about me chiara speaking 🗣️ but you can call me chia ! ( 18 y/o mess — her — proud entp! — capricorn — nerd in love with emos and nerds — italian — exhausted student — cringe, horny and brainrotted :p — i relate on a spiritual level to yuji itadori and reo mikage, they're me i am them — i write for fun and most definitely don't have a schedule )
about the content mostly fluff, emotional damage caused by my clear mental instability, hurt/comfort, hurt/no comfort, angst, tension, reader inserts, ships, no ocs (yet), headcanons, aus, smaus, scrabbles, NO SMUT i cannot write smut for the life of me 😢 (maybe one day i’ll try), all the underage characters are aged up unless specified ! (fandoms: jujutsu kaisen, chainsaw man, blue lock, the apothecary diaries(more incoming)).
rules be respectful and remember to check the cws and tws! DO NOT COPY OR STEAL ANY OF MY WORKS ! if you do, you will be found and dealt with (trust). request anything, give feedbacks, criticize, idc but interact!!!!!
fun fact “meraki” (my @) means to do something with your soul, creativity; to put something of yourself in your work.
cw: boyfriendsbrother!rin x f!reader, badboyfriend!sae x f!reader — CHARACTERS ARE AGED UP! cheating but make it hot, emotional neglect (and ofc it's sae), rin itoshi is a menace to society, reader has questionable morals and zero self-respect (we love her tho), sibling rivalry deluxe edition™, rage baiting as a love language, phone sex??? kinda, voyeurism if you squint, subtle exhibitionism, dry humping, getting caught, fingernail marks and bruises, non-violent strangling, swearing, really horny people, suggestive content but not full-on NSFW, intentional lowercase
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boyfriendsbrother!rin has always been quiet.
quietly annoying.
you and sae have been together for a few months now. he is a good boyfriend.
well, sort of.
good enough to hold the door open for you, but not enough to actually acknowledge your presence. he always had something in his mind, and god forbid his girlfriend wanted to spend some quality time with him.
what could be worse than that? being invisible to your own boyfriend?
his brother making fun of you.
rin itoshi was a pain in the ass.
at the dinner table, when sae brought you home to meet his family, rin smirked, that evil grin appeared every time sae — purposely or not — straight up ignored your comments like they didn’t matter. like they didn’t even happen. like you weren’t even there.
his mom noticed, she gave you an understanding look, like she was silently saying “i’m sorry, he’s like this. get used to it.”
and you intended to. hell, you had to.
you’ve had your eyes on sae for the longest time, his teal eyes and stoic demeanor, his otherworldly talent, the ambition that you admired so much. you finally managed to get him, and now what? were you supposed to leave him just because he wasn’t showering you with affection like you’d hoped?
that's childish.
your friends told you, ”get over it. you’ve been wanting for that man for how long?”.
and they were right.
getting over it? somewhat doable. but those looks rin kept giving you? hell, straight up hell.
he was the worst part of the day. never said a word — his eyes did all the talking. laughing at you when sae wasn’t looking. shaking his head in disbelief whenever his brother ignored your flirting as he passed by.
on a random friday at the itoshi household, the rage and embarrassment you had been bottling up for months hit you like a tidal wave. you had to do something.
and of course – you did.
it started as pure rage-bait.
you began purposely leaving sae’s bedroom door open just enough for rin to see you two making out. you'd never been that touchy with sae, but now? now you were overdoing it. hands in his hair. love marks.
it shouldn’t have been abnormal for a couple, but with sae it was.
still — he was a man, so of course he didn’t complain.
the thing is, your back was always facing the door. you couldn’t really tell if your plan was working. the only way to know was to keep doing it until rin gave you a sign.
so you kept going, week after week, until it became a routine.
still, rin gave you nothing but those same judgmental looks whenever you were in the same room.
sae did loosen up a little. he let you hold his hand at the table. but still nothing from rin.
he let you kiss him in front of his family.
rin didn’t flinch.
it pissed you off. the way he’d only acknowledge you when sae did you wrong — ugh.
it had become a challenge, but you weren't winning, not at all.
you kept looking for rin’s gaze, you felt disappointed when he wasn’t at dinner or when his door stayed shut and you couldn’t put on your little act.
it was exhausting.
one night, sae actually tried to be affectionate — kissing you, touching you, his mouth on your jaw, neck, collarbone. but you were still, distracted, frowning. wondering why rin wasn’t reacting like you wanted him to.
you turned your head to face sae, whose mouth was still on your skin.
you just had the best idea ever.
you straddled him. his hands gripped your hips, and you moved slowly, grinding against him. you tugged at his hair and kissed him, tongue desperate, angry. you kept moving on his crotch, waiting for him to do exactly what you were hoping.
he did.
whimpers slipped from his lips, and a grin spread across your face. there was no way you were letting rin miss this. you pulled your phone from your back pocket, turned slightly, and typed in three letters:
r-i-n.
you called his number, the ringtone echoed from the other room for a few seconds. then it stopped. he either picked up or hung up, you were so hoping for the first but you couldn't know yet.
so you kept going, louder and louder.
when you and sae stopped, the room was silent. his hair was messy, your neck bruised, breaths ragged, and the sheets a disaster. you reached for your phone — the call was still on.
he didn’t hang up.
sae got up and left, probably for the bathroom. you didn’t care about his sudden burst of touchiness. all you cared was about rin.
rin, listening.
rin, hearing you and his brother like that for twenty minutes straight.
he didn't say a word, he waited 30 seconds and then hung up. it was a win, right?
but once again, not a single word from him.
so. fucking. infuriating.
the plan didn't work out like you wanted it to, and for the next couple of weeks you started avoiding your boyfriend, making lame excuses every time. he barely reacted, just replied with an ’ok’ when you canceled your plans. three weeks passed like that.
when the fourth rolled around, you finally decided to face him. you went to his place again. the thought of seeing rin made your face heat up instantly. you weren’t ready for his fucking little smirks.
the house was empty. the itoshi parents weren’t home. as usual, sae led you to his room.
you weren’t in the mood, so you put on a movie and chatted a bit. eventually, sae dozed off. the movie ended. the silence was deafening. you were scrolling through your socials when you heard it.
a bed creaking like crazy from across the hallway.
oh.
oh.
that son of a bitch.
you were fuming. forced to listen to rin fuck someone senseless while your boyfriend snored.
but what hit you hardest wasn’t the rage — it was the jealousy.
you were jealous.
god. you wished it was you.
so desperate to get something — anything — out of him, you stormed out of sae’s room and banged on rin’s door. didn’t even care if there was a girl inside.
he opened it with a smug grin on his face.
«took you long enough,» he said.
huh?
your face must’ve said it all, because he kept going.
«to stop acting like a child.»
«like a child? are you out of your mind? you're the one who–»
«called you while making out with my brother? yeah, no. that was you.»
«no point in denying it, huh?»
you shrugged. he stared straight through you, his teal eyes were darker than usual and you felt so small under his gaze.
«sae’s not good for you.»
now, that took you off guard.
«excuse me?»
you pushed him inside and slammed the door behind you.
«you,» you said, poking his chest, «have. no. say. in. my. relationship.»
each word was a push. he didn’t break eye contact. you pushed until his back hit the closet. he grabbed your finger.
you were dangerously close. your body, your mind — spiraling. you heart thundered in your chest. his gaze made your knees weak. he grabbed your wrist, pulling you in.
«you're so incredibly unhappy,» he whispered, «you made him moan just so i could hear.»
his breath fanned your lips. you tried to pull back, but his grip was too tight. too intoxicating. you leaned in without meaning to, eyes flicking from his to his lips.
he smirked. he noticed.
«you piss me off. so fucking much. i want to strangle you.» you whispered.
«i’d enjoy that.»
that – that was your last straw.
you freed yourself from his hold and grabbed the back of his neck, crashing your lips onto his. he grabbed your thighs and you jumped, legs wrapping around his waist. he kissed you like he was starving, tongue deep, humming into your mouth.
he carried you to his bed, laid you down and caged you underneath him. he paused and took a good look at you.
swollen lips. eyes glassy with desire. perfect. and to think his lukewarm of a brother had denied you affection so long that you started craving his.
him, — so fucking pathetic that he faked having a girl over just to get your attention. so pathetic that he kept baiting you, just to see you chase his gaze instead of sae’s. so pathetic that he stayed on that call, imagining it was him pulling those moans from your pretty mouth.
the sole thought of his brother being responsible of those lewd sounds drove him insane. he let that anger loose on your skin. his hands explored your body like they needed to memorize it. his nails sank into your thighs, and when you whimpered he lost it.
you were so goddamn gorgeous beneath him. loud. desperate. all for him.
his mouth moved to your neck — the same place sae had left his marks. he felt disgusted, he had to fix that.
rin kissed, sucked, bit — determined to erase it all. to show you what it meant to be wanted. to leave proof that it was him making you feel this way.
and you didn’t stop him.
god, did you even care if sae caught you?
«rin…» his name sounded like a sin on your tongue. your moans were music. fucking music.
you grabbed him by the neck and pulled him into another kiss.
«feisty.»
he breathed against your lips.
«you were made for me, not him.»
«shut up.» you tightened your grip on his neck, he moaned into your mouth. fuck, was he driving you insane.
more, more, more. you needed more.
and rin wanted to give it to you.
he stood up and unbuckled his belt, eyes locked with yours until the lights flicked on.
you didn’t even flinch, too far gone. he threw his belt at the door, but when it fell it didn't make a sound.
instead, it... coughed?
«i’ll leave you to it.»
sae, holding rin’s belt and leaning on the doorframe. he closed the door behind him. calm. cold.
you and rin froze, staring at each other in disbelief.
cw: aki x gn!reader, hair mention (??), emotional damage™, hurt/comfort (minus the comfort), aki being aki, bittersweet everything, intentional lowercase
a/n: this is my very first time writing and posting a fanfic in english (i’m from the pizza pasta mamma mia country), so any constructive criticism or feedback is more than welcome! i’m also not great with the whole “aesthetic” thing, so feel free to drop any suggestions for that too!
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childhoodbestfriend!aki who you were almost 100% sure forgot about you. you were best friends in elementary school and middle school, you were the only one he’d talk to.
childhoodbestfriend!aki who was utterly obsessed with you, but wouldn't show. all he’d really do was keep you close, listening to you rambling about whatever and scoffing at you in an unpleasant manner, secretly enjoying every single sound coming out of your mouth and hating himself whenever you would shut up because of his fucking evil mouth. he didn't mean to.
childhoodbestfriend!aki who didn't even show up at the airport when you had to leave for europe with your parents. your dad was a businessman, it wasn't your fault, but aki made you feel like it was.
childhoodbestfriend!aki who was left traumatized by the gun devil. you and your whole family were safe, but you just felt something happened to him. so you acted on it. it didn't take long to find out he enrolled in the public safety division.
childhoodbestfriend!aki who thought about you every single day, he'd hold onto a strand of your hair that had gotten stuck in a button of his old school uniform jacket. he'd cling onto the memories of you and the sound of your voice that slowly and painfully started to fade away.
childhoodbestfriend!aki who decided to make a contract with the fox devil solely because it reminded him of your eyes. how pathetic, he'd always repeat that to himself.
childhoodbestfriend!aki who rushed to rescue a civilian from some fuckass devil he couldn't even name now. the civilian had hair like yours, which doesn't mean anything — it could've been anyone.
childhoodbestfriend!aki who aggressively grabbed your shoulder to make you turn to face him. so you did. stared into his deep blue eyes that were paralyzed by the shock of seeing you after such a long time.
childhoodbestfriend!aki who would recognize your fox eyes everywhere. he held onto those strands of hair so tightly that now combing his calloused fingers through your hair while looking at your face seemed like an hallucination.
childhoodbestfriend!aki who would crumble and cry on your chest, sobbing like never before.
«i’m sorry. i’m so fucking sorry, y/n»
the floor was finally still, the devil had been killed. aki was holding the fabric of your shirt so tightly you thought it was going to rip, just like the bones and flesh keeping your heart from jumping out of your chest.
you couldn't believe your eyes, you’d tried to reach out to him, had been silently watching him from afar and now he was here — trembling in your arms.
«i regret everything. i regret not telling you how much you meant to me, not coming to the airport that day, being always so cold. i missed you so fucking much, i–»
he just kept sobbing and apologizing, and you couldn't manage to find the right words, so you just caressed his face and held him as tight as you could.
«it’s– it’s okay, aki. i missed you too. i’m here now.»
he got up, rubbing his eyes, all red and puffy, looking exactly like he did as a child, crying over a broken toy.
he brought his hand, cold and sweaty, to your cheek, warm and soft. you just smiled at him, mimicking an it's okay with your mouth.
a woman with an eye patch appeared, crushing the bubble you and aki found comfort in.
«oh, aki. there you are.»
he immediately stood up to face the woman.
«i found another civilian, call an ambulance for the survivors.»
he left without even looking back at you, leaving you with the eye-patched woman called himeno. she gave you an understanding smile, almost as if she knew exactly what had just happened.
«are you hurt?»
you shook your head.
«i’ll tell aki.»
you smiled back, left on your own, parting ways with himeno. with a lump in your throat, you left aki behind. that was the closure you wanted, but he wasn't who you needed.
you had always been hoping to find him again someday, but you had moved on from your old life. you had a partner that you loved so much, thrived in school and were now looking for a job. your family was still in europe, that wasn't home.
you just wanted closure from the only person you ever loved unconditionally, even from a distance, and that was it, wanting more would've only made you cling onto the past, just like aki did — he always did.