A Semi-AI Generated story.
Messed around with https://app.inferkit.com/demo for a bit in an attempt to generate my generations ‘Ulysses’. With some occasional prodding along, the AI produced this masterpiece that could rival Garfield or Karma Sutra in quality.
Enjoy this nonsense!
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Once upon a time there lived a fella named Charlie.
He was an average guy, tall and skinny, like the kind of guy who can stand on the side of a mountain without wanting to pitch forward and vomit.
He had kind of a jaundiced, unhealthy complexion, the kind of looks you would get after consuming live hornets after ingesting 2.31Kw of meth.
Charlie was about 5 '11 ", mostly bald, with some flop - horns and a goatee that he kept trimmed short with a pair of kitchen scissors.
Charlie worked at the liquor store on Main Street in downtown Noo Yawkh, which was the cooler New York. One day, Bubsy the Bobcat entered the store while Charlie was on shift and said "I'd like some maple syrup please." Charlie replied, "Aww, Bubsy, I ain't gonna give you none of my money. You ate up the last batch of syrup I had last week, and that's the last time you're ever gonna insult my livelihood you white son of a bitch!" Charlie pulled out his shotgun from behind the bar and loaded it. "Bubsy, it's gonna cost you two dollars for the maple syrup. Get out of here!"
Bubsy threw a bag of groceries at Charlie and said "Give me the damn syrup or I'll start eating your water bottle collection!"
"Fine," said Charlie, and walked out the door with Bubsy in pursuit.
Charlie climbed to the top of a tall building, and Bubsy ran up after him. They were both yelling obscenities at each other when suddenly Dan Aykroyd appeared from out of nowhere between the two warring brothers. "Stay right there," said Dan, "I am going to whip your ass!"
Dan pulled out his chainsaw and pulled it down through Charlie's body, then continued on. Dan stood up and said "Okay, okay, you're both grounded!"
Bubsy picked up the empty Maple syrup can from the floor and threw it at Dan's head.
Dan caught it, tossed it in the air, caught it again, then threw it right at Bubsy's head. Bubsy leaped back and fell off the Bempire State Building with his tail between his legs. Dan continued on, leaving Bubsy's lumbering corpse behind.
Dan looked at the blazing star coming toward him and said "Haha, Dan Aykroyd. That son of a bitch just proved you can't beat me with a Dan Aykroyd". Dan Aykroyd then turned into glitter, his particles blown away by the wind, never to be seen again.
Charlie collapsed and died at the foot of the building, his body mutilated by the chainsaw and his skin sliced open from head to toe.
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