I think something that's really important to consider when watching and/or analyzing Dead Poets' Society is the effect Mr Keating had on every single student in his class. Just because the movie may focus more on Neil and Todd, it is incredibly important to consider how different characters were affected by his teachings.
Of course, you have Neil and Todd. He helped Todd to come out of his shell with his friends and with poetry and writing, and he helped Neil to consider the other possibilities outside of what was planned for him.
However, he did the same thing for everyone else as he did for Neil. Specifically in the DPS, he helped Cameron learn how to break the rules sometimes and appreciate art, he helped Charlie learn to tone down his already rebellious nature, he helped Meeks and Pitts to come more out of their shells and to push the rules. Sure, with Charlie and Cam, it didn't work in the end because of Neil's death. But Neil and Todd are not the only ones affected by Keating's teachings, and they're not the only ones we should be focusing on when analyzing the movie and characters.
One part that stands out to me that explains this well, I think, is Hopkins standing up on his desk at the end in addition to the DPS and others in the class. Hopkins, although a small side character, was incredibly important to include because he was the one that didn't care about anything Mr Keating had to say in the first place. He didn't care about school or art or poetry, yet Mr Keating still affected him enough that he showed his appreciation at the end by standing on his desk. That is just how much of an effect Mr Keating had, especially when you factor in their situation and the time. (Also just in general it's an important part of media literacy to consider the viewpoints of multiple different characters but yeah. I especially just really enjoy considering things from other perspectives but yeah.)
Specifically with the students learning how to push the boundaries, consider what other options there were, he definitely did that for everyone. With some, it didn't work, addled by grief and past loyalties. But Neil and Todd are not the only ones he did that for. Without Mr Keating, none of them (esp Neil) might have considered what was out there for them other than Ivy League and prosperous futures. The most that might have happened would be Todd coming out of his shell a bit because of Neil, or Charlie getting in trouble for acting out. (And all of this means Cameron's train of thought is completely logical but thats a post for another time.)
Anyway, as much as I love fics/etc where Mr Keating becomes like a second dad to Neil or Todd, I don't think that was what was meant to happen. He was never meant to be permanent. He was meant to show them, however briefly, what life could be. The slightest bit of traveling outside the boundaries could have changed these boys' entire lives, and probably did for a lot of those students. Without him, they wouldn't have known a life outside of what was planned for them. He's not meant to replace Mr Perry or Mr Anderson or whoever, he is meant to be a source of inspiration and encouragement and necessary rule-breaking, not a permanent figure.
(helpful not-to-scale and very high-def visual as to approx how much I think each character was affected on a scale of not rule-breaking at all to very rule-breaking 🙂↕️)
@aerinsarsenal (i talked abt this some on discord but thought i would make a post abt it lmaoo)
Currently binge watching squid games and I’ve forgotten how much I love this show. From my literal love Hyun-ju to the complexity of the Frontman as a character. It’s all so good and has such strong writing.
Enoch has a sweet spot for the reader’s little sister. When reader has to go out of town, Enoch steps up to watch and comfort Claire.
Several of Miss Peregrine’s wards played outside enjoying the last moments of sunshine. A few of the children kicked a ball around while the smaller children played on the seesaw. The sun was setting, but otherwise the sky was clear. The large clock tower in the small town began to chime.
The first chime echoed throughout the loop. By the third chime clouds began to form in the sky. The fifth chime signaled the sun’s final descent. By the seventh, and final, chime, the sky was dark.
Suddenly the wind began to howl as clouds moved through the sky. Mist drifted up the path from the sea to the children’s home. The children that were playing in the yard all rushed back inside the house, yet none of them seemed worried about the storm.
One of the children, a teenager named Enoch, watched the storm clouds from the kitchen window. He leaned against the counter and furrowed his brows slightly as he took in the sight outside. His eyes quickly flickered to the clock and saw it read two minutes past seven. The corner of his mouth pulled into a slight smirk as he began to count to ten. Once he reached ten, lightning flashed outside and rain began to fall.
Enoch turned away from the window and saw the youngest child, a six year old named Claire, was sitting in the bay window. Her lips were in a pout as she watched the rain. Enoch shook his head and chuckled to himself and went to sit by the young girl.
Little Claire Densmore looked up at the storm that was brewing in her loop. She clutched her soft teddy bear Enoch had given her closer to her chest. She did not like the storms that visited every night. They were loud and unpleasant. Even though they were predictable and she knew to be inside the house exactly ten seconds after 7:02 PM to avoid the rain, she still hated them.
The way the raindrops would fall down the windows of the house and prevent her from playing outside bothered her. She loved the outdoors. But even more so, the falling rain signified the arrival of the bomber planes.
Now these planes scared Claire, for they were unpredictable. One little thing could be different and it could yield a completely different result. She hated the uncertainty around whether something they did could alter the course of the planes. And if the plane dropped a bomb a little earlier the bird might not catch it. The thought always terrified her. It scared her so much that the very thought of it caused her backmouth to anxiously grind its teeth. She felt one of her bright blonde curls get caught on one of the sharp teeth in her backmouth.
Enoch noticed movement from the back of Claire’s head and pulled away her hair. He saw her backmouth anxiously chewing on some of the curls. He frowned a little and took one of her ribbons and began to plait her hair.
Claire seemed to relax as she felt the boy’s fingers in her hair. His touch was gentle as he worked her curls into a messy braid. He fished in his pocket and after a moment took out some pins so he could pin the braid into a bun. Once the hair was out of the way, her backmouth stopped gnawing on it.
Enoch chuckled, “Are you scared, little one?”
Claire turned her attention back to Enoch and nodded her head. Her eyes were wide, and she looked sheepish, almost embarrassed to admit it. “I don’t like that Y/N had to visit another loop. I miss her.”
Enoch just smiled softly and ruffled her hair. “No need to worry, you’re sister will be back tomorrow. And in the meantime, the rain’s outside and you’re inside, all warm and safe.”
Claire pouted and climbed onto Enoch’s lap, still holding her teddy bear. Enoch only chuckled at the gesture and began to rub the back of the small child. She relaxed a little as she felt Enoch’s warm hand running up and down her back. Enoch’s gaze fell back to the world outside, and he watched as the gardens flooded with rainwater.
Claire trembled slightly in Enoch’s lap, clearly terrified of the lightning and thunder. Enoch rubbed her back reassuringly. He whispered to her, “Do you want me to do the back tracing game?”
Claire nodded her head eagerly and Enoch chuckled. He placed her down on the floor and sat right behind her. His fingers lightly grazed her spine. He began to hum softly.
“Around the world in eighty days,” his voice was soft as he traced a circle on her back.
He began to draw a large x on her back as he whispered, “X marks the spot, four big boulders and one tiny rock.”
Claire giggled as he poked the center of her back lightly. She began to mumble the words to the rhyme as well. In unison they both whispered, “Spiders crawling up your back. Snakes slithering down. Spiders crawling up your back. Snakes slithering down.”
Claire’s tension left her body as Enoch shook her slightly. He just chuckled, “A shake and a squeeze and a nice cool breeze. Now you have the shiveries.”
She giggled at the feeling. Goosebumps covered her skin and she shivered. Claire turned back towards Enoch and climbed back into his lap. Even though it was still raining outside, the tension seemed to have left her body. She snuggled into him as she held her teddy bear. Enoch just sat there and continued to rub her back as they listened to the rain together.
Later that night, after all the peculiar children ate dinner, they rushed to the window to observe Miss Peregrine. She walked out in the rain with a sleek umbrella. Her face was mostly hidden by the material, but she seemed to be counting. Slowly, she watched as the seconds ticked by on her pocket watch.
Enoch looked up at the sky and saw the planes from the night before flying overhead. The plane swooped low in the sky and opened its hatch. A large bomb fell out from the bottom and started to fall towards the house. Claire anxiously held Enoch’s hand, even though she knew they would be okay.
Miss Peregrine waited, watching as the bomb got closer and closer to the house. Right when her pocket watch hit thirteen minutes past nine, she wound it back. The bomb ascended back into the sky and into the plane. The plane flew backwards and out of sight.
Claire relaxed as she saw the plane disappear. Soon the rain was being pulled up from the ground and shooting back into the sky. Even though she hated the bomber planes, Claire loved watching the loop’s reset.
She stood on her tiptoes as she watched the rain rise further into the sky and the clouds move around. Miss Peregrine continued to wind her pocket watch resulting in the sun rising once again to reveal a sunny day.
As she kept winding her watch, the sun made its way back over the horizon. The sun set again plunging the island into darkness once more. The reset was complete and now the loop was ready to repeat its twenty four hour increment.
Claire tugged on Enoch’s hand making him look down at her. Her eyes were droopy and she yawned. Enoch shook his head playfully and scooped her up in his arms. She relaxed in his arms and rested her head on his shoulder. She slowly drifted off to sleep as he carried her up the stairs.
Enoch carefully walked up the stairs to Claire’s room. He gently pushed open the door to her bedroom and laid her down on the bed. She curled up on the soft mattress and hugged her teddy bear closer to her. Enoch took her comforter and placed it over her small frame. Claire dosed peacefully as she was engulfed in the warmth from the blanket.
Enoch slowly closed the door behind him and went back down the stairs. He bumped into Emma on the way down. Emma was a pretty girl about the same age as Enoch. Her hair was a pale blonde that complimented her pale skin. Emma gave Enoch a knowing look.
He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “What?”
She chuckled as she looked at the boy. “You are such an interesting case O’Connor. Snippy with others and yet you are a big softie with Claire.”
Enoch rolls his eyes. “And what’s wrong with being sweet to Claire?”
“Nothing,” Emma smiles. “Just be glad Y/N didn’t see it, otherwise she might be all over you. She’s so protective of her little sister, I bet she’d love you.”
Enoch’s ears heat up at the mention of your name. He turns his head to the side and smiles softly.
His face slowly heats up with a soft blush. “I think I’d be okay with that.”
I have some ideas for angst and want to know if I should explore them. It is not what I typically write, so I want to know if that is something yall want to see.
“Haymitch!” I called my boyfriend’s name as he stepped off the train. He had just won the Hunger Games. Not just the Hunger Games, the second Quarter Quell. Where he competed with 47 other tributes. When he had won I was ecstatic and couldn’t wait for him to come home. But then I went to his family’s home and found nothing but the bleeding bodies of his parents and younger brother.
When he finally reached me, having to fight through the throngs of excited District 12 citizens, he wiped away my tears with a smile, mistaking them for tears of joy. “I’m back, sweetheart,” he smiled, pressing his forehead to mine. But as he pulled away he noticed my lack of a smile. “What?” he asked, fear creeping into his throat.
“I’m so sorry,” I cried, handing him his parents’ wedding rings. He immediately knew what that means.
“No,” he tried to deny, shaking his head. “No.”
~~
“Y/N L/N,” the district escort’s voice rang out as he called my ex-girlfriend’s name. I was honestly surprised I had managed to comprehend it at all given that the crowd was a blurry haze and every word was melted together in my brain. But I saw her clearly as she walked up to the stage, fear and rage on her face. I assumed fear for the games, rage for me.
She had been there for me as I grieved my family’s death. Even when I pushed her away she was there for me. She was killing herself for me while I poisoned myself with booze and hate. All until I couldn’t handle her care and my rage anymore so I picked a fight.
“Can you not?!” I yelled as she tried to clean up my new house a little. “Just fucking leave it.”
Her sad expression, I regret to say, brought me satisfaction. I loved to hurt her for no reason. A small part of me was pained to hurt her, I think that’s what allowed me to push her away rather than trap her with my hate. “Sorry,” she murmured softly.
“Yeah you’ve said that before,” I spat, poison dripping from my words. “Why are you still here?”
She sighed, biting her lip. I could see she was silently debating whether or not she’d open herself up to being attacked by my again. “Because I love you,” she admitted painfully, tears pricking her eyes.
I scoffed. “Well I don’t love you anymore.” A small piece of my heart broke as I watched her shatter. I had spent weeks abusing her, something a part of me reveled in, but I had never hurt her this bad.
She nodded her head compassionately. “I understand.” And with that, she walked out of my life for what I thought would be forever. The part of me that had reveled in her pain immediately became regretful as I watched her go. My regret only continued to grow as I kept tabs on her throughout her life.
I tried to catch her eye as she took her place next to our escort but she refused to spare a glance at me. I understood, I had tortured her when I got back and had spent the better part of a year borderline stalking her.
I glanced at the crowd, finding her new boyfriend of five months, Rune, standing there, slack jawed. I rolled my eyes at the oaf as the male tribute’s name was called, Landon Caleban. Of course Rune didn’t volunteer to protect his girl. I would’ve. Eleven months ago I would’ve laughed at her reaping but now that my anger had faded a little, I would give anything to take her place.
As she was escorted into the capital building, I followed, immediately going into the room she went into. She had barely sat down by the time I entered and it broke my heart that she looked so surprised to see me. “Y/N…”
“What are you doing here, Haymitch?” she asked coldly.
“Well,” I began, taking a seat across from her, “I am your mentor. And… I also care about you.”
She rolled her eyes. “Yeah well you sure as hell didn’t care about me when you told me you didn’t love me anymore.”
I looked down at my shoes, ashamed. “I know and I'm sorry. I’d take back everything if I could. I was hurt, and angry, and god… I felt so powerless.”
“And I was your helpless punching bag?” she finished for me, disgust in her eye.
I nodded regretfully. “I made you, the girl I love who did nothing but support me, into a punching bag,” I confirmed, still looking at the ground in shame.
“Loved,” was all she said. I looked at her quizzically causing her to roll her eyes again. “You said ‘girl I love.’ You should say loved.”
“No, I still love you,” I insisted.
“You’re the one who said you didn’t love me anymore.”
“That’s because I had a lot of misplaced anger,” I insisted. “Yes, I know it’s not fair that I took everything out on you and I have no right to try to tell you I love you but I do.”
“Well what good does that do me? I’m being marched to my deat-”
“Don’t!” I cut her off “…fucking say that. You’re not fucking dying. I’m your mentor, I’ll get you out of there.”
Before she could respond, the door creaked open. I knew even before he spoke that it was Rune. “Babe, oh my god.” I cringed as I knew she hated being called that. He rushed over to her side, taking her hand in his. “I don’t even know what to say… I just…”
She shook her head dismissively. “You don’t have to say anything.”
“I promise I won’t date anyone else for a while,” he said genuinely, as if it were a touching thing to say. Even I knew that was probably the worst thing he could say. Y/N also stared up at him, a baffled look on her face. She made no verbal indication she heard him so I did. I scoffed, catching the little twerp’s attention. Upon seeing me, his face immediately soured. He knew who I was, what I had meant to Y/N. Everyone in 12 knew we were a couple. “Don’t you have a bottle of whiskey to down yourself in, Haymitch?” he sneered.
I just chuckled at his attempt to tell me to stay out of it. “Maybe you should try treating her decently and saying goodbye instead of planning your next random hookup.”
“You’re one to talk about ‘treating her decently,’” Rune immediately mocked.
Before I could respond, Y/N stood up. “Both of you shut up and get out.”
I started to say her name, hoping she wouldn’t kick me out too but she cut me off, insisting we both go. So I went reluctantly, making sure Rune left too. I’d be damned if I ever let him have a moment alone with her ever again.
As soon as we stepped into the hall, a woman I recognized as Y/N’s mother rushed in, tears in her eyes. As the door closed, Rune stepped close to me. “I know what you’re planning, Abernathy. But she’s not going back to you. You’re just a useless, 17 year old drunk who broke her heart. And I’m not gonna let you break her again.”
Some part of me knew he was right, I shouldn't be inserting myself in her life again but I had been missing her for the past eleven months. And now it was also my job to keep her alive despite only winning last year.
Not one to let Y/N’s rebound talk me down, I retaliated. “At least I actually believe in her and actually want to see her come out of this alive.”
Offense crossed over his face. “You don’t get to say that. You got lucky. We all know the odds, especially with you as a mentor. I’m her boyfriend, you blew your chance!” he yelled before storming off. I wanted to yell after him but I didn’t know what to say that hasn’t been said already so I just clenched my jaw before heading to the train.
~
I didn’t see Y/N again until we arrived at the Capitol. Probably for the best, I spent the two day journey sleeping and getting shitfaced. I hadn’t been back to the Capitol since my victory tour and I had absolutely no desire to go back but I’d be stuck doing this shit until there were two more victors.
When we all finally got off the train I finally saw her. She looked exhausted, like she hadn’t slept since she was reaped. I honestly understood. I tried to catch her eye but she seemed determined to look everywhere but me. And before I could try to approach her, she was whisked off to styling. So reluctantly I went to the penthouse until the tribute parade.
~
I stood with the other mentors, watching the tribute parade. My heart stopped when I saw the District 12 chariot. The camera never bothered to focus on them long but from the glimpse I saw, Y/N was hardly clothed. As was typical for District 12 tributes. The stylists were a big fan of just dumping black powder on us.
By the time the tributes were re-entering the building, all the mentors were waiting to bring their tributes back upstairs. Heading over to the last chariot I found Landon helping Y/N down from the chariot. She struggled in her stilettos and mini black skirt. I averted my gaze from her mostly bare torso, the only thing covering her was a lace top shaped to look like smoke. Along with an unhealthy dose of black powder to portray the coal-mines. Something they did practically every year. I kept my gaze firmly on her from the shoulders up. It felt like a violation of her privacy to ogle her like all the Capitol citizens or how I would have back when we were together.
I managed to meet her gaze but she quickly looked away, refusing to look at me again. Even in the elevator I caught myself staring at her longingly, just wishing she’d at least look at me. But she never did. As we stepped into the penthouse I let her go to her room. Remembering how exhausted she must have been, I had sleeping pills sent to her room along with a steak.
~
The next morning I sat at the table in the main room of the penthouse, eating breakfast. My attention was caught by Landon and Y/N heading to the elevator for training. I couldn’t help but admire the way the athletic clothing hugged her body. But as I noticed what I was doing, I averted my gaze back down to my food. It wasn’t until I heard a throat clearing that I looked back up at the pair. Y/N was looking at me, a conflicted and grateful look on her face. “Thanks for the uh… stuff, last night,” she thanked quietly.
“No problem,” I replied, in slight awe that she was talking to me. She just gave me a slight smile of acknowledgement before stepping into the elevator and disappearing.
I spent the next several minutes just staring at my plate grateful that I was finally getting somewhere with her.
~
I watched anxiously as Y/N took the stage for her interview. She looked absolutely stunning. Of course I always thought she was stunning but I had to admit, some of the Capitol glamours I could get behind. She was practically glowing under the lights, makeup drawing attention to her best features.
As always, everything was in a slight haze but when Caesar asked her a certain question, it sobered me up a bit. “So is there anyone back home that you’re fighting for?”
Y/N did her best to give a graceful smile. She knew how to appeal to the audience. “Well, my mom is back home rooting for me. I can count on her for that.”
“How sweet. Any boys?” he suggested cheekily.
I watched as uncertainty crossed her face before she answered. “Yes,” she answered, her voice noticeably weak, “my boyfriend, Rune.”
“Aw, well isn’t that so sweet, huh folks?” The crowd made coos of sympathy. “Tell me, did he visit you before he left?”
“Yes,” she answered, her voice cracking slightly again. “He said…” she trailed off before she seemed to decide what to say. “He said he couldn’t wait to see me after the games and that he loves me.” She gave a weak smile and my heart broke. I couldn’t believe she was lying to make this guy look good when I was the one who was actually there for her. Ever since she had thanked me for the food and sleeping pills, our relationship had improved. She no longer ignored and avoided my presence and conversation attempts. We had engaged in a few polite conversations and had even slipped back into old habits. One night, at dinner, Landon mentioned wanting to ally himself with the careers. To which Y/N and I instinctually shared a look of ridicule. I could feel my heart swell every time we interacted more like we used to. But an unreasonable amount of hurt rang in my chest as she essentially defended her dirtbag boyfriend.
I didn’t even bother to finish watching her interview, I just went straight upstairs to my room in the penthouse, bringing a bottle of vodka with me.
I don’t know how long I was laying there watching some stupid reality tv show when the door opened. In stepped Y/N in a sweater so long it looked like her legs were bare. Her face was cleaned of makeup, leaving a fresh look and I could see the exaggerated curls in her hair that remained from her updo. She just stood in the doorway, hugging herself, until I spoke. “Y/N,” I said a little too eagerly, having never expected to see her in my room again after I ended things. “Wh-what’s up?” I tried to ask casually.
She shrugged. “I’m here to drink,” was all she said.
Sitting further up, I held the bottle out to her, simultaneously gesturing to the bed to offer her a seat. She took both, perching herself at the foot of the bed, her legs crossed so she was looking at me. She took a deep swig from the bottle, cringing as she pulled it away. I couldn’t help but chuckle at her expression, she never got used to the taste and burn of alcohol. She noticed my expression and smiled slightly. “You know I hate the taste,” she explained, the slightest teasing tone in her voice.
“I remember,” I smiled fondly. “The only thing you liked was that flavored shit we got off that peacekeeper.”
She smiled, looking at the bottle in her hand. “Yeah, that was good. I got so drunk that night,” I got a genuine laugh out of that comment and it made my stomach do cartwheels.
“So what brings you here tonight?” I asked as she passed me the bottle.
“Well I’m being marched to my death tomorrow,” she laughed bitterly. Before I could try to console her she met my gaze. “How did you feel before you went in?”
I pondered for a second, trying to recall. “I was afraid,” I admitted. “I thought that there was no way in hell I’d survive but I wasn’t ready to die.” She hummed, nodding. I took another swig of vodka before passing it to her. “Why’d you lie about Rune during your interview?”
“You saw that?” sha asked. “I didn’t know you watched. The other mentors were there but you weren’t.” She noticed I wasn’t there? “I guess I just wanted them to think I had a reason to live,” she sighed. “I don’t really know what I was thinking but I figured bashing my-still-technically-boyfriend on national television wasn’t the best idea.”
“‘Still-technically-boyfriend?’” I questioned. “Y/N, he basically said that when, not if, when you were gone he’d be dating other girls. He’s not your boyfriend anymore.”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. We never officially said that we were broken up so it feels wrong to bash him.”
“Fuck him, fuck his feelings!” I insisted. She laughed a little at my exaggerated outburst.
“I guess I just feel like I still have an obligation to him. Like I can’t move on before we have the conversation and I may never get to have the conversation,” she mused ruefully.
I scooted closer to her, placing my fingers under her chin to make her look at me. A move from when we were together. “Hey, what do you mean obligation?” I found pain in her eyes as I asked.
She hesitated before answering me. But as she did she averted her gaze as if in shame. “You said you still love me?” she asked meekly.
My heart broke at her doubt. “Of course I do,” I promised, bringing her gaze back up again. “I never stopped. Yeah, I was angry and I took it out on you and I never should have. But I love you.” She hesitated with her next words and I took the chance to kiss her. She immediately melted into my lips much to my relief. I pulled her closer until she was practically perched in my lap, the bottle of liquor on the nightstand long forgotten.
~
The automatic alarm controlled by the Capitol went off at 6 am. As I shut the damn thing up I rolled back over, resuming my place cuddled up to Y/N. Both my arms were wrapped around her waist, my head cuddled into the crook of her neck. She groaned at having been woken up, probably a little hungover. “Morning,” I murmured into her bare shoulder. She just groaned again. This time I figured it was a groan of remembering what day it was. “C’mon,” I said, pushing myself up to rest on my hands, “you need to eat breakfast.”
She rolled over reluctantly, finally meeting my face. “Can’t even think about eating.”
“I know but you’ll thank yourself for eating later,” I advised, getting out of bed and throwing some clothes on. She followed suit, heading to the door. As I tried to follow, she stopped me.
“Wait, come out in a couple minutes.”
“Why? Are you embarrassed of me?” I asked only mildly genuinely.
“No,” she dismissed genuinely, placing a hand on my arm. “How’s it gonna look to Landon when I come out of your bedroom with you? With terrible bed head?” she added jokingly. I just hummed in agreement, gesturing for her to continue.
A few moments later I joined both Y/N and Landon before they were both ushered off.
~
The entire games I was a mess. I was ashamed to admit that I couldn’t remember most of it, too wracked with worry. I only ever sobered up enough to watch the rundowns of what had happened that day, listening for Y/N’s name when they listed the deceased.
I thanked whatever cruel deity was out there that Y/N survived another day. And when they told me she won, I wanted to break down crying in relief.
By the time I was able to see her, she was still very injured. She laid in the hospital bed, asleep, and it took everything in me not to shake her awake for reassurance that she was still in fact alive. But instead I settled for grasping her warm hand and listening to the rhythmic beep of her heart through the monitor. They kicked me out periodically to work on healing her and a day later, when they let me back in the room, her eyes were fluttering open.
“Y/N,” I uttered. My voice had an unexpectedly broken sob but if she noticed, she didn’t care. She sat up as best as she could as I enveloped her in a hug as tightly as possible without hurting her. “You’re alive.”
“I’m okay,” she assured me. I could feel her fingers in my hair, her other hand rested against my shoulder as she hugged me as close as possible. With as much strength as her weakened, malnourished frame would allow.
I finally pulled away, my hand cupping her face as I admired her face. She had scrapes on her face and a bruised jaw but it was otherwise unmarred. “I love you,” I whispered before pressing my lips to hers.
~
I stood behind Y/N as she stepped off the train, smiling down at her as the crowd cheered. She just stood there on the platform for a moment, seemingly in a daze. I couldn’t be more thrilled in this moment. Of course we were both shattered, both fragments of who we used to be before the games. But we were holding each other together nonetheless. I was just so grateful she made it. The picture-perfect happiness was shattered by a shout.
“Y/N!” Rune’s voice broke through the crowd. My mood immediately dropped. Ever since that night we spent together I had forgotten about the twerp.
Y/N seemed to hardly register his presence as he jumped up on the platform. He was immediately kissing her, dipping her into what would be a picture-perfect photo if it weren’t for what happened and the fact that she was visibly uncomfortable. When they broke away, he pulled her back up to her feet before pulling her in closely once again to pose for the camera. All the while, Y/N looked visibly uncomfortable from even just the rear.
I wanted to punch him. I wanted to rip the douchebag away from her and inform him that she didn’t love him. But for the sake of not creating an incredibly public, embarrassing scenario for her, I kept my fists at my sides and my mouth shut.
Y/N managed to pull away from him, disappearing into the crowd with peacekeeper escorts. Rune tried to follow after her but I stepped up to him quickly. “Hey, don’t count on this five second of fame,” I informed him in an admittedly snide tone.
He looked deeply unhappy to see me. “She’ll be my wife soon enough. She declared her love for me on national television. You didn’t do that for her,” he remarked smugly.
I glanced around, noticing most of the crowd and cameras were gone. “She never said that she loved you,” I corrected. “Besides, why’d she spend the night in my bed after that interview then?”
A dark look crossed over his face. “You didn’t. She would never.”
I admit that it’s juvenile but pride swelled in my chest as I watched him become increasingly indignant. “She did. She told me she only said that because she felt obliged to and then we slept together.”
Rage filled his features. “You’re lying, Abernathy. I know you are. What’s your game? Are you hoping that if you tell enough people you slept together she’ll just come back to you out of shame? That’s pathetic.”
I took a step closer to him, getting in his face. “You’re the one refusing to accept the truth. That makes you the pathetic one.”
Rune just looked at me with disgust. “Whatever, I guess we’ll both just have to get the truth from her tonight.”
I shrugged with a smirk. “I guess we will.”
~
I hardly even caught a glimpse of Y/N the entire day as she was too busy being pulled in every direction. Her mom was all to eager to welcome her back into her home while the district officials were trying to get them moved into their new home in Victor’s Village next to mine. Then, of course, there were the people she didn’t really know who were all too eager to suck up to the newest victor, hoping to gain a little bit of fame and wealth. And then finally, there was Rune who was practically stitching himself to her side. I was debating whether or not I should go to her and rescue her from the overwhelming-ness of being a victor and Rune’s attempts. But I decided against it, not wanting to add to her stress and because I feared that if that little bitch opened his mouth I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from punching him.
It wasn’t until the welcome back party a few of her friends threw for her that I got a chance to speak with her.
As I approached her in the crowded room, I held out a shot glass. “Grapefruit vodka?” She smiled, taking it from me.
“Where did you get this?”
“I requested a bottle before we left the Capitol,” I smiled down at her. “Congratulations, Y/N, seriously. I know the party and the drinks are a meager consolation but you deserve it,” I professed, bringing her into a hug.
She hugged me tightly in return. “Thank you, Haymitch. For everything.”
“Of course,” I returned, pulling away from the hug but still keeping her in my arms. I reached a hand up to her face. “I love you,” I professed, kissing her. Which she returned. Until she was literally ripped from my grasp. As I was wrenched back into reality I saw Rune holding Y/N by her arm.
“What the hell, Y/N?” he yelled at her.
“Hey, back off,” I told him, moving to get his grip off of her arm. But he just stumbled back, tugging her along with him.
“No, what the hell is going on?” he demanded, looking at Y/N. “I thought you hated him.”
She shook her head. “Maybe for a bit I did but you don’t get to act all incredulous, Rune. After I got reaped you said you wouldn’t date anyone else ‘for a while,’” she mocked his words. “You couldn’t even wait until I was dead. I know about Selene Ducote. While I was fucking fighting for my life you were more concerned about getting your dick wet than seeing if I’d survive. You were depending on my death.”
Rune stood there, still gripping her arm, flabbergasted. “Yeah well, you slept with Haymitch.”
“Yeah, I did” she freely admitted, “and now I don’t feel guilty about it.”
Rage filled Rune’s face as he clenched his jaw. His free hand moved to grip her jaw, “Here’s what’s gonna happen. You’re gonna end things with him,” he nodded to me with disgust, “and we’re gonna get married because I know that you are in love with me.” He sent a final glare to me and I noticed his grip tightening. “Am I clear, you fucking slut?”
Now it was my turn to be filled with rage. Before I knew what was happening, I was throwing a punch at Rune’s face. He crumpled and would have brought Y/N down with him if it weren’t for the fact that I caught her around the waist. By now, the rest of the crowd had noticed us and were unsure of who’s side to take. Because while everyone had known Rune and Y/N were dating, they had also been aware of our relationship and took notice of the way she was huddled against my chest.
Rune got up, intending to punch me in return but Y/N pulled out of my arms, stepping up to him. “Enough, Rune,” she chastised him. “We’re over. We’ve been over. You’re making this so much more pathetic for yourself.” Seeing as the guest of honor had clearly made her allegiance known, the other attendees began booing him out. I only caught a glimpse of him walking out in shame because Y/N was stood in front of me again. She cupped my jaw, reaching up to kiss me.
Later that night we were both sat in her kitchen as she attempted to heal my hand that had admittedly been a little banged up when I punched Rune. We were both a little drunk so I was grateful her mom was back at her old house.
I hissed as she dabbed rubbing alcohol against my split knuckles. “If you take a swig maybe it won’t hurt so much,” she giggled.
I chuckled, admiring her blissful expression. “You can’t drink this type of alcohol sweetheart,” I explained gently. She pouted softly but didn’t say anything else as she focused on my hand.
When she deemed my hand disinfected enough, she pulled away. “I need something to wrap it with. Maybe there’s some cloth?” she suggested. She went to the cabinets, rummaging through them. Most of them were empty but a few had supplies that came with the house.
As she was looking, I quickly began to miss her touch so I got up. I wrapped my arms around her from behind, trapping her between my body and the counter. I pressed my face into her shoulder and the crook of her neck, pressing kisses into her skin. “I don’t need a bandage,” I slurred in assurance. “I won the 50th Hunger Games.”
“And I won the 51st,” she countered.
“I beat 47 others,” I argued playfully as she spun in my arms so she was facing me.
She wrapped her arms around my neck. “Shut up,” she laughed before kissing me.
I will elaborate on this but imagine MobBucky has to kidnap you for whatever reason, ransom, to send a message, insert your preference here and he has you tied up in some room of his house. It’s all fine until he hears the scraping of the chair moving against the floor so he, Steve and Sam go over to make sure you’re not trying to escape.
He the closer he gets, the louder the scraping is, he bursts through the door.
“You better not try to lea-what-what the hell are you doing-
You momentarily stop your scooting to look and him and then back at your destination, only to start all over again. You were so close, you didn’t care if your hands were bound, you’d find a way-
“What’s she doing in there” Steve questioned, seeing Bucky run an exasperated hand over his face.
“She’s trying to pet the cat”
“What?”
Bucky stared at you as you finally reached where his very white, very spoiled fur baby was perched. He was so sure she’d try and swat at you, at the very least hiss, after all, she was as picky and grumpy as her daddy-
“Merp” she hopped down to nuzzle against your leg, bumping her head against you with a happy purr. “Meow-
“Alright, that’s enough, Alpine get over here”
The sassy feline gave him a hard stare before reluctantly pulling away and sauntering over, batting his leg before trotting off. He was supposed to be the leader of his gang and meanwhile his hostage was trying to pet his cat who just scolded him after being told to leave.
“Well thanks for that” You gave him an annoyed huff, obnoxiously scooting back to where the chair originally was.
“Brat” Bucky mumbled his breath, biting back the smile that almost made its way to his face.
Not really related to normal post but I just started seeing this guy and he is sooo tall. And the little gremlin in me is loving it. Like he is 6’7 and I am 5’3 (okay actually I’m just under 5’3) so the height difference?!?!
It’s so fanfiction to me and ugh… I should write something with it.
Guys I’m like legitimately sobbing, so my grandmother passed away on Monday and after going through some of her things she apparently still had my grandfathers dog tags from Vietnam. He died twenty years ago and she had lost her memory so she didn’t remember that they were married or him for that matter yet she kept them. Like that is such a tragically beautiful story.
You and Bucky had both been having baby fever. Well to be honest fur baby fever. And so here you and Bucky were, going to the animal shelter.
It was loud and smelled a lot like wet dog, but there was a certain charm about the place. Bucky held your hand in his soft, human one. He gently pulled you along as you walked to the front desk.
The lady at front was sweet and gently pointed you two in the cat direction. (Bucky had had a pet cat when he was little and wanted another kitty.)
The lady chuckled softly as she saw bucky’s eager steps. You squeezed his hand playfully.
“You’re like a kid in a candy store James”
He just playfully rolled his eyes. “I’m just so excited. We get to be cat parents!”
His enthusiasm made you giggle. It was contagious and soon you felt your smile widen.
Bucky pushed open the door and immediately squatted down to look at the cats roaming around. There were several all ranging in size and color.
A light orange cat walked straight past Bucky to the water dish making him laugh. He looked like he was in heaven.
Bucky sat on the ground and began to lightly pet any of the cats that came up to him. Several seemed fascinated with his metal arm.
You laughed as a few cats tried to gnaw on his metal fingers and went to explore the floor.
You began smiling as you saw all the cats interacting with each other.
“Excuse me”
You jumped startled by the noise. The lady from before stood behind you a calm smile on her face.
You blushed and smiled “yes?”
“Is there a specific cat you and your husband are looking for?”
You glanced around the room “my husband has his heart set on a white cat. He had a little kitten when he was a boy and he was solid white.”
The lady’s smile faltered slightly. “Well we do have one. But most people pass her up. She’s been here for a year”
She motioned for you to follow her to the corner. Asleep against the wall was a fluffy white cat. She was beautiful and you couldn’t fathom why anyone wouldn’t want her.
And then you saw it.
You dropped to the floor, squatting next to her as you gasped. “Bucky!”
Bucky’s head perked up at his name. He seemed confused but quickly made his way over to you.
He looked down at the cat and you saw his heart visibly melt when saw.
She only had three legs.
The little cat opened her eyes. They were so pretty and she looked so calm. You gently reached a hand out towards her and held it for her to smell.
She sniffed it and then gave your finger a single lick. You were already in love. And so was Bucky.
He kept looking at her missing back leg. He gently reached out with his metal arm and ran a finger over her hip. She purred slightly.
Bucky smiled. “I think we found our baby”
You giggled “she’s just like daddy.”
Bucky laughed at that. Suddenly his eyes lit up. “We can get matching prosthetics!”
You giggled and the worker laughed. “I’m glad she’ll finally get a happy home”
You turned to her and whispered, careful to not spook the cat. “What’s her name”
Okay so I am definitely an asmr enjoyer. Like I listen to it most nights. Anyway, this got me thinking: imagine reader introducing Bucky to ASMR to help him sleep.
You wake to an arm slapping your stomach causing you to jolt awake. Amid your surprise, you notice bucky’s arm laying across your stomach.
Instead of being sound asleep, he was tossing and turning. Even thrashing.
The sight broke your heart. He said he often had night terrors. This was just the first time you saw one.
You guys had moved in together recently and Bucky was scared that you seeing him vulnerable would make you scare you away. But nothing he could would. You loved him. Even if he didn’t know that yet.
You gently shake him awake. His painful expression being too much for you to take.
Bucky’s eyes shoot open and he sits up in bed breathing heavy.
“What’s wrong? Did I do something? Are you hurt?” His breaths are frantic as he looks at you. His eyes are wide with worry.
“No,” you say softly, “I’m okay.”
He immediately relaxes when he hears you.
You gently reach out and take his hand in yours. “You were having a nightmare”
He looks away ashamed, “Doll… I… well I tried to warn you. I mean… I understand if it’s too much”
You squeeze his hand gently. “No, I can handle it. But are you okay?”
He shrugs “I’m not really ready to talk about this yet. Do you think we can just lay down?”
You nod your head. “Yeah we can do that, and I have an idea that’ll help”
He quirks an eyebrow slightly as he lays back down. His eyebrows furrow even more when you grab your phone and a pair of earbuds.
You plug in the headphones and hand him one of the earbuds, the other one resting in your ear.
“Listen to this, it’s called ASMR. It always helped me sleep when I had bad anxiety. Maybe it can help you too”
Bucky takes the earbud and hesitantly puts it in his ear. As soon as he does he relaxes as the sounds take over.
The video you had selected included soft humming and raindrops. It was incredibly calming. And he loved it.
He roles over and hugs you. His lips press against your forehead in a kiss, “thanks doll”
“You like it?”
He chuckles slightly, his body releasing its built up tension. “I do, thank you”
A/N: I was listening to Marconi Union’s weightless while writing. You know just in case you want the ambiance.
You sit on the floor in a peaceful meditation. Your shoulders relaxing as you inhale and exhale. Bucky sits next to you, his knee touching yours.
He wears a pair of basketball shorts so you feel his warm skin on yours. The connection makes you smile softly. Bucky begins to hum softly as he meditates.
It’s peaceful.
Very peaceful.
And for Bucky, peace is something he craves. So he jumped at the chance to join you on your spa day.
You gently tap his knee with your finger in order to get his attention. He opens one eye, peaking at you.
He gives a crooked smile when he sees your face. “Yeah doll?”
You stand up softly and offer him a hand. “Time for our facials”
Bucky’s smile brightens and he quickly gets to his feet. He had never had a facial before and had been inspecting the mask earlier that day. The green paste was interesting to him. He even smelled it to find that it smelled like cucumber and mint.
He liked the smell.
You giggle as you take Bucky to the bathroom. “Okay baby sit on the chair, I’ll get the brush”
He happily obliges, allowing himself to get comfortable in the plush chair. It’s soft, and smells like you.
You return with a green stained brush and the jar. You lightly dip the brush in the jar gathering a dollop on the bristles.
Softly, you brush the substance on his face. It’s cool on his skin making him relax even more.
“That feels nice doll”
You giggle, “with your super soldier stamina you always run hot. Sooo that makes sense”
He chuckles at your remark. He continue to lather the mask on his face.
You set down the brush and cheekily sneak a kiss causing him to laugh. He reaches up to touch the mask that got on your nose.
He smears it a little bit and gives you a wink. “You’re turn now doll”
He switches places with you and grabs the brush. In the most gentle of motions he applies the mask to your face. The entire time smiling at how beautiful you look.
Once he finishes he gently sets the jar aside. He offers you his hand and laces your fingers together. His smile is the biggest you’ve ever seen.
And unbeknownst to you, that was the moment Bucky decided he would marry you.
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