Life is so much nicer when you realize you can block people if you aren't enjoying having their posts appear on your feed
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
Xuebing Du

Kiana Khansmith

pixel skylines

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Game of Thrones Daily
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2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year
h
The Bowery Presents
macklin celebrini has autism
Sade Olutola

titsay

Jar Jar Binks Fan Club
Claire Keane

bliss lane

@theartofmadeline
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roma★
Mike Driver

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@mildlyannoyedcaterpillar
Life is so much nicer when you realize you can block people if you aren't enjoying having their posts appear on your feed
The longer it takes for this to come across your dash the funnier it is
Which will fade first? Memories of the Area 51 "raid", or memories of Internet Explorer?
Oh my god....
@crabussy @planefood can you confirm?
#YUP fact checked by TRUE AOTEAROA DWELLERS
I saw someone use the fact that Buck said he wasn't in love with Eddie in 8x11 as decisive evidence that Buck was not in love with Eddie, and like, my dude, did you watch the rest of the episode?
There’s a liquor store near my house that seems to be run exclusively by frat boys. They lovingly curate these bags, which I browsed today while “Oops I Did It Again” played through the store speakers. This is art to me, there is beauty everywhere for those with eyes to see it
The update everyone has been waiting for….
everytime i see this it makes me want to buy from them exclusively
So, hear me out..
I think Eddie should be the one to make the first move.
Buck deserves to be chosen
And Eddie deserves to choose what he wants for himself
Because honestly, I don’t think Buck would ever let himself see Eddie as an option. Not because he doesn’t love him, but because he has too much to lose. Their friendship, their family, everything they’ve built together.
Buck would be terrified of ruining the best thing that’s ever happened to him, so I think Eddie would have to be the one to make it clear first.
pretty girls who get so close riding you that they freeze up completely. hips going still. face crumpling. "i'm gonna cum i don't want to cum yet i'm not done—"
hands finding their hips. starting to move them slowly.
"keep going."
"i can't— i'm too close i'm gonna—"
"i know." moving their hips faster. not slower. "keep going anyway."
a devastated sound. hips moving despite themselves now, chasing and fighting it at the same time. "please— please i'm right there please—"
reaching down between us. thumb finding their clit.
the whimper they let out at the contact.
"no— no no no please that's too much please i'm gonna cum please—"
not stopping. working slow circles while their hips keep moving. feeling them get impossibly closer. feeling them try to still themselves and moving them again.
"you're not done." i remind them. "keep riding."
"i can't i can't i can't—" crying tears now. hips moving frantically despite every protest. body completely overriding everything their mouth is saying. “please let me cum please i’ve been so good please—”
"not yet." thumb still moving. steady. "you said you weren't done. so finish what you started."
a sob. hips working desperately. thighs shaking with the effort of taking all of it while i keep rubbing slow deliberate circles and refuse to give them what they're begging for.
"please—" barely a word anymore. "please please i can't hold it please—"
watching them fall apart trying to hold on. watching them lose every single battle with their own body while i stay completely unbothered underneath them.
making them earn every second of it.
The girl i like isn't into me back. Because she's not into ANYONE. Which is so respectable and valid. Also she's amazing but hey. I want our friendship more than a romantic relationship yk?
God I'm such a useless lesbian
FOOD DISCOURSE: reblog with ur opinions on guacamole, olives, mango, hummus, tomatoes, and cannolis
the worst writing crime you can ever commit in my opinion is watering down the dirty talk because you’re self-conscious that it sounds like it’s from a bad porno…..i cannot stress this enough……leave it alone. the moment you tell yourself he would not fucking say that you’re doomed. people will say almost anything if their dick is hard enough
i don’t know why this post blew up but absolutely incredible things happening in the tags.
Klance and sukka cross over because theyre both peak
I dont like**** oops
Okay but this is actually a really fun concept because people's voices often don't sound the same in recording as they do in their head. And people often find their recorded voice really off putting or weird. So what if, to each other, they sounds like what a recording of their own voice would sound like.
once I snorted a fat line of nuance and everything started depending. watch out
I laminated a paper towel
why does this have 31 thousand notes
You made it useless but also prevented it from the end it was predestined for.
But wait this is actually freaking me out though, it raises so many questions about the otherwise incomprehensible meaning of life as a collective whole versus personal sustenance and longevity
Imagine if one day you were given a choice: Become immortal and indestructible for eternity, unable to be harmed by anything ever again, and get to live forever.
However, in order to achieve that you must give up whatever your purpose in life is. Whatever it is that you were always meant to do, what you were supposed to contribute to the overall scheme and future of the life of the universe, your purpose… the whole reason you were even created, even born in the first place. You must give that up. You don’t know what that is. You’ll never know; But, regardless, you say yes.
Perhaps you assume you wouldn’t have made any sort of significant difference anyway. That butterfly effect theory or whatever they call it? Nah, you call bullshit. It doesn’t matter - you don’t matter, at least not to anything outside of your immediate connections - and it’ll all be fine, and you’ll just live forever with minimal (or maybe even no) consequences.
So, yay! You’re now immortal. You’ll never die or get hurt ever again. Wee!
But then, centuries and centuries later (not to mention that by this point you’ve gone through horrible heartbreak and misery and despair because every loved one you ever had, every friend you ever made, ever person you barely got to know, has passed away, died as you lived on long without them, helpless to do anything for them as you watched them perish, unable to ever go with them or ever see them again. But I digress), now, you learn you actually were important in the grand scheme of things. You were supposed to be a key factor in the world’s survival, long ago; but, because of the choice you made (immortality over individual purpose), you were never given the knowledge or awareness or resources or ability to save the world that you were always supposed to obtain, before you unknowingly made the wrongest choice to ever wrong.
Needless to say, you’ve fucked up big time.
The entire universe as we know it is destroyed soon after this horrifying revelation. It implodes, collapses in on itself, essentially forming a massive black hole or something. Stars, nebulae, galaxies, solar systems and planets, worlds and worlds of living people and things, and light-years of time and space and life, all sucked up into absolute, indefinite nothingness.
But you remain.
Just you. Floating amongst, spiraling around, rocketing through, suspended in… nothing. With a feeling of such unbelievable loneliness that your feeble brain can hardly perceive, can’t possibly hope to comprehend. Not only are you the only living thing left, you don’t even have one inanimate object to keep you company. You have literally. Nothing. And you are literally nowhere. I mean, technically, you are now the universe - if it would bring you petty comfort to think about it that way. You. Only you. With nothing, no one, nowhere. Forever. And ever. And ever.
All because you thought you didn’t matter. That you had no real, meaningful purpose. That you could never possibly make a difference.
But you did. And now look what you’ve gotten yourself into, you silly nugget. You’re gonna be pretty bored and lonely for that eternity, huh?
Or maybe it was out of selfishness. Maybe this wasn’t because you felt useless, but because you simply only cared about prolonging your own life and nothing else. Hm.
The moral here? Be selfless, and always know and remember that you matter.
Or else, one day, you might destroy the universe. And be left to suffer, and be tortured horribly and endlessly by the void of nothingness that has consumed you. With no way to escape. Ever.
Other moral because I got sidetracked from my initial point - all things considered, would you choose longevity over purpose? Immortality over meaning?
OR, IDK, MAYBE SOME IDIOT JUST LAMINATED A STUPID PIECE OF PAPER TOWEL FOR NO GOOD REASON
AND MAYBE I SHOULDNT BE LOOKING FOR THE ANSWERS TO THE MEANING OF OUR SHORT, FRAGILE LIVES IN
A LAMINATED
PAPER
T OW E L
IDK MAN,
I D K
Write. A. Book.
What if I did write a book
and the pages of that book
were made out of
laminated
paper towels
I WASNT GONNA REBLOG UNTIL THAT LAST COMMENT
Okay but after seeing this I started doing it too and it’s amazing how many men I’ve run into bc they expected me to move
Gotta try it
I work (and walk) on a college campus. I’ve lost count of how many men I’ve smacked shoulders with.
Recently, I was standing outside my son’s classroom waiting to talk to his teacher. I stood on one side of the hallway, not even close to the center. At some point, a man came walking along. I was standing right in his path, but the hallway was empty, so I logically expected him to swerve around me. Instead he kept walking right toward me, got to me, and stopped, as if waiting for me to get out of his way. I didn’t; I just smiled politely at him. He finally walked around me, clearly annoyed that I hadn’t leapt out of his manly path.
Now I’m wishing I’d leapt aside, taken off my jacket and laid it on the floor before him, then bowed deeply and said, “My Liege!”
I also work at a college campus. I smack shoulders sometimes, but I find that if I stare straight ahead and follow the advice below, people get the heck out of the way.
Honestly this post changed how I carry myself when walking alone in public, or in a situation where I’m the one leading. People definitely move for the murder gaze.
Confirmed. I once had to rush back inside a convention hall as the con was closing in order to a retrieve a sick friend’s medication, and I didn’t understand why people in the crowd were jumping out of my way (literally—one guy vaulted a table) until I realized I was dressed as the Winter Soldier and doing the Murder Walk because that’s just how I walk in those boots. I got the meds, got out, and made a mental note.
I repeated the experiment later, wearing the boots but otherwise my usual clothing and mimicking the expression I thought I’d had at that moment. People parted like I was Charlton Heston.
I now wear that style of boots whenever possible. I recently had a man do a double-take as I walked by and ask me, politely, where I had served because I “looked like a soldier.” I’m not current or former military. I was wearing a flowy purple peasant top and looked as un-soldierlike as possible.
Moral of the story: wear comfortable shoes, square your shoulders, and walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America.
WALK LIKE YOU’VE BEEN SENT TO MURDER CAPTAIN AMERICA
It’s called the Murder Strut.
IT’S BACK!!!!!! I was searching for this to show my daughter the other day and couldn’t find it. I’m so glad IT’S BACK!! I will always reblog the Murder Strut!!
A guy on a bike went around me because he could tell I had no intention of moving. Thanks to this post.
One day and I bumped into a guy while doing the Murder Strut and he apologized to me even though I was the one who had bumped into him.
It works wonders.
In case you were wondering, yes you can do this in a wheelchair. Same look in your eyes and let ‘em know you will run them down. Just picture yourself in a sports car accelerating towards someone with the intention of flattening them.
If there’s anything more satisfying than watching Abled men leap out of my way when they realize I’m not moving for them, I can’t think of it atm.
Walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America.
Wheel like you’re gonna win the Indy 500 and don’t care how.
Your crutches are short swords; walk like you can see them buried in the bodies of anyone who crosses (in front of) you.
Tumblr: teaching women how to be Moses and part the fucking Red Sea with the power of their minds.
I had never seen these updates to the Patriarchy Chicken Game before and they are all a goddam DELIGHT
Patriarchy Chicken and The Murder Strut, dance names for the new millenium.
The headology on display here would make Granny Weatherwax proud.