For You (Zoro x Reader)
_____ Pairing: Zoro x Reader Summary: You take a life-threatening blow for Zoro in battle and he is marred with guilt. Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Descriptions of Injury and Blood, Mention of Death, Swearing [One Piece Masterlist] _____
Your limbs ache, breath coming in short and painful increments, but you can't seem to stop. More like you can't allow yourself to. Once again, your beloved crew was in battle with an opposing pirate crew, and it was proving very difficult to come to victory.
You had long since separated from Luffy but assumed he was still fighting in the distance with the rival Captain if the massive blows and faraway destructions were anything to go by. Your less battle-inclined crewmembers were even further from you, no doubt fighting subordinates of the adversary out of town. But you were one of the main combatants of the crew and thus were in the depths of a gruelling battle with formidable commanding officers of the enemy.
You remember last seeing Sanji a short time ago, but to your right, you can hear the impacts of your boyfriend's vicious swords as he fights his opponents. You found slight comfort in that; Zoro never strayed too far from you in battles. Despite his undying trust in your abilities, he found solace in the fact that he could support you if needed, his protective instincts flaring when it came to you.
"Is that all you've got?!"
You grimace and sidestep your opponent, who thinks he's got the upper hand, as you are momentarily lost in your thoughts. The impact of his blow trembles upon the Earth, but you feel yourself unfazed. You lift your weapon of choice, your prized axe, and it hums with unnatural energy.
"I could ask the same of you! Have you even landed a single blow?! "
You yell out, a mocking grin on your face despite the utter fatigue that fills you. The earlier battles you had won were catching up to you, and though your current opponent was stronger, he was still nothing you couldn't handle. Blood seeps from his skin and bruises litter his body, clear remnants of your earlier attacks vastly contrasting the way you appeared so unscathed.
You witness rage fill his features at your words as he swings wildly, his weird weapons flung carelessly in the air. He rushes towards you, but you grin, ready to deal the finishing blow. Your axe hums louder, energy pouring into it, and taking on a fighting stance, you react to your opponent's proximity. His incoherent shouts suddenly disappear as you slice through him in one swift movement, and he grunts when he hits the floor unmoving.
Your axe hums to silence once more, and you finally look around you, taking in a long-awaited breath. The battlefield was lost to destruction, and dozens of enemies lay static around you. You groan as you stretch your limbs idly, fighting the want to fall asleep right then and there. Though you were not hurt beyond the rare scrape or bruise, exhaustion threatened to pull you to the floor, and your vision blurred. Head sharply ringing, you shake it, more important things on your mind.
Your crew's safety.
Zoro.
Gritting your teeth, you force yourself to move. Though your boyfriend was more than, if not the most capable fighter next to Luffy, it didn't mean your worry was nonexistent. How could it be? Most times, your concern was through the roof. Your boyfriend: always overworking himself, always putting himself before the safety of the crew, always fighting the deadliest of enemies.
There's a shriek of a weapon in the distance, and a nearby blow, and your heart thumps a bit faster despite yourself. Pushing back debris, your muscles groan in protest, but you push through into an opening where you finally see a bed of green hair and three familiar swords. You witness sharp eyes flicker to you for a millisecond and the deranged smirk your boyfriend bears seems to grow, proud you have won your battles and satisfied you will be there to witness his own victory.
But you are not met with the same reassurance he seems to have.
Your boyfriend was drenched in what looked like blood... his blood. And when he turns, you see the remnants of a gash on the side of his chest, clearly from having been impaled by the weapon of one of the men he fought. Speaking of which, the opponent he fights now seems unnaturally powerful, towering over his form and with Zoro’s blood on his weapon. Still, you tried to hold onto your faith as you witnessed your boyfriend take on a familiar stance.
"Oni-giri!!"
The dark aura that surrounds him ignites, and even from a short distance away, you can see the fear envelop his opponent's eyes. Zoro slices through him easily, his blades in the air as blood is torn from his opponent, and he falls limp to the floor. You smile in relief that he too has won his battles and your boyfriend who seems more exhausted and injured than he usually is after battle finally sheathes his swords and turns to meet you.
You go to run to him, and his grin widens despite the way he holds onto his side, blood pouring onto his fingers. Adrenaline in his body seems to fade as he finds comfort in the fact you are safe and his battles are won.
"Hey babe, what took you so long?"
You roll your eyes as you approach, about to throw his words back at him, but your voice suddenly gets caught in your throat; your eyes pick up on strange movements just behind him. There is a glint of a weapon beyond your boyfriend's oblivious gaze. Maybe it is his fatigue after hours of constant battle, and blood loss making him less inclined to listen to his senses as he looks to you, but you know he does not see.
"ZORO!!"
Your scream ripples through the air, urging him to notice, but it is too late, the weapon - a sword - is aimed right at your boyfriend's back. Zoro's brows pull together as you approach, vision slightly askew from the brunt of earlier attacks, but he sees an emotion etched clearly on your face. Fear. His heart rate picks up, and lack of oxygen from over-exertion makes his mind hazy as he tries to figure out what troubles you. However, instead of running to him as he thought, you run into him hard, knocking him to the side.
Suddenly it is as though you are torn between numbness and agony.
Adrenaline courses through you as you feel an unbearable pain rip through your torso, nerves and muscles rippling against the cold intrusion of a sword. Though you had managed to push Zoro away from the man who stabbed you, you were now in his place and you had never felt such indescribable pain. Your limbs turn instantly rigid and your vision churns harshly, your body begging you to move away from the affliction. You can hear the scream of your name beneath the mocking laughter of the man who has just stabbed you.
"[Y/N]!!"
There is an instantaneous swing of a sword, and the blurred image of the enemy falls limp on your side before he can even dream of retrieving the weapon ingrained in your body. However, you feel your own body falter on your feet, and the world suddenly turns against your will, as you fall to your knees.
Zoro instantly reacts, unsettling fear penetrating his system and causing his usually sure hands to tremble as he catches you. Shock is all that fills his system, confounded about how quickly his reunion with you has turned into hell on Earth. His eyes are wild, searching your face and the weapon still ingrained in your body for an indication that this somehow wasn't reality; that he hadn't failed to protect you. But warmth fills his hands, your blood mingling with his own from earlier, and in its stead, your limbs start to lose their heat.
"[y-y/n]"
Zoro, still in such disbelief finds no words coming to him, vision still hazy now churning and causing sickness to fill in his gut. He is only brought to his senses when you let out a cry of pain, eyes squeezed tightly shut, nerves bristling within your body. Then, it is like new-found energy fills Zoro's system as he brings you into his arms, careful not to cause the weapon to move any deeper within you. Zoro reacts, cradling your form to his, limbs moving but only acting on sheer will, his mind still lost in terror.
"[y/n], stay with me, don't you die on me!"
He runs desperately looking around the clearing for any sort of help that may come to him, hoping for once that his horrible sense of direction is not the cause of your death. Your eye-sight blears, whimpering at the pain that slowly becomes too much for you to bear. Zoro looks back and forth between you and his surroundings, you try your best to concentrate on his face. Never had you seen your boyfriend so frantic, so far from composure. His stoic facade seems to unravel quickly at the desperation between his shouts, and the sharp way his eyes travel to your injury.
"Damn it! [y/n], don't- don't, keep your eyes open-"
You want to comfort him, to grant him peace of mind, but your body is pulling you to an easy escape from the pain that dulls your system. You don't know how much time has passed but you know it has only been a minute, and your vision starts to fade. Fear stumbles into you at the thought that you could actually die, right here and now. You witness Zoro's eyes widen at the sight of your mulled senses but you can no longer hear the words that slip desperately past his lips.
In a last attempt at goodbye, you lift a bloodied hand as high as you can and try pulling your lips upwards in what you know to be the smallest of smiles. Your bloodied hand smears Zoro's chest before all energy is lost to you and it falls limp.
"[Y/N]!!"
Amid your boyfriend yelling to you to keep your eyes open, your vision fades to black. And lost in his unfamiliar fear, Zoro does something he never thought he would do.
He yells for his crew.
He yells for you.
.....
Cold.
Cold is the air that surrounds Zoro as he witnesses Chopper close the door to the infirmary in a fit of worry and urgency. Blood still coats his hands where he held you, his own injuries neglected in the wake of your near-fatal ones. And for the first time in a long time, Zoro is rendered speechless, numb and motionless.
Luck is what saved him from prompt grief, but the chance that he could still lose you looms overhead.
In his franticity, a man he would usually be less than happy to see had heard his calls for help. Sanji. He had led you and Zoro quickly to aid. More luck had appeared in the unlikely presence of the Heart Pirates, their Captain, quickly taking you from him despite his protests and Chopper doing all he could to stabilise you. Now the weapon ingrained in you had finally been removed, blood prevented from vacating your body, and Chopper and Law worked hard to keep things that way.
Zoro is static as he still stares at the door, as though willing you to open it unscathed, alive and well, but his reality has now been turned in his head and he is left numb. He clenches and unclenches his fists, shock not allowing him to think, still in complete denial of the events that had happened though deep down he knows they have.
Your scream for his name, your smile morphing into a look of fear, his stupidity in letting down his guard, your harsh hands pushing him out of the way.
Why? Why why why... He was supposed to protect you and prevent even the smallest injuries from touching your skin, but now he was the reason you were on the brink of death. Why had you pushed him out of the way? Why had you insisted on saving him? He could've taken it, and even if he couldn't he would rather have died a hundred times than see this fate befall you.
A careful hand is placed on his shoulder, and Zoro's eyes turn, sharp and dark to its beholder.
Sanji looks grimly at the swordsman he usually argues with, unable to find many words to comfort him. But the crew were still scattered around the island, the only ones present apart from him being Chopper and Law who worked on you frantically.
"She'll be okay. [y/n]-san is strong."
Zoro growls low under his breath, shrugging off Sanji's hand though the cook does not seem to be fazed by his irritation. An anger sparks within Zoro, and though he knows that it is all for himself he turns to the cook with his unbridled rage.
"You don't know that cook!"
Sanji again does not flinch, but as he witnesses the green-haired swordsman's eyes flicker with a flurry of emotions, empathy clouds his vision. The crew had all been shocked to find out that you and Zoro were dating, Sanji more than crestfallen that you had been taken by the swordsman. But each day proved the amount of care you held for Zoro; the amount of love. And the swordsman could try to hide it all he wanted, but even ignorant crewmembers had seen how much gentler, how much softer Zoro was around you.
Always searching for you during and after battles. Always saving a spot for you at the dinner table. Always with his welcoming arms whenever you wanted to join him for a nap. His sweet caresses, his gentle care, his anger whenever a breath of an insult was muttered your way.
He watches as Zoro turns, unanchored now that you are no longer there to ground him and pulled back behind the strong walls you thawed. A fist flies through the air and through the wall opposite the infirmary, crackling and leaving a large hole as Zoro retrieves his fist.
"Fuck..."
Sanji says nothing as Zoro walks away, hoping beyond the Gods that you would be okay.
.....
A week.
A week had passed since Zoro had seen the glimmer of your open eyes or the smile that enlightened your features.
A week, and Zoro was yet to go into the room where you still lay unconscious.
He had remembered the sounds of the commotion that had taken place when other crewmembers had returned to the Sunny, shocked beyond belief to see one of their strongest friends on the brink of her death. Luffy had been almost inconsolable in his demanding to see you and make sure you were okay, but Zoro had not had the heart to go greet them. He stays, cooped up in the crow's nest, silent and with frigid images of you torturing his mind.
He found himself surprisingly grateful that Sanji had been there to answer the questions thrown about what had happened to you. It had made it more bearable when crewmembers had come to him in the room where he stayed unmoving, muttering comforts that blew over his head. Even his captain's words of determination that you would pull through did nothing to lift his head or his hope.
Now as the days mulled on, Zoro overworks himself if only to remove the image of you bloodied and harmed in his mind. He doesn't count the reps of swings he contends as he brings weights to the air and lowers them, never stopping his movement. Slowly his anger had chruned with remorse and an unbearable guilt.
He blamed himself.
Though he was angry early on at your carelessness and your thoughtless action to save him. That anger pointed to himself now, and he was much less forgiving of the things he held against himself. He had let his guard down, had lost himself to the relief of a battle he thought he'd won but had not finished off, and you had paid the price. Your hazy gaze and the blood that he just couldn't seem to rid of on his skin taunt him until sleep is fruitless and static silence, insufferable.
He should've been stronger, sharper, better.
There is a knock to the door, and the clatter of plates, and the swordsman knows that it is the crew's cook once more leaving food to quench a hunger he no longer cared for.
"Oi, Marimo. You need to eat, otherwise you'll be no use to [y/n]-san once she wakes up."
Zoro doesn't reply to the cook, and he doesn't heed his words. If. Zoro wants to say. If she wakes up. But what if she doesn't? What then? Zoro knows already the pain of losing someone close to him, but you? He doesn't know if he would ever recover. He doesn’t know if he could ever let someone in again, if he could continue on pretending like the dream of you and him wasn't lost to the blade of a faceless enemy.
If he could pretend he didn't fail.
"The crew are worried. Just... think of what [y/n]-san would say if-"
The cook seems to cut himself off, and Zoro does not see but Sanji's eyebrows are pulled together, expression dismal and worried for you. The Sunny was much too quiet recently. Without your joyous banter, teasing remarks, comforts and laughter, there is a hole in the crew that cannot seem to be filled. Crewmembers were sullen, and quiet and even Luffy had resigned to waiting in stillness for you to wake. The whole crew adored you and missed you, and they had not seen your boyfriend much since the incident.
Zoro's movements falter at the cook's words as the weights in his grasp come to a sharp halt. He hears Sanji's footsteps step away, but in place of him, tears threaten to cascade down the swordsman's face. It seems a week of denial and regret has reduced him to vulnerability. He uses the back of his hand to rub his face irritably, releasing his weights and gritting his teeth harshly. And all of a sudden, he is filled with a different type of remorse.
He had made his crew worry. He had yet to see you.
He was a coward.
Zoro stays still for what feels like hours, but then, it is like his body is reacting on its own and he moves. He unlocks and opens the door to the crow's nest. A breath of fresh air in the crisp, cool night, and suddenly it is like his body realises how bad his overexertion has been. Muscles feel like they tear over his bones, and his form feels heavy, strength lost to his lack of food. He moves down to the deck of the ship, the boat moving quietly as it cuts through the ocean.
He trudges through the Sunny with slow steps, until he reaches the door to where you lay.
Zoro is still for a moment, unsure of what to expect. And in all honesty, he was scared. The Roronoa Zoro was terrified about what he would find. Would you be dead the instant he opened the door? Would you wake only to remember nothing of him or the crew? Would you stay still and unconscious forever?
Gritting his teeth, he curses himself.
He was the man, set to become the world's greatest swordsman goddammit. The swordsman of the fated Pirate King. And he would be damned if mere trepidation is what keeps him from seeing his woman.
He turns the door and enters.
He sees you for the first time in a week.
Soft moonlight falls from a window to your left, seeping onto your skin. You were unnaturally still, but nothing was protruding from your torso, no blood slipping past open wounds, and a surprising lack of medical instruments suspended from your form. You could've been sleeping if not for the bandage around your upper body, and the monitor to your side steadily rising and falling to the rhythm of your heart.
Tightness grips his heart as he looks at you.
If only he had been stronger.
If only he had been more vigilant.
But he also finds in him, the first breath of relief he had held from himself.
You were alive.
He doesn't know why he thought the worst, though the last he saw you he thought you would die. But now, all he does is drown in the relief of your living presence. The tightness of his hands loosens along with the ache in his chest. Fatigue builds and the exhaustion of such high emotions falls in the alleviation. He walks over to you and caresses one of your hands in his, still colder than he would've liked, but with a lingering warmth that has him able to breathe.
He looks at your face, serene and free of the pain that had plagued you mere days ago. You seemed at peace. Zoro lightly pushes away a strand of hair that falls upon your cheek, allowing himself an intimate moment with you. He then, presses a kiss to your forehead, feather-light, before he sits purposefully on the floor beside your bed. Tiredness takes over him, but his hands lay taut on his swords; damned if he doesn't protect you as you lay unconscious. He doesn't know what he guards you from now safely on the Sunny, but he allows himself the comfort of you next to him to free him of burdenous thoughts.
He sleeps for the first time in days.
.....
When you wake you are uncomfortable.
A dull and incessant pain ripples through your torso and your throat is dry beyond belief. Eyes fight the intrusion of soft light as you look around confused, your breath coming in short increments. You hear a beeping in the background matching the pace of your heart.
Where am I?
Where is everyone?
Where's Zo-
As your eyes travel frantically around the room you are in, you finally spot a bed of green hair at the foot of your bed.
Zoro...
Then, your memories flood back in: your desperation to save your boyfriend, the sharp intrusion of a sword, his shouts for you to stay with him, a silent goodbye.
Tears fall past your lashes but you are overcome with the relief that he was okay and well. You go to sit up, desperately wanting water that, lucky for you, was placed on the bedside table for when you woke. However, at a sudden movement, you involuntarily let out a sharp gasp, and your boyfriend stirs.
When Zoro opens his eyes, he too is momentarily lost in the confusion of his surroundings, and then he remembers. But his sharp senses are brought forth when he realises there is movement from the bed he sleeps beside, and he startles, only to meet your open eyes looking sheepishly at him.
"Oops, sorry Zoro, I just wanted a dri-"
"[y/n]..."
Zoro's voice is almost breathless as he frantically moves so that he is standing beside you and not on the floor. You almost laugh at the way he moves so quickly to your side, unable to hide a smile. However, it almost instantly falters when you witness rare tears line his eyes. Zoro's heart pounds in his chest as he looks at you, waiting patiently for him to collect himself, eyes shining with worry for his strange behaviour. But in his mind, there rushes one thought.
You are awake.
"Zoro, you okay?"
You ask, eyebrows pulled together in confusion. You assumed you had only been unconscious for a few hours, maybe a day, and so are stunned to silence when Zoro's low voice reaches your ears.
"You were unconscious, for a week."
His words are cracked and gravelly, as though he had not spoken a word in a while. Your eyes widen, but Zoro continues as you look on.
"You could've died [y/n]. I- I'm supposed to protect you goddammit woman. Why did you have to take the blade, I could've taken it! You weren't supposed to get hurt! I- How could you-"
Zoro's mind is scrambled with everything he wants to say, but instead, words of anger are pushed forth in his inability to process his emotions. Luckily for him, you realise, what a toll he must've been through. You knew you would likely lose your mind if the same thing had happened to Zoro, God you could basically relate what with the events of Thriller Bark entering your mind. You watch as he scrambles, eyes sharp with feigned anger that you know is worry.
"Zoro," you breathe, gently taking a hand that comes undone beneath your touch. "I couldn't just let you die, besides, scars on the back are a swordsman's shame." You murmur your words, seeing the way Zoro's eyes ignite with light. The man who had stabbed you had first aimed at your boyfriend's back; the man you knew aspired to be the greatest swordsman. You would not dishonour him, but more importantly, you would not see him get hurt, but apparently, he could not see you injured either.
"I would've taken the shame a hundred times over this."
"I don't regret my choices."
Zoro meets your determined gaze, a shine within them he missed. You still seemed pale, too pale for his liking. Your form seemed smaller due to the loss of blood and days unconscious, but you were still beautiful. Still, the strong, stubborn, loyal and devoted woman he fell in love with.
You look at your boyfriend the same way.
He seemed smaller, less muscle adorned his features, face dull from lack of sleep. He seemed withered but relieved, and you furrow your eyebrows once more, knowing that he had likely not looked after himself as you lay unconscious.
"Zoro, have you been eating properly?"
You murmur suspiciously, but your boyfriend seems to retrieve himself from what reverie he was in as he meets your enlightened gaze once more. His reply is an answer in itself as he looks to you.
"Don't pull that shit, again."
You roll your eyes but smile, Zoro's relief and care in a caress as he looks to you causing your heart to jolt.
"You know I can't make that promise."
However, just as Zoro is about to retort once more, the door to the infirmary smacks open, and in plunges Chopper. Comical tears cascade over his face, face torn between utter relief and utter joy.
"[Y/N]!! You're awake!! I was so worried!!"
You smile at the doctor you knew had a part in saving your life. Soon, more members of the crew are barging in to claim their relief and give you tearful hugs. Zoro tries to dispel his annoyance at the interruption of your time together, but he cannot help the small smile that reaches his face at the sight of you. You were there, alive, and happy, and the crew seemed all the more relieved for it.
"Now that [y/n]'s awake, it's time for a banquet!!"
Your Captain yells out in his glee and happiness as he clings to you, all the while Chopper scolds him for his roughness in the wake of your injuries. Nami is still hugging your arm in relief and Robin smiles from your bedside. Crewmembers shout in their happiness and Sanji meets Zoro's gaze knowingly. The crew were finally back to their normal selves, and Zoro would soon get there too. But throughout the whole exchange, Zoro's hand not once, lets go of yours.
