ask memes woo

[memesguilding]

pinned post for the pinned post gods

sometimes i really want a sentence meme to exist and it doesn't, and if you want something done right, you have to do it yourself. no queue, i just release memes into the wild when they're done cooking.

meme series:

nona the ninth

foundation (source)

westworld (future)

the last kingdom (future)

[memesguilding]

foundation quotes - 1.07, mysteries and martyrs onward we go. man this one was hard to pare down to a reasonable number. change pronouns and names as needed.

in other words, you abandoned your own people.

if we spread out and move with control, we should be invisible to them.

swallow your grief, [name]. we have no time for it now.

i'm not familiar with that term, motherless atrocity that i am.

i wonder what [name] would say if she were made aware of that.

it's not in my interest to publicize your true nature.

this was a staggering betrayal, [name].

as far as i understood it, you are incapable of disloyalty.

you know just how transformative the journey can be… and how the body will suffer.

all very noble deaths, i'm sure.

i can appreciate an aggressive early play.

we're misunderstanding each other here, [name].

i believe the dynasty will be the ruin of us all.

you don't even remotely comprehend what my familial line has accomplished.

you are the reverberations of a dead man's ego, by nature blind to all that you lack.

the soulless creature cannot recognize itself.

if that is truly what you believe, i am sorry. you will spend your life shouting into the void.

i'm not surprised it's left you confused. it's about something much greater than you.

not you, [name]. you're too dangerous unfettered. hold out your hands.

if we're unlucky, we suffer much longer deaths.

if she wants to invoke something greater than me, i'll do the same.

if they start pulling that thread, it all comes undone.

every moment of my life is a test.

you've lived every moment of your life with people watching you.

what have you done to yourself, [name]?

we're running out of time. we need to make a move. now.

do it, [name]. or we all die for nothing.

the empire won't have a chance to run, just like my people did not.

all of [place] will be nothing but a heap of poisonous ash, all its evils rendered silent underneath it.

we will deliver that justice to them, [name]. we will die to bring the empire to its knees.

gods are impervious to knives.

that's a fancy way of saying you lied.

he loved you. that wasn't a lie.

i am so tired of this, you deciding what i need to know when i need to know it.

you're too smart to play the victim, [name].

fine. we're both hypocrites.

i liked you better when you were dying.

i could feel it in the air. a… a sense of doom. i just… i had a feeling.

we're all different, [name]. and if you don't know what it is, i urge you to figure it out before someone else does and uses it against you.

i think i can feel the future.

[memesguilding]

foundation quotes - 1.06, death and the maiden ah yes, the episode that made me cry. or like... one of them. change pronouns and names as needed.

i didn't believe the stories until i met him.

the search for meaning is not always about the answer.

at every point in our lives, we have the power to choose our own path.

she's only just pulled herself out from the rubble.

ready to meet the clamoring masses?

i'm afraid whatever impurities i may harbor will have to remain hidden.

i don't think anyone with pure intentions would wheedle their way on to my welcoming committee.

you're alive because you're useful to us.

you're already dead. you just don't know it yet.

we're an army of ghosts.

what you've done is an act of war.

i shot one leg. your husband has another.

i thought you were trying to poison me.

foolish attempt to control the uncontrollable.

when i summon you, i expect you to arrive promptly.

consider it the rare opportunity for you to exercise your independence.

give me the day, and i'll mold that luck into skill.

you can save all that pillow talk for later.

what do you mean, we're not going back?

this is wild work, and i'm not having your blood on my hands.

i expected the clamoring masses upon my arrival, but instead i'm greeted by a heretic.

it is a sad occasion, but also a hopeful one.

it will not take much to tip things in a less desirable fashion.

and the food… oh, my god. the finest everything.

it was built on a mountain of lies and deception.

you know, i couldn't make heads or tails of anything he was saying.

we need to throw a very large wrench into the works.

you are definitely your mother's daughter.

he didn't touch me. he just talked.

there's only one scenario in which you leave as planned, and that's the one in which it becomes impossible for you to remain.

and we are here now, an entire galaxy pivoting around the actions of an individual. you.

open your fists, [name]. don't fight the wind.

you should see the view from up here.

that's my secret. and now you know it. now what do i do?

i don't care about the crisis. all i care about is making [name] pay.

even a soul that appeared holy four hundred years ago would not be holy today.

our lives in these bodies may be brief, but our souls are endless.

this will not always be your life, but it is your life now.

change it back. make her change it back!

if you fail to follow our orders, weigh your fate against those of your loved ones and act accordingly.

[memesguilding]

foundation quotes - 1.05, upon awakening shorter one because a lot of this episode was just gaal talking in math. change pronouns and names as needed.

[name] said there were lights in the windows last night.

you look like your father now.

so pious. hunting for heretics.

what do you deem it, [name]? you always had a sharp mind.

when a planet wants you dead, you die.

furthering knowledge is the most noble work of humankind.

all things have a cycle. after destruction, rebirth.

knowledge gives us ways to survive the destruction till the rebirth arrives.

i'm not on your side. i'm not a kindred soul.

it is ingenious, elegant and true.

hold your ground. they're just trying to rattle you.

she comes to destroy, no matter the cost.

[name]'s different. her game is over. no next move, only a last one.

you may have us outgunned, but you're desperate. scared. and desperate people make mistakes.

i'll be damned. they actually showed up.

i strongly advise you stay clear until we can determine why they want you here.

your daughter may be willing to defy the empire based on speculations, [name], but i am not.

the man loved you like a son.

did [name] put you up to it?

do you even understand what it is you've done?

i'm going to outsmart you, you stupid ship.

she has your mother.

shut up, or we'll both be orphans!

i understand what it is like to lose everything. to watch your whole life burn. i really do.

the empire took everything from me. and now we take everything from them.

because of what your prophet said, my whole world burned.

if you can see the sky, you are trespassing on his eminence's sovereign territory.

does it hurt any less? your brother, your family?

you know what, i thought i might feel empty. but i think it does hurt less.

[place] is [name]'s home. they think i killed him.

[memesguilding]

foundation quotes - 1.04, barbarians at the gate [begins chanting] phara keaen phara keaen phara keaen phara keaen ph [is dragged offstage]. change pronouns and names as needed.

belief is a powerful weapon.

empires govern worldly concerns, but what comes after?

faith is a sword forged in the fires of the infinite.

is it true? no one's allowed to touch you?

is she suicidal? who is this woman to question our primacy?

you should leave. before the empire catches wind of this.

my people do not fear the empire.

we've risked everything, [name].

they won't defend us. we need to do it ourselves.

violence is the last refuge of the incompetent.

calls herself [name]. beyond that, nothing about her story adds up.

i can't tell if she's lying or if she's just not telling the truth.

i'm giving you a chance to give better answers.

thought i smelled a whiff of [place] on you.

repeated luck is never luck.

there's a deadness inside her. she wants to die. she wants everyone to die.

what she said when she broke, did you understand any of it?

the businesses of empire is a cascade of competing priorities.

[name] is long dead. murdered by his protégé, no less.

thanks to you, we are now staring down the barrel of a genuine diplomatic crisis.

you have achieved elaborate suicide for us all.

your women are so much sharper than your men.

"barbarians." just a convenient slur for anyone not like you.

they left us all here to die. your people and mine. we're just dying at different speeds.

a weapon's only as good as the man who's wielding it.

my job is to eliminate problems.

i could do worse to you. much worse.

what is the likelihood that it's all true? every prophecy?

in the twilight of a man's life, when his biography is nearly complete, he grows desperate to know the measure of his days.

it's remarkable how self-reinforcing their results are.

our protocols have made us complacent.

do you remember what you said? i do. like it was yesterday.

i was scared, and i dared say so. well, i'm not scared anymore.

two worlds were incinerated with not a care to innocence or consequence.

you have bequeathed me an empire rent by impulsive action.

i would save our legacy.

you are haunted by the ghost of a man long dead.

you can't play chess with someone who's willing to set the board on fire.

done a lot of foolish things in my life, [name]. sticking by your side is not one of them.

remember my promise, [name]? razing your city to the ground?

[memesguilding]

foundation quotes - 1.03, the mathematician's ghost thirty episodes of this is gonna be a lot, huh. change pronouns and names as needed.

every world has ghosts, and every house is haunted by them.

i shouldn't take anything for granted.

i'm loyal to the empire.

will the empire be loyal to you?

you're becoming sentimental, verging on maudlin.

your continuity is assured.

how you spend this last day is up to you.

it will be a privilege to wear it at my ascension.

we have broken the barbarians, cast them adrift.

what would you have us say that you haven't said?

i wonder if there's a way to save it.

let us not destroy the last remnants of [name]'s dream for lack of our own.

no wonder the empire loves you so.

i find i cannot quite look on that child as an innocent.

even if [name] wasn't right, there is something unnatural in that.

are we not enough?

it's just that you always leave me.

to be alive is to know ghosts. we hear their whispers if we listen.

we are haunted by prophets, all.

we ignore the dead at our peril.

she's not distracted. she's aware.

[name], why have you got me out here at this time in the morning, huh?

no. do not make this sound like a cult.

some of us in our generation know what real religious fervor looks like.

and don't come begging for it like wayward puppies.

we're not begging. we're, um, trading.

that would be a tragic mishap.

it's got bugs the size of dogs and just as cuddly.

the sky looks like spilled coins.

is it possible to know you've got reasons and not know what they are?

no pants for the next twenty-five hours.

maybe it's a mistake. maybe they wandered off course.

we are a scientific outpost. we have nothing of value here.

under imperial edict, [place]] is off-limit to all of them.

we'll call the empire, and they will come.

generally i propose alcohol at a juncture like this.

i told you, different's not the same as special.

that is an ominous happenstance.

pay attention to the patterns and we can presage what comes next.

the ghosts of the dead haunt the skeletons that were once our homes.

[memesguilding]

foundation quotes - 1.02, preparing to live so much happens all the time in this show. change pronouns and names as needed.

all anyone has to do is look up to be reminded of our impotence.

i could destroy them still, even at a distance.

martyring dissidents is a risky enterprise.

we have time. a lot of time.

when will you stop taking me so seriously?

i could try, but i doubt i could find a more painful way to die.

there are always sympathizers.

never mastered the dialect. not like a native.

but it sounds perfect, doesn't it?

someone's going to hang for this. i'd like it to be the guilty one.

do i need to tell [name]? or is it enough just to tell you?

don't lie to me! it's okay for [name] to lie to me. i expect that, but not from you.

i know what the right thing to do is, [name]. i know.

he who shrouds himself from man's touch shrouds himself from god.

[name] dreams our future. what use would it be to guide our past?

shame grows in darkness.

i did my best to engineer the outcome.

you're afraid to tell him, and you don't want to talk about it.

it's close. i'm not saying it's not close, but not everything is solved.

i've managed not to die for a long while now.

you know i'm not the same as you.

the rest of your kind died.

they didn't die. they were destroyed by your kind.

millions dead, with a prophecy of trillions more.

they're still pulling bodies out of the wreckage.

you must admit it makes no sense.

someone is trying to destroy us.

this is the legacy. yours and ours.

we may scream it is not fair, and we would be right.

one of you is telling the truth.

we should let you all go free. we should. but we won't.

apparently, i'm better at predicting the future than i am at remembering the past.

i'm just afraid i don't know which mistakes are important.

[name]… with you… i want it all.

threaten the peace and pay a dear price.

our world will live on. you… will not.

tell the living and the dead you failed to save them.

i'll always be here, as i always have been.

how often does it end like this? how often do we choose this?

the weight of traditions protects us.

[memesguilding]

foundation quotes - 1.01, the emperor's peace time to make myself unwell reading through foundation transcripts! change pronouns and names as needed.

it's warning us to stay away. so stop tempting fate.

but to understand our future, we have to remember the past and the ones who caused it all.

all my life, i looked out and dreamed of being somewhere else.

i have to remember it perfectly.

if the empire is good for anything, they can damn well build.

i'm not going back. this is my home now.

words have a way of fanning into wildfires.

because when people are afraid to do their job right, they're certain to do it wrong.

not everything is a teachable moment.

barbarian kingdoms. they're more trouble than they're worth.

it's not the most important thing we'll do this week, but it's the most important thing they'll do in their lifetime.

their enmity is legendary, but war is expensive.

we were just marveling at the empire's benevolent reach.

no one else thought to use it. not in 500 years.

almost no one there thought like i thought.

i imagine you were lonely, a mind like yours in a place like that.

they're going to arrest me tomorrow. and you.

people lie, [name]. numbers don't.

you understand, these aren't things i'm anxious to tell people.

there's more at stake here than you can imagine, [name].

in the wrong hands, it's a weapon. in the right hands, deliverance.

art is simply politics' sweeter tongue.

the customs of [place] may seem idiosyncratic. but our attention to detail is how we maintain the peace.

and if the people step out of line, we hit them with a big stick.

the heretic and i will talk.

he will die as all men like him die, unseen by god.

a rotten tree trunk appears strong until the storm breaks it in two.

history is littered with charlatans and false messiahs.

we will, of course, be returning your gifts.

shall i speak first, or will you?

tell me why i shouldn't kill you and your followers right now.

well, that's a convenient data point for your side.

our dynasty has reigned for almost four centuries.

you offer nothing new. just a younger grape, from the same vine, destined for the same old bottle.

you can't save yourselves, but you can save your legacy.

[place]. i've never even heard of it.

i thought if i could make people listen, i could save them.

change is frightening, especially to those in power.

it's not the fall they're afraid of. it's the chance that your plan will actually succeed.

it takes more power to build than to burn.

[memesguilding]

nona the ninth quotes - day three, part three this one was long as hell, apparently day three is just quoteable like that, so i split it into parts. i fear day four. change pronouns and names as needed.

would you be mad if i died?

it's never good, with necromancers.

you are literally the only one who knows.

more people there were dead than alive.

was i fake? was i real? if i was real, what did it mean?

oh, you're the magical death man, can you do something about my body?

go, my child, your knee cartilage is fixed.

i had to eat, i had to sleep, even though i didn't want to.

he's curing cancer, that's great, but he's bookended by two zombies that they've dressed in outfits, that's bad.

the government isn't all, love that small business entrepreneur spirit. the government says, this is a cult.

that's not a defence force, that's a cop and six different kinds of nerd.

she chose us that day, not her career.

do something impressive to buy us time.

and then the government was like, okay, let's talk.

i mean, i had kind of done a huge crime.

there were extenuating circumstances.

it wasn't my fault that turning several hundred animals inside out makes you look like the bad guy.

it's all gone, i'm the only one left.

it's just me and you and no more jokes.

that's not going to be a place for children.

i don't want to see your bodies paraded through the streets.

you've got me by the balls here.

please never say that again.

they'd probably get shot by someone.

them all being so well-behaved was miserable in a way.

be sensible, [name].

he's got ageing kidneys.

i always keep my promises to [name]. this time i didn't promise.

[memesguilding]

nona the ninth quotes - day three, part two this one was long as hell, apparently day three is just quoteable like that, so i split it into parts. i fear day four. change pronouns and names as needed.

that is above your security clearance.

i am not trying to be cruel. you must see it from our point of view.

you know the ways in which i am sympathetic and in which i am not.

ah, in the end, all of us are people... who need the bathroom.

i do not want to run anymore.

[name] is what happens when nepotism and bullshit collide.

my hair is naturally big and manageable, dickhead!

you know i can help her, [name]. you know i want to.

so long as [name] doesn't tag along.

she's our ticket out of here.

come back to us - take vengeance for us.

is the compulsive shouting typical?

better friends to her than you have been glared at for less.

where am i? where's [name]?

i remember. i'm fine. i'm fine.

you're the one facing the dark night of the soul.

is this living, [name]?

you've never lived a single day of your life. it'd be against regulations.

you know, i really am glad you two are together... in whatever way you've managed.

i like my prison cells more obvious.

you're not a good woman, [name].

you and i don't even own our own souls.

my soul's mine. you give yours away to anyone who doesn't want you.

try to forgive me someday, [name].

you were part of the lie.

[name] didn't say anything when you came into the room. she only screamed.

i've got as much right to you as [name] does.

do you love love [name]? in-love-with-[name]?

maybe you could be the one to melt her icy heart.

you're cute... on your best days, adorable.

i love being told about myself.

you're mad at me. shame on you.

you shouldn't ask me things if you don't want me to tell the truth about them.

nobody's going to be interested in my lesson if they see you.

if [name] hears you said that, she'll be furious.

i have a ripple of evil running through my soul.

you darling, i know what you are, even if they refuse to see it.

i envy you more than anyone else in the universe.

[memesguilding]

nona the ninth quotes - day three, part one this one was long as hell, apparently day three is just quoteable like that, so i split it into parts. i fear day four. change pronouns and names as needed.

you've shown me before. show me again.

i can't do it by myself.

it's funny - i never feel like that in the dream.

it's not sexy, though.

since when do you use the word sexy?

we're having a heart-to-heart, i'm sharing deep personal thoughts, and you just want me to eat.

obviously a lot of terrible stuff had happened in the interim.

what were you and [name] talking about? sounded fruity.

i can be trusted to bring home groceries sometimes, you know.

you know you shouldn't have done that.

i don't think you've ever criticised me before.

are you kidding? i look like two elbows.

don't ask questions, [name].

she was keeping some pretty ferocious company.

you know it's okay to be mad at me, right?

some people were put into the universe to rig it to explode, then walk away.

that's a very interesting thing you just said, [name]. let me write that down.

cool it, [name], you know we'll do what you say.

i didn't take you for a traditionalist.

you sound like your sister.

i don't know you at all anymore.

it's good to see you, even if you don't feel the same.

we're not the hardliners. we want the same things you do.

let's get this over with. i had things to do today.

let us move on from playing game with how clever and old you are.

i am not impressed, and they annoy my colleague.

bet you've never been challenged before. how does it feel?

unofficially i am wildly delighted by this.

i have no time for worst-case scenarios.

[memesguilding]

nona the ninth quotes - day two speedrunning this book for quotes is hurting more than actually rereading it did. change pronouns and names as needed.

if you drop a sponge on me tomorrow i promise i won't scream about it.

none of my friends want to kill each other.

why does [name] hate you?

i like to think she doesn't hate me so much anymore... now that she's seen my famous charm, that is.

if you're that charming, how come you're single?

who, and whyfor, did you bribe?

you can't ever get the full data on souls.

so you think i trust myself too much.

i think that you can't be your own checks and balances.

sometimes you remind me of my mother.

domestic life is immensely depressing and has a lowering effect on the ego.

try to bring home something useful this time.

[name], this is hurting my dignity.

i am adjacent to being a doctor.

you don't have to go apeshit, [name].

we don't have secrets from each other.

i was out of my fucking mind scared.

you're dumb as a box of hair, [name].

there it all goes again. i can't stand it.

contract law doesn't set you up for rolling a couple bodies into a pond.

how we got through that i'll never know.

i could feel them - i could feel everyone in the building.

she wasn't scared i was nuts. she was scared i wasn't.

i wasn't trying to be a dick.

[memesguilding]

nona the ninth quotes - day one tamsyn muir i love you and i will never pressure you but if alecto the ninth doesn't come out soon i am going to explode. change pronouns and names as needed.

this time will be the time we get it right.

we just wanted to save you. you were so sick.

i still love you.

do you know who i am yet?

i never could help giving the girls what they wanted.

if they want her early, want can be their master.

she always made that mistake.

[name], this is sounding perilously like giving up.

this is [group] who don't give a fuck.

i wouldn't have called them too generous with fucks before.

[name]'s dead, and i don't give a fuck either.

you seem to have had... a big shock.

they wanted to see me naked. it was a sex thing.

you shouldn't always get whatever you want.

[name] isn't our friend right now.

i could never stop you from loving anything. i don't have the right.

so do i have the wrong kind of body, or the wrong kind of soul?

is there anything you're not telling me?

i trust them. they will not betray us.

i wanted to stop you hurting.

you're on amphetamines. you are on coke. you are on amphetamines and coke.

let's bloody face it, i'd gone weird.

[memesguilding]

unhinged shit my fiance has said yes, all of these things came out of my fiance's actual human mouth, except for the ones that were typed which came out of his actual human fingers. i love him very much. change pronouns and names as needed.

kidnapping! yay!

i have a date with frodo.

mmm, foot spice.

there are eight chicken vaginas. do better.

i'll arrange this marriage and then i'll cook.

how can any of us forget pikachu's killing spree of '98?

do you need sexually attractive bandicoots?

you gotta give the people what they want and sometimes what they want is arson.

i can't eat these, i've got a mouthful of balls.

all's fair in love, war, and bread.

he should still be alive! where is the shambling corpse of canute the great?!

oh no, he gave baby jesus brain damage!

you distracted me with the chunks.

this is my sweatpants mouth.

god is elmer fudd.

i think lego is having a seizure.

you deserve a fiery death in valhalla.

god is not all that elmer fudd encompasses.

i didn't want to think about muppet porn!

into the panini press with you.

bonus! unhinged shit i've said

you're like fistfighting an octopus.

punitive atheism it is!

that's way too much penis.