Dream Journal

If you come across this page, just know all I post are my most vivid, rememberable dreams.

[merakifreedom]

December 3rd, 2025

~Rebellion~

{ Dream Journal Entry #6 }

I had a dream that took place in the universe of Star Wars but no main characters were ever spoken of. I watched in the third person, as if seeing a movie and it started out with a young woman. She wore neutral colored clothing as you would see in Star Wars, with her hair pulled back into a pony tail and combat boots. The planet she lived on was forested with pine trees similar to the state of Washington or Oregon. On this planet, they were under the control of the Empire.

The woman’s name was June and she had been raised on this planet used to the heavy control of the Empire and its many rules. Yet part of her always felt that it was all wrong — that everyone deserved freedom to leave the planet and explore without consequence.

In this village, there was a leader — Bream. He stood tall, muscular, and did not smile much. He was like any good soldier who seemed void of emotions and stood his ground when giving orders. And June never seemed to get along with him quite well when he recently first arrived due to Empire orders.

On this particular day, June went out to gather crates from the back of a military style truck. She broke the rope from its clasp as her friend Sardie - a man she worked with for a while - came over to help. His smile always lit up the room even in times of frustration and darkness. So when he came over, and flashed his signature smile she felt her heart skip a beat for a moment.

“You work too hard Junie.” Sardie commented her nickname making June roll her eyes as she lifted the heavy crate and walked it over to one of the huts.

“Someone has to do it round her.” June laughed and set the crate down. They continued this bacj and forth conversation before Sardie stopped her last crate placing his hand on top keeping it in place suddenly becoming serious as he looked over his shoulder. He leaned close and whispered with a slight frown,

“Did you see the new guy?” He questioned.

“Is he still considered new? It’s been two months since his arrival.” June chuckles but Sardie shakes his head,

“No, no - something up Junie. I saw him speaking to another officer the other day. Something’s going on. They have been arresting more villagers at night.” He explains. They both hear boots crunching in the gravel behind them and quickly June lifts the crate.

“There’s nothing we can do.” June mumbles turning around just in time as Bream walks past them with his arms drawn behind his back. June tries not to look at Bream but curiously gets the best of her as for a quick moment she looks. Bream looks more tired than usual, his lips drawn into a frown as his dark hair curls wildly as if he had continuously ran his fingers through it. June swallows thickly before continuing her job.

As time goes on in this dream, of course I miss key points of how it leads up to certain events. But if I ever were to write a story using this dream - I would try to make it up and fill it in. But like all my dreams, it fast forwards - and though slightly confusing it continues as so:

June is now working with Sardie weeks later in an attempt to take back their village and planet from the rule of the Empire. Unlike before, several stormtroopers are posted around the surrounding area to ensure villagers stay and continue working by force. June is at the point now that they have been sneaking different weapons underground and readying for a rebellion and so far everything is working out as it should.

There is a particular day, my dream goes to where it is a very hot day. The sun is beaming in the sky and several people are feeling sick. Towards the east of the village is a large pond filled with clear water but when June asked Bream if they could swim - he declined.

“You let them control the water now?” June hisses glaring up at Bream who keeps his voice hard, his jaw clenched. He says nothing and June scoffs, “And what would happen if we decided to go against such orders?”

“Naturally there will be consequences.” Bream says glaring down at her. She glares back, brown eyes meeting icy blue.

“Do you care about your people?” June asks and Bream for the first time, something flashes behind his icy eyes. “Because I recall you used to negotiate with the Empire for your people but now - now you have become one of their soldiers. Taking orders without question.”

“I do what I must to keep these people safe.”

“You do nothing!” June shoots back making Bream stare down at her with his throat bobbing. “You are nothing but a coward. Your people now work twice as hard for food rations that hardly feed their families and now this heat will kill them off in time as you allow these troops to guard a body of water sacred to them. I am getting my people into that water and I do not care how many I must take down for that to happen.” June says fiercly as Bream shakes his head.

“You are playing with fire.”

“Maybe I am the fire.” June comments before leaving. And she does, she figures out a way of distracting the stormtroopers away from the pond for the day and it allows several villagers to cool off in the pond water. To the point, she celebrates with Sardie who jumps in beside her making her laugh as he playfully splashes water on her face. June laughs and Sardie takes her by her waist drawing her close as he says lowly,

“You did it woman. Junie has saved us all another day!” He celebrates breathlessly as their faces come close together. June’s heart skips a beat, her arms around his shoulders as the moment heats. His eyes glance down towards her lips as and he begins to lean in, she is grateful for the distraction of their friend jumping in beside them. She lets go of Sardie pushing away and continuing swimming leaving her head spinning at the fact she almost kissed her best friend.

Towards the end of the swimming, everyone has left and June is now the last one out beside some people who stand off the shoreline drying off. She squeezes the towel wrapped in her hair as she dries off when heavy boots crunch in the nearby gravel. She has to keep from rolling her eyes when she spots Bream who looks anything but amused.

“You are putting everyone in danger, June.” He says. She shakes her head,

“The distraction worked. The only one putting them in danger is you if you report this. Are you?” She questions eyes glancing up towards Bream who stills. He looks as if he is fighting a war inside himself before he sighs and shakes his head,

“Of course not - but if they find out. What am I to do?” He questions and it is the first time June has heard some sort of emotion from him - concern.

“Then I will take care of it.” She shoots back and he rolls his eyes.

“Must you always be the hero? Do you not understand I am lead of this village?”

“From what it seems like, I am leading this village more than you. You are nothing but a puppet for the Empire-“

“I will not lead these people into a rebellion that will sacrifice the majority. What you are doing is reckless-“

“What I am doing?” She lets out a gasp. “How dare you-“ but then he leans down close to her, large hand wrapping around her forearm and turning them around as if shielding her from someone. She then hears the coms of the troopers in the distance and her heart drops. They walk past, without a glance over towards them.

“I am trying to protect you. If you do not work with me, we all will die.” Bream explains quietly and June shakes her head stubbornly.

“If you do not work with me, then we all will die.” She repeats back.

The dream then fast forwards and Bream is beginning to work alongside June secretly. Sardie does not know of this but is growing suspicious as one day he sees June and Bream speaking together in private behind one of the military trucks one evening. Sardie does not confront June about it but he starts to notice how June no longer speaks ill of Bream as much as she used to.

There is one evening, where the torches flicker as a group of villagers along with June and Sardie speak of plans to distract troops to grab another supply of ammunition. They sit in a circle on crates, a map drawn by June in the middle as they discuss in hushed voices. As June speaks and then allows the others to give their opinions, Sardie’s arm brushes against June’s causing her to glance in his direction as he leans forward with a sigh.

“Are you sure this will work?” He asks. June nods with confidence,

“It has to.”

That evening, as they all break for bed. June walks to her hut and inside Bream stands looking over one of her books left out on the table. She narrows her eyes as the soft flicker of the candle casts a shadow across his face sharpening his features.

“You read interesting books.” He mumbles placing the book back on the table as June shrugs off her jacket.

“What are you doing here?” She questions as he turns, boots scuffing the hardwood floor as he places his hands behind his back looking down to the floor in thought.

“Your plan - it’s faulty. I fear they already anticipate your next move.”

“And how would they know that?” She questions not believing Bream. She steps over to the side, placing her blaster and knives on the table beside her cot. Bream sighs, of course she would not believe him.

“You are moving more than usual. You are drawing unwanted attention-“

“We will be careful, we always are.”

“You don’t understand-“ Bream starts.

“We are going west this time, we always go east then north-“

“JUNE LISTEN-“ Bream fires before letting out a sigh and pinching the bridge of his nose. He squeezes his eyes shut before stepping forward placing his hands upon her shoulders making her still, staring up at him with lips slightly parted. Never had she seen so much emotion come from this man as stress and worry crosses his face. “Just trust me when I say - do not go through with it tomorrow evening. They will capture everyone at no mercy. I am warning you.” June looks over his face before nodding.

“Fine.” She whispers as he lets go of her shoulder and takes a step away nodding his head with a look of exhaustion. “Fine.” She repeats.

The dream skips forward to the last part. Maybe a month later, as tensions have started to rise more regarding a rebellion against the Empire. The day is coming close to the breaking point for the villagers despite the warnings coming from Bream. One day in particular, June is walking by herself down the dirt road, her boots scuffing the gravel as she carries a backpack of ammunition just stolen. It was risky but she did it without any problems. And as she gets closer to the village, a truck pulls up behind her with troops on it stopping her.

June’s heart speeds as the troopers hop down from the vehicle and question her. June makes up a lie as she nears the village, regarding her sick uncle and needing more supplies. The troops do not buy it and start to manhandle her attempting to rip the backpack off her. She struggles in their grip and eventually fights back instinctively. She kicks her leg swooping one Stormtrooper down to the ground as she dodges a blaster shot in time to knock it out of his hands and swoop the second trooper. But the third’s aim is better and shoots her in the shoulder making her scream out in pain. He’s about to shoot her again, when suddenly a blaster sounds in the distance and all three are taken down. June gasps from the ground gripping her shoulder as she whips her head around.

“Bream.” She says breathlessly as pain shoots up her shoulder. He runs up to her placing his blaster in his holster and helps her up. “Why-“ She begins but he hushes her leading her into the dense forest beside them to hide.

“The rebellion has begun.” He says with a frown as they walk through the forest.

And it did, the whole village has now turned into a place of war for several days. The troops have backed off a bit for one evening, regrouping and deciding a new strategy as the villagers make plans of their own. One night, June has her shoulder in a sling and walks outside the hut to grab fresh air with a soft sigh. She walks off behind the hut near the forest looking up at the star filled sky with hope. As she stands there, Bream walks beside her away from watchful eyes as he leans against the tree looking up as well.

“Why did you follow me?” June asks quietly. He glances down at her and sighs,

“Making sure you’re okay.” He mumbles and she smiles for the first time because of something he says. She nods her head glancing back at him.

“I’m okay.” She turns to face him now tilting her head up at his tall frame. “Are you okay?” She questions and for the first time a grin crosses over his lips.

“I will be.” He says and they stare at each other for a long moment, soaking everything in when suddenly he leans down, “Can I-“ but he becomes quiet when June stands on her toes and captures his lips with hers. They kiss for a long moment, slow and full of passion. His arms instinctively winding around her waist pulling her closer as the unknown of war surrounds them. This could be their last moment - and they needed to feel something other than surviving.

Of course this dream missed a lot of their growing feelings and relationship but it was a beautiful story. I would love for this to become a short story that takes place in the star wars universe and if I or someone else writes it! It has the potential of being a really great story. Maybe this will inspire you to write? And if it does, please tag me as I would LOVE to read it!

Happy Holidays

[merakifreedom]

November 23rd, 2025

~A Prince’s Love~

{ Dream Journal Entry #5 }

In this dream, I was watching as a third person. This is rare to me as I am usually the first person experiencing the dream but this time it was as if I were watching a movie.

The names of the characters were not said/remembered during the entirety of the dream so I will only describe each character by their rank (prince, guard, woman).

The dream began following the woman. She was young, with long black hair as straight and silky as could be. She had the deepest brown eyes that swirled like honey in the sun and the fairest skin yet her cheeks would tint pink when embarrassed or exercising with her katana. She was a fighter, a warrior despite being a female and yet was one of the best fighters at the time. She was quiet, stuck to herself and kept out of trouble yet there was one moment she practice by herself in the gardens and caught the eye of the Prince.

He was a brooding Prince. Never satisfied with anything and known to have been ruthless and unforgiving. The slightest step out of turn and it would cost you your life. He was known to be a cruel prince but only encouraged by the King as he trained him to be next in line. This prince was handsome though despite the bitterness inside. With dark long hair, always kept perfectly up and in place, sharp features of his face, and stood tall and fit. Despite his brothers who wore brighter colors of traditional clothing, he always wore black.

At this meeting in the gardens, this prince felt awestruck upon seeing the woman warrior training by herself. Her moves graceful yet deadly of her opponent had faced her then. It was love at first sight, yet this prince would never admit it with his bitterness and pride. So he continued on with his day yet the woman always remained in his thoughts.

Skip forward several months and the two had had their run-ins with each other. The woman was fierce and not at all a great listener to orders made by the Prince and yet despite her arguing back which was very much frowned upon - he kept her alive. Anyone else he would have already sentenced to their deaths but with her - it was as if he lived for the arguing and drama from this woman warrior. He secretly liked how she pushed back at him even though he would never truly show it.

There was a moment during the dream where they practiced fighting together despite the woman’s protests. The prince insisted and this was where the turning point of their relationship begun. They practiced with fighting sticks, in the garden as the prince’s guard watched unamused from the side. The fighting was well matched, and it had a beauty to it that felt like they were meant to be together. It was as if they were dancing with each other as the wooden sticks collided pushing against each other before spinning around, dodging before colliding again. By nightfall, the two had started talking more civilly between each other as they walked the garden. The prince’s guard scowling behind them for unknown reasons we would learn much later. But let’s say the prince’s pinky brushed against the woman’s for a moment before they parted ways.

Fast forward, and the dream skipped to a more intense part of this story where the Prince had two people sentenced to death for having lied to him regarding politics. Each of them received one slash of a katana on their back - if they lived it was meant they had one more chance to make up for their wrong doings. If they died from this wound, they would pay for their choices in the afterlife and be reborn again poor.

The woman watched the executions from the side, always having thought they were wrong. She had her arms crossed to the side, her dark blue dress and armor catching in the sunlight as her long hair casted over her shoulder. A scowl on her face in which caught the Prince’s attention though he did nothing to question her later.

The dream seemed to skip important information her as then suddenly the woman warrior ends up being tricked and framed for a killing of a friend who was also a warrior. The tensions are high as she had been beaten by her fellow guards and imprisoned. With cuts on her face and a bleeding head, she was soon hoisted up to her feet and forced out in front of everyone for her execution. Apparently this had taken place while the Prince was absent to an unknown place. Which only meant no one was there to save her as the accusations against her were grave.

With tears running down her face, the clothing on her back was ripped open to reveal her untouched skin. And as she shook in fear, awaiting the excruciating pain of the blade against flesh, a single tear fell down her face as her lips whispered the name of the King. In one fluid moment, the blade came down with a fast and harsh movement slicing her back deep and clean. She fell to the ground, the kingdom surrounding her in silence as the blood spilled onto the brick, unmoving.

Skip forward, and the Prince had returned successfully from his mission and ready to celebrate the good news looking for a certain someone. For the first time as he walked the hallways, he had a small smile of excitement on his lips, his usual dark eyes had a glint of warmness behind him as he looked for the woman he had recently started to befriend. But his excitement soon ended with grief upon finding out of her execution. He became angry and unforgiving especially after someone had already brought evidence of her innocence before she had been executed. For several weeks, the prince made it his mission to bring honor to her and find the person who framed her innocence.

Skip forward, the person who betrayed the woman warrior had ended up being the Prince’s guard. It is a huge blow to the prince when he finds out, his eyes wide as he takes a step back shaking his head at his guard who had been there with him for several years - one of his best friends. He is in shock as the other guards raise their swords towards the prince’s guard who scows at the prince. The reason was - he felt he had lost focus on becoming king. That the woman warrior had made him make recent decisions that might have shown mercy which was never the true ways of a King.

The Prince orders for the imprisonment of the guard and demands he stays imprisoned for the rest of his life - for death would be far too much of an easy punishment. He wanted the guard to suffer for having gone against his trust and orders along with framing the woman he had started to love. Someone who understood him and made him feel like a human once again.

In the end, the prince found himself sitting alone in the garden during the night. The stars gleaming above him as he sat on the bridge, the water flowing peacefully beneath him that rippled in the moonlight. But much to his surprise, he heard his name softy said behind him and when he turned his head he found the woman warrior standing at the edge of the garden looking healthy and very much alive. His heart leaped at the sight of her. It did not take long before he was up and running over to her, picking her up and twirling her in a hug. Her laughter was like a song to his ears as he placed her back down on her feet as his hands rested at the small of her waist. He could not believe it - he felt it had to be a dream as she reached up and placed the palm of her hand against his cheek.

It did not take long for him to lean down and meet her lips with his. The kiss was slow and sweet, a tear falling down her cheek as she wound her arms around his shoulders, a hand on the nape of his neck bringing him closer as he tugged her waist to bring her flushed against him. When they pulled away, tears brimmed the prince’s eyes as he looked over her face.

“I thought you dead.”

“For you - I lived.”

Though like usual my dreams miss key parts to the story, this one felt like watching a KDrama with a happy ending. If anyone knows of a drama that has a similar plot, I would love to watch it. Send me your recommendations or if there aren’t any - then perhaps this should become a drama in the near future! Haha. Anyways, if you choose to use this as inspiration to a book - please let me know as I’d love to support and read it. Happy Holidays!

[merakifreedom]

September 11th, 2025

~ Stranger Things ~

{ Dream Journal Entry #4 }

It was a late fall night, the sun had just started to set and my heart was beginning to race with anticipation and anxiety. I knew something bad was going to happen, as it always did when it came to the evening hours.

I was at a house that was not my own, and wore an oversized flannel that was not mine but my boyfriend’s. When I caught a glimpse of myself in the reflection of the window as I walked past the house outside, I had long curly brown hair, and a short and thin build. Like usual in my dreams, even though I may experience the dream through my own eyes…my reflection is always different. I am always a different person.

As I walked through the grass of the front of the house, I heard a man’s voice tell me to make sure I locked the gate in a hurried voice as time was running out. I found myself hurrying over to the carport and found a tall gate and immediately went inside, and locked it with several locks and pulled it ensuring it would not budge.

Next, I went over to the other side of the carport and locked the fence going to the backyard. As I did so, I began hearing groans in the distance making my blood run cold — they were coming. I swallowed my fear and immediately went to the side door of the house and when I entered, Steve from Stranger Things (Yeah crazy wtaf) rushed over taking my hand and helping me up the stairs.

“Did you lock everything?” He asked and I nodded my head running a hand through my curls in stress. He ushered me into a bedroom which I then realized and recognized (even though this was my first dream ever of this situation) was his. I quickly sat down on the bed as a chill went through my body and Dustin came in with disheveled hair and dirt on his nose. He wore padding and held a metal bat in his hands saying,

“Those things are getting stronger every night.”

“Where are the others?” I found myself asking without thinking. Dustin frowned and said,

“They made it to the other house. They won’t make it tonight.” And I found myself nodding my head. I grabbed my knife on the bedside table with shaking hands as we readied for the sleepless night we were about to experience. As Dustin left to guard the door, Steve sat beside me on the bed and cupped my face in his hands getting me to look at him.

“We will be okay.” He whispered and I shook my head with tears in my eyes.

“We have been dealing with this for so long. How much longer until they take one of us?” I asked with a tears sliding down my face. He looked over my face before sighing and bringing me into a hug tucking his chin on top of my head.

“Don’t think like that. You know I will always protect you.” He says quietly as I hold him.

The dream breaks into a different scene. I am downstairs that night and immediately fighting off a Zombie-type person. Their arms reach towards me as I fight them off at the door with a bat with nails in it. The sounds are gruesome and my heart is racing not knowing where Dustin or Steve are. But eventually I am able to get the Zombie away.

The rest of the night is fighting them and eventually we are able to rebuild the fence in time for us to go upstairs into the bedrooms, locking the doors and barricading ourselves enough to get some sleep.

The dream cuts to the next day, and I am walking a hallway of the library. We are researching more about this Zombie/Possession breakout the world is experiencing the best we can. I find Steve in the corner of the room and walk up to him noticing he has a cut on the left side of his face. My heart drops and I ask him if he got that last night from fighting. He glares up at me, catching me off guard as his mood as done a total flip,

“I’m fine” He snaps. And I furrow my eyebrows in confusion at his moodiness. I set my stuff down on the table and I sit down leaning back. He is focused on reading as I try to figure out what has happened without making him angrier but before I can do anything, he slams the book and mumbles something about he has somewhere to be. He leaves me.

Fast forward in the dream, I’m back in Steve’s house and he is not home much to my surprise as it is nearing sunset. I place my belongings on the ground beside the bed and sit down against the headboard turning on the tv. I feel myself unable to focus on the show as the window to my left is beginning to darken, the light of the tv casting over the dark room as I wait. I feel my heart dropping thinking something might have happened to him, but just as I am about to convince myself he is not coming I hear the door open and his footsteps echoing up the stairs. I let out a soft sigh of relief as he enters the door shrugging off his jacket.

I sit up on the edge of the bed, my hands on the corner of the mattress as I look up at him curiously. He has a small smile on his face as he looks at me, walks over and pulls me up to stand. I let out a soft laugh as he places his face in the crook of my neck and I ask where he has been. BUT, he doesn’t answer and as he holds me he begins kissing my neck, hands roaming my hips as he pushes me onto the bed still latching to my neck. I let out a gasp and feel something is different, this is not like usual. It’s hurried - almost a hunger but not in the good way. I push against his chest getting him to stop and I cup his face in my hands furrowing my eyebrows in confusion as to what is happening - a bad feeling growing in my gut.

“What are you doing?” I ask carefully as his looks down at me in confusion but I catch something - almost like a shadow move in his right eye. It’s a flicker and gone before I can realize what it is.

“Can’t I love my girlfriend?” He defends but something is different in his voice as the smile turns to a grin almost wickedly. My eyes widen at his change of demeanor almost as if he possessed. I push him back,

“This isn’t you.” I mumble and he lets out a laugh like I’m being unbelievable. He goes to pull me into him again but I dodge him. He gets angry, a growl escaping his throat as he glares at me. His eyes turning red as if he rubbed them raw. The shadow turns his right eye entirely black and my heart drops. I hear Dustin enter the house downstairs like usual. Steve notices too but he places a finger against his lips but I don’t listen, I quickly run out of the room and down the stairs calling for Dustin.

Dustin’s eyes widen as I nearly fling myself behind him as Steve hurries down the stairs but stops glaring at Dustin.

“Something’s wrong.” I whisper and Dustin puts his hands up towards Steve saying,

“Woah there friend. How are you feeling?”

Unfortunately…the dream ends there as I wake to my alarm to get ready for the day. It is the first dream I have ever had regarding Stranger Things but also with it being a Zombie Apocalypse/Demonic Possession vibe. It was cool, crazy, and scary at the same time! If anyone wants to use this idea for a fanfiction or imagine, just tag me! I would love to read it.

[merakifreedom]

July 23rd, 2025

~ My Person ~

{ Dream Journal Entry #3 }

I had another dream, one where I was not in my own body. I was not myself at all. I was still a girl, but I was younger than my 25 year old self, a part of me felt I had just turned 19. I was in a university of some sort, had a friend group but my closest friend was a boy. He stood tall, taller than me. Had black hair that fell in messy loose curls and a slim physique. His name I remember was Kimi. I’m sure there was much more to his name but I called him Kimi for short.

Kimi had a best friend, another boy who was a little shorter than him but still taller than me. He had the same kind of hair but it swooped more to the left than Kimi’s who fell towards the front of his face. His name was Yuuto. He did not like me much at all from what I could gather. I remember feeling hesitant around him waiting for some smart remark from him. He was quite annoying.

The dream started out with getting in a minor car accident with Kimi. We had been driving to somewhere late at night when we were t-boned by another driver. Kimi was not hurt aside from a small bruise forming on the side of his face but me, I remember looking down at my lap. I was wearing a skirt and the top of both my thighs had been sliced by something. They were not life threatening deep but enough I was sent to the hospital to get stitches.

So there I was at the hospital. Laying on a gurney, and some nurses come around to take care of me. I’m in my room, getting stitched while Kimi sat beside me talking about how Yuuto was on his way. I roll my eyes with a tired sigh…great.

During the time we wait for Yuuto, I mention to the nurse that I have been having sharp pained headaches for a while couple months now accompanied by dizziness and fainting.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Kimi asked me when the nurse walked out and I sigh looking down at my fingers. I shrug not having the words to say why I put it off. When Kimi is about to argue, Yuuto walks in with his hoodie pulled over his head looking unamused to be here at the early morning hours of 2am.

“You made it.” Kimi announces with a smirk while Yuuto plops down in the chair beside him.

“I’m tired.” Yuuto announces and I have to force myself not to roll my eyes.

“You could have stayed home.” I shake my head but Yuuto doesn’t meet my gaze like usual. He avoids it actually and it’s the first time he doesn’t bite back at me. He stays silent while Kimi hides his amusement at his friend.

Time rolls on and somehow the dream has turned to being in class. My head is pounding and I don’t know what happened at the hospital whether I found out my condition or not. But Yuuto is sitting two spaces down from me as the lecture ends. I find myself resting my cheek against the coolness of the desk finding some relief to my pain. Yuuto moves to the desk in front of me as I hide my face in my arms closing my eyes not realizing everyone had already left. He turns in the desk and I feel his hand rest on my forearm saying,

“You need to go rest.”

I furrow my eyebrows and lift my head at the sound of his voice and I notice something different in his eyes. It’s not annoyance or frustration. It’s a hint of something else I hadn’t seen him look at me with. I remember getting up and leaving slinging my backpack around my shoulders before leaving without a word.

Fast forward again (because dreams like to tease and create confusion of how the story had progressed) but it’s raining and I believe Kimi and I had an argument about something the dream did not reveal to me. I sit down on a bench, as it pours down.

“You’re so dramatic.” I hear Yuuto’s unamused voice from a distance and I turn my head seeing him walking from the direction Kimi went. I glare at him,

“Go away Yuuto.” And he laughs. He has the audacity to laugh before plopping down on the bench as the rain starts up. It’s starting to soak my clothes.

“He means well.” Yuuto explains and I shake my head.

“I’m trying.” I say referring to my health and whatever was wrong with the health of my head. And I’m surprised to find myself starting to cry. I wipe my tears and before I know it, to my surprise he is wrapping an arm around me and brings me into his chest. I’m surprised with how much I relax in his embrace and soon his other arm is around me. It feels like home.

Of course the dream unfortunately ends here. It’s not as eventful nor descriptive as my other dreams but it was enough for me to want to write down. Perhaps it will have a second part in the future but for now I leave it here, so I do not forget! Dreams are interesting. It’s as if we travel to different versions of ourselves in different timelines filled with what-if’s.

[merakifreedom]

March 21st, 2025

~ Stuck in Japan ~

{ Dream Journal Entry #2 }

I was living in Japan in an apartment complex with four other people who were my friends. Three were girls who I had known in college, and one was a guy who had just moved into the empty apartment next door to mine who we all became well acquainted with.

In this apartment, we lived higher up as my bedroom window had a beautiful view of the city. With beautiful trees decorating the streets with clear blue skies and a city skyline in the distance. With how far the city was, it told me I lived on the outskirts. Far enough away to appreciate the natural beauty of the land.

My bedroom was very plain looking, pastel faded pinks and beiges. My bed was situated near the window on the floor with a large pale blue floral comforter with several pillows of cute different designs. My walls were not decorated, I made a mental note to start shopping for decorations to design it better. I had not been living in this apartment very long, it probably had not been six months quite yet since coming here with my friends.

In the corner opposite of my bed, I did have a wooden vanity desk with a clear plastic chair that had a white fluffy throw blanket covering half of it. I walked over and sat down looking at myself in the mirror. Just as my previous dreams have always been, it is not me looking into the mirror but a different looking girl.

I had black hair that came down a little past my collar bones that had a slight wave to it. I must not have liked the natural waves because there was a well used hair straightener clipped to the side of the desk, no curling iron or curl creams in sight. I had light colored brown eyes and my face was quite small. My chin came down to a point, my cheeks were slightly red and my lips were a pale pink and small, yet my eyes were the largest part of my face…but everything was matched well. I looked very pretty and I remember reaching out to touch my face and being in awe at my reflection.

Now, as the dream introduced the character I was playing I noticed a book on my bed. The cover said, “Home Design” on it with a company name that I do not remember. I remember grabbing this book and stuffing it in my shoulder bag before grabbing my phone and walking out of the bedroom.

I was greeted by two of the girls I lived with, as we shared a common living/kitchen area though our bedrooms were locked and private. They were both sitting on the couch, laughing at a magazine they were both sharing. When I came over, one of the girls patted the couch next to her to have me join them.

“Are you nervous today?” I nodded my head at the question and sighed with a smile. I started getting flashes of memories with the new guy who began living at the apartment. Very tall and slim looking. Messy black hair that fell in the front, and dressed very nicely with long coats even on the hottest of days. I remember bumping into him on accident from the elevator as my face was in my phone texting someone. I apologized many times to him but he only smiled and laughed it off. There, he introduced himself as Kimoshi. (Given, I absolutely do not know any Japanese and these name were just randomly given to me in a dream. This name, I looked up, I believe really shows the foreshadowing of this character which upon waking up and finding out brings chills to my body. I had no idea what the meaning of this name is until now writing this!)

We got to talking and he explained he had just started working as an assistant to the head of a popular home designer company. I explained my passion in home design and that in college it was one of the things I looked into for jobs and running a business. He then told me he would introduce me to the company and see if I could get an intern job to see if it’s something I am actually interested in.

This news was very exciting for me, though I was extremely nervous as I was a shy girl who was not used to large opportunities such as this. Today, I dressed my best in buisness casual wearing a black pencil skirt, short heels, a pastel pink blouse with ruffles in the front, and a white blazer. My hair was pulled up with a clawclip with some loose short hairs falling to the sides. The girls approved of my outfit and told me not to worry. Within time, Kimoshi entered the living room ready for me to follow him out the door.

Now, my dream fast forwarded quite a bit and there is a very large chunk of information that is missing unfortunately. I do not remember what happened but I know it fast forwarded to around 6-months later and I was somehow dating the CEO of that company who Kimoshi was an assistant to. The head guy was not much older than I and all I know is we both fell in love like a disney movie where it was love at first sight…though it was a slow burn for a while. The dreamed skipped to where we were at the end of this slow burn and finally showing our feelings for each other.

Hiroshi was his name if I remember correctly. And he was very handsome with sharp features, wavy black hair that was always styled nicely, and stood taller than me but not as tall as Kimoshi. He was very sweet and attentive, which was the complete opposite of what others would have described him. His feelings were hidden from everyone, not allowing the sweet nature I saw come out in front of people. That is why it was a slowburn, because it took him so long to accept his feelings and be willing to be vulnerable and not this stone-faced feared man.

A moment I remember vividly that the dream skipped to, was a late night walking a store mall with both Hiroshi and Kimoshi. They were doing important business that had to do with candles and how well they were selling at this particular store. I did not want to come along but Hiroshi insisted to come and smell the candles, wanting an opinion of their quality from someone outside of the company. (Oh yeah, I ended up not getting the internship for some reason but Idek I was fine with it? lmao who knows)

As we walked down the isles, I did notice a look a woman gave Kimoshi that seemed very odd to me. When she turned the corner and saw him, her eyes went huge and immediately she ducked away from sight. Kimoshi did not notice, but I did look around the corner after passing to see if the woman was okay but she was nowhere in sight. I was the only one who noticed as Hiroshi took my hand in his and continued talking about business with Kimoshi. I made a mental note to that encounter as my gut was telling me there was something odd and I saw that moment for a reason.

An hour had gone by, and I was feeling very exhausted as it was nearing midnight. I remember sitting at a table in the corner of the store in a cafe that was attached and looking out the window at the city lights. It was a beautiful sight for sure watching the slow traffic below and the twinkling lights of surrounding buildings in the distance glistening into the night. I watched as my eyelids grew heavy and before I knew it, my head was rested against my hand and I was falling asleep.

“Have you fallen asleep?” I heard a familiar voice whisper in my ear as I felt an arm wrap around my shoulder bringing me into their chest. I sighed, keeping my eyes closed and nodded my head. I felt a gentle press against the side of my head giving me a sweet kiss before Hiroshi rested his cheek against my head. We stayed like this for a moment, unmoving. It felt nice and safe as the encounter before with Kimoshi had stirred something in my chest. I guess before, though my dream had not showed me, Kimoshi had been acting oddly and there was just a demeanor about him that I could not quite understand.

I heard Hiroshi mumble something to Kimoshi and before I knew it, I was being lifted up and carried out of the mall. I peaked an eye up at Kimoshi as he carried me and something just kept feeling wrong but I pretended to sleep as we got to the car that would drive us back home.

Fast forward, and it was day time in the apartment and I was getting ready to make something for breakfast. In the apartment, there were two refrigerators. One dedicated to food, another dedicated to drinks. I was the only one up at the moment or at least in the common area as I rummaged through the fridge. I heard slow footsteps coming from behind me and I quickly turned around, startled. It was Kimoshi, and he had a determined look on his face. I clutched at my heart and nervously laughed saying, “You scared me!” He smirked and reached behind me for a bottle of water. My smile dropped at how close he was and I didn’t like how he lingered a bit. I then turned back around and reached for a bowl and as I turned around he was still close, just staring down at me.

“Can I help you Kimoshi?” I questioned attempting to push past him, but he did the unthinkable and immediately took a hold of my throat. I gasped and scratched at his hand but his grip only tightened. “Kimoshi!” I tried to yell through my gasps as he pushed me into the fridge. I kicked and thrashed and right before I was about to lose consciousness, he let go. I fell to the floor gasping trying to collect myself as he loomed above me. I could faintly hear my friends starting to come out of a room and Kimoshi immediately backed up and started to drink his water acting as if nothing happened.

“What are you doing on the floor?” One of my friends questioned as she helped me off the floor. The others giggled not in a malicious way, but in a way as they assumed I had been clumsy which I had been known to be. I shook my head, moving my hair out of my face avoiding any eye contact with Kimoshi.

“I slipped I guess.” I commented as the girls shook their heads and continued talking about how I need to be more careful. But my ears were ringing and my heart was racing faster than it ever had. Did this just happen? Was I just attacked by someone I had grown to trust. Who Hiroshi trusted like a brother? I swallowed hard, placed my breakfast back in the fridge and made an excuse to head back to my room, mumbling something about getting ready for the day.

I remember closing my door softly and pressing my body against it, sliding down to the floor feeling that if I left that spot; my safety would be jeopardized as if my weight would not allow him to burst through the door. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths trying to control my uncontrolled breaths. It was as if it were destined by the universe but my phone beside me that had fallen out of my pocket started to buzz and on the screen was Hiroshi’s name. I sighed hitting the back of my head against the door, dreading answering as I was not sure how to go about this situation. I was terrified, traumatized and confused. I couldn’t tell him, how could I? With shaking hands, I tapped my screen and brought the phone to my ear pausing for a second.

“Come to the door.” He said. I could hear a smile on his face and I scrunched my eyebrows together.

“What?” I questioned. My mind was still buzzing after the events that had just happened and this was the last thing I would have expected to hear as Hiroshi never came to the apartment. He always wanted to stay in the car outside, not ready to meet my friends. He was worried about what they might think of him, as his reputation was not the greatest even though I explained they were not judgmental like the media was.

“Come to the door love, I have a surprise.” I stood from the floor and quickly exited out of my bedroom and hurried to the front door. My friends looking at me like I was crazy and Kimoshi sitting at the bar stool tapping away at his phone. I opened the door and immediately a smile formed on my face upon seeing Hiroshi. Before he could even say anything, I threw myself at him wrapping my arms around him with watering eyes. I had taken him by surprise and he laughed hugging me back rocking me back and forth with his face pressed into my neck. He had no idea but the fact he was there in that moment was my saving grace. I was so scared and within minutes he happened to show up at my doorstep.

“You know we saw each other last night right?” He asked quietly trying to make sense of my sudden need of affection. I laughed, and nodded my head saying, “Of course, I’m just really happy you’re here.” I stepped back and he gave me a soft kiss on the lips holding my face gently with his hand. I heard the girls behind me start talking and awing at the gesture which I ignored completely.

The dream then fast forwarded a small bit, he met my friends talked with them for awhile as Kimoshi stayed sitting at the bar stool with his phone still. Hiroshi would make comments to Kimoshi with which he would respond with a nod or a grunt not really active in the conversations. Hiroshi didn’t seem to notice the change in his attitude and probably shook it off as he was busy or tired from a night out. Hiroshi mentioned he wanted to show me something outside and while we got up from the couch and saying goodbye to my friends, he looked at Kimoshi and I knew immediately he was going to ask him to come along. I quickly stood in front of Hiroshi and placed a hand on his chest whispering, “How about just me and you?” I could see him think about it and then nodded his head, saying goodbye to everyone once again.

Closing the door behind me, we walked hand in hand down the stairs and to the elevator. Again, my mind started racing now realizing I left my friends with Kimoshi. Would he attack them too? Was I the only one he was coming after for a reason unknown? My thoughts went back to the night in the mall where that woman looked absolutely horrified of him upon recognizing who he was. This could not be some kind of coincidence. As my thoughts continued, I felt a squeeze of my hand and I glanced over to Hiroshi.

“What are you thinking about?” He questioned. “Nothing.” I quickly responded and gave a reassuring smile, but I could tell Hiroshi knew I was hiding something from him but he did not pressure me to say. Something I loved about him. As the elevator doors opened and we walked outside, I noted how nice of a day it was. The sky was very blue and fluffy white clouds decorated the sky. Birds were chirping, there was a soft cool breeze and the flowers were blooming on the nearby fruit trees. The warm rays of the sun made me close my eyes for a quick moment and a genuine smile adorned my face.

We walked up to a car that I had never seen before, it was a cherry red sporty-looking car. Very expensive looking. I looked at Hiroshi and he gave me a smirk waving the keys between his two fingers.

“Yours?” I questioned. He nodded his head and I looked at the car wide eyed. “And you are going to drive it?” I questioned again. He rolled his eyes,

“Of course I am. I got it for us.”

I smiled and allowed him to open the door for me. I sat down and buckled up looking around the black leather interior. As he got situated, he pressed a button and the roof came down into a convertible. I leaned my head back against the seat and closed my eyes feeling the wind as he began to drive out of the parking lot. It was odd, going from being attacked by a potential psychopath who is supposed to be our best friend and my boyfriend’s most trusted assistant…to now having a joyride with my loving boyfriend who knows nothing about the attack on his girlfriend by a trusted friend.

Lastly, my dream skipped forward in the middle of intense action. I don’t know the events that led up to this, but it was midnight and I was running for my life down an alleyway. Blood was streaming down my face from getting my head slammed into the brick wall. All I knew, was Kimoshi killed one of my friends and upon me finding her body and him looming over her, I was next. He immediately tried chasing me, but I was faster somehow and I was running down the alleys of the streets near my apartment. I didn’t know where to go but all I knew was if I stopped running, he would catch me.

This chase took place for what felt like eternity, hiding behind dumpsters, getting on a bus and driving to god knows where, trying to call Hiroshi but his line being dead. Everything was just falling apart. And it all ended with me finding a police station (typical) and begging for the police to save me.

Hours go by, I’m sitting in the police station with my head bandages, a blue hospital blanket over my shoulders and replying to any questions the investigator has for me. In the end, they caught Kimoshi and arrested him to continue the investigation. They went to the apartment and taped off the crime scene of one of my friends and overall, everything ended up being settled.

The end of my dream, Hiroshi came running into the police station hurriedly asking for me. When he saw where I was seated, he quickly dropped to his knees and brought my hands into his apologizing for everything. I told him it was not his fault but he continued saying it was and that he should have noticed, and that he should have answered my calls and everything else. I started to cry and he hugged me tightly, petting my hair and trying his best to comfort me.

Fast forward, and it had been several months since the incident took place. I finally gained the courage to grab all my belongings from the apartment with Hiroshi and my two friends. Everyone had moved on, Hiroshi and I lived together and my two friends were living in a different town over. In the end, I was healing and taking it day by day.

(These dreams…they feel so real. It is as if I am acting in a movie. Dreams are fascinating and I continue wondering why we have them. Is it just our minds or is it something more spiritual? I fear we may never know.)

[merakifreedom]

February 9th, 2025

~ Ginger Protector ~

{ Dream Journal Entry #1 }

I had a dream that I was a princess or queen of some type, someone of importance that was being hidden from a man. This man was tall (around 6’3) and gloomy in appearance, around the age of 30. With raven dark hair, and very dark blue eyes. He had a pale complexion with the slightest bit of redness in his face just to let others know he was still very much alive. I do not understand why I was running away from this man. The only thing I knew is he was not a good person, and was trying to force me into marriage.

I was taken to a one story house that was very long with many rooms. The outside of the house looked modern, with red brick as walls along with a dark roof. The weather was an overcast and looked to have been previously raining before arrival. Given the darkness of the concrete and the drops of rain running down the car window. I arrived in a black van with a security guard and a woman who was around my age (24). The security guard dressed in a nice black business suit with dark eye glasses and an ear-piece opened my side of the door, and told me, “We have arrived Celeste.” (Given, this is not my name in real life, yet in the dream it felt very normal to be called this name.) I took his hand and allowed him to guide me out of the van and this was how I became aware of the way I was dressed.

I wore black adidas, with black leggings and a fuzzy white knit sweated that was oversized. In my dream, I felt I was very under dressed as if I was not used to being out in public in such a way. I remember pulling the sleeves down over my hands and crossing them over my chest, a sign of insecurity as I glanced down to the ground waiting for the woman passenger to come out and join me in front of the house. I casted my eyes towards the front door upon hearing a soft creak from it opening. In front of the door stood a younger looking man. I thought, “He couldn’t be much younger than I.” As he stepped forward in the doorway with a sincere grin on his face. I noted what he looked like immediately. Loose ginger curls that fell slightly into his eyes. Slightly reddened cheeks that had a stubble of a mustache and beard forming with a soft tan complexion. He wore a white tshirt with blue jeans. Very ordinary looking.

The guard motioned with his arm to proceed walking to the house to greet the man at the door. I remember my heart beating loudly in my ears, unsure who to trust or even why I was being taken to this unknown residence. As I walked, I kept thinking to myself, “How did I get here? Where is my family? And will these people really keep me safe from him?” The woman beside me had noticed my look of concern or the way my eyes glazed over in thought, so she elbowed me gently with a reassuring look. “Don’t worry Cece, they said they would protect us. They are very strong people.” I raised an eyebrow at this while glancing back at the man we neared. This? This ordinary looking man who did not look at all to be trained in any military, was to protect me from the most powerful cruel man that was after me? I almost laughed but held it in as the man gave a soft, “Welcome,” and “Come in please.”

Upon entering through the door, I stopped and stared at my surroundings. Like expected, an ordinary house with cream colored walls and random pieces of art or photographs adorning them. “Let me show you your room.” I heard from behind me as the door closed with a click. The ginger man looked at me walking past, again still having a look of politeness. I motioned for the security guard to follow me, not fully trusting this whole process. I was used to being in control, but now I felt as if I had lost that privilege somehow.

We walked down a long hallway before he stopped in front of a door.l, opening it for me. I stood beside him looking inside. The room had a queen bed, decorated in dark blue sheets that had a shimmer to them. The room was the same color as the walls outside, cream. There was an antique vanity mirror in the corner near the bed, along with a door that I guessed went to a closet.

“I hope you feel safe and welcome here in the next coming of days. I’m Ralph if you need me.” I looked at him as he explained and I could tell he was really trying to make me feel comfortable, but I still couldn’t shake the uneasiness in my stomach. “I have a call button on the side of your bed. It will alert the security if anything ever were to happen. Even if it is not an emergency, you can call someone. Everyone wakes up thirsty every once in a while.” He chuckled nervously, I noticed. Trying to make the whole situation more light hearted and less serious. I nodded my head and gave him a soft smile in response.

“What if I want to get a glass of water myself?” I wondered. It came out a little too seriously, even though I was trying to respond back in the way he had; but his eyes widened and he hurriedly ushered us back down the hallway to present the kitchen. It was close by and just around the corner.

“Feel free to take whatever you need, all of you.” He looked at the woman beside me as well as on of my guards who I now remember to be named Stanley. Ralph looked at the woman beside me and shook his head, “I’m so sorry for not getting your name. I tend to get ahead of myself.”

“Clary.” She nodded, pushing her blonde hair over her ear. I almost laughed seeing her blush so easily to a man she just met.

Next, we were shown the living room that was large in size with a U-shaped black leather couch in front of a large projector screen that took up most of the wall. Below it had a fake fireplace with led purple flames. There were also several rooms in the right wing, dedicated mostly to security. I didn’t realize how much security Ralph had as I did not see anyone, but he explained to me they like to stay hidden as to not bring too much attention to the property.

(The dream then skipped quite a bit, as usual for me, my dreams tend to fast forward a bit)

From what I knew, it had been a couple of weeks of living with Ralph and his security team. I was feeling trapped, as these long weeks I was not allowed to go outside of the property, not until the man chasing me was officially caught. So far, there were no leads on where he was at but thankfully as the days went past, I was starting to have hope he would never find me in a mundane house like this.

Ralph and I had become good friends. He was very good at trying to keep me entertained, by watching a tv show, playing board games such as Life and Jenga. To showing me his paintings while also teaching me how to paint.

(Clary, I learned was my best friend from childhood but for some reason, in my dream she did not have an active role. She was always in the background doing something else.

As my dream fast forwarded, it stopped at a scene of me waking up from a nightmare late at night.)

I stood up from my bed, and put on a hooded sweater before exiting my bedroom. I walked quietly to the kitchen to make myself a cup of tea which always helps me to get back to sleep. Trying to remember the bad dream, I was in deep thought that I didn’t hear someone entering the kitchen. “I have people who,” I jumped horribly. I was already grabbing my tea and upon hearing a voice behind me I dropped the cup on the counter causing it to spill a little bit. “…can make that”. Ralph had finished during this embarrassing moment for me. I quickly turned around holding my chest and laughed. “Why would you do that?” I gasped. He laughed as well but had a look of apology as he grabbed a nearby hand towel and stood next to me cleaning it. He grabbed the cup in my hand and cleaned the bottom of it for me. I said a soft, “Thank you.” and took it to the bar of the kitchen counter, sitting at a stool.

Ralph came and sat next to me, looking around he wondered, “Do you want any lights on, it’s pretty dark in here. I don’t know how you managed to make that tea in this light.” I rolled my eyes and nudged his shoulder,

“I’m fine, the moonlight is enough for me.” And it was true, it was a full moon that evening and the light was shining through the blinds that were partly closed. We sat there for a moment, in silence as I sipped at my tea. He folded his hands on the table and cleared his throat. I curiously glanced at him, waiting for him to say something as clearly something was on his mind.

“I’m sorry if this sounds rude,” I raised an eyebrow wondering what it could be he was about to ask.” He looked at me with a wonder in his eyes, scanning my face. “You are not from this world, are you?” I remember my heart falling into my stomach as now I started to immediately become aware that I was dreaming (sort of). I know the look on my face was shock as he gave a reassuring smile and nodded his head. He looked away giving me time to respond, but how could I? I was in shock because at first I was Celeste but now I’m suddenly fully aware that I am dreaming. I am living someone else’s life or experience entirely!

“H-How do you know?” I stuttered out still trying to gather myself now being fully conscious. He shrugged his shoulders and replied, “You are different from what I have been told about you. Everyone has seen it, you are not you. It is not a bad thing, but I have realized now that this might be the last time we ever meet.” He sounded sad, and my eyes started to water at this upon this realization. He put an arm around my shoulder and continued whispering, “I feel lucky, to know the truth entirely. There are things we don’t understand but I feel lucky to have spent this time with you. I really admire you, Hannah.” This is what nearly sent me in a spiral. He knew my real name…HOW?! And this is when it turned suddenly.

I was no longer lucid dreaming, I immediately went back into character. I was Celeste and it was like nothing had ever happened. My dream fast forwarded and all of a sudden, the man that had been chasing me appeared in the house. It was chaotic, men were fighting and I was running towards the exit with Ralph beside me trying to escape. But, I remember being yanked back by my shoulder and I let out a yelp. A strong arm wrapped around my chest, hugging me into him. Someone I didn’t want to be near…it was him. He found me. I wrestled in his grip as Ralph yelled for him to let me know.

“Evenenger!” I screamed the man’s name. “Let me go now!”

“No, you refuse my hand and run away? I don’t think so.” His gruff voice was in my ear and it made me shudder in fear. All of a sudden, two men wrestled him off of me and I sprinted towards Ralph but he pushed me further out the door and I realized he was not following me.

“We need to go!” I shouted but Ralph shook his head and went to fight Evenenger. My heart was pounding as I watched Evenenger punch Ralph in the side of his head, immediately making him collapse. Tears were streaming down my face as a security guard grabbed my arm and ushered me towards the black van.

“Evenenger stop!” I cried as he continued to attack Ralph who was still laying unconscious on the ground. The security guard covered my eyes forcing me to turn around to get in the van telling me not to watch. Clary was already in the van, looking battered and bruised with knotted hair. She wiped a tear off her face and said,

“This is how the story always ends. I’m sorry.”

*******************

This was the end of the dream. I woke up to my normal bed with my heart pounding. I attempted to go back to sleep but alas, it was not meant to be. Could dreams be entirely made up? Or do our souls travel through the end of time, searching for another life to explore in different universes.

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Welcome to my tumblr page…this is where I will continue documenting the most vivid dreams I experience. These are the dreams I remember enough to write down before they disappear again.