Alright sugar Betches. I’ve been observing and trying to stay as quiet as I can. However, I think that to continue to do so would be a disservice to some of the genuine ladies on here who have been trying to research so they know what to expect from the bowl.
First and foremost, this is my opinion. I welcome respectful discourse and debate. However, if you’re going to try and call me every b*tch wh*re etc in the book because you disagree,or even worse, threaten me, then you will be blocked and deleted with a quickness.
One of the number one questions that get asked upon entering the bowl is, “Can I be a platonic sugar baby and how do I go about it?”
To answer, YES. There IS such thing as a platonic sugar baby. A TRUE platonic SD/SB arrangement is difficult to find. Not impossible, of course, but they’re not just falling out of the sky.
Here is my personal story: I have a profile on AM. I start talking to a man, lets call him “C”. As we are talking, we get to the part of what are we both looking for. So I asked him. What is your expectation for this relationship/arrangement if we move forward? And like many, he goes “Meeting up for dinners or lunch. Getting together and doing fun things. And hopefully cuddling.” After that, I ask him again, “Just cuddling?” and he says “Yes”. Fast forward to a about a week later where we meet in person. We talk, we laugh, we eat (Well, I eat). And he asks me, “So, what do you think?”And this is where I ask again, “What are you hoping for? You said there was no sexual expectation aside from cuddling, are you sure about that?” and this is how he responds, “ Honestly, I’m just really lonely. I have no one to really go to lunch with or just get out and do things with. I go from home to work and back again. Would I like to have sex with you, yes! But I am completely fine with it being nothing more than just lunch or dinner or going out on my boat.” In response to that, “And you’re still fine with providing financial gifts even though we will not be having sex?” Him: “Yes. I knew what I was getting into signing up for that type of site and I understand that the incentive for young women is the financial component, I am okay with that.”
We seemed to be on the same page and made plans for the next time we wanted to meet. To this day, “C” is still is one of my SDs. We have a great friendship. Is the allowance perfect? No. But we have an agreement that we are both knowingly happy with.
I say all that to say this: Part of the idea of an “arrangement” is the fact both parties willingly agree to the terms. As you can see, from the get go we established that there will not be any sexual activity. I confirmed this with him three times, so there would be no surprises or accusations of lying later. But, there are women out there who are using tactics that I personally would say are intentionally dishonest. It is one thing to say, “We will be intimate when I am comfortable with you”, you have that right. It is completely another to say,” We will be intimate when I am comfortable with you,” with the full intention of leaving once you realize he will no longer give you gifts without intimacy. That’s being dishonest. You’ve given the impression that something will happen when really, you never intend it to, and he doesn’t know that. Which means he’s agreed to terms with certain expectations. When you use the latter, you take what is a reasonable request and then use that knowing he would not agree to your terms otherwise. Never giving the other party the opportunity to willfully agree to the terms. There is a name for that, it’s called rinsing. And in my opinion, rinsing and being a platonic sugar baby ARE NOT THE SAME THING. And the worst part is, the women who are doing this are ruining things for other potential sugar babies. I have an SD who was originally unwilling to give an allowance because of two previous women who did that exact same thing. We eventually did build enough trust to where he knows I will not do that, but its sad that it has gotten to that point! This has been said numerous times but we talk about Salts and Real Sds and why they make what seem to be outlandish requests. It’s because there are women out there who have made them have to be that way. Real Salts exist, no doubt about that. The ones who fully intend to under deliver and lowball. But can you really blame the genuine ones who have been burned when they become that way?
The point is mutually beneficial. However, it cannot be mutually beneficial when one party is expecting something, being told that it will happen, and then never getting it. You would never keep meeting with a guy when he says he will give an allowance and never delivers it, would you? The same applies in reverse. It’s about being respectful of what you two agreed upon. There’s nothing wrong with being a platonic SB. But make sure your SD knows that that’s the agreement and expectation so he has the opportunity to decide for himself whether to leave or stay.
blakekathryn
yousharknotpass
izzy806
