save others. But have you ever considered saving yourself first? If there’s anything I love about you, Fushiguro, it’s your selflessness but not when it means treating your life as a backup plan for someone else’s. You deserve to live, not just survive. You’re your own person. No one can take that away from you and you shouldn’t let anyone, not even yourself. You deserve to be wanted, appreciated, and especially loved. Don’t push that away. Not when there are people out there who truly see you… and are devastated watching you ignore that”.

With that, you turned away to gather supplies for his bruises, suddenly feeling too self-conscious after revealing how deeply you cared, after implying you were one of those people.

Meanwhile, Megumi’s heart pounded violently in his chest. Everything felt unreal.

He felt aware, exposed even. And the fact that it was you who had said all this only made it more overwhelming.

Your words echoed in his mind as he stared at your back, his expression unreadable.

It had been a long time since anyone had told him he was more than just a weapon. Maybe the last time had been Tsumiki. And that memory, so distant yet so present, had haunted him for weeks, affecting him even on missions.

He knew people cared. He knew Gojo and Itadori did. Hell, even Kugisaki.

But it was different when you said it. Not just because it was you, though he couldn’t deny he’d harbored feelings for you for a long time but because of the sincerity behind it. You didn’t just acknowledge him and move on. You saw him. You tried to understand him, to read through his walls.

To you, he wasn’t just another sorcerer, who happened to live at the dorms where your infirmary was located. He was Megumi. A person with his own value, desires, dreams, and most importantly, his own life.

Right then and there, something changed.

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt so free. Free from expectations, free to make a decision for himself. To finally follow what his heart had wanted for so long.

When you returned to him to tend to his bruises, your hand hovered near his face with a disinfected pad. Before you could continue, he gently grabbed your wrist and lowered it.

Puzzled you looked at him only to grow even more confused when you met his intense gaze.

You barely managed to say, “What’s wr—” before his hand slid to your neck, pulling you down as his lips pressed against yours.

Saying you were shocked would have been an understatement.

For Megumi, it felt out of character but he didn’t care. None of that mattered when you were here, telling him he was worth it. Worth love. Worth everything he had denied himself. You cared about him. And now it was his turn to show you how much he cared.

At first, you stood frozen, eyes wide, unable to respond. But before you could fully process what was happening, your body reacted on its own. You kissed him back, closing your eyes as your hands moved into his hair.

That was his cue. His other hand cupped your cheek as he brushed his tongue against your bottom lip, silently asking for permission.

Who were you to deny him? You parted your lips, and he eagerly deepened the kiss. Slow, gentle, your breaths mingling together. His hands wandered from your sides to your back, pulling you closer, urging you to sit on his lap.

Hesitant you obliged. Unsure of his sudden intimacy, yet too intoxicated by the moment to question it.

Out of breath, you were forced to break the kiss. Refusing to lose contact, Megumi rested his forehead against yours.

Your ragged breathing filled the silence until you whispered his name. His first name.

At that, Megumi let out a breathy laugh.

“Thank you,” he murmured. “For everything”.

Just as you were about to respond, his lips found yours again, cutting you off but you didn’t mind. Not when the kiss grew more passionate, more desperate, filled with all the longing and suffering he had bottled up for so long.

Maybe being selfish wasn’t such a bad thing after all.