Im A Slut For The Best Memes

just trying my okayest but i dont tag anything and its to late to start and im crying send help 🏳️‍⚧️he/him 2004 baby Actively Killling All Doves +18 only yall

[staff]

[estrogenpatchnotes]

What the fuck is wrong with you people

[blelbinems-deactivated20190925]

[habitualshaker]

actually this is the only good thing staff has ever done

[thereddestpotato]

I would like this animation every time I log on

[rawme-price]

Being roommates with soap means he gets to hear every part of your life, and vice versa.

Every weekend when you're both able to, you buy takeout and gossip. Soap fills you in on the ongoing bet about when exactly ghost will realize gaz has been flirting with him for weeks, and you fill him in on your recent bedmates without noticing how jealous he is everytime you talk about them.

Right now, fore example, he's working very hard not to snap his chopsticks while you tell him about the guy you hooked up with two days ago. You wake a hand dramatically "like, I get that I'm into older men, don't get me wrong– but usually they can keep up with me!"

"What? Finally sent one into cardiac arrest?" Soap raises a brow teasingly, then adds "so what happened?"

"Nothing!" You toss your hands up, every bit dramatic and charming as you always are "why?! Because he couldn't get it up!!"

"Yikes." Soap mumbles more for the cue to continue, quietly thinking he'd never have an issue getting going if you'd let him–

"Which, isn't usually a problem, it happens yknow? But he was such an ass–" you scowl at the memory, takeout box crinkling slightly from how hard you hold it. Soap frowns too, mostly because he hates knowing someone you trusted to sleep with was mean, "he blamed me! Me! Said I didn't work hard enough!"

From the many, many, detailed accounts soap has heard from you he knows that isn't true. He's had dreams of you sucking him off from how often you talk about it. "What a cunt," soap sneers, knocking his shoulder with yours "bet his profile sucked too."

"It did! But he was nice, so I took a chance. Here, I'll show you–" you reach across the spread of food to grab your phone, settling back practically tucked into soaps side to show him your screen "here, look."

Soap leans over your shoulder, ready to verbally tear this man to shreds like you and him often do only–

John Price, 47.

Not looking for anything serious.

Soap coughs, doubles over choking on his food–

"Holy shit–! Are you okay? Johnny?" You gasp, slapping him on the back until he stops making concerning wheezes.

"That...that's my captain–"

"....oh shit, really?" You look back at the profile. Technically you never ended anything for good with him, just told him to fix his attitude. "Should I go back and bet blackmail?"

Soap starts wheezing again.

[petitelappin]

This child who came to my house tonight is literally the funniest human being on the planet. She complimented me on having both lollipops and mini Three Musketeers available because "a lot of houses these days don't give you a fruit flavor option." She was very solemn about this.

[shottxyz]

[grimmzee]

another request - Ghost blanket burrito

[mumblesplash]

actually while i’ve still got this soapbox stuck to my shoe i also wanna say i think culturally we gotta start conceptualizing physical fitness as a productive hobby rather than an obligation

[mumblesplash]

it’s sort of like clothes. there’s a baseline level of involvement with clothing necessary to stay safe from the elements and participate in society. having a variety of different clothing isn’t *strictly* necessary but pretty tangibly helpful. knowing how to do some minor mending and tailoring is nice. once you get into sewing your own clothes, you’re in hobby territory. if you’re making your own textiles from scratch, that is not only definitely a hobby but not something you can expect other people to want to do

the sort of nonsense fitness influencers get up to is sort of like people showing off their homemade silkworm farm and then pointing at everyone else and going “what’s YOUR excuse for wearing a TSHIRT from the STORE???” and actually nvm that would be fucking hilarious. god i wish that was an actual thing can you imagine

[mumblesplash]

that’s what i’m talking about!!!!!

[johnny-depp-is-loved]

[vitariesocks]

just received the best text message I’ve ever had. from my mom

[vitariesocks]

2 pics. no caption

[shaeeldera]

I had to draw this beautiful lady

[rawme-price]

Of the many things you've said about your lieutenant, ghost, never once would you have expected to say he's...shockingly good with babies.

"Hey lil' man," ghost coos to the baby sat in his lap, happily chewing on the ear of a snoopy plush with a tiny fist wrapped around ghosts pinky. "Having fun? Thinking up some big things, I'm sure."

It looks comical how small a normal, healthy baby looks in his lap. Little arms waving absolutely while it turns to look at ghosts unmasked face. Baby doesn't cry, only stares up at ghost before exclaiming "ahh!! Babbfaaahh!!"

Ghost, he only laughs and holds baby up in his palms so baby can touch all over his scarred face. Little excited "ah ah ah"s and random giggling interspersed whenever ghost pulled a funny face.

"Smart fella, ain't you?" Ghost snorts, sets baby back down to chew on snoopy. He's got this soft, sappy expression on his face. Looks so natural with a baby in his arms. You can't help but snap a few photos.

Next time you baby sit, you'll ask your cousin about letting the twins stay over. You have a strange feeling ghost would love a princess fairy teaparty.

[fullmetalwindbreaker]

[lakevida]

[thequeeninyellowlace]

[voidsetup1]

nothing here to run from

[notsoheterosapien]

INSANE!!! BEAUTIFUL AMAZE AMAZE AMAZE

[cyberjock-deactivated20250329]

[moddys-personal-stuff]

then what

[cyberjock-deactivated20250329]

[moddys-personal-stuff]

oh

[mishi264]

Beach day for the 141!! 🏝️☀️🌊

Since summer is nearly over for me and I’ve been seeing beach fanart, I got inspired and out of artblock hoorayy

[anarchomikeism]

[ancaporado]

[wageronvoluntaryism]

Never forget what they took from us.

[wageronvoluntaryism]

For those asking how it compares today

[cheese-sample-official]

and also

[bmxpotato]

Mid-year 2026 update (this is without tax):

[slightlyirritable]

Remember this the next time someone argues that raising the minimum wage will raise prices

[bethanyactually]

to be clear, the U.S. federal minimum wage in 1999 was $5.15/hour, so a worker who made the minimum wage could buy the items on that receipt with 41 minutes of work.

in 2026, the federal minumum wage is $7.25, so a worker who makes minimum wage would have to work 95 minutes--more than twice as long--to buy those same items.

[rawme-price]

John "I should be more than enough for you," price who gets all huffy and insecure when he finds out his younger partner is using a dildo. He won't outright compare it to cheating, but he'll make snide remarks about you making him feel less than. The only way he accepts it is if you get one modeled exactly after him, and even then only use it when he's deployed.

Vs

Simon "please please just get a toy–" riley who simply cannot keep up with your libido or stamina. He's long since come to terms with his erectile dysfunction and is more than happy strap whatever toy you want to his thigh and let you go. It took him forever to convince you it wouldn't hurt his feelings, and in the end he had to purchase a few for you to really drive the point home.

Inspired by [this] post by @quarterlifekitty go read it rn

[rawme-price]

No thoughts just box jellyfish!reader working with the 141, right?

An oddity even amongst hybrids, your particular type of presentation had thousands of singers developing in your skin. Each one loaded with the poison to stop a mans heart. Otherwise, you look completely normal, the perfect weapon to do some real damage on missions.

Of course, this also means you get certain...privileges, on base.

No one dares to bother you, not with the government-mandated patch on your uniform at all times. A large warning symbol indicating harm at contact. Sure, you make sure every inch of your skin is covered, but no one takes a chance.

You spend nearly your entire military career unbothered by people so long as you get the job done.

Until you meet ghost.

Giant of a man, he towers over people in a distinctly hybrid way, though you can't tell what he is. He's a goddamn pain in your side. Doesn't hesitate to grab you, always pushing you to train or work on something. Hissing about improvement.

It's driving you mad.

Your final straw is him standing in the doorway of the gym, refusing to let you leave. He crosses his arms, eyes narrowed down at you "everyone else practiced sparring today, even price."

"Yeah, well find me someone will and I'll be glad to," you hiss, moving to shove him out of the way. "Anyone stupid enough to grapple me on the field will die anyways–"

The air is knocked out of your lungs so fast it makes your mind spin, spine knocking brutally into the floor.

"Not the ones immune to you," Ghost's face is mere inches away. Belatedly, terrifyingly, you realize he took his gloves off and his bare skin is wrapped around your throat without a twitch of pain.

"Wh– what–" you struggle, unable to fight out of the pin ghost put you in.

Ghosts other hand pulls his mask up just enough to reveal his mouth, opened to show off rows and rows of spiny teeth, all the way down his throat. "Leatherback sea turtle. Your venom does nothing to me." He leans closer "I could choke the life out of you and never feel a pinch."

Ghost leaves you lying on the floor, heart racing, gasping for air.

"We start sparring tomorrow. I won't have a liability on my team."