laman ng isip(?)

Mga walang kwentang "thought" ni Mel Andy A. Co (Irrelevant thoughts of Mel Andy A. Co)

[mel-andy]

Why can’t I just be brave enough to face the consequence of my past actions. I’m living with the guilt of the past even if I know I already did my part. I am very anxious. I have no appetite to eat. My brain feels like it’s going to explode. My heart is beating non stop since Monday night. It’s already been more than a year and I thought I have already free myself from the all the negative. But thinking of it right now, it was just the beginning of a long lasting nightmare. The person whom I left with a lot of pain came back a few months ago and gave most of my days full on anxiety since then. Yesterday, I decided to tell him I wanted to move on and if he would decide to trespass my household and ruin the good bond I have with my parents with “his truth”, then let it be. But after all that, I thought it would give me peace or lessen the burden I am feeling right now. But no. I am getting worse. Ways to cut the string of life is starting to crawl into my mind. I’m doing my best to fight it. I just really want this to end. I just really want this to stop. I just really want to begin again without having to be anxious of the past going to ruin it. I just want to be free. 

[mel-andy]

It sucks to live in a world where the one who protects is the reason why we are in desperate need of protection.

[mel-andy]

THE CAPTION IS CRUCIAL

It will give you the meaning or just an idea of what your post is all about. Like for example this one. If those words weren't placed over those bodies. And let's say, the caption wasn't all about body positivity, these photos would end up getting harsh comments. But just to tell you, these photos did receive supportive and empowering comments. Even received more hearts than a thumbs up reaction.

So anyway, what am I trying to say? The reality is people are very selective. They support other people's opinions because a greater number of people were thinking it as well. A lot of people would say they are all for body positivity when there are nights where they laugh about memes of someone fat or someone who has acne. Some of them gets angry when they see someone bashed online for having a flawful body but laughs secretly when someone thin passes them by. There are even others who would share comments on posts like these showing their support. But when the post is a meme about someone emphasizing a flaw on their body, they would also comment something bad about it AND even tag their friend or FRIENDS to have more people see it and laugh about it.

If you truly are all for body positivity, you have to stop being selective on certain things. Be consistent with what you want to support and NOT support. Just because it's a meme, doesn't mean you don't have any right to ruin the humor by calling it out. Regardless if people call you a PUN ruiner(lol if that is even a word), still call out people who needs to be called out. It's almost 2021 and we don't need fake support.

P. S I am fully aware of how messy I write. I'm not a writer lol. I just express my thoughts.

[mel-andy]

Mali nga ba manalangin sa Dios na humaba pa ang buhay ng isang taong nahihirapan na? Magiging selfish ba ako kung gustuhin kong humaba pa ang buhay ng isang taong naghihirap sa sakit niya? O mas mabuti bang ipanalangin natin sa Panginoon na kunin na lang Niya ang mahal natin sa buhay upang hindi na sila mas mahirapan pa at matapos na ang kanilang paghihirap.

Ang hirap isipin na sa kagustuhan mo pang makasama ng matagal ang taong mahal mo, parang mas makakabuti na ipagdasal na lang sa Panginoon na kunin na lang sila para di na sila nahihirapan... Kahit ano man ipagdasal natin, alam na ng Panginoon kung ano mas makakabuti sa kanila at para sa atin. Ang mahalaga, naipaabot natin sa Kanya ang laman ng ating mga puso.

*foe today's pic, kuha ko noong 2018 sa may Mall of Asia.

[mel-andy]

Kapag ba namatay ka dahil sa isang maling desisyon mo, masasabi mo pa ba sa sarili mo na lesson learned? Siguro sa taong nasa paligid mo, oo. Pero sa sarili mo, siguro hindi na.

At least, may maisasalba akong buhay. Yung buhay ng tao na may plano din gawin yung desiyon ko. Ngayon alam niya na, nakakamatay ang ginawa ko.

Dahil wala akong mahanap na babagay sa post ko na to, eto na lang na kuha ko noong umakyat ako ng bundok. Ganda no? Pero di yan pumasa sa standarda ng isang website para sa stock photos.

[mel-andy]

Puso:

Mahal na mahal kita. Hinding hindi ko kaya na mawalay ulit sayo sa pangalawang pagkakataon. Handa ako sumama sayo at manatili sa tabi mo hanggang sa huling pag pikit ng aking mga mata. Lalayo tayo at gagawa tayo ng panibagong buhay magkasama. Ikaw at ako, hanggang sa dulo.

Isip:

Hindi ako pwede lumisan. May asawa at mga anak ako na kailangan ako. May pamilya na ako, at hindi ko sila pwedeng iwan. Mahal ko din sila at sila na ang aking prayoridad. Mali ito sa mata ng mga tao at higit na sa Panginoon. Mali na iwanan ko sila ere upang unahin ang sarili ko na alam kong marami akong masasaktan na mahal ko sa buhay.

"ang kwento ng dalawang tao. pinili sundin ng isa ang kaniyang isip habang pinanghawakan ng isa ang sigaw ng kaniyang puso."

[mel-andy]

2 weeks ago, I started eating foods high in fiber. Kaya eto picture ng breakfast ko this morning. Oatmeal with fruits, granola, chia seeds(nakakapayat daw), at 1 tbsp ng raspberry jam.

Ganda tignan no? Pwede pang Instagram. Kaya lang pag nakain mo na, nakakaumay. Sa bawat subo ko, mas lalo ko hinahanap yung mga mamantikang pagkain.