misadventures in feminism

a collection of stories about -isms

[misadventuresinfeminism]

Short People Problems

Ok, I'm sure most everyone has climbed a kitchen counter to reach the tops of the cabinets at some point in their lives.  It's quite the hassle.  You regular and tall sized people get to literally grow out of this inconvenience.  Good for you.  Now imagine us short people, we're stuck with our shortness and are doomed to spend the rest of our short(haha) lives forever experiencing hassles like these!!  

How can a shorty thrive and prosper in a heightist world?  Well, as a female, I find I can conquer by simply jumping/climbing on top of everything/everyone. Literally, tall people actually cant do much when you jump and cling onto their backs.  Try it.  It's fun.

-Child-Sized Adult 

[misadventuresinfeminism]

[misadventuresinfeminism]

Tianna from Aftergloam

[misadventuresinfeminism]

whispers

“hey, it’s been awhile since i’ve seen katy. do you think like, something’s wrong? or she’s fucking..”

“i dunno, you know her better”

“should i call her?”

“why would you call when you can text her if you think she’s with the guy she brought?” 

*takes a puff of her smoke*

“true.”

“anyway, i should definitely sing a disney song, right?”

whispers: “oh shit! she was on the other balcony the whole time! i hope she didn’t hear us.”

[misadventuresinfeminism]

ASL

she thought that since her life was going in such a downward spiral as it was, she could maybe try being blatantly awful. she had taken her second year of sign language and watched a lot of internet videos where people got pranked. her personal favorite was the ones where the australians would follow directly behind people and see how long it took before the person noticed.

a variation: she, daisy, would pretend to be deaf at a party or two where no one knew her but who had taken her and see the difference in treatment. experiment one she conducted with a cute, nice faux sister (mary). there was a nice hot tub and daisy and mary were flirted with. unfortunately, daisy’s boyfriend couldn’t keep up and the ruse was had. the second experiment she conducted with a mean faux brother (nick) who would stomp to get her attention or just yell very loudly. we showed up to a birthday party that the birthday girl had already fallen asleep at. therefore, beer pong with strangers. every time daisy made a ball in, a particular girl would stretch her fingers to the max in a heart of utter adoration. every time daisy missed, the girl was her personal cheerleader, ensuring she would make the next shot.

ah, people.

[misadventuresinfeminism]

sharpie’d

claire walked into the party, feeling very much alone. someone placed a hand on her, kindly, and asked for her shoes to be placed in what seemed to be 30 other people’s shoes. she happily accepted and donned purple socks. things got better, as she was offered some hard liquor. people started playing guitars and drinking more. the boy named marco, who was obsessed with pop culture and being a DJ at house kickbacks, came up and made conversation. friendly as he was, the “that hoe over there” culture was just hanging in his atmosphere. his favorite phrase was to say “diiiiiiiiiick” whenever he was messing on someone. fun and games. eventually, some real conversation was had, and the party started to wind down. claire decided she was going to sleep over at the house, considering she could just walk home in the morning. late at night seemed to be asking for trouble. out the corner of her eye, marco was sleeping on the couch. somehow, even though he was playing the music for the party and had most likely shown up first, he was the only one with shoes on. 

while others drew penises, moustaches, vaginas, claire was much kinder. she abstained to only writing “DIIIIIIIIIICK.” along his right arm.