Brother: Have you seen the gardening sheers? I want to trim the apricot tree.
Sister: When the fuck did we get an apricot tree?!
noise dept.
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
The Stonewall Inn
sheepfilms
todays bird
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
Keni

shark vs the universe
Cosmic Funnies

if i look back, i am lost
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
RMH
Mike Driver

bliss lane

Game Changer & Make Some Noise
Sweet Seals For You, Always

roma★

No title available
seen from Nigeria
seen from Colombia

seen from Australia
seen from Singapore
seen from Colombia
seen from Philippines

seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from Croatia

seen from United States

seen from France
seen from United States
seen from Singapore

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Russia

seen from United States
seen from Greece
seen from Mexico

seen from Netherlands
@middlesiblingprblems
Brother: Have you seen the gardening sheers? I want to trim the apricot tree.
Sister: When the fuck did we get an apricot tree?!
Student 1: I am not being an academic weapon right now.
Student 2: I've had 3 mental breakdowns today, so I'm going to give up and go to bed.
Student 1: Call you up in three hours?
Student 2: Please and thank you.
My 'invisible friend' was my cousin. She wasn't invisible. We were just the same age, so we did everything together, went everywhere together, threw fits if they didn't have a seat at the table, and to mess with the other kids we pretended to talk to each other when the other wasn't around.
I dunno, France is a weird one too.
what motherfucker pointed to australia??
Gearing up to fight Western imperialism.
We're just going to gloss over the fact of how many pointed to China?
I would like everyone to know that I already use this on my youngest step sibling who has just entered his teens while I am already in my 20s.
Him: Please, you can't tell me that you never went to parties when you were my age!
Me: I didn't.
Him: I can't help if you weren't cool enough!
Me: You realise that when I was your age, I was legally not allowed to leave the house without good reason, right? Right?
Funny how a commitment to a cat lasts longer than most marriages.
It's actually pretty clever and logical.
Imagine memorising this? I would kill myself before I got to 1000.
My brother was the youngest and only son. He got parents who went to all his games, who bought him what he wanted, who doted on him, who made him the centre of their world. He never understood why I had a bad relationship with them.
Until they up and left.
And suddenly, the version of my parents that I knew, absent, unkind, selfish, narcissistic, made sense. Suddenly, he understood.
But like... what are the rules? If they fight me, does that count as my fight for the quarter, too? What about hair pulling, biting, nails? Can I use weapons?
The universal law of humanity: if there is a hopscotch, you must hop the scotch.
shipping characters who are just friends in canon is more than okay but what’s annoying is when people take screenshots of them touching and say “friends don’t do that!”. i hate to break it to you but friends do hug and hold hands and cuddle. saying ‘friends don’t do that’ is reenforcing the idea that physical touch is reserved for lovers
“There is nothing platonic about this” Nah I can write an essay over how platonic that is.
"They are in love" Sit and watch me writing a book saga about how they love each other platonicaly because this type of love. Is. Not. Less. LOVE!
My friend broke up with her boyfriend because apparently they're "too touchy" with their friends. Bro, you haven't seen us be touchy with each other.
yeah, house doesn’t actually like cameron you can clearly tell from the way he immediately stops and looks up at cuddy when she tells him cameron was worried about him.
I am not taking a risk
Not risking it pals
U know what I want potato of luck
Damn right I’m reblogging. See previous post re wrath of whatever from high atop the thing.
Waiting for post grad acceptance so I'm not fucking risking!
My first gen z experience in the workplace:
Me (21): *Makes small talk*
Boss's Boss (38): *Makes a joke*
Me: (thinking we're talking casually) *Makes a joke back*
Boss's Boss: *thinks I'm serious* Oh, no. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for it to be taken seriously. I'm really sorry to have offended you!
Me: Don't worry. It's not that deep.
Boss's Boss: ...
Me: ...
Boss's Boss: What?
Me: ...uhm... please don't make me explain that.
It doesn't seem like a now problem.
Or
It doesn't feel like a me problem.
Living alone with your siblings.
Expectations:
3 attempted murders a day, constant fighting over clothing, no dishes being done, fighting over laundry.
Reality:
Healthy communication, constant sharing, equal division of chores to what you bring into the house, silence.