That post you reblogged is shitty though because it is important to acknowledge if ship dynamics are abusive or unhealthy because not everyone in fandom is an adult who can tell the difference.
I’m probably going to regret this when I’m more awake and haven’t been sitting in the ER for three hours but you caught me in a fighting mood, so. It is what it is.
I’ve been lowkey annoyed at this attitude that seems to be taking over fandom for a while, and this is just the straw that broke it. If you think it’s important to deconstruct the relationship critically and examine why it’s a flawed relationship and/or an abusive dynamic, knock yourself out. That is your perogative as a participant in fandom and I’m sure there are plenty of people that would love to read your meta. But at the point you start coming at other people about how they consume and enjoy media, you’ve crossed the line from litcrit into concern trolling.
It is not my job to protect people from the content of the media or the internet. I am not their mommy. If you consume something that makes you uncomfortable, then sure, talk about what made you uncomfortable. But don’t come in my inbox and tell me I have a responsibility to put up disclaimers beyond tagging my work. As a fandom author, your ONLY responsibility is to make sure the work you’re posting belongs to you and that you tag it accurately so readers know what they’re getting into (CNTW included). If a reader wants to talk to me directly about how something I wrote is not working for them or makes them uncomfortable or triggers them and needs a warning, that’s fine and I welcome it.
But it’s not okay to come up on someone and tell them it’s their responsibility to dissect what they enjoy as escapism. If you want to do that it’s on you. Personally, as someone who enjoys the fascinating and complicated depiction of dysfunctional relationships IN FICTION, I don’t want to take the time to do that. Fandom is the arena I come into to escape having to be on point about real world issues. It’s not the place I want to spend time examining social justice issues, because I do enough of that IRL.
And on an unrelated but equally annoying note, nobody has to disclose their personal trauma or history for fandom to decide they’re “allowed” to write about certain things. It’s super fucking rude to either assume something about a person’s background or, worse, ASK them about it (because wow no, if someone wants to talk to you that’s one thing but asking is fucking invasive and it’s not any of your damn business).
So yeah, talk all you want in your own meta on your own blog about how you dislike XYZ ship for whatever reason, but it’s nobody’s responsibility but yours to police what you consume and make sure it’s “problem free.”
Hell, half the ships I really enjoy, the dysfunction is WHY I enjoy it, because conflict is what creates compelling narratives. I don’t need to be informed about the dysfunction, and I definitely don’t need to slap up giant disclaimers about it. Read tags, avoid things you don’t want to read, and stop lambasting writers or artists who ship things you don’t like. It’s not your damn business.
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