dare you to be who you will

"You can love a monster, it can even love you back, but that doesn’t change its nature. "- Eliza Crewe

[letsbelonelytogetherr]

— Gustave Flaubert, from a letter to Louise Colet (via letsbelonelytogetherr)

[elegyformysadness]

“I learned that just beneath the surface there’s another world, and still different worlds as you dig deeper. I knew it as a kid, but I couldn’t find the proof. It was just a kind of feeling. There is goodness in blue skies and flowers, but another force—a wild pain and decay—also accompanies everything.”

— David Lynch (via apoetreflects)

[arugulalover]

PRAYER FOR WEREWOLVES from We are Mermaids by Stephanie Burt

[brokenlinesandbetterdays]

Silent scream

It’s so heavy.

It’s too much.

I can’t breathe.

The weight of it holds me under.

I’m not drowning—

but my lungs are on fire.

My eyes sting

with unshed tears.

All I can hear

is the pounding of my heart—

so loud.

I want to scream,

but I can’t.

It gets stuck in my throat.

Then finally—

the dam breaks.

And the tears flood my face,

never ending.

That’s my silent scream.

My silent plea for help.

Please,

get me out of this cage—

this unspoken cycle

of break or be broken,

of love, hate, silence,

of stab and cover-over,

pretending like nothing happened.

But I can’t take it anymore.

It’s all becoming too much,

and it’s tearing me apart.

Slowly—

each layer of skin,

through bone and sinew,

straight to my heart.

[midwinter-tears]

Seeker of Souls

[gothredy]

[angel-b-torture]

[inkpressedpetals]

[crmsnmth]

Depression's Cold Hands

The first thing it takes Is not your body But your sense of edges

Time loosens Minutes melt into each other Until nothing has a beginning You sit very still Watching your thoughts wander off Without asking permission

The room becomes negotiable Walls lean in just to pull away Your name feels unfamiliar Like something borrowed From a stranger who trusted you once

There is relief Brief and convincing As sharp as a held breath Pain steps back just far enough To make you believe This is what healing looks like

But something else arrives quietly A narrowing A hunger that does not live in the stomach The need repeats itself Until it sounds like truth

You promise yourself this is temporary That control is still yours That you are choosing this moment The substance listens And says nothing

Later, the mirror refuses cooperation Your eyes are there But not entirely present Joy feels distant Grief feels procedural And everything in between Requires chemical permission

What it gives, it charges interest for Sleep becomes shallow Silence becomes unbearable The body keeps score Long after the mind Pretends to forget

You are still here but thinner Less available to yourself Learning slowly That escape is not the same As being free

[poisonintheink]

my broken pieces flow to your shore /

— ʀ.ᴛ.

[procrastinater-reader22]

a wooden house

once full of life

is now barely standing

i poured the gasoline and lit the match

but they made me drop it

and everything went up in flames

they ran out

while i kept standing

hoping they won't forget me so easily

they do

and when i come out if the house

i say im sorry

please forgive me

all is forgiven for a while

then they poured the gasoline

they lit the match

and dropped it

they locked the doors to

burning me with it

i say house instead of bridge

because they were my home

and just as easily as they moved in

they burned it down.

🌑

[mournfulroses]

Natalie Diaz, from a poem titled "September 2001," featured in The World Keeps Ending And The World Goes On

[ruielthecreatorofideas]

If the Dead Came Back to Life

If the dead came back to life

Would you still know who's on your side?

If they could speak the truth

Would anyone still care for you?

If your darkest moments were captured on film

Would you even have an edge on him?

If they knew what you hid

Would they still like you despite what you did?

I never imagined that you would still be likable

After it was obvious that you were unreliable

That your words and promises meant nothing at all

That you wouldn't help nobody even after they call

It should've been obvious with those threats

That you obviously had no regrets

You think you deserve more than you're even worth

Did you really think you could rule this Earth?

If the dead came back to life

Would you still know who's on your side?

If they could speak the truth

Would anyone still care for you?

If your darkest moments were captured on film

Would you even have an edge on him?

If they knew what you hid

Would they still like you despite what you did?

If the truth comes out, and I'm the one laughing last

Do you really think you could still hide your past?

Isn't it obvious that you've done something wrong?

You wouldn't have acted like this all along

If it wasn't because you felt guilty

But you don't even deserve pity

You made the world much worse off

By just one single cough

If the dead came back to life

Would you still know who's on your side?

If they could speak the truth

Would anyone still care for you?

If your darkest moments were captured on film

Would you even have an edge on him?

If they knew what you hid

Would they still like you despite what you did?

The truth behind those fiery eyes

Is enough to give anyone butterflies

And I'm worried that you will hurt me

If you ever find me

But who knows what you're even thinking

Chained to a ship that continues sinking

Because you couldn't control yourself for even one night

I don't know what made you so impolite

If the dead came back to life

Would you still know who's on your side?

If they could speak the truth

Would anyone still care for you?

If your darkest moments were captured on film

Would you even have an edge on him?

If they knew what you hid

Would they still like you despite what you did?

I don't understand what happened the day I was forced away

It almost felt like my whole existence turned to gray

The world that I once knew has all but shattered

But if you actually cared it wouldn't even matter

I trusted the wrong person

I gave the wrong reason

Too much power over me

Why didn't I see?

If the dead came back to life

Would you still know who's on your side?

If they could speak the truth

Would anyone still care for you?

If your darkest moments were captured on film

Would you even have an edge on him?

If they knew what you hid

Would they still like you despite what you did?

I hope you disappear for a long time

Because I don't even want you to continue haunting my mind

I hate the way I can't forget these memories with you

But it's rather obvious there's nothing I can do

If I wasn't so powerless to my own thought pattern

I would probably be living a much better life where I mattered

I hate the way it keeps me up at night

I hate the way you act like you're so goddamn polite

If the dead came back to life

Would you still know who's on your side?

If they could speak the truth

Would anyone still care for you?

If your darkest moments were captured on film

Would you even have an edge on him?

If they knew what you hid

Would they still like you despite what you did?

[paper-wounds]

[proseknowsbest]

[nixscriptum]

[ruielthecreatorofideas]

This Face in the Mirror

I can’t tell you how I feel anymore

Got my mind out the door

Thinking up brand new worlds

Hoping to change this world

But instead I was on the verge of ruin

Did they smell what was brewing?

And the things I had to try to let go of

Made me feel like I was never enough

And when I look in the mirror I see someone else’s face

But the funny thing is that my face hasn’t changed

It’s just a different version of the same face I recognized

And the weird thing is that when I realized

All of the things I know now

There wasn’t ever an easy way out

It makes it so hard to explain

Will they ever know the pain?

The times I went through

Did I ever deserve you?

The cause and effects of all of this messed with my head

But I was never close enough to you for you to feel my dread

The long nights that never ended for me

I can remember that the silence felt deadly

The words that came out of his mouth

Were most foul

And when I look in the mirror I see someone else’s face

But the funny thing is that my face hasn’t changed

It’s just a different version of the same face I recognize

And the weird thing is that when I realized

All of the things I know now

There wasn’t ever an easy way out

It makes it so hard to explain

Will they ever know the pain?

I tried to explain how it all felt

But I can’t explain how it felt

How I fell apart faster than you can say anything

Because he made me feel like I was nothing

I tried to fix myself after all the pain

But it only got worse in the rain

The sleepless nights

The countless fights

And when I look in the mirror I see someone else’s face

But the funny thing is that my face hasn’t changed

It’s just a different version of the same face I recognize

And the weird thing is that when I realized

All of the things I know now

There wasn’t ever an easy way out

It makes it so hard to explain

Will they ever know the pain?

I watched the world move on too many times

I was tried for too many crimes

Most of which were not mine

But you’ll see in time

That I tried too hard

Just to fall apart

My love should’ve been scared from the start

But they never understood that part

And when I look in the mirror I see someone else’s face

But the funny thing is that my face hasn’t changed

It’s just a different version of the same face I recognize

And the weird thing is that when I realized

All of the things I know now

There wasn’t ever an easy way out

It makes it so hard to explain

Will they ever know the pain?

The world sees nothing like I do

I would be more comfortable if there was no point of view

I don’t remember things in first person

Did you ever realize the reason?

I should’ve known it from the start

But I realized it at the wrong part

At the wrong time

And he almost convinced me that it was a crime