Just so done with myself.

Not Gonna be posting art on here anymore, if you wanna see my art check out my Insta @apricot_punch_ or my art acc @zlinkies_

[glumshoe]

I made some ASMR ambient atmosphere mixes for your highly specific needs

1.) Haunted campout in a northern forest where strange beasts lurk in the distance and whispers of the unquiet dead keep you awake through the long dark night  2.) The Joker is probably getting ready to murder you horribly in an abandoned warehouse 3.) Killer Croc hunts you through the Gotham sewers, occasionally eating corpses  4.) Man has pleasant vanilla sex with a monster in cheap motel bed 5.) You’re the last gunslinger marching across a dreary wasteland after the world has moved on, pursuing the man in black across the desert while the machines of the old world still hum their death throes

[glumshoe]

6.) woman flees across frozen tundra from evil mechanical whales from another dimension 7.) frightend young boy is chased through forest by the Wild Hunt and their eldritch hounds

[glumshoe]

8.) Baba Yaga has kidnapped you and prepares to cannibalize you as part of a hearty and well-balanced meal  9.) Drinking a stolen soda at the bottom of the Mariana Trench and burping from the highly-pressurized gas 10.) mute woman has quiet sexy encounter with an amphibious monster in an aquarium 11.)  n00b necromancer digs up bones from a church graveyard for the first time, crying with guild and anxiety as angry spirits murmur in anger at her trespassing

[glumshoe]

12.) Hiding scared and alone in the dark as the fabric of reality is unwoven by interdimensional forces beyond our understanding, and the world as we know it comes to a dark and brutal end 13.) Amateur cryptid-hunter hikes alone through woods on a breezy summer’s day, searching for evidence of the paranormal and oblivious to danger 14.) lesbian lumberjack chops down tree in the early morning while thinking dreamily about her new wife

[motherapricot]

I only got a few follwers on here, but

I won’t be posting any stuff on my tumblr, if you wanna see some of my art check out my insta Apricot_Jelly_Jams. You can still use tumblr to contact me tho, I dont always have wifi so instas dms would be unreliable with me

[makingqueerhistory]

I know you don't normally answer questions, or at least I haven't seen to many. But I was curious as to your stance on historical figures that were queer but not of moral standing. Ex. Alexander Hamilton was most likely bisexual or something of that configuration, but was also a slave owner. I see a lot of lgbt+ historical icons, who are "Disqualified" because of something they did. I was just wondering how you felt about it (1/2)

(2/2) Personally, I think their being a lgbt+ historical figure should be acknowledged, but so should their downfalls so they won’t become an icon per se. I’m not really too sure how to verbalize my thoughts, but I hope that was somewhat coherent. And I’m just wondering what you as queer historians have to say on the matter

First I want to say that you did a great job of verbalizing your thoughts and I really appreciate you coming to our project to discuss this because we do have some thoughts and this is an interesting topic overall. 

We discussed this briefly in our most recent article Annemarie Schwarzenbach. 

In discussing her life we note this concept briefly saying: 

“We know there have been queer people who are horrible, in fact we need to look no further than one generation above Annemarie herself. Her mother, a queer woman who actively supported Nazi’s. Queer history is not clean. It is not simple, or easy, or always on the right side of the battle. Like all of history it is complex.”

And today actually I saw someone do the exact thing you were talking about in a post saying:

“can we all just pretend james buchanan wasn’t gay, i don’t want him”

So this is a real thing, and it is actually something we have dealt with a lot in our writing. In the post above I don’t think the person was seriously saying that we should pretend this historical figure isn’t queer, I believe from context and tone it is probably just a person who is venting and wants their community to be full of unproblematic people. 

But that very idea, even in a joking tone, is harmful and we should unpack it and want to thank you for giving us the opportunity to do so. 

So to begin, this phenomenon has many origins but one of the big ones is probably peoples desire to turn history into a series of Great Men. And while this theory is not directly discussing what we are about to, we believe it to be a factor in the problem. Because in the end both of these problems find their roots in attempts to simplify complex concepts/events/people in history. 

We want history to be easy, we want to look at a person and say “this person is Bad and I am in no way connected to them because I am Not Bad” but that isn’t what history is. 

History is endlessly complex, confusing, and at times frustrating. And these are often seen as “bad” emotions so we try to squish history down into more bite sized concepts so we don’t have to feel them. Make history into this battle between good and evil, where everything is simple and easily understood. 

So when people look into the history of a community, they use its members to “prove” whether the community was good or bad. Which leads to communities trying to repress the more nasty parts of their history. 

And Making Queer History is not immune to this. In fact it is something I often think about, and have in many cases failed in. I am a writer, and I do my best writing when I care about the people/subject I am discussing. So I am more likely to choose to write about someone I like than someone I don’t. 

An example of this happened last week actually. I had been thinking about this exact concept and to attempt to stop it from affecting our project too much I tried to write about Salvador Dali. A man from history I hate. And I cried.

Legitimately, I got so mad while researching this man I began crying, and I ended up writing about someone else. 

And while I did not actively deny that Salvador Dali was queer, I did in a small way contribute to the problem that leads people to do that kind of thing. 

We want to see the good side of a community we are a part of because if the community isn’t perfect our minds try to simplify that into the community is bad. So many people either react by deciding the community is bad, or by rejecting the person who stops the community from being perfect from the community, and neither of those responses are healthy. 

So yes, you are right. Denying that the “bad people” in history could have also been queer, is not accurate or good for the community as a whole. It is denying facts, it is removing nuance, and it is damaging how we view ourselves as a community.

Because when we remove these people from our history we absolve ourselves of their problems. In the case of Alexander Hamilton, we remove a racist man from our communities history because we don’t want to think about how our community has had (and still has) a problem with racism.

I like to say that just because there have been queer people who have done bad things in history, does not mean that being queer is what made them bad. But it also goes the other way, just because queer people have done amazing things in history, does not mean that we are as a whole an amazing community.

We have problems that we need to address from our history that have carried on into our present, and pretending they were not a part of our history is just another way of denying they could be a part of our present. So we need to look at these “bad people”, so we can address the problems that we had, and how we in our community can try to prevent those problems in the future.

The queer community is not inherently good or bad, because the queer community is made up of people, and each person has negative aspects and positive aspects that they bring to the table. And the community is just in the end a jumble of all of these positive and negative aspects. And the sooner we acknowledge that the sooner we can move to the next step making an environment that supports change and growth with education, and positive and negative reinforcement, instead of just throwing every person who does something wrong out of the community. 

There have been great people in our community, and there have been horrible people, and we need to look at people on either side of the spectrum, and in the middle. Because history is endlessly complex, confusing, and at times frustrating, but that is a good thing because humans are too.

[shacklefunk-deactivated20220623]

listen ive only just seen suicide squad so im very late to the bandwagon but heres some thoughts:

it is INEXCUSABLY terrible, as in there is no excuse for a bunch of professionals getting together and somehow producing this godless mistake. it seriously feels like i should be able to swat will smith with a rolled up newspaper over this movie

even knowing what i now know about what happened with the final edit of the film, i dont even think that good editing would have saved it. im reasonably certain that even the original cut of the film was a worthless sack of shit, so mostly the fucking RANDOM editing is just really funny. like it quickly changes time of day and location so incomprehensibly that you can never tell where the movie is taking place or how much time has passed, which is just BASIC movie continuity that they couldnt keep up. i kept catching myself seeing the sky go from nigh to day over and over and i realize thats an editing mistake but it is an EGREGIOUS editing mistake

the entire “suicide squad” plan and execution is so laughably bad that it is not even REASONABLY within the scope of superhero movie badness. it is not even believable that an actual fucking dipshit would even come up with this plan, because even a dipshit would be like, “hey, this seems like a bad idea?” it is so bad, and poorly thought out, and a stretch that a human adult would come up with it, that i GENUINELY that that the “mean woman” in the red coat who orchestrated it was working for the joker. it was SO UNFATHOMABLY BAD A PLAN that i literally thought it was just a way to bust all the villains out and get another movie. but no apparently it was legitimate and people in the government in gotham, real adult humans, thought this was okay. alright. sure. no wonder gotham needs batman, it is apparently run by a bunch of absolute fucking neanderthals

i mean the continuity errors were so painfully egregious, i just,,,,it was so bad. it was so bad, you guys !

the joker was terrible. i mean i dont think i need to say anything that hasnt already been said. on top of Not Being The Joker, he just wasn’t even scary or edgy like he was trying to be. there are cartoon iterations of the joker that are scarier and have more personality than this fuckign. abomination. like ive seen some rly good, spooky jokers with a lot of charm and a lot of scares and this was Not That

i spent half the movie wondering ‘why isn’t the joker in this movie?” even when the joker was on screen doing things

none of the characters make sense. they spend about a third of the movie with this incredibly slow, unnecessary series of introductions for them that go on for WAY too long (like, seriously, things in this “”Action Movie””” do not even begin to actually Happen until its almost over) and then do not have them do or say anything aligned with their characters at all. so by the end you dont know their names outside of deadshot and harley quinn, and killer croc i guess, who does absolutely nothing in the entire movie. no, seriously. he doesnt do anything. they have a crocodile man in an action movie who eats people and he doesnt do anything. hes barely in the background in some shots. he doesnt eat anyone, and probably has 3 total lines of dialogue. thats that

wanting to fuck a pink unicorn isnt even edgy any more, snyder, you pile of cocaine with a rat face attached to it. thats tame. get better material. you arent funny.

they had opportunities for the movie to be funny and somehow missed them completely, like. all possible comedy beats were missed, so the movie wasn’t funny Or charming OR even suitably violent to be enjoyable

oh yeah why is this movie rated pg-13. if were gonna spend an hour and a half with a bunch of serial killers and its NOT gonna be cartoony and funny, how the hell ?? are you going to pass them off as a credible threat when they cant kill anyone, be violent, or say fuck ???? as a result the fucking Hardened Criminals never actually do any Bad Things, we’re just expected to KNOW theyre badass bc they have cool music playing over them not doing anything. like, ok. sure.

like for an action movie, there is no action. for a comedy, there is no comedy. all laughs derived from the movie were from me screaming at it so loudly that my voice gave out and i collapsed, ready to die

im not a huge fan of marvel OR DC, but I feel like they really fucked DC fans here. like, seriously. im not even super familiar with the DC characters and the entire movie I was like They Wouldnt Do That. even if you love the characters you will walk away disappointed bc they fuck that up So Bad

the bad guys dont do bad guy things, which was entirely what we were all here to see them do.

you can tell the entire plot of the movie after the first like 15 minutes. enchantress is bad, underdeveloped side characters to fake some kind of emotional investment, etc etc. blah i dont even remember their names and they were the entire emotional crutch for the whole movie. enchantress was horrifically flaccid as a villain

im serious when i say that bad editing was not the death of this movie. people who say “oh its the editing” are wrong. the editing is a fucking nightmare, yeah, but the movie has NO redeemable qualities. what so ever. at most, fixing the editing might raise it from absolutely horrible to disappointingly mediocre, but is that really the standard we wanna set?

batman is in the movie for .5 seconds and he immediately does something batman would never do

why does deadshot not act like deadshot

why does harley quinn not act like harley quinn (also, why cant the actress playing her pull of her voice quirks/accent at all? sometimes she sounds southern, sometimes the accent is absent completely, like,,was nobody gonna be like, “hey lady, maybe we should do, i dunno, one more fucking take, and u could say it RIGHT this time”??)

my roommate called the joker “sex voldemort” which is apt. thats basically what youre in for with this joker. sex voldemort.

anyway it was a godless atrocity and im glad its in the past. i had honestly even held out hope that the point of the movie would be that the suicide squad plan, being so bad, would blow up in everyones faces and unleash hell onto the streets of gotham because that might be, i dunno, fun or interesting, but at the end they all go back to prison and dont even get to wreak mass havoc at all

no seriously

its a movie where nothing happens. you dont know whats going on, the characters are all wrong and poorly written. like. its an action movie and theres barely even any action at all

it fails on EVERY LEVEL. theres not a single part of it that i would pick out and be like “this is okay.” every single thing about it fails, even the shit that LOOKs like it might have potential at first, bc all of the ideas are bad. its just a bad idea movie from the ground up. it progresses more like bad crack fic than a film made by real adult humans. 2/10, would recommend if you like to scream angrily for hours

tl;dr: go see lego batman it looks so much better im serious i dont even care that much abt batman and i am so fucking hype for lego batman please watch the trailer if you havent seen it already it looks so good

[dbttiger]

[thgchoir]

no offense but this is literally the most neurotypical thing i have ever seen

[pyrrhicgoddess-deactivated20180]

Uhhhh… no. This is what they teach you in therapy to deal with BPD and general depression. When I got out of the hospital after hurting myself a second time, I got put into intensive outpatient program for people being released from mental hospitals as a way to monitor and help transition them into getting them efficient long-term care. This is something they stressed, especially for people with general depression. When you want to stay at home and hide in your bed, forcing yourself to do the opposite is what is helpful. For me, who struggles with self harm- “I want to really slice my arm up. The opposite would be to put lotion on my skin (or whatever would be better, like drawing on my skin) the opposite is the better decision.” It doesn’t always work because of course mental health isn’t that easy, but this is part of what’s called mindfulness (they say this all the time in therapy)

Being mindful of these is what puts you on the path to recovery. If you’re mindful, you are able to live in that moment and try your best to remember these better options.

I swear to god, I don’t get why some people on this website straight up reject good recovery help like this because either they a)have never been in therapy so don’t understand in context how to use these coping tactics. Or b)want to insist that all therapists and psych doctors are neurotypical and have zero idea what they are talking about. (Just so ya know, they teach this in DBT, the therapy used to help BPD. The psychologist who came up with DBT actually had BPD, so….a neurotypical women didn’t come up with this.)

[greenjudy]

I have clinical OCD and for me, exposure therapy–a version of “do the opposite”–has been fundamental. I’ve had huge improvement in the last year, but I’m 100% clear that if I hadn’t done my best to follow this protocol I’d be fucked. I have a lot of empathy for that moment when you’re just too tired to fight and you check the stove or you wash your hands or go back to the office at midnight to make sure the door is locked. But the kind of therapeutic approach outlined above has been crucial for me. 

It’s hard to do. I’ve weathered panic attacks trying to follow this protocol. But I’ve gotten remarkable results. I was afraid to touch the surfaces in my house, okay? I was afraid to touch my own feet, afraid to touch my parrot–deliberately exposing myself to “contamination” has helped me heal. I can’t speak for people with other issues, but this has helped my anxiety and OCD. 

[cameoamalthea]

I feel that tumblr, in an effort to be accepting of mental illness, has become anti-recovery. Having a mental illness does not make you a bad person. There is nothing morally wrong with having a mental illness anymore than more than there’s something morally wrong with having the flu. However, if you’re “ill” physically or mentally, something is wrong in the sense that you are unwell and to alleviate that you should try to get better. While there is not “cure” for mental illness, there are ways to get better.

There was a post on tumblr where someone with ADHD posted about how much you can get done when you focus and was attacked for posting about being “nuerotypical” - when she was posting about the relief she got from being on an medication to treat her illness. 

I saw another post going around tumblr that said something along the line of “you control your thoughts, why not choose to have happy thoughts” which again was shot down as “nuerotypical” but while you don’t have control over what thoughts come into your mind, you absolutely can and should choose to have happy thoughts. In DBT we call this “positive self talk”.

I’m in DBT to help treat PTSD stemming from child abuse. The abuse and abandonment I experienced destroyed my self esteem and created a lot of anxiety over upsetting other people. DBT has taught me to recognize when my thoughts are distorting realty ‘no one likes you’ and answer back ‘plenty of people like you, you don’t need everyone to like you, especially if the relationship doesn’t make you happy’, to respond to the thought ‘I’m so worthless’ with ‘you’re really great and have accomplished something’ 

And it’s not easy to challenge your thoughts, it’s a skill that’s learned and it’s hard to force yourself to think something that doesn’t seem authentic or even seems wrong to think - it’s hard to be encouraging towards yourself when you hate yourself - but you force yourself to be aware of your thoughts and push back when you fall into unhealthy patterns 

That isn’t “so neurotypical” that’s recovery. 

Not shaming mental illness doesn’t mean shaming RECOVERY.

Pro-Recovery isn’t anti-disability. 

Do not shame healthy behaviors as “neurotypical”.

Learning healthy behaviors and taking steps to treat mental illness and disorders including taking medication if that’s what works for you is important. You shouldn’t be ashamed if you have mental illness, but you shouldn’t say ‘well I’m not neurotypical therefor I can’t do anything to get better’ - while there is no cure for mental illness, there is a lot you can do to get better, to function better, to manage your mental illness and be safer, happier, and healthier for it. 

[laxxin-deactivated20170324]

DO NOT SHAME HEALTHY BEHAVIORS AS “NEUROTYPICAL”.

[amythe3lder]

I have social anxiety, among other things. I was terrified to talk to anyone new for years. So I started going to cons and staying too busy to notice that I was nervous af. Immersion one one’s own terms is invaluable as a tool.  I think the assumption some people make about therapy is that recovery is to make us easier to deal with, and no, it’s more like adjusting your diet if you have diabetes. I am trying to get better because my illnesses are fatal if left untreated.

[notanadult]

As someone with recurring major depression and anxiety, I’ve spent a lot of years in therapy. Medication quite often has some nasty side-effects for me (but hey, it’s developing all the time so I remain open to it) but what’s really proved effective is therapy to teach me behavioural changes that help me manage. When I was in therapy, I was SO RESENTFUL of my therapist as she told me to go out and do stuff, and spend 20 minutes cleaning up and eat something with vegetables and smile at three people a day. And then she said two things that changed me “Look, form follows function.” I said “Uh?” She said “If you go to the gym and lift heavy weights, your muscles get bigger as a response. What I’ve observed in people with depression and anxiety is that they get into a rut and can’t help themselves get out. By acting like you haven’t got depression and anxiety, you’re lifting yourself out of the rut and forcing yourself onto a new track. In time, your brain will go down those paths less often because it gets positive feedback from the acting. You smile at people, ok, maybe two out of three don’t smile back but one does! You clean your room, you don’t spend that 40 minutes in frustration looking for clean clothes. Fake it until you make it.” It’s not an immediate payoff, and sometimes you may need a little extra help from medication but I promise you that it does work. You do start to feel better.

[feraldavestrider]

new cool meme: find out what each of ur names mean and then shove them together

im white enchantress woman who works with stone

[novatoast]

a remark on god’s promise

[enbyleighlines]

I’m courteous crown of laurel

[motherapricot]

Messenger of God Pearl Frisbie. Fuckin spectacular, there is no meaning to the last name Frisbie.

[motherapricot]

Alright, apparently there was a Frisbie Pie Company???? And kids would flatten and use the pie tins as frisbees???? And after the factory shut down a toy company saw what the college kids were doing??? And then marketed it but changed the name to Frisbee? Alright. Thanks OP, just got a lil history lesson on some unknown family. 

[feraldavestrider]

new cool meme: find out what each of ur names mean and then shove them together

im white enchantress woman who works with stone

[novatoast]

a remark on god’s promise

[enbyleighlines]

I’m courteous crown of laurel

[motherapricot]

Messenger of God Pearl Frisbie. Fuckin spectacular, there is no meaning to the last name Frisbie.

[moonsdesigns]

*the above Blue, Green, and Yellow photos are color-corrected renders, but are based off the chosen material’s color.

It’s finally here. Your chance to win 1 free Voltron Hoodie! Your choice of color, your choice of size, entirely free! The giveaway is in hopes of raising awareness and creating hype for Dreamwork’s Voltron Legendary Defender Season 2 set to release January 20th to Netflix.

For more info on the jackets, please see my posts for Red Paladin and Black Paladin. 

★ Reblogs count as 1 entry

★ Likes count as 1 entry

★ 2 entries allowed per account

★ No Giveaway Blogs!

[moonsdesigns]

*the above Blue, Green, and Yellow photos are color-corrected renders, but are based off the chosen material’s color.

It’s finally here. Your chance to win 1 free Voltron Hoodie! Your choice of color, your choice of size, entirely free! The giveaway is in hopes of raising awareness and creating hype for Dreamwork’s Voltron Legendary Defender Season 2 set to release January 20th to Netflix.

For more info on the jackets, please see my posts for Red Paladin and Black Paladin. 

★ Reblogs count as 1 entry

★ Likes count as 1 entry

★ 2 entries allowed per account

★ No Giveaway Blogs!

[motherapricot]

Win A Gristmas Mystery Box O' Gifts

This is a mystery box full of mystery items that are pretty cool because they are Homestuck items and all... LOOT!

YOOOO, Homestuck shit for anyone interested.

[motherapricot]

[poinsciuri]

all the homestuck girls are witches

[poinsciuri]

someone please reblog this with headcanons of how each girl practices their craft

[motherapricot]

Rose: She already does a lot of magicy stuff in the comic but I like to think she’d dabble a little in everything. She’d pray a lot to ancient gods, with obvious leanings towards lovecraftian lore  and meditate to try and astral project. I imagine she’d also be the kind of witch that uses a lot of candles and incense. Partially for the aesthetic, but also because it just smells really nice. 

Jade: I saw a jadekin blogger mention how they liked to dabble in it but got distracted a lot which is very Jade. I also think what she learned she probably heard from Rose who taught it to her so she too dabbled here and there, but sometimes forgot stuff or it just never really stuck. But she’d really like to use crystals, as there were a ton around her island of all different sorts and varieties. She’d prob send a few too Rose too. 

Jane: I baking witch for lack of a better word, lol, big surprise there I’m sure. She’d incorporate her magic into her baking by maybe saying little incantations while making it, or putting spices, seasonings and herbs to help give the desired affect of what she wants. She’d also mainly use it to help out her friends. Someone complaining of backpains? Better whip up some cinnamon and ginger cookies. She’d use it for anything and everything too, be it minor or major. 

Roxy: Like Rose she’d try a lot of different stuff (when she and rose reunited rose taught her a lil about astral projecting and Roxy would try to meet cat goddesses like Bastet) , but she’d really favor palm reading, tarot cards and Ouija boards and other “party trick” magic stuff. She’d be really silly about it, and use it during sleepovers and stuff, or whip out her cards to make a quick buck. But if someone was really distressed or upset or in need of help and guidance, she’d read their palm or pull out her cards and gently tell them what she sees. She’d be very serious and caring about it too. 

(Feel free any other peeps to add on any headcanons to my addition, especially if they contradict. I’m gonna hopefully start working on the HS trolls now)

[unicornfan]

i think a more interesting question than “when did you ‘join’ the internet” is “what was the first username you ever used”

my very first ever username (that i remember) was HunterKiller75 cause i thought starcraft was the coolest shit in elementary school & hydralisks were my fav unit, and 75 was my fav number

[vigaishere]

REBLOG if you have amazing talented artist friends!

[adriofthedead]

[tinysupervicki]

YESSSSS

[lazy--tuesday-deactivated201806]

@cute-moka-chan

[shersref]

@motherapricot

[motherapricot]

@sherscribbles, FUCK U BITCH, I LOVE YOU

[sherscribbles-deactivated202212]

Quick sketches of some cool people from @one-way-ride-to-hell ’s party ft. @motherapricot

[westfailia-deactivated20240822]

so we all know now all posts and blogs with the word lesbian in their content or description are filtered as nsfw right?

but you know what isn’t?

[westfailia-deactivated20240822]

you know what else isn’t filtered?

[redstarovermoundcity]

@staff why are you so fucking disgusting?

[shjiyemis]

Almost finished,,,,,, I’m crying I’ll finish tomorrow definitely

(They/them)