this is immensely funny to me

@theartofmadeline
d e v o n
noise dept.

Janaina Medeiros
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open

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Product Placement

祝日 / Permanent Vacation
Jules of Nature
tumblr dot com
Monterey Bay Aquarium

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JBB: An Artblog!
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Mike Driver
taylor price
Cosmic Funnies

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hello vonnie

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@mothmanisafriend
this is immensely funny to me
my cat is meowing thru the window at the middle aged men working on the roof rn and they're meowing back at her
she's obsessed w these guys i should have put her through trade school
I will consider this suggestion
Clash of titties
if this isnt gender equality i dont know
This “God Creating Things” series by @lonnieiiv on TikTok is HILARIOUS!
God: Now listen to me Gabriel, these are going to be really fun because some go on pizzas.
Gabriel: Yeah, okay, okay.
God: You like that? And then some will make you see things.
Gabriel: ...’Kay?
God: And some, Gabriel, some just... kill you.
Gabriel: [Long pause] You doin’ okay, pal?
I wish i had big claws to dig a little burrow in the dirt and sleep in it i think it would solve all my problems
this is a brilliant description on it's own, but @madamescarlette 's tags??????? they have slayed me??????
#faith has just dragged her hands across her face and gotten up off the bathroom floor#charity has just taken deep breaths after sending something serious but necessary#hope has had her face on the steering wheel of her parked car for the past ten minutes#and finally stands up to go in even though it's hard
boot up, Bitch
That reply is unexpectedly inspirational.
Always pleasing to see that scholars of the ancient philosopher Diogenes are still on the loose. Anti-capitalist street poster. Newtown.
the difference between tumblr and twitter is that pretty much everyone on tumblr needs some kind of compassionate intervention in their lives, but at a low background level. Twitter has 99% normies succumbing to internet brainrot and 1% just the most outlandish personalities you’ve ever seen.
your average tumblr personality is a shaking dog in a Sarah McLachlan appeal, with enough time and care they can be rehabilitated and placed in a loving home. your average big-time twitter account should be sent to a prison colony on the moon
how quickly we forget our past on this site…
Friend I was here for the bone stealing witch. Even as the sun and moon hid their eyes and averted their gaze I saw the witch walk without fear of the laws of God nor man and steal those bones and sell them on etsy. The amputated toe. The breast milk jewelry. A man who against any law of heaven desires to own another human as a pet reblogged my star wars discourse posts. You want to talk about racefaking cannibal mermaids?? Bah! How many kickstarter scams for cartoons that sounded unbearably twee have come and gone? How many stars risen and fallen? I remember when this site had a sizable userbase of meth enthusiast who just posted aesthic shots of their stash and rigs. Where are those crank aficionados now? Gone like so many others. And yet I remain!
And when I tell you that twitter is worse than any of that you should heed my words!!
#DO NOT CITE THE DEEP MAGIC TO ME WITCH#I WAS THERE WHEN IT WAS WRITTEN
Tumblr is a former battlefield that’s now turned into a haunted moor. Twitter is an active war zone.
preperations for the long journey ahead, friend
THE MUMMY (1999) + letterboxd reviewspart two ↳ part one | insp.
Nail polish 2 hours after you apply it to your nails intentionally: oh no, a gust of air has lightly accosted me! I have been torn asunder and stricken from my resting place, I must leave this place at once!
Nail polish the millisecond you spill it on something accidentally: the essence of my being has been permanently bonded to this substance since the day I was born—atom to atom, body and soul. you could no sooner remove me from this wooden table than you could remove the ocean from its water
I like how everybody is paired off haha
#this looks more like an awkward sixth grade slow dance than it does hockey
I FINALLY FOUND OUT WHY THIS HAPPENS. You see this all the time when there’s a fight or a scrum and suddenly everyone pairs up with a member of the opposite team and they just sort of …hold each other.
Someone on reddit asked about it. And it turns out there’s a logical-ish reason:
all of the other players pair off with their man to prevent anyone else entering into the fight … so it’s a form of self policing.
[…] The players basically want to prevent 2 on 1, etc. fights and by finding a “hugging” partner so there’s no ganging up on one guy, even on accident. They do it because it’s fair. And it’s kind of cute sometimes.
so now we know! it’s fair…and cute.
Aw best part is no ones left out at this dance
#hockey hugs #more or less #:)))))))) #where’s that one of Karlsson and Mike Green #that one’s priceless
=DDD
NHL: You need to prevent other player’s from joining in the fight, make sure to hold them back
Hockey players, hugging: Got it.
A Perfect Shot
It took me so long to get that it was literally a “bullseye”
some people deserve to die but the death penalty is not the answer, as soon as you give the government the ability to kill without repercussion they will find some way to weaponize that against political enemies and minorities. the solution? let me run around with a baseball bat