Hydro Dragon, Hydro Dragon, Don't Cry

I found myself when I lost my faith // Because she was brave, and smart, and most of all, lucky. // I aim to misbehave

[koiagain]

im going to fix my entire life

[fruitcakebro]

When?

[koiagain]

Like Um. later

[depsidase]

[toskarin]

one of my favourite human songs-and-dances is when someone notices someone else is lying and, for no particular reason besides love of the game, helps them get away with the lie without ever explicitly acknowledging they noticed. nightmare social animals.

[valtsv]

we need to bring back the phrase "what business is it of yours" in a big way i'm serious

[valtsv]

i know you can just say "none of your business" but phrasing it as a question with a jarringly formal tone is the ideal way to shoot an overfamiliar unwelcome overture dead in its tracks and force the person making it to confront the boundaries they're taking for granted + it would really piss people off which is funny

[valtsv]

&also it allows you to experience the joy of talking like an autistic vampire, which i highly recommend

[maniatown]

Girl whose most frequent mistake is inaction voice: wow I keep making mistakes I better not do anything

[aurawra21]

TIL THE BED BREAKS

[angelgirlxxxxxxx]

[imactuallyagiraffe]

no i am not immune to early 2000s pop-punk music that fucks a little harder than everyone likes to admit

[oddarette]

Gumballbasaur 🩷✨

[asteroidtroglodyte]

Which Yankee stereotype applies to you? (non-Yanks welcome)

Golly do I love Big Drink

Cheeseburger is a food group, right?

Guns. Lots of Guns!

Fluorescent Blonde (store-bought is fine)

I don’t have to be a Rancher to dress like a Cowboy

My Truck is my legs, and I gots big legs

YOU COULD SAY I’M SOMEWHAT LOUD

I’ll smile at a Stranger, just you watch 😁

I am not even an honorary Yank (see results)

Voting ended onJun 13

[molotovbarbie]

- drive ~40 min to brunch with my parents, one of my lil bros, and my grandparents who just got into town.

- place my mom chose doesn't have brunch at that location.

- drive 10 min to another place and actually have brunch (including a double bloody Mary).

- otw home husband's car breaks down.

- we decide it'll be just as long and hot to wait for an Uber in the middle of the road as to walk home.

- walk ~3 miles in a skirt and boots with a heavy purse and no water bottle on a piece of avocado toast and a double shot of vodka in the dirt on the side of roads.

[indigosfindings]

i really like this thing where websites will have separate "log in" & "sign up" buttons and if you click "log in" it takes you to a sign-up screen anyway so you have to click "i already have an account" and then it will ask if you want to sign in with your facebook account or with instagram or linkedin or deviantart or whatever, and if you choose "username & password" it asks if you want to put in your username or use your thumbprint, and once you put your username & password it emails you a confirmation code, and once you put in the code it says "do you want to give us your phone number for future sign-ins? do you want to sign up for facial recognition? do you want to give us your bones? give us your fucking bones?

[girlballs-archive]

websites prior to like the 2010s: sign in with your username and password

websites now:

[molotovbarbie]

Google how to tell your partner he'd be a really good dad when neither of you want kids but you feel he deserves to know it bc damn

[molotovbarbie]

Ohhhhhhh wait I forgor we're both eldest siblings. You're the best older brother and a fisherman recognizes another fisherman but one who's better.

[molotovbarbie]

Also this is about how our baby girl cat developed catbox anxiety bc her younger alpha brother became unchecked due to our senior cat having to be unexpectedly put down when he was the apparent literal anchor of this house

[molotovbarbie]

Google how to tell your partner he'd be a really good dad when neither of you want kids but you feel he deserves to know it bc damn

[molotovbarbie]

Ohhhhhhh wait I forgor we're both eldest siblings. You're the best older brother and a fisherman recognizes another fisherman but one who's better.

[molotovbarbie]

Google how to tell your partner he'd be a really good dad when neither of you want kids but you feel he deserves to know it bc damn

[krasnoarmeyets]

imo the state monitoring your private messages is basically on the same level as opening and reading physical mail or perhaps breaking into your house to install bugs and cameras

[cuppydogshane]

My Name is 8 PM. and I am always arriving when you atrent Looking