Jamie having been/being Christian is So fucking important to me, you lot have no idea
I may have found my roman empire, in fact
Guys. Guys. It would FUCK to see that bitch in a confessional.
I need to put him on his knees and only in an almost-gay way. This dude needs to enter a comprecation. He needs to palter about canvassing an area if he gotta talk to a priest. I WANT! TO WATCH! HIM PRAY!
Malcolm needs to be envious of God. Guys- GUYS-
He has a rosary tucked away in his bottom drawer like an object of shame. It’s dusty asf and the last time he used it was a decade ago. He uses it in his head, though, it’s a practiced movement with his fingers. Dude has never stayed still in his life- his knees jiggle when he’s sitting- his eyes flicker around the room when he enters it- his arms flap when he talks. His fingers play with an imaginary rosary. Malcolm’s caught him doing it. It makes him think about breaking them.
He stole a priests collar once when he was drunk. He meant to burn it. Malcolm burnt his childhood crucifix with him when he first left the church- as sort of a catharsis thing- and he really thought he could replicate that feeling. He wants to feel as sure as he did that day- by his side. He woke up clutching it in the morning. He could barely let it go.
God exists. Probably. Maybe. If he does, he’s not going to Heaven. He doesn’t deserve it, but. Well. He WANTS. Has always wanted.
It hardly matters now. It’s done. Finished. He doesn’t need it. He doesn’t need to be pure. Holy. Good. Salvageable. He doesn’t.
Guys. He means nothing to me guys. Guys! Trust!
He is SELFISH and SELF-LOATHING and BROKEN and fixing himself would surely kill him, but that has never been the reason that he doesn’t try and HE MEANS NOTHING TO ME!!!!
He was DILLUSIONED from the CHURCH because of MALCOLM, who then FAILED HIM as much as the CHURCH DID!!!!!! AND HE MEANS NOTHING TO ME!!!!!!!!!!
In this world instead of Jamie quitting seminary school, he somehow dragged Malcolm into to it. Malcolm still doesn’t believe in God (or at least not the christian one), but he ends up becoming Scotland’s only Cardinal, with Jamie to his side (because if Jamie wasn’t there he’d quit immediately, but no one needs to know that).
Malcolm missed the Conclave because he got sick (and then injured when he still tried to keep working and fainted), and he is PISSED about it. It’s not that he wanted to become Pope or anything, but he was certainly hoping to influence the results. Hopefully the new Pope will be old so that he can tough it out until the next Conclave… wait, who’s Vincent Benitez?
look! it’s malcolm sassing & channeling david lynch!!
i know that peter is a david lynch fan from his inspiration of shirt-buttoned-up-to-the-top style & saying the soundtrack to his life would be “song to the siren” by this mortal coil, a song repeated many times in lost highway (1997) by david lynch (which is my favourite film EVER).
but the question is, is malcolm?
well, maybe he is, since he, or his in the loop alter self, did once compared toby to eraserhead baby
anyways this means a lot to me as a david lynch/peter/malcolm super fan
Fandom: The Thick of It (TV), Taskmaster (UK TV) RPF
Relationships: Jamie MacDonald/Malcolm Tucker
Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Inspired by Taskmaster (UK TV), Fluff and Humor, Getting Together, Rated M for language
Summary:
“Hey,” the man in tartan said, slightly bouncing on his feet and with a smile that looked more like a snarl with all his teeth baring out. “I’m Jamie. Jamie MacDonald.”
Malcolm shook his hand, and connected Jamie to the comedian from the stand-up clips he had come across in the past year ... his eyes gleaming wide, a raw excitement unconcealed, sparkling in his expression.
For those who missed the announcement post, this is a casual fanweek for any kind of fanwork at any skill level, running from the 24th to the 30th of November. That's next week!! As promised in the original post, here are the final details (below the cut):
AO3 Collection
For any fics you may wish to post, the collection is here: https://archiveofourown.org/collections/ttoifanweek2025. You can also tag your works with #ttoifanweek2025.
Plaintext Prompt List
Monday, 24th: Phone Call or The Government.
Tuesday, 25th: Throwback or The Opposition/Coalition.
Wednesday, 26th: Supermarket or The Civil Service.
Thursday, 27th: Business Trip or Journalists.
Friday, 28th: Emergency or Favourite Location.
Saturday, 29th: Home or Favourite Ship.
Sunday, 30th: Free Space or Any Side Character.
FAQ
I can only take part in one or two prompts. Is that okay?
Totally fine! Participate as much or as little as you like.
I'm busy during the event so I won't be able to upload anything until after it's over. Can I still participate? Alternatively, I am reading this several weeks, months or years after the end of the event. Can I still participate?
Yes! Although the official run of the event is the last week of November 2025, late entries (no matter how late) are totally fine. The aim of this week is to get people to make stuff and talk about ttoi: participation is always welcome.
I'm seeing this before the start of the event. Can I start posting now?
I guess you can, but it would be far better if you waited to post until after the start date. Patience!
I suck at/don't enjoy doing any kind of traditional "art" type of fanwork, such as fanart or fanfiction. How can I participate?
Although this an event for absolutely any skill level, so don't be discouraged if you think you're bad at something, this is also an event for absolutely any type of fanwork. Like reading fanfiction? Try making a podfic! Enjoy analysing the show? Try writing that up as meta! Have headcanons about some of the characters or events? Try posting about them! Saw something that reminded you of the show? Try taking a photo of it! Have a silly joke about some aspect of the show? Bung it in the tag! The world's your oyster. Alternatively, anyone and everyone else participating in the event would absolutely welcome some nice words said about their work. Leaving comments and tags will doubtless be very much appreciated.
Are there any restrictions on the contents of what I post?
I can't really stop you. Obviously your work should be at least faintly related to at least one of the provided prompts. Tumblr will be annoyed if you break their terms of service, which will be your main restriction. Please put anything tumblr-acceptable but risque/gory behind an appropriate mature content tag. It would also be preferable if you tagged for any flashing lights that may be present in your work, and if you could add image descriptions where relevant.
Can I post AI-generated content?
Again, I can't really stop you, but I'd rather you didn't. I feel it's against the spirit of the thing.
Can I post things outside of tumblr and ao3?
Go for it! While tumblr is still the intended home of this event, I'm sure ttoi fans on other websites would be excited to see fanworks for it (and then they might participate, meaning even more ttoi fanworks! Double win!). If you want, you can always link to your posts on other sites in a post on tumblr.
I have more questions.
Feel free to get in contact with me in DMs, through asks (I have anons on if you're shy) or in the comments/replies of this post.
As part of my ongoing project to pull the ttoi fandom kicking and screaming back into semi-activity by any means necessary, I'm very excited to announce The Thick of It Fanweek 2025!!
Running from the 24th to the 30th of November, this is a casual fanweek for any kind of fanwork at any skill level. Fanart, meta, oneshot, headcanon list, drabble, fan edit/amv, quick doodle on the back of a receipt, miraculously completed 50k fic... the world is your oyster! There's no requirement to commit beforehand, no signups and no need to complete all the prompts; just take part in any of the days that take your fancy and post about it on tumblr with the tag #ttoifanweek2025. And, if you're busy during that week or if you're seeing this in, say, 2034, late entries are totally fine!
I'll put out more detailed information a week before the event starts, including an FAQ, a plaintext prompt list and (hopefully, if I can figure it out in time) an ao3 collection for any fics written as part of this event. Please consider taking part and sharing this around with anyone you think might want to join, and feel free to DM me or drop an ask if you have any questions! :)
Fic: Amicus Mortis, post-show, incredibly depressing, Malcolm/Jamie but other pairings mentioned. MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH is the entire premise (not of either of them).
This isn’t going to make me seem a better person. Set about nine years after Series 4.
stormborns
kaledo-art
prguitarman
baratheonpilled
izzy806
areudirty
andulkaphoto
turnnoffyourmind
vaporwave
