Thou hast found my blog, and I apologize heartily @midnaofthetwili - Tumblr Blog

need a full body massage a margarita 400mg of ibuprofen a plate of brownies at least an hour in a jacuzzi and 20,000 dollars cash

neon-slime

reblog to give a mutual a full body massage a margarita 400mg of ibuprofen a plate of brownies at least an hour in a jacuzzi and 20,000 dollars in cash

dailyfigures

Waddle Dee & Meta Knight & Kirby & Waddle Doo ; Kirby ☆ Re-Ment

dogwise

junji itō was so right when he said this

dogwise

this too

froginakettle

junji ito was right about everything actually

simpsons-latino

say-prettyy-pleasee

This is Money Marge. Reblog for a miracle of finances to come to you

🙏🏾💰💵

lemonsharks

Please money marge, send me a job callback

wolfythewitch

How does this keep happening to me

kallulily

🧡⭐️🍎💖🟠✨

king-k-ripple

reallyreallyreallytrying

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

doubleca5t

An actual World Heritage Post

dykecosette

how does this post not have a million notes but anyone online can quote it

definitelynotlazav

one week until ten years of Spiders Georg

yd12k

evelynquack

HOLY SHIT IT CAME ACROSS MY DASH NATURALLY!!!

beggars-opera

Rocky Horror is turning 50 next month and people still act like being gay was invented by Ellen in 1997

beggars-opera

But honestly! Renowned French poet Théophile de Viau wrote the poetic ode to King James titled “The Duke of Buckingham,” containing the immortal lines “One man fucks Monsieur le Grand de Bellegarde/Another fucks the Comte de Tonnerre/And it is well known that the King of England/Fucks the Duke of Buckingham” exactly 400 years ago and people still act like being gay was invented by Oscar Wilde in 1890

hugh-lauries-bald-spot

Niankhkhnum and Khnumhotep were buried together in the 25th century BC and people still act like being gay was invented by renowned French poet Théophile de Viau 400 years ago

insufficientdata

Gilgamesh and Enkidu “loved each other like man and wife” in 2700 BC and ppl STILL act like being gay was invented by Niankhkhnum and Khnumhotep in the 25th century BC

lychgate

unga bunga had rough anal sex with oog 65,000 years ago

guerrillatech

richardjager-deactivated2023010

“Autism hasn’t got anything to do with it. He’s an asshole because he’s got about 70 different silver spoons shoved straight up his ass.”

-My Aunt Debbie, discussing Elon Musk after several glasses of Chianti.

akiyty

Aunt Debbie is right and she should drink up and say so

drst

Tumblr would like to buy Aunt Debbie several more rounds.

short-wooloo

Raise your glass in Aunt Debbie's Honor

cowboyscrypt

i love my switch its like an animal to me. shhhh sweet pink and green creature download my software

cowboyscrypt

AND SLAM IN THE BACK OF MY DRAGULAAAAA 🤘🤘🤘🤘🤘

bunibelles

Garden Kirby 🍅🌱✨~

koloocheh

forget about touching grass, i need to touch THE SEA I NEED TO GO INTO THE WATER I NEED TO DIVE INTO THE SEA!!!!!!!!!!!!

koloocheh

I NEED TO GO IN THERE ⬇️⬇️⬇️‼️‼️‼️

trickstertime

Lol. Everyone in the notes freaking out like 'I live by the sea, don't jump in, it dangerous'.

Like, guys, guys, listen, you don't understand. They don't mean... They want to be... Listen, ok, I grew up on the sea, I've been through hurricanes on trawlers and gale force 9 storms crewing tallships. I've seen enormous waves absolutely destroy boats. I've been caught in riptides while scuba diving and felt the complete powerlessness of it. The sea will absolutely annihilate you, consume you, never give up your body, and not even notice.

I know the power of the sea better than most, however, I know exactly what they mean. Sometimes you see it churning with unfathomable power and all you want is to just get in the sea and have it absolutely fuckin blast you clean. Like sandblast your fuckin soul. Fuckin powerwash your bones clean. Ya know?