ok writers if your seeing this HEAR ME OUT. a fic written around the song ‘style’ by taylor swift. it’s literally such a good song. here’s me being me but i imagine it being Eddie (obv that’s my bae) but can be lit ANYONE you choose…. And the girl who’s completely nowhere near his style.. at all. Polar opposites, once they get to know each other she picks up on what he does, what he wears and what he says because she’s become so obsessed with HIS style she wants to match him. GUYS IDEK IF THIS IS GOOD I WAS JUST LISTENING TO IT UGHHH
Summary: As he comes to his decision, Eddie thinks back on the defining moments of your friendship, how you got to where you were, and just how deeply he had loved you for so very long. Now all he wanted was for you to feel the same way too.
“Wow.” You sigh, rolling off of his lap and onto the floor below you- staring up at the ceiling in a kiss-induced haze.
Wow.
“Was that okay?” Eddie asks, watching the way you closed your eyes and your lips spread into a grin.
“Yeah.” You whisper, opening your eyes as you turn your head to look at him “That was nice. Really nice, Eds. Was it okay for you too?”
Was it okay?
He’s pretty sure that you had just stolen his heart. The worst part was that he didn’t even want it back.
“Yeah.” He swallows “It was nice. I liked it…a lot.”
“Good.” You hum, smiling at him “Stay with me?”
You look over to the spot beside you, attempting to wordlessly convey to him what you wanted. You wanted him to lay beside you- to just bask in the moment with him. You wanted to remember this.
“Okay.” He says, scooting closer as he lays on his back beside you on your fluffy pink rug. The room was quiet once again as he stared at the ceiling. Just thinking about how he had kissed you- his best friend. Wondering how things could ever go back to normal after this. Wondering if he even wanted them to.
“Eddie?” You whisper.
“Yeah?” He asks, turning to look at you. You already had your eyes on him.
“Thank you for being my first kiss.”
The sound of your voice was so sickeningly sweet. You were sweet.
“Let’s just hope you don’t regret it.” He says, letting it come out as self-deprecating as possible. You hated how much Eddie ragged on himself. How he constantly sold himself short and acted as if he were an inconvenience when, to you, he was anything but.
You reach for his hand, holding it in yours as you squeezed- sending his heart thumping.
“Never.” You say “I could never regret anything about you. I love you, Eds.”
Love. The word love feels so nice in his ears even though he knew that it wasn’t quite the same way that he loved you. As a lover and not just a friend. He loved you in a way that he was too cowardly to admit. He loved you in a way that would destroy him if you didn’t feel the same. But he’d never tell you that. Not ever.
Instead, he says it back in the way that you meant it. In a way that said that he cared about you deeply. That he’d do anything for you. That he would protect you. That he would always be there. Even if it meant that he’d be stuck loving you in a one-sided way that would never quite be met by you.
He loved you in a way that he would sacrifice his own feelings and swallow them down if it meant that he still got to have you in any way that you’d let him. As a lover, friend, or anything else. As long as you were by his side.
“I love you too." He says, squeezing your hand back.
He loved you so much that it was immeasurable. The scariest part? He didn’t think he could ever stop loving you.
────────
1984
He sat at the picnic table in the wooded area near Hawkins High School as he waited for his next “client,” painstakingly flipping through yet another jewelry store catalog- desperately trying to find anything that caught his eye. Something special. Because, in less than a week, it was your sixteenth birthday. The big one. However, Eddie still had yet to find you the perfect gift.
He looked everywhere and was still empty-handed. Normally he was so good at knowing exactly what to get you but, for some reason, this year was the hardest. He didn’t want to just get you another vintage vinyl record or a band t-shirt or another scrapbook for your Polaroids. This year needed to be special. He wanted to get you something that you would love- something that you would remember forever.
He wanted your Sweet Sixteen to be perfect. He already had it all planned out. He was taking you to the drive-in to see that new Molly Ringwald movie, Sixteen Candles. When he was looking through the showings in the Hawkins Post, he immediately knew it would be perfect.
He would make up the back of the van with cozy blankets and hoards of your favorite snacks. It would be just you and him. The only thing missing was the perfect gift. It needed to be special, sentimental, and totally and completely you. He wouldn’t settle for anything less.
His head was so focused on it that he didn’t hear the snaps of twigs beneath Chrissy Cunningham’s shoes as she approached, watching Eddie intently as he stared at a page of diamond earrings. This was so much harder than he thought it would be.
Eddie practically jumps out of his skin when Chrissy plops her backpack down onto the table.
“Jesus-“ Eddie calls out before his eyes settle on Chrissy, letting out a sigh of relief that it was only her. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to get all jumpy. I didn’t hear you walk up.”
Chrissy swings her legs over the bench seat of the table, sitting down gingerly as she takes in the catalog in Eddie’s hand.
“What’s that?” She asks, nodding her head towards the magazine “Doing some shopping?”
Eddie looks down at the jewelry catalog before sighing and tossing it aside. “Trying. Mostly failing.” He admits “Don’t know why I’m even looking at a jewelry catalog. S’not like I know the first thing about jewelry that isn’t the pawn shop variety.”
“Are you…shopping for someone special?” Chrissy asks, testing the waters. Unbeknownst to Eddie, Chrissy Cunningham had a crush on him. She had ever since she began buying from him every other week. However, Chrissy didn’t know him well and she felt like she never had the chance to tell him. Not like she believed that Eddie Munson would even look at her that way. She was sure that she was the exact opposite of his type- whatever his type was.
“Yeah.” Eddie admits, absentmindedly tapping his fingers against the surface of the table “I guess you can say that. My friend’s birthday is next week. Sweet Sixteen and all that. You know, the big one. I wanna get her something special but I just….I guess I haven’t found the right thing yet.”
Chrissy watches as Eddie chews on his bottom lip anxiously.
“Do you have any ideas on what she might like?” Chrissy tries, wanting to assist Eddie with his problem.
“I know what she likes.” Eddie admits “But I wanna get her something that she won’t expect. Something special. I just….what do girls like? Like, what would you want for your birthday?”
“Hm…well,” Chrissy ponders, looking over at the discarded jewelry catalog “I definitely think jewelry is a good choice if you want to get her something special. Jewelry is totally sentimental. Something she can wear forever, you know?”
Eddie nods, listening to Chrissy’s opinion. “Yeah. You’re right. I just don’t know what type of jewelry. I feel like…a ring is too intimate. Earrings don’t seem special enough.”
“Well, have you looked at any jewelry stores? Maybe seeing things in person might give you a better idea?” She suggests.
“No, I didn’t think of that.” Eddie replies “Why didn’t I think of that?”
Chrissy watches in amusement as Eddie shakes his head. Then it dawned on him.
“Chrissy, you’re a girl…” He ponders, causing Chrissy to look at him quizzically.
“Yes, last time I checked.” She giggles.
“This might sound crazy so, like, feel free to say no…but…maybe you can help me?” Eddie suggests “Find something for her? I just…I’m not good at the whole shopping thing.”
Eddie withers a little, embarrassed to be asking a girl that he barely knew for help but he was desperate. He didn’t want to mess up your birthday by giving you something lame or something that was completely not your style or taste.
However, to Eddie’s disbelief, Chrissy was completely on board.
“Okay,” She smiles “Sure! When?”
Eddie checks his watch. “Are you free right now?”
────────
Nearly three hours later, Chrissy had dragged Eddie into practically every store in Starcourt Mall and he still hadn't found anything that jumped out to him. Nothing that stuck out and screamed that it was perfect for you.
They had ventured through stores that sold cutesy little dresses and handbags, shops that carried large arrays of perfumes, and what felt like dozens of sections that lived within every department store that Starcourt had to offer. Yet, nothing felt right- and Eddie was starting to lose hope.
"Okay," Chrissy says "What about here? We haven't tried this place yet."
Eddie straightens up from the slumped posture that he had adopted more and more as disappointment began to sink in with each store that he left empty-handed. He somehow felt like he was even more clueless than he had been when he had started. He looks up to find a small jewelry shop. Locally owned instead of the couple of big-box stores that they had perused through. He supposed it was worth a shot.
"Okay." Eddie shrugs, disappointment still etched on his face "Why not, I guess."
Chrissy grabs him by the elbow, pulling him in towards the jewelry cases that housed rows upon rows of sparkly diamonds, bright silvers, vibrant golds, and the most brilliantly gorgeous hues of colored gemstones. Eddie couldn't help but wince at how expensive the place looked.
"Hi!" A bubbly shop assistant exclaims once she notices them, quickly sliding up to greet them "Is there anything I can help you find?"
"We're kind of on a mission." Chrissy giggles, looking up at Eddie who seemed to be looking everywhere all at once. "We're looking for a birthday present for a friend. It's her Sweet Sixteen and we want to get her something really special."
"I see." The shopgirl beams "Do we have something in mind?"
"Um...that's kind of the hard part. I have no fucking idea what I'm looking for." Eddie admits, causing the shopgirl to laugh.
"Well, no worries." She replies "That's what I'm here for. Do we know what kind of jewelry the birthday girl likes?"
Eddie freezes. He had no idea what kind of jewelry you liked. He had no idea if you had a preference between silver and gold. He didn't know if you preferred gemstones to diamonds. He didn't even know your ring size. His mind was as blank as a sheet of canvas. So, to Eddie's dismay, he shakes his head.
"Does she typically wear jewelry?" The shopgirl continues.
"Sometimes." Eddie answers "Not every day. But she owns jewelry. Sometimes she wears necklaces. They're usually pretty simple."
"Okay, that's good to know!" The shopgirl beams "That actually helps a lot. Now we know that she probably isn't into big statement pieces."
"Oh, no." Eddie shakes his head "She's not flashy. She's....classic. I guess? Does that make sense?"
"That makes perfect sense." Chrissy interjects "So we should look for something simple, classic, and timeless."
Chrissy begins to wander around the cases, peering in as she scans each selection. The shopgirl ushers Eddie through the other side of the shop, discussing budget and what type of jewelry you would like best. For the first twenty minutes, they go through gemstone rings that hold your birthstone, modest diamond tennis bracelets, solitaire stud earrings, and monogram necklaces. Yet, nothing seemed right.
Until Eddie wandered towards a small section in the corner of the shop.
There is was. He knew as soon as he saw it that it was perfect. That it was the one.
The shopgirl watches a few feet away as a hopeful glimmer took over Eddie's eyes. She walks up to the display case, her sight landing on the item that he was admiring. Sitting on a cream-colored pillowy display under a bright light was a dainty golden locket necklace on a thin gold chain.
"Can I see this one?" Eddie asks, pointing at the locket.
The shopgirl smiles as she takes out her keys, unlocking the glass before delving her hand into the case and carefully scooping up the dainty piece of jewelry. As soon as she puts it into the palm of his hand, Eddie felt something. There was no mistaking the feeling- this was it.
Suddenly, he could envision you wearing it- the delicate locket hitting just below your clavicle at the end of the short chain. His thumb caresses over the elegant-yet-simple engraved design on the front of the locket- a pretty whimsical flower etched into the center as it was surrounded by other thin etched lines. It was effortlessly pretty in a way that wasn't over-the-top or gaudy. It was timelessly gorgeous, just like you.
"Ooh!" Chrissy exclaims, popping her head around Eddie's side to look at what he was holding "That's so pretty!"
"You think so?" Eddie beams, turning the necklace over in his hands.
"I think it's perfect." Chrissy smiles.
"Yeah? Me too." Eddie agrees.
"You know," The shopgirl says "You can even get it engraved on the back. Something personal and sentimental. There's even room on the inside for a picture or two.
Eddie uses his fingers to gently open the locket, revealing a spot on each side for a tiny photo. Something special that he could put inside. It was absolutely perfect in every way.
"How much?" Eddie asks, holding his breath nervously at the total. He had a tight budget and couldn't stray too far outside of it. No matter how badly he wanted to splurge on his favorite person in the world. But, when the shopgirl told him the price, his eyes widened at just how perfect it was. Just within his range of affordability.
"I'll take it." He says hastily, causing the shopgirl to smile.
"You got it." She says.
"Wait!" Chrissy squeals "You should totally get it engraved with something personal. It would be extra special."
"Yeah?" Eddie asks, turning over the idea in his head.
"Yes!" Chrissy says "She'll love it because it came from you. At least, I would love that sort of thing."
"How much would it cost to get it engraved?" Eddie asks, looking at the shopgirl.
"I don't normally do this but since it's a special occasion, I'll do it on the house."
"Really?" Eddie's eyes widen "You'd really do that? Thank you."
"Of course," She smiles "Really, I couldn't resist doing it. I also don't see too many guys come in here and put so much thought into something like this. It's really sweet. Your girlfriend's a very lucky girl."
Girlfriend.
Eddie knew that he should correct her- that he should tell her that you were just a friend and that he just wanted to get you something special for your birthday. Because you deserved it. Because he loved you. Maybe that's why he couldn't bring himself to say it. That you weren't his even though, deep down inside, he wanted you to be. He wanted you to be his so badly. Even if he knew it would never be a reality. So, he thought, what's the harm in pretending?
────────
“Eddie, are you going to tell me where we’re going?”
“Just wait a little bit longer. We’re almost there.”
You had been sitting in the passenger seat of Eddie’s van, his skull bandana tied around your eyes as a makeshift blindfold. He insisted on maintaining the surprise and not telling you where he was taking you.
“Can you at least give me a hint?” You ask.
“Nope.” Eddie answers “No hints. We’ll be there soon and then you can take off the blindfold.”
“You’re not going to drag me into the woods and dump me there, right?” You joke.
“What?” Eddie exclaims “No! You weirdo….”
“Good.” You smirk “Just checking.”
Ten minutes pass before you feel the van stop moving- Eddie putting it in park.
“Wait right there.” He says as he opens up the driver’s side door, hopping out before jogging over to your side- opening it up. He leans over and unbuckles your seatbelt, releasing you as he grabs for your hands.
“Okay, I’m going to help you out.” He says “Just swing your legs over….good. Okay, I’m going to lift you out.”
You feel Eddie’s hands wrap around your waist and he pulls you towards him, letting you steady your hands on his shoulders as he hoists you out of your seat. You were grateful when your feet met solid ground.
“Alright, sweetheart. Just a liiittle further. Hold onto my hands, okay?” He wraps his large hands around yours as he gently pulls you forward, guiding you to walk the few feet that it took you to get to the back of the van. He quickly unlocks the back doors before opening them.
“Okay.” He says “Now we just take thisss off.”
You feel Eddie’s fingers at the back of your head as he works them against the fabric of the bandana, untying the knot. As soon as the fabric is removed from your eyes, you let them flutter open. What you were met with was a surprising sight.
Your eyes land on the back of Eddie’s van, decorated with heaps of soft blankets and pillows- spread out like a comfy bed. Alongside the inside walls of the van were thin fairy lights hung up around the inside, casting a soft whimsical glow. He had hung crepe paper streamers from the inside of the back doors, creating a curtain-like effect. He has even taped up a small banner that read “Happy Sweet Sixteen!” in his unmistakable scrawl.
“Do you like it?” He asks nervously, trying to gauge your expression. You absolutely loved it.
“Eds, you did this for me?” You whisper, your voice slightly choked up.
“Of course I did.” He says, squeezing your shoulders affectionately “It’s your birthday.”
You look around at you, noticing that you were surrounded by several other cars in a large stretch of dirt road and rocky gravel. You turn to look behind you at a large silver screen. You were at the Drive-In theater.
“Wait!” You squeal excitedly, causing Eddie to smile “You brought me to the Drive-In?”
“Yeah. Is that okay?” Eddie asks “I know you wanted to watch movies for your birthday like we always do but I thought that maybe this would be better than sitting on my couch like we usually do. More special. But if you don’t want to we-“
“Are you kidding?” You ask “I love it, Eds. Thank you! This is….god, I love you.” You pull Eddie into a hug, resting your head against his chest as you squeeze him close in appreciation. “I love it. Thank you.”
Meanwhile, Eddie’s heart had never felt so full. You loved it. You were happy. God, did he love to see you happy.
“But wait.” He says, holding up a finger as you pull away “It gets better.”
He hops into the back of the van, landing in the cushiony piles of blankets as he reaches for a small cooler that was tucked away behind a mountain of pillows.
“I took the liberty of packing drinks and all of your favorite snacks.” He clutches a brown paper grocery bag and shakes it in the air.
“You didn’t!” You gasp.
“Oh, sweetheart, I absolutely did.” He beams “So, what do you want to start with first? Sweet snacks? Or bags of salty goodness with all the calories and MSG?”
“Hm…” You ponder, climbing into the back of the van to sink down into the comfy blankets next to Eddie “Surprise me.”
“Shit! Wait!” Eddie exclaims “Before I forget!”
Eddie’s hand delved into the bottom of the grocery bag, pulling out a two pack of Hostess Cupcakes. He opens up the wrapper, pulling out one of the cupcakes before reaching into his jacket pocket- pulling out one singular pink birthday candle and his signature skull Zippo lighter.
“S’not really a birthday without cake, right?” He says, inserting the candle into the middle of the snack cake before lighting it. “Alright, you ready?” He smirks.
“You’re not going to sing, are you?” You snort.
“Of course I’m going to sing.” Eddie rolls his eyes playfully “It wouldn’t be your birthday if I didn’t embarrass you with my god awful rendition of Happy Birthday.”
“Alright.” You sigh teasingly “Get it over with then.”
“As the lady wishes.” He grins, immediately hopping into a slightly off-key crooning- and you suffer through it because Eddie was your favorite person and, as bad as his singing could sometimes be, you found it endearing.
“Geez.” You snort after he hits his finishing note “Please remind me how you got to be the frontman of Corroded Coffin again?”
“Oh just shut up and make a wish, will ya?” He laughs. You close your eyes, taking a moment to think about what you wanted your birthday wish to be. Then again, you always struggled to think of something to wish for on your birthday.
As cheesy as it may sound, you already had everything that you could ever even think to wish for. Especially a best friend that loved and cared for you enough to do something so special. So, just like every year, you made the same wish- that you and Eddie would always be best friends. No matter what.
You quickly blow out the candle, extinguishing the small flame. Eddie plucks out the candle, handing over the snack to you.
“Here you are, m’lady.” He announces “I present to you, the best of the shitty junk food snack cakes.”
“Why, thank you, Sir Edward.” You joke, taking a delicious bite of your “birthday cake.” It really was the best of the crappy junk food variety and you wouldn’t have it any other way.
“Want some?” You ask, offering Eddie your birthday snack. He shrugs as you hold it to his lips, watching as he takes a bite- the delicious vanilla creme filling sitting on his lips. Before you could stop yourself, you began to think about what would happen if you were to lean in and lick it off- tasting the sweet frosting.
“Mmm.” Eddie hums appreciatively “These really are the best of the shitty snack cakes.”
“You can say that again.” You laugh. But your heart can’t help but flutter in your chest as you watch him lick the creme filling from his lips.
“Okay.” Eddie announces, clapping his hands together “Now that that’s out of the way, I have something for you. Close your eyes.”
“What-“
“Hey, I said close them.” He insists. You decide to oblige in what he had asked. “Open your hands.”
You do as your told, immediately feeling something small and rectangular being placed in your hands.
“You can open now.”
Your eyes flutter open to find a small gift box in your palms, wrapped in hot pink wrapping paper with little silver foil stars. There was a cream colored bow tied around it.
“Eddie, I said no gifts.” You say.
“Did you?” He asks, feigning innocence “Must’ve slipped my mind. Oopsies.”
“You do this every year.” You tsk, shaking your head.
“And I conveniently ‘forget’ every year.” Eddie teases “Open it.”
Instead of arguing like you always did, you begin to untie the little string bow- unraveling it from the gift. After ripping off the wrapping paper, you are left with a small rectangular black box.
“I really hope you like it.” Eddie says “It took a while for me to find something special enough but I definitely think this is it.”
You pull the lid off of the box, revealing a dainty golden locket resting inside. The sight immediately takes your breath away.
“Eddie…” You whisper, your mouth parting open in amazement as you stare at it. It was absolutely beautiful. Small and delicate yet simple with the most gorgeous etchings on the front. The dainty little flower, the elegant swirls and lines surrounding it. It was absolutely perfect. Yet, Eddie was sitting across from you- holding his breath.
“Do you like it?” He asks.
“Eddie, I love it. It’s…..it’s absolutely beautiful.” You say, eyes brimming with tears.
“You haven’t even seen the best part.” He says “Take it out of the box.”
You slowly remove the locket, holding it in your hands as you feel the smooth gold in your hands. Your interest was further piqued when you felt something etched into the back. You gingerly turn it over in your hands to find a secret engraving, a message that would rest against your chest for only you to see. There in a cursive engraved script was a message. Simple and sweet.
Love always, Eddie.
“Sweetheart, you okay?” Eddie asks, reaching for your hand “You’re crying. You….you hate it, don’t you?”
“No!” You shake your head, your voice full of tears and emotion “Eddie, I love it. I love it so much. I…it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”
You are the most beautiful thing that I’ve ever seen….
“Yeah?” He asks “You really like it?”
“Eddie, I wish there were words to explain how much I love it. Thank you. So much.”
“Wait. Open it.” He says.
Just when you thought it couldn’t get any better, you gently open up the locket, revealing two tiny pictures of you and Eddie on the inside. Your heart immediately felt like it was about to burst. On one side was a tiny locket-sized version of a photo of you and him sitting on the floor of the trailer with his guitar during your first Christmas together in 1979.
You were seated on his lap as you held his guitar in yours, his hands gently placed over yours as he showed you how to play it. It was a picture that Wayne had taken with your Polaroid from that year. It was Eddie’s favorite photo of you together.
On the other side of the locket was a semi-recent photo from just the summer before. It was a photo of the two of you at the lake during a beach trip. It was one that Jonathan had taken. The two of you sitting side-by-side on the sandy shore of the lake as you smiled at the camera, hugging your knees close to your chest. Eddie was sitting beside you, not paying attention to the camera- his eyes completely on you, a grin on his face. It was one of your favorites.
As soon as you saw it, you were practically sobbing.
“Shit, sweetheart, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to make you cry.” Eddie panics.
“No, it’s okay.” You assure him, wiping your nose with the back of your hand “I’m happy. Really fucking happy, Eds.”
“Yeah?” He asks, a sigh of relief escaping his chest “Good. Because that’s all I want, sweetheart. For you to be happy.”
You lean in, wrapping your arms around Eddie’s neck as you pull him in for a hug- burying your face in his messy curls.
“Thank you, Eddie.” You murmur “For everything. I don’t know what I’d ever do without you. You’re so good to me.”
“Of course.” Eddie whispers back “You deserve it, sweetheart. You deserve everything.”
And he meant it. With his whole entire heart, he had meant every word. You deserved the world, the moon, and the stars above- and Eddie cared about you so deeply that he’d risk his life to try and get them for you. All to make you smile.
“Happy Sweet Sixteen…”
────────
1986
“Principal Higgins, I know that what Eddie did was wrong but I really don’t think expelling him is fair.” You explain, wringing your hands together nervously “I think you and I both know how hard Eddie worked to get on track to graduate this year.”
You had been babbling on and on as best as you could to keep Eddie from getting in trouble. You had been in the principal’s office for at least a half an hour trying to reason with him. All you could hope was that you were finally getting somewhere.
“Look, young lady, I know that Eddie is your friend but if I let him off easy, things like this will keep happening. If I let him get away with what he’s done, that will set a poor example for the other members of the student body. It sends a message that violence and physical assault is okay. That’s not the Hawkins way. You understand where I’m coming from, don’t you?”
You felt like you were losing. You had to try harder. As angry as you were with Eddie, you couldn’t let him get kicked out of school. No matter how unacceptable his actions were.
“I know, sir. Really, I understand completely. However, I think a couple days of after school detention and cancelling Hellfire Club for the rest of the year is an ample amount of punishment for Eddie to learn his lesson. Graduation is only a couple weeks away and he’ll be completely out of your hair after that. Please, sir. Please at least consider it.”
“Like I said, young lady, I completely understand and I admire your determination in trying to help your friend but chasing other students off of school grounds and threatening bodily harm is not acceptable at Hawkins High School. It’s my responsibility to keep my students safe. I’m sorry but this is just how things have to be.”
“Okay.” You sigh. Maybe this was finally a situation you were faced with where you couldn’t talk Eddie out of trouble. Maybe there was nothing that you could do after all.
You felt absolutely defeated.
You bend over in the chair across from his desk, burying your head in your hands. Maybe you really should let it go. Maybe, for once, you should leave Eddie’s mess for himself to clean up. Then you hear Principal Higgins sigh.
“Okay, look…I think that we could potentially make a compromise. But this needs to stay between us.”
Your head shoots up to look at Principal Higgins whose eyes had softened at how helpless you looked. Maybe he could do just one little favor for you.
“Eddie Munson has to sit through two sessions of after-school detention and forfeit his position as president of Hellfire Club for the rest of the year. If he can agree to those terms and give me confirmation that he will absolutely not violate any more school rules or get into any more trouble, he can continue to attend the rest of the school year.”
“Oh my god, thank you, sir.” You reply, letting out a sigh of relief “I…He’ll be on his best behavior, I promise.”
“Also,” Principal Higgins replies “He will be banned from walking the stage at graduation. The last thing I need is to risk him acting foolishly at the most important event of the school year.”
While having Eddie’s right to walk completely revoked was a little harsh, you knew that you’d have to lose some in order to win some. He’d just have to learn to deal with it.
“Thank you, sir!” You say “I promise you won’t regret it. I really, truly appreciate you giving him another chance. I’ll make sure that this never happens again.”
“Well, I sure do hope so, young lady.” Principal Higgins replies “Otherwise, I won’t be anywhere near as lenient next time. Don’t let there be a next time.”
“Thank you, sir!” You beam “I promise you won’t regret it.”
You stand from your chair before exiting his office. You weave through the hall leading you back into the front office where you find Eddie perched anxiously on the edge of a chair, his elbows rested on his knees. His body instinctively rises as soon as he lays eyes on you. You, on the other hand, wanted nothing to do with him.
As you cut him a look and start making your way out of the office, Eddie lunges for your wrist- attempting to still you so that he could do something. Apologize? Explain? Grovel at your feet for absolute forgiveness? He didn’t know. Eddie just knew that he really fucked things up this time.
“Sweetheart…” He says, brown eyes pleading as you yank your arm out of his grasp “Look, I’m sorry. I-“
“Just fucking save it, Eddie.” You shake your head disgustedly “I really don’t wanna talk to you.”
“But-“
“I don’t want to hear it. I’m tired of everything always being about you, Eddie.” You spit “Just leave me alone.”
He stood behind in the office, watching as you pushed your way through the doors as you hurried down the hallways. Maybe you just needed space, Eddie thought. If thats what you needed then that’s what he would give you.
Well….as long as it didn’t take too long for you to come back around.
────────
That night, you sat on the edge of your bed, staring at your pink prom dress that hung proudly on your closet door- a dress that you’d never get to wear. Because of your so-called best friend, you no longer had a date or a boyfriend. Might as well kiss Senior Prom goodbye too.
You lay back on your bed, staring up at the ceiling as you think about the mess that Eddie had gotten you into. You were sure that if you even tried to call your boyfriend, well now ex-boyfriend, he wouldn’t even want to talk to you. Truth be told, you knew this was coming. He and Eddie both hated each other. It was only a matter of time before the tension finally came to a head.
The sound of something hitting your window causes you to startle. You sit up, waiting for it to happen again so that you were sure that you hadn’t imagined it and that it was all in your mind. A few seconds later, it happened again- a small stone bouncing off your second story bedroom window. Your heart immediately begins to lift. Maybe it was your boyfriend finally coming to make up with you.
You jump off of your bed, hurrying to your vanity mirror to check and make sure you looked presentable. You race to your window, throwing back your curtains and sliding it open before peeking out. But the person you found on your front lawn wasn’t your boyfriend.
It was Eddie.
Your heart immediately drops to your stomach. Great.
“Wait!” He calls out, watching as you reach up to close your window again “Sweetheart, I know you’re mad. Just come down and talk to me, okay?”
“Screw you, Eddie!” You shout.
“Baby, please talk to me! I know you’re upset-“
“Upset?” You shout “You think I’m upset? Eddie, I’m fucking furious! You…you….God, I’m so fucking mad at you!”
“I know, angel.” Eddie sighs as he looks up at you “And you have every right to be. I really fucked up this time. But please don’t be mad at me.”
Unfortunately for Eddie, his pleading wasn’t going to get him anywhere with you. This had been the straw that finally broke the camel’s back.
“I’m done, Eddie!” You call out “Completely done.”
“Sweetheart, you don’t mean that.” Eddie says “You’re just mad. C’mon, let’s just talk it out like we always do.”
“You really think that talking is going to fix this?” You scoff “Well, it’s not. You can’t fix this.”
“You don’t mean that.” Eddie says, very unsure of himself because he’s never seen you this angry with him in….well, ever.
“Yeah, Eddie.” You say “I do mean it. Now get out of my yard. I don’t want to see you anymore.”
“Sweetheart-“
“Seriously, Eddie! Get off my lawn or I’m calling Wayne!”
“Look, I know you’re mad but-“
And before Eddie could react, you ball up your fist and whip something out of the window at him- launching it right at his face. It hits him right smack in the forehead, causing him to wince in pain.
“Ow! Jesus fucking Christ!” He yells “What the fuck was that?!”
But instead of answering, you slam your window down- angrily yanking the curtains closed as you leave him out there on your lawn.
Eddie rubs the spot on his forehead that was impacted by your angry throw, looking around for whatever it was that you had chucked at him. It didn’t take him long to see it.
Right next to his boot, in the grass lying face-down, was your locket.
Fuck, Eddie thought as he bent down to scoop it into his hand. I really did fuck up this time.
────────
For days, you had ignored Eddie. You declined his rides to and from school, you refused to sit with him during lunch, you wouldn’t answer his calls. Nothing. You weren’t even speaking to him. Hell, you wouldn’t even look in his direction. Eddie was starting to worry that he might have actually lost you for real this time.
You saunter down the hallway to your locker, stopping in front of it to put in your combination. As you open it up, you are met with another folded up note in Eddie’s handwriting.
I’m Sorry :(
Was scribbled on the front of it. This was the fifth one that you had received this week. You shake your head, clutching it in your hand as you grab out your algebra textbook, slamming your locker shut as you begin to walk to class. From across the hall, Eddie watches you. His eyes following you as you stop at the end of the hallway near the water fountains, tossing the note into the garbage cans that were housed next to it.
His heart sank in his chest.
You didn’t even read it.
────────
He had finally cornered you in the hallway that the end of that week. As you were walking past the drama room, Eddie shoots his hand out to drag you inside- quickly closing the door and locking it.
“Hey, what the fuck?!” You grumble angrily as Eddie leans up against the door with his body so that you couldn’t escape.
“Eddie, what-“
“Look, I’ve had enough of this.” He cuts you off “You’ve been so fucking mean and angry with me all week. Let’s just fucking talk this out, okay? So that we can both stop being miserable.”
“Miserable?” You scoff “You’re miserable? Eddie, you completely flew off the handle and tried to beat up my boyfriend! Now he won’t fucking talk to me because he thinks that my best friend is a goddamn psycho! Do you know how humiliating that is?”
“I know,” Eddie nods “I’m-“
“Nuh-uh.” You hold up your finger “I’m not finished.”
Eddie immediately felt like he had swallowed a rock.
“I’m so sick of this shit, Eddie. The crazy part is that you probably don’t even realize how much you affect my love life by acting the way that you do! No guy wants to date me when my best friend is an absolute dick to them. Now, because of you, I lost a guy I really cared about and now I get to miss out on Senior Prom because I don’t have a date. I’m going to have to spend the rest of my life looking back and remembering that I didn’t get to go because of you.”
Eddie didn’t expect the reaction that your last few words had on him. Hearing you say them felt like he had been punched hard in the stomach. You were missing out on an opportunity because of him.
“Sweetheart, I’m….fuck. I’m so sorry. I wasn’t thinking. I-“
“That’s the problem, Eddie.” You shake your head “You don’t think. You just do things and disregard how your actions could make other people feel. You’re so selfish, Eddie. You always have been.”
“That’s not-“
“Eddie, you can’t just apologize and hope that it fixes things. You hurt me really badly this time and….it’s not okay.”
“You’re right, baby.” He says, stepping forward to cup your face into his hands “It’s not okay. I….fuck. How do I fix it? Sweetheart, just tell me what to do to fix it and I’ll do it. I can’t stand seeing you like this. It kills me. I just…I just want things to go back to how they were.”
“They can’t, Eddie. The damage is already done.” You answer “….I don’t know if things can go back to the way that they were. I just….I don’t know if you and I can even be friends after this.”
Eddie felt like the wind was knocked out of him.
“Sweetheart, I know you’re mad,” Eddie starts, his voice shaky “But don’t say shit like that. I’ll fix things and we’ll make up like we always do because…fuck, that’s what we do. It’s kind of our thing. We fix our shit and we fucking stick together because it’s us, you know. That’s always been us.”
“No, Eddie.” You sigh “It used to be. Not anymore.”
You gently wrap your hands around Eddie’s wrists, removing them from your face as he lets them drop to his sides in defeat. You take a step back, putting distance between the two of you. Distance that probably should have always been there but you were too selfish to maintain. But now you were finally coming to terms with the facts. Maybe you and Eddie aren’t good for each other, after all.
“I’ve gotta go, Eddie.” You say, trying to hold yourself together as you try not to look at the boy in front of you that was falling apart.
“Sweetheart-“ He hiccups, his eyes welling with tears. The sight of it hit you hard. You can count on one hand how many times over the past seven years that you had seen Eddie cry. This one had to be the most hurtful to watch.
“I’ll…see you around, Eddie.” You whisper, trying to control the urge to reach for him and make everything better. You knew you couldn’t. Because, if you did, you would just find yourself stuck in this same fucked up cycle. Maybe it was finally time for the pattern to be broken.
You look down at your shoes, walking around Eddie to get to the door of the drama room- letting yourself unlock it before turning the handle. You spare yourself one last glance at your best friend as he stares at the wall in front of him- only giving you the back of his head and the large Dio graphic on the back of his vest. In that moment, you were glad that you couldn’t see his face. You knew the look that would be upon it would completely destroy you.
────────
Eddie’s eyes were red and puffy when he finally got to the clearing in the woods where he was supposed to meet Chrissy Cunningham ten minutes ago. He toted his metal lunchbox at his side as he approached the picnic table. As he sets it down, Chrissy looks up at him- taking in his tear-streaked face, red eyes, and sullen expression.
“Hey.” He said glumly, swinging his legs over the picnic table to sink down onto the wooden bench “Sorry I’m late.”
I’ve just been crying in the boys restroom like a pathetic asshole until I lost track of time.
“Are you okay?” Chrissy asks, worried by Eddie’s messy appearance- well, messier than usual “Have you been crying?”
Eddie immediately felt embarrassed, wanting to shrink into himself and disappear.
“I…uh….no.” He lies “Just….allergies. They really kick my ass this time of year.”
God, he was fucking pathetic.
“So….” Chrissy starts, not knowing how to keep the conversation going but she knew that she desperately wanted to. He would never know it but talking to him during their “deals” was the highlight of Chrissy’s week.
“How have things been?”
Eddie looks up at her as he digs through his lunchbox for the dime bag that he had prepared for her. He has no idea how to answer that.
“It’s…I’ve been…it’s been terrible.” He sighs in defeat.
“Oh?” Chrissy asks, caught off-guard by his honesty “I’m sorry! Do you wanna talk about it?”
Eddie just shakes his head. “No. Not really. The last thing I wanna do is get you involved in my shitty life issues.”
“No, it’s okay!” Chrissy says “I don’t mind. If you do want to talk about it.”
Eddie then realizes the weight of all of this and everything that’s happened to you. He was exhausted with it. So tired that he didn’t even want to talk about it. He didn’t have the energy. He just wanted to shut his mind off.
“Nah.” He replies “I don’t really wanna talk about me. How are…things with you? How are things going with the queen of Hawkins High?”
“The queen, huh?” She giggles, fiddling with her necklace. It unexpectedly causes Eddie to smile. Just a little bit.
“Well, yeah.” Eddie shrugs, beginning to perk up “Captain of the cheer squad. Most popular girl in school. What’s up in the kingdom, you know?”
“Bold of you to assume that I’m so popular.” Chrissy replies.
“No?” Eddie asks “Every time I see you in the halls, you’re surrounded by people. I’d consider that popular.”
“I think you and I have very different ideas of what being popular is like.” Chrissy says “If I was so popular, I would probably have a date to prom.”
Eddie couldn’t miss the unmistakable way that Chrissy shoulders had dropped in disappointment.
“You don’t have a date to prom?” Eddie questions, arching his eyebrows in surprise “Really? You?”
“What do you mean me?” Chrissy asks curiously.
“I…I don’t know.” Eddie responds “I guess I just assumed that a girl like you would have been the first to be asked to prom.”
This immediately piques Chrissy’s attention.
“Really?” She asks “What do you mean by that?”
Suddenly, Eddie realizes what had just come out of his mouth and begins to backtrack.
“I just…you know,” He stammers “You’re cute and you’re popular. I just assumed that you’d…I don’t know…that you would have a date.”
“Oh.” Chrissy replies “What about you? Are you going to prom?”
“Me?” Eddie laughs, shaking his head “No. Prom is really not my thing.”
“Why not?” Chrissy asks.
“I’m just not into it.” He explains “Standing around watching a bunch of ball dribblers grope on their cheerleader girlfriends and dance to mind numbingly shitty pop tracks just isn’t my scene, you know.”
“Oh.” Chrissy whispers, her face turning into a frown.
“No offense or anything.” Eddie hastily corrects himself “That has, like, nothing to do with you. I think you’re cool, Chrissy.”
“Really?” She asks, beginning to perk up.
“Yeah.” Eddie replies “Totally. Super cool.”
“Yeah, well, apparently not cool enough for someone to ask me.” She pouts.
“Well, why do you have to wait for some guy to ask you? Why can’t you just ask someone?” Eddie states, as if it were obvious.
“Well, I…there is this guy.” Chrissy starts “He’s a little rough around the edges but he’s really…sweet. I really want to ask him but I…I’m scared that he’s going to say no.”
“Really?” Eddie asks, resting his chin in his hand “Why do you think he’d say no?”
“I just….I don’t know. I just don’t think that I’m his type.”
“Really?” Eddie shakes his head “I think any guy that wouldn’t like you is an idiot.”
“Really?” Chrissy whispers, her eyes glimmering with hope.
“Yeah.” Eddie shrugs “I think he’d be stupid not to go out with a girl like you and, if he says no, he’s probably some asshole that isn’t worth your time anyway.”
“Wow, Eddie.” Chrissy says, looking up at him with her baby blue eyes. Eyes that Chrissy hopes that Eddie thinks are pretty. “Thank you. That’s really sweet of you to say.”
“Don’t mention it, sweetheart.” He smiles, causing Chrissy’s heart to skip a beat. Eddie really was sweet. And cute. And not like anyone else.
Unbeknownst to Eddie, he had just kickstarted Chrissy Cunningham’s crush into overdrive- and he was the very subject of it.
────────
“She really hasn’t said anything about me?” Eddie asks, agonizing as Nancy Wheeler continued to rearrange her mock-up of the school newspaper. He had been in the journalism room for the last twenty minutes trying to pry any sort of info out of her about you.
“Eddie, don’t you have someone else to complain to? I’m kind of busy right now.”
“Wheeler, you don’t get it.” Eddie tries to explain “This is dire for me. I haven’t spoken to her in days. She really hasn’t said anything about me to you?”
“Eddie-“
“I miss her.” Eddie admits “We’ve never gone this long without talking. I just…I really fucked it up with her and I just want her back. I don’t know what to do, Wheeler. I’m literally clueless here. I need to fix it. I just…I don’t know how.”
Nancy Wheeler didn’t know why but watching Eddie become so vulnerable had somehow softened her heart- just a little bit.
“Alright.” Nancy sighs, looking up at Eddie with a serious look on her face “She misses you too.”
“Really?” Eddie perks up like a dog who could sense that its owner was home. “She does? She said that?”
“Yes.” Nancy sighs “It’s all she talks about. How much she misses you even though she’s still mad at you.”
“What?” Eddie exclaims “Why did you lie then?”
“Because it’s girl-code, Munson.” Nancy rolls her eyes “I’m not supposed to tell you that she’s miserable and sad over you. I’m supposed to lie and say that she’s doing great in order to get you to believe that she’s doesn’t need you.”
“She needs me?” Eddie beams, causing Nancy to roll her eyes.
“I wouldn’t go that far.”
“Wheeler, you’ve gotta help me.” Eddie pleads “You’ve gotta help me fix this. I need her to be friends with me again. What do I need to do?”
“Have you tried apologizing?” Nancy interrogates, raising an eyebrow.
“Yeah.” Eddie admits “I tried to apologize a shit load of times and she still isn’t talking to me. I just don’t know how to get her to finally come around and see how sorry I am.”
Suddenly, Nancy’s hands halt completely- dropping her mock-up onto the desk in front of her.
“I’ve got an idea.” She says, looking at Eddie “But you aren’t going to like it.”
Eddie watches in horror as Nancy’s lips curl into a mischievous grin.
“Oh no…”
────────
“Ow! Jesus!” Eddie exclaims as Robin rips the hairbrush through his hair for the umpteenth time.
“Well, if you would stop moving….” She tsks “I’m almost done.” She pulls Eddie’s hair back, tying it up in a bun at the nape of his neck.
“Voila!” She announces, allowing Eddie to turn and look at himself in the mirror. He didn’t want to admit it to Robin but he looked…good. He was freshly shaken, his hair was brushed and styled neatly, and he was actually wearing cologne. He even dared to think that he looked sort of sophisticated- mature.
“Alright. Tux time.” Robin announced, walking over to bring down the garment bag containing the tuxedo that she had borrowed from Steve. Eddie holds his breath, worried that Robin had found him something cheesy and ridiculous but was pleasantly surprised when he realized that it was a classic plain black suit jacket and a nice white button-down shirt.
“I didn’t think that you’d go for the suit pants that went with this.” Robin explains as she pulls out the jacket and lays it out on Eddie’s bed “So, black jeans will have to do. Plus, I’m sure they’ll suit you better.”
“Fine by me, Buckley.” Eddie shrugs.
Eddie follows Robins directions, putting on his nicest pair of black jeans and slipping on the white tux shirt as he begins to button it up. As Robins helps him with the bow-tie, he can’t help but think about you only a few blocks away- Nancy Wheeler was probably helping you get ready. As long as everything was going to plan.
After Robin finishes with the bow-tie and helps him slip on his tux jacket, Eddie turns around to look in the mirror fully at the finished look. He didn’t look half bad. He actually looked handsome. Suave, even.
Robin lets out a low whistle in approval, walking up beside him as he looks at his reflection.
“You know, Munson, if I wasn’t into women, I’d definitely look twice at you.” She admits, turning to pin the boutonnière to the lapel of the tux jacket.
“Thanks?” Eddie asks, a little puzzled by the compliment.
“Alright, tiger.” Robin says, smoothing out his jacket “Let’s go get her.”
Just when Eddie was about to say something sarcastic, he hears a knock at the door. A few moments later, Wayne pokes his head into his bedroom.
“Ed, there’s a girl here for you.” He announces, a confused look on his face “Said she’s here to see you and that it’s important.”
Nancy.
Eddie’s immediate thought was that something in the plan had failed. He walks out of his bedroom, hurrying to the door as he finds Chrissy Cunningham standing on the front porch- dressed in a pretty blue formal dress that brought out the color of her eyes. Her hair was done up and she was wearing makeup.
Eddie is met with confusion. What the hell was Chrissy doing here?
“Hi.” She says bashfully.
“Hey.” He greets her, standing awkwardly.
“I…sorry for just dropping by here like this. I honestly don’t know why I came. I guess I just got this idea in my head and I knew that, if I didn’t act on it, I would regret it. Eddie, the other day you said that any guy would be lucky to go to prom with me. Do you really feel that way?” Chrissy looks up at him with her blue eyes, leaving Eddie feeling as though he were under some sort of spell.
“Y-yeah.” He stammers before clearing his throat “Of course I believe that. It was all true. Everything I said.”
“You also said that I shouldn’t have to rely on a guy to ask me to prom. That I should just ask someone myself. Ever since you said that, I’ve been thinking about it and…Eddie, I really like you. A lot. I think you’re so cool and smart and funny and I feel silly doing this but I know I would regret it if I don’t ask but….would you come to prom with me?”
Eddie froze. Chrissy Cunningham just asked him…to prom. This was officially the strangest thing that has ever happened to him.
Chrissy Cunningham with her pretty, angelic face and her soft voice and her cute demeanor. Her hair done up and dressed so pretty to ask him to be her date tonight. It was far too much. Eddie was immediately flooded with guilt.
“Wow…” Eddie mutters, trying desperately to find the right words- how to let down a girl that had worked up the courage to come and bare her soul to him. “Chrissy, I’m flattered, really. Like, this is really unexpected. I mean….wow. Um…”
“Is everything okay?” She asks, looking at him with those innocent baby blues.
God, she was going to think that he was a complete dick.
“Yeah. Yeah, no, everything’s fine. It’s just….I’m sorry Chrissy but I…I’m actually about to go and ask someone else to the prom. I didn’t expect you to ask me. God, I feel fucking horrible.” He agonizes, rubbing his hands down his face. “I-“
“Hey, it’s okay!” Chrissy says, her voice a little too high-pitched and saccharine sweet. “I did kind of just…show up here and sprung this on you. I didn’t think about the fact that maybe there was someone that you wanted to ask. I guess I just assumed that because you said that you didn’t like prom. But I just thought that maybe you were just saying that and didn’t actually mean it.”
Which made everything worse because he had told Chrissy that he didn’t like the idea of prom and that he wasn’t going to go. Now, here he was, all dressed up for prom. About to ask someone else.
“You look nice, by the way.” Chrissy says with a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. She was disappointed. Eddie’s heart ached. “You look really handsome.”
“Thanks, Chrissy.” Eddie says “You look…you look beautiful.”
“Thank you.” Chrissy says. As soon as she finished talking, an awkward and uncomfortable silence falls over the both of them.
“I….should get going.” Chrissy finally says “I have to go meet up with my friends but….good luck, Eddie. I hope you have a good time tonight.”
Before Eddie could think of what to say to hopefully make things better, Chrissy descends the steps of his front stoop and makes her way back to a little silver town car that he was guessing that she must have rented.
As the little car backed out of the driveway and started off down the road, Eddie couldn’t help but feel his stomach twist in immense guilt.
Poor Chrissy…
────────
“Nance, are you going to tell me what’s going on?” You ask, standing in the middle of your living room in your prom dress.
Ever since she arrived two hours ago with a duffle bag full of makeup and hair styling tools, she had refused to answer any of your questions.
“I already told you.” She says “You are going to prom.”
“Nancy,” You sigh, preparing to explain again for the thousandth time “I can’t go to prom. I don’t have a date.”
“Actually,” Nancy corrects “You do have a date and he should be here any minute now.”
“What?” You ask incredulously “No, I don’t. Who-“
Your protest was interrupted by the door bell ringing, causing Nancy to smile excitedly.
“Right on time.” She says, bounding towards the door as you stand in the middle of the living room even more confused. You follow behind her, watching anxiously as Nancy grabs the door- swinging it open to reveal Eddie. Your jaw practically drops to the floor.
“Munson.” Nancy greets, letting him stroll into your foyer- followed by Robin Buckley who had a camera draped around her neck. There was so much going on and you were struggling to keep up. Before you could react and try to make sense of everything, Eddie approaches you- a plastic container in his hand that held a pretty corsage of white roses and one singular bright yellow marigold at the center. When he stops in front of you, your breath hitches.
He was dressed up in a nice tux shirt and suit jacket. His bow-tie perfectly tied and a rose boutonnière pinned to his tuxedo jacket. He sported black jeans and a nice pair of black boots. His wallet chain hanging against his right hip. He looked good. Formal and handsome yet still…Eddie.
His hair was neatly styled in a low bun with the shorter pieces of his wild curls framing his face. He looked so neat and put together- and he smelled good. Real good. The sight of him left your mouth dry and you were so distracted by how he looked that you didn’t realize that you were having the same affect on Eddie.
From his eyes, you looked the most beautiful that you had ever looked. Even prettier than that yellow dress you hated. You looked gorgeous, more mature- womanly. Eddie couldn’t take his eyes off of you.
Your dress was light pink satin and hugged your waist perfectly. It had a ruffled off-the-shoulder neckline. It was floor length and elegant, making you look like a princess. Your hair was swept up in an updo of soft curls that Nancy had painstakingly used three different curling irons to achieve. Your makeup was minimal yet gorgeous, accentuating your natural beauty. You were a vision.
“You look…..wow.” Eddie breaths. At least, he was trying to. The sight of you had taken his breath away.
“Thank you.” You say, looking down bashfully at the hem of your prom dress “You look nice too.”
Eddie’s heart flutters at the compliment.
“Alright, children!” Robin sing-songs, pulling your attention away from each other “Time for photos!”
“Ugh…” Eddie groans exaggeratively “Buckley, no. Please no.”
“C’mon!” She replies “Just a couple. Your future grandchildren are gonna want to see them.”
“Robin!” You exclaim, giving her a horrified look. Eddie just blushes, Robin’s comment about sharing grandchildren replaying in his mind.
“Oh, calm down.” She says “I never said that you two are going to have the same grandchildren.”
You suddenly felt foolish. Robin didn’t actually say that. You just assumed. Your face began to heat up in embarrassment.
“Now, come on, you crazy kids. We don’t have all night. Go stand by the fireplace.” She orders, waving her hand around to usher you both over. You look over at Eddie, immediately met with his gaze when you realize that he had already been looking at you. You didn’t notice but Eddie’s gaze hadn’t shifted from you since he arrived.
“This is crazy.” You murmur, causing Eddie to crack the first smile that he had in days.
“You can say that again.”
“Hey!” Robin bellows “Less talking, more moving.”
“I suppose we should appease mom before she grounds us.” You joke, causing Eddie to let out a short laugh.
“Or lock us in a broom closet.”
────────
The ride to prom in Eddie’s van was awkward, neither of you speaking as he drove- the radio playing softly at a low volume. You weren’t used to the uncomfortable silence. Especially from Eddie who never seemed to stop talking.
You were still reeling at the sight of Eddie dressed up in formal wear. For years you were thoroughly convinced that you’d never see him dressed in anything fancier than non-distressed jeans unless someone died. But he was sitting across from you looking so…gorgeous- to take you to prom of all places. Despite his very vehement negative stance on prom and how it was all a part of the forced conformity that he was so against.
He drums his fingers against the steering wheel as you nervously fidget with the corsage he had slipped onto your wrist before leaving your house. You were using it as a distraction so that you wouldn’t resort to staring at him and how good he looked.
And damn did he look good…
Eddie, on the other hand, was sweating bullets. The silence unnerved him. In the past, it was always the silence between the two of you during a fight that bothered Eddie the most and this was no exception. He would much rather prefer that you yell at him than give him the cold shoulder. He missed your voice. All he wanted was to talk to you. To finally get over this fight like all the others and just be friends again. He couldn’t wait any longer. Too much time had already been wasted.
“I-“
“Hey-“
You both spoke up at the same time, causing you to lock eyes.
“Sorry.” You mutter, looking down at your lap “You go first.”
“…I just wanted to say…I’m sorry.” Eddie sighs “About everything. What I did was shitty and I shouldn’t have done that. You were right about what you said. I don’t fucking think sometimes and I just do shit and that’s not fair to you because you get stuck dealing with it. I’m sorry. I wish I could take it back. If I could, you would be going to prom with your ex like you wanted and not stuck here with me.”
“Eddie,” You sigh, shaking your head “Going to prom with you isn’t the problem. The problem is….why did you even do it in the first place? What did he do that even got you so upset?”
Eddie’s hands grip the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles turned white, thinking back to that day over a week ago that caused him to try and kick your ex’s ass.
“I…I don’t think I should talk about it.” Eddie murmurs, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. “I don’t…you’ll just get upset.”
“Why would I get upset?” You ask, looking at Eddie in confusion. What you don’t know was that there was way more to the story with your ex than you actually knew.
“It’s nothing. It doesn’t matter.” Eddie replies.
“Yes, it does matter.” You say “Eddie, what happened?”
“Sweetheart…” Eddie groans.
“Eddie, tell me what happened. What the fuck happened?”
And finally he exploded, spewing out everything that he had been holding in for days.
“He was talking shit about you, okay?” Eddie admits, forcing his eyes to stay solely on the road in order to prevent himself from seeing your reaction. He knew it would destroy him.
“What?” You ask, blinking as you sat in your seat- trying to make sure you hadn’t misheard him. Unfortunately, you hadn’t.
“He was talking shit about you, sweetheart.” Eddie repeats “That’s why I got so fucking upset, okay? He said some shit about you that I didn’t like. Did I maybe overreact? Yeah. But he was…I just couldn’t fucking stand to listen to him talk about you like that. When that fucking asshole was lucky that you even gave him the time of day? It was fucking bullshit.”
“Eddie, what did he say?” You mutter, your eyes brimming with tears.
“Shit, baby, please…sweetheart, please don’t do this. Don’t make me fucking say it.” He pleads, his voice coming out weak and helpless “I can’t repeat what he said to me. I would just get upset all over again and I’ll want to say fuck the prom and go drive to his house and actually finish what I started….and I just can’t do that to you, okay?”
“Eddie,” You start, looking over at him with a serious look upon your face. One that Eddie knew all too well. He knew you weren’t just going to let this go “Tell me what he said.”
“Fuck…you really want to know?” He asks.
“Yes, Eddie. I really want to know. Even if it’s going to hurt me.” You state.
“Jesus Christ,” He groans “Okay…fuck. That day we were waiting for you at your locker. I was just standing there waiting for you like I always fucking do so that I can drive you home and this fucking asshole…god, this asshole…starts to tell me about your college admissions essay. The one you sent to Indiana State.”
“….Okay….” You reply, prompting him to go on.
“Well, he just…he just starts fucking ragging on it. Like, horribly, sweetheart. About how terrible he thought it was and how even though he ‘loved you’ no one in the admissions office would ever in their right mind think that it was any good and send you an acceptance letter. He just…he was such a fucking dick and he just kept going. Like you weren’t my fucking best friend. Like I was just going to jump in and agree with him. Like Wayne and I hadn’t read that fucking essay and thought it was one of the best things we’ve ever fucking read in our lives. Like I didn’t fucking tear up at the fucking kitchen table after he left for work because I fucking knew that you were going to get in. That the fucking essay you wrote was a fucking one-way ticket out of here and away from me. To hear him fucking talk about you like that, baby? That fucking killed me! I didn’t know what fucking happened but it felt like something fucking snapped in me and I just lost it and I threw him into the lockers and I just….I wanted to kill him. For fucking talking about you like that. Like you were nothing. When you’re the best thing that ever happened to me and Wayne and even that fucking piece of shit asshole that didn’t fucking deserve you. There. That’s what happened.”
You were left there. Stunned. It all fucking made sense.
“Eddie…”
“It also, you know, didn’t exactly help that I already hated him. I always thought he was a pretentious little fuck from the moment you brought him around but I fucking put up with him because he made you happy and, sweetheart, I just wanted you to be happy. Even if I fucking hated that prick and his stupid fucking sweaters. Like, seriously, who the fuck wears argyle print sweaters? But I just…I didn’t wanna ruin any chance of you being happy. But listening to him talk about you like that? I couldn’t fucking do it. That’s where I fucking draw the line, sweetheart. I-“
You immediately reach for Eddie’s hand, pulling it into your lap as you intertwined your fingers with his. Eddie’s pulse quickened. This was the closest he’s been to you in so long and, fuck, did he miss it.
“Does this…mean that you’re not mad at me anymore?” He asks cautiously, trying not to melt as you rubbed the pad of your thumb against the back of his hand.
“No, Eds.” You say “I’m not mad at you anymore. I…I never wanted to be mad at you. I can’t stay mad at you.”
“Good.” He sighs in relief “Because I can’t stand it when you’re mad at me. You know that.”
“Yeah.” You sigh back “I do.”
“So…friends again?” Eddie asks, looking over at you with hopeful eyes. You can’t help the feeling of butterflies in your stomach underneath his lopsided grin- the cute little dimple in the right side of his cheek.
“Yeah.” You smile back “Friends again.”
“Cool.” Eddie beams, removing his hand from yours momentarily to dive into his tux pocket. You watch in confusion when Eddie pulls it back out, opening his hand out to you as your locket sits in the middle of his palm- the golden hour sun glinting off of the smooth metal.
“I’ve been carrying this around.” He admits “I figured you might want it back. You know, on the condition that you don’t throw it at me again.”
You smirk. “I won’t. I promise.”
“Good.” Eddie smiles “It looks better on you anyway.”
────────
That whole night, Eddie couldn’t help but stare. Pretty much every single girl in the senior class was all dolled up and dressed to the nines but he couldn’t care less about any of them. Not when he had the most beautiful girl in the world on his arm. No one could ever compare.
“Doing okay?” He asks, watching you as you sipped your punch.
“Yeah.” You nod, cracking a smile.
“What?” He asks “What are you smiling at?”
“Nothing.” You laugh “Just thinking about how almost seven years later, we’re right back where we started.”
“What do you mean?” He asks.
“You…me…standing in a crowded school gym, drinking shitty fruit punch. It’s kind of symbolic, don’t you think?” You snort “Only thing that’s missing is that god awful yellow dress.”
“Hey!” Eddie laughs “I just so happened to like that god awful yellow dress. I thought it was cute.”
“I looked like a canary.”
“A cute canary.” Eddie jokes, causing you to shove his shoulder playfully.
“Ha. Funny.” You laugh.
“I’m not joking. You looked adorable. Even seven years later, I still think that.” Eddie admits, his lips spreading into a smile “Marigold.”
“Oh shut up.” You tease “Don’t get all sappy on me.”
“Can’t help it.” Eddie shrugs “I’m feelin’ all sentimental.”
“Well stop.” You joke “Being sentimental and cheesy isn’t exactly helping your brand, now is it?”
“Sweetheart, I am literally standing in the middle of prom right now. My brand is kind of shot to hell, don’t you think?” He points out.
“Fair enough.” You laugh.
“So…do you wanna dance?” Eddie asks, his eyes surveying all of the other prom-attendees as they dance to shitty pop music that Eddie wouldn’t dare to listen to in any other scenario. Just like he wouldn’t be caught dead dancing to it but he was willing to make that sacrifice. For you.
“Since when do you dance?” You ask, eyeing Eddie suspiciously.
“I don’t but since it’s prom and all, I’m willing to be a proper gentleman and make some hard sacrifices.” Eddie jokes, causing you to roll your eyes.
“Oh, my hero.” You drone sarcastically as you grin.
“Also, I don’t mind this song and might still remain in possession of my coolness if I just stand on the dance floor and spin you around in circles or something.” Eddie says “I also know how much you love this song.”
You were so wrapped up in Eddie, his easy-going smile and the way he looked tonight that you didn’t even realize that the DJ was playing one of your favorite songs; Come On Eileen by Dexys Midnight Runners.
“Alright.” You say, smiling “If you insist.”
Eddie lets you grab his hand, pulling him to the dance floor behind you as the chorus of the song kicks in. He places his right hand on your waist, his left hand grabbing yours as you begin to dance. In that moment, Eddie couldn’t help but overthink about how he didn’t want to step on your toes or how he might be dancing too off-beat for the fast, jaunty tune of the song. But as soon as you begin to laugh, his worries melt away.
Suddenly, he didn’t care if his movements were off or if his feet were in the right place or if he was holding your waist too tightly. All he could focus on was the grin you had on your face as he lifts his hand to spin you around and bring you back into his arms. The way your face lit up as he smiled back at you seemingly having the time of your life dancing to a song that he was just now realizing was about sexual arousal and a girl taking off her dress- which then prompted him to try hard not to think about you taking off your dress.
“You okay?” You ask, your voice breathy as he continued to twirl you around the dance floor.
“Yeah.” Eddie nods, trying to play it cool “Just didn’t realize how sexually suggestive these lyrics were.” He jokes.
“That’s seriously what you’re thinking about right now?” You laugh, shaking your head.
“I mean, can you blame me when I’m just now realizing why this song might be called Come On Eileen?” He says, causing you to wrinkle your nose in disgust.
“Ew, Eddie!”
“What?” He asks incredulously “I didn’t write the damn song!”
“Just shut up and dance with me.” You roll your eyes.
“Alright.” Eddie shrugs “But I’m totally gonna bring this up again the next time it comes on the radio.”
“You’re such a dork.” You say.
“Yeah but you love me.” He challenges, giving you a devilish smirk- and who are you to lie?
“Yeah,” You say “I do.”
Eddie turns his gaze onto you, as if on cue and perfectly in time with the next song that played. A slow song. But not just any slow song. As soon as the both of you heard it, you knew. This was far too good to be coincidence. This was fate.
“Is this?…” Eddie could barely even get the words out of his mouth before the smooth guitar riff leads into the first verse of the song- a song that immediately transports you back to the night of the 1983 Winter Formal.
“Dance with me?” You ask, butterflies overtaking your stomach as you looked into Eddie’s eyes. You didn’t have to say anything. He knew that you recognized the song. The song that played as the soothing soundtrack of his first kiss. Spandau Ballet’s True.
So true,
Funny how it seems.
Always in time but never in line for dreams,
Head over heels when toe to toe.
This is the sound of my soul,
This is the sound…
“Eds?”
Instead of answering, his hands instinctively wrap around your waist, pulling you close to him as he stares back at you- his eyes full of emotion. This song, the way you look tonight, how close he was holding you. All of it felt so right. So…incredibly…right.
I bought a ticket to the world,
But now I’ve come back again.
Why do I find it hard to write the next line,
Oh, I want the truth to be said.
You encircle your arms around Eddie’s neck, letting yourself be pulled into him- chest to chest. So close.
I know this much is true…
“Thank you.” You whisper, your eyes never leaving his “For bringing me tonight. I’m having a great time.”
“Yeah?” He asks, his eyes full of love, admiration…joy “I’m glad, sweetheart. I want you to be happy.”
“I am.” You admit, reaching towards him to tuck a stray hair behind his ear “I’m always happy when I’m with you.”
And Eddie’s heart suddenly felt like it was full- complete.
“Yeah?” He breathes.
“Yeah.”
I know this much is true…
“I don’t know if I already said this but you look pretty tonight.” He admits “Really pretty.”
“You think so?”
“Are you really asking me that?” Eddie scoffs “You’re easily the most beautiful girl in this room. I…I can’t stop staring at you.”
“Eds…” You say, ducking your head bashfully before Eddie catches your chin in his hand- lifting your face to meet his gaze.
“I’ve always thought you were pretty. So fucking pretty. Everything about you.” He smiles. Your heart beats hard in your chest as he reaches towards your clavicle, his fingers lightly touching your locket- his eyes full of adoration. Because he did adore you. He always had.
“I know I don’t say it a lot but meeting you was the best thing that ever happened to me.” He says “Sometimes I think about what my life would be like if you hadn’t left me that book. If I hadn’t noticed you on your bike and if you hadn’t saved me from getting my ass kicked by Tommy Hagan. I guess what I’m trying, and failing, to say is…I love you, Marigold, and I’d do anything for you. Beat up your shitty boyfriends, order your milkshake refills, let you listen to your shitty cassette tapes in my van.”
“Hey! My cassette tapes aren’t shitty.” You pout.
“Sweetheart, that’s not the point I’m trying to make. What I’m trying to say is that you mean a lot to me. I know it’s fucking sappy and gross but no matter what happens, I’m only ever going to want you in my life because things just wouldn’t…make sense if you weren’t. I just keep thinking that, throughout everything that’s happened, it’s always been me and you. You’re, like, my favorite person….or whatever.”
With a thrill in my head,
And a pill on my tongue.
Dissolve the nerves that have just begun
Listening to Marvin all night long.
This is the sound of my soul,
This is the sound….
“Eddie….you’re my favorite person.” You whisper, trying to hold back tears.
“Well, duh.” He says cockily, causing you to raise your hand to smack him on the arm “I’m kidding, I’m kidding.” He laughs, catching you by the wrist.
He slips his hand into yours, staring at it for a moment before bringing it to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to the back of it. Your heart flutters.
Always slipping from my hands,
Sand’s a time of its own.
Take your seaside arms and write the next line.
Oh, I want the truth to be known.
As he releases your hand, you let it rest on his chest- letting Eddie sway against you as you danced slowly in the crowded gym. But you were so focused on him that it seemed as though there was no one else in the room. That you and Eddie were the only two people here on earth.
I know this much is true…
The way he looked, the way he smelled, how close he was.
Eddie.
Your Eddie.
You lean forward, pressing your lips to his in a gentle, feather-light kiss. Mouths barely touching but enough to make Eddie’s body react as if a fire was ignited within him. Like he was awakened. Finally feeling just how he felt that night on your bedroom floor in 1983 when he kissed you for the first time. A night he’d never forget. A night he had tried to relive in his mind for years since.
You pull back, your eyes fluttering open as you are met with his big brown eyes.
“Shit,” You breathe “I shouldn’t have done that. I’m-“
But his mouth was back on yours- kissing you deeply as he held you close, his hands gripping your waist. He pulls back for a moment between kisses, resting his forehead against yours before whispering;
“Don’t be.”
The next thing you knew, you were in a heated battle against each other- a back and forth collision of hot, rough kisses as your hands grabbed at his face- cupping his jaw as his large hands gripped onto your hips like he were holding on for dear life. Like he never wanted to let go.
It was all teeth and tongue as he kissed you with desperation, wanting to taste every inch of your mouth as you both fought for dominance against each other. The more you kissed back, the rougher Eddie got and you loved it. You egged him on, giving him the encouragement he needed to just take you. Finally. After all of these years.
“Eds…” You gasp against his mouth as he nips at your bottom lip. Pulling it back with his teeth before releasing and reattaching his mouth to yours. He wanted to get lost in you. He wanted to let himself fall for you. Right then, right there. Kissing wasn’t enough. He wanted more.
More, more, more…
“Sweetheart,” He groans, squeezing your waist in his hands as he tries to control himself. Switching to giving you small pecks on your lips that caused you to whine in frustration. “Do you….do you wanna get out of here?”
He knew the question was risky. He knew what it might sound like it implied something sexual. That he wanted you- which he did. But that wasn’t necessarily his goal. He just wanted to be alone with you.
“You know, if you want to. You don’t have to-“
“Okay.” You agree, voice low and breathy as you stared into his eyes that were filled with just as much need as yours were.
“Okay?” Eddie asks, his voice containing a hint of shock. He didn’t really anticipate for what your answer would be but he certainly didn’t expect that.
“Let’s get out of here.” You say “Please.”
And how could Eddie say no to you when you sounded so needy and looked at him like that.
“Okay, sweetheart.” He says, swallowing as he tried to maintain as much self-control as he could. But it was hard. So…fucking…hard. “Whatever you want. Where do you wanna go?”
Neither of you thought this far ahead. Neither of you knew what was supposed to happen next.
“I don’t care.” You whisper “I just wanna be with you. Alone.”
Fuck.
“Okay, baby.” Eddie says “Okay.”
────────
Tell her.
Eddie’s head was battling with his heart as he watched you dip french fries into your vanilla milkshake as you both sat on the hood of his van near Lover’s Lake. It was past midnight. The first place you both could think of after leaving prom, and Eddie couldn’t think of anything more perfect. Shakes and fries from Benny’s, his van, and you- watching the rippling lake bathed in moonlight.
“Do you remember that time you threw up on my shoes?” Eddie laughs, practically doubling over as he recalled the memory of your first stolen beer together “God, you fucking hated it!”
“Yeah, well, it tasted like fucking piss water.” You exclaim in disgust “I shouldn’t have fucking listened to you. Every time I listen to you, I’m immediately reminded that you make the worst fucking decisions.”
“Yeah? Don’t forget that I chose to be friends with you.” He points out, causing you to punch him in the arm.
“Be careful, sweetheart.” Eddie tsks “Don’t start a fight that you can’t win.”
“Who said I can’t win?” You tease, attempting to punch him again but Eddie catches your arm to block your assault. Your eyes widen in surprise.
“What’s wrong, sweetheart? You shocked?” He teases “Didn’t expect me to fight back? Well, lucky for you, I don’t hit back but I do tickle.”
You begin to try and squirm away, knowing exactly what he was planning but you weren’t fast enough. His hands lock around your waist and begin their assault, causing you to squeal out.
“Eddie, no!” You laugh, shrieking as you try to get away.
“Nuh-uh! Get back here!” He laughs, going straight for your ribcage where he knew you were the most vulnerable.
“No!” You scream “No, no! Please stop!” Your voice filled with giggles.
“What’s that?” He asks “You want more?”
“No!” You gasp, trying to catch your breath as you try and push him away, tears brimming in your eyes as you squeal with laughter “Eds! I’m done, I’m done!”
“Nope! Finish what you started!” He teases.
“I can’t! I can’t!” You titter “I’m done! I surrender!”
“What?” Eddie asks, feigning as if he couldn’t hear you “What did you say, sweetheart? I couldn’t quite hear you.”
“I said I surrender!” You squeak between giggles “I surrender! You win!”
“That’s what I fucking thought.” He smirks, stopping his assault on you as you try to catch your breath.
“Fuck, I hate when you do that.” You say. But Eddie knew there was no bite to your words. Not with the way you’re grinning.
“Don’t start fights, princess. Not if you can’t hold your own. That’s, like, rule number one.” He joshes.
“Oh, fuck you.” You laugh. That’s when the nagging thoughts in Eddie’s head start up again.
Tell her. Finally fucking tell her how you feel.
“Sweetheart?” He starts, sitting up as his demeanor starts to become serious.
Tell her you love her. Tell her you’re in love with her.
“Yeah, Eds?” You look up at him, your eyes shining in the moonlight. Your face bathed in its soft glow and just when Eddie thought that seeing you when he picked you up that evening was the prettiest you ever looked, he was proven wrong. This was definitively the prettiest you ever looked. The most beautiful- and he was the only one that got to see you like this. No one else.
“I…There’s something I need to tell you.”
I love you. I’m in love with you. I’ve always loved you.
“…I actually have something that I need to tell you too.” You admit, training your eyes on him. His heart begins to beat hard and fast. Maybe this was it. Maybe this was the moment where he finally gets to hear you say it too.
“You go first.” He says, reaching to tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear- his thumb brushing against your cheek. This could finally be where his friendship with you evolved into something else. Something he had always been waiting for.
“I…okay.” You say, the nerves in your body taking over as you think about how you were going to say what you were about to say. What you had been thinking about since you found out. What you had been scared to tell him. “Eddie, I….”
Fuck, here it comes…
Eddie, I love you. Eddie, I’ve always wanted to be with you. Eddie, you’re the love of my life and I can’t imagine not being yours for one more second.
“…I got into NYU.”
It hit him with the force of a fucking train.
You what?
“…What?”
“I just found out a couple days ago. I…I applied during winter break just, you know, to see what would happen. I didn’t expect to actually get in. But…I did.”
But NYU was miles away. Hundreds of miles. Which meant that you would be hundreds of miles away. Suddenly, the world felt like it was turned upside down.
He felt sucked out of reality. He felt confused, angry, hopeless, proud- an amalgamation of emotions that completely contradicted each other and made no sense as they raged a war within him that he was trying so hard to hide.
You were leaving him.
“Eddie? You okay?”
And now he was expected to pretend that everything was okay. That he was happy for you.
“Yeah!” He says “Yeah, I’m- sweetheart, this is…”
The worst day of my fucking life.
“Crazy. Fucking crazy. I don’t know what to say. I just.…I’m so fucking proud of you.”
Eddie never thought he could mean something while also not mean it at the same time.
“I know…” You say, your voice breaking into a huge grin “I still can’t believe it.”
“Sweetheart, this is great. Really.” Eddie says, wishing that he actually meant it “I guess this means your fucking ex can eat shit now.”
“Well,” you say “That’s if I go.”
“What do you mean ‘if’?” Eddie questions.
“I mean, I haven’t accepted it yet. I…guess I’m still thinking about it.” You admit.
“What is there to think about? NYU is huge. Like, this is a once-in a-lifetime thing for you.” Eddie says.
“Yeah, I know.” You answer, chewing your bottom lip nervously as you think about what you were going to say next. How you were going to say it. “But…if I go to NYU…I’d have to leave Hawkins.”
“Well, yeah.” Eddie says as if it’s obvious “That’s, like, a given.”
“Eddie, I don’t know if I want to.”
And that confuses Eddie because for as long as you’ve been friends, the two of you had always had big city dreams of packing up one day and getting the fuck out of Hawkins and doing something with your lives. Now, here you were, actually granted the opportunity and you were backing out.
Why?
“What?” Eddie laughs, looking at you as if you were joking. But you weren’t- you were anything but. “Why wouldn’t you want to get out of this hellhole? Why would you ever want to stay here?”
And the answer hurt him more than he ever could’ve anticipated.
“Because you’re here, Eddie.”
Four words were all it took to completely rewrite his stance. It happened so fast that he couldn’t even process it. He just knew that, suddenly, you leaving Hawkins wasn’t the worst thing that could ever happen. Now it was the reality that you could be forcing yourself to stay here- for him.
“No.” It was all he could say. The only word to leave his lips.
“No?” You ask “What do you mean no?”
“No.” Eddie repeats “As in, you are not staying here. Not when you’ve got a fucking one-way ticket out of here. Sweetheart….no. Just no.”
“…Okay…” You reply cautiously “That’s definitely not how I expected you to react.”
“Guess we’re both full of surprises then.” Eddie answers.
“I just thought-“
“That I would be happy that you just decided to throw your entire life away to stay here in his shithole of a town to just fuck off with me? Why would I ever be happy about that?” He questions, catching you off-guard.
“I don’t know. I-“
“Listen, sweetheart….I don’t want to sound like an asshole when I say this but if that’s how I have to come off in order for you to hear me then fine. Do not throw your fucking life away. Especially not in this fucking town. Not for anyone and especially not for me.”
His brown eyes that normally held so much warmth for you had suddenly turned hard and cold. The shift was so abrupt that it was startling.
“But what if I want to stay here? What if I want to be here with you?”
“Sweetheart, you and I both know that you don’t belong here. Especially not with me. So, if you think that I’m just going to let you throw everything away like that then, sorry, but I’m not your guy. So, do yourself a fucking favor and get out of here. Because you’d be stupid to stay and let yourself rot somewhere that you’re better than.” His tone was mean, harsh, and rough. Completely throwing you for a loop. He had been so open, gentle, and laid-back. The Eddie you alway knew- until now.
“Who said that I’m too good to stay here? What if that’s what I want?” You whisper, watching the way that Eddie’s jaw clenches before he looks away from you.
“Sweetheart, that’s not what you want. You don’t want to stay here. And I’m not gonna let you stay here. Not for me. That’s the last thing I’ll say about it.” He states.
“You don’t get to make that decision.” You say, your tone just as hard and final.
“You’re right. I don’t. But I do get the choice to walk away.”
And that nearly depletes you.
“Really? So, what? If I stay here you’re just…not gonna talk to me anymore?”
“If that’s what it’s going to take for you to get out of Hawkins and make something of yourself then yeah. That’s exactly what that means.”
“So you’re just going to throw all of this away, huh?” You ask, voice shaking “You’re just going to end things? Just to get your way?”
“If that’s what’s best for you.”
“And what exactly am I supposed to do with that, Eddie?” You question, shaking your head at his audaciousness.
“Whatever you need to. Just don’t expect me to stand by and watch you waste your fucking life here. I fucking can’t.”
“Okay.” You say, trying to control your chin from wobbling with tears “I guess that’s it then.”
“Yeah.” Eddie shrugs coldly “Guess so.”
Because as much as it fucking pained him, he knew this was what he had to do. For years he thought that there was nothing he wouldn’t do for you. Turns out, he was wrong. There was one thing he wouldn’t do and this was it. As much as he hated the idea of not having you, there was one thing he hated more- and that was the idea of clipping your wings and taking away a life you could have. A better one. Even if he wasn’t in it.
────────
1988
He stood on your front porch, knocking at your door at an ungodly hour. He didn’t even know what time it was. Just that it was late and that all the lights in your complex were off. He knew that it wasn’t an acceptable time to do this but he had so much on his heart and mind that he couldn’t wait a second longer without seeing you. Face-to-face.
He knew you were probably sleeping. He knew that he was probably waking you up. He knew that you probably didn’t even want to see him but he needed to- right now. Before he could pussy out and run away again like he always did instead of facing his feelings once and for all. There was so much he left unsaid and he couldn’t fucking do it anymore.
Your porch light flicks on, bathing him in its yellow glow before he saw the blinds on the front window pop open just a bit. Within seconds, your front door flung open- revealing the sight of you wearing one of his old t-shirts that he must have left there and forgotten about. His stomach fills with nerves as soon as he sees you.
“Eddie?” You call out, rubbing at your tired eyes “What are you doing here? Wh-“ But the words were caught in your throat as soon as you got a good look at him. He was a mess. His eyes were red-rimmed and puffy- his face tear-stained as he was still dressed in the same thing he was wearing when he had practically ran out of Steve’s house. He looked like he hadn’t even gone home.
“I’m in.”
You look at him, trying to make sense of what he was saying.
“What?”
“I’m a fucking asshole.” He starts “And I will spend the rest of my life knowing that you and our baby deserve so much better. I don’t come from money like Harrington does and I probably won’t be able to afford to give you everything you’ll ever want but I fucking love you and I’ll always fucking love you even when shit fucking gets hard like it is right now. But you know that just as much as I do because we’ve always been this way. We figure it out together like we always do. I know I fucking said that I don’t want kids but now I know that if I’m going to have kids then I want it to be with you because I can’t imagine raising a fucking psychotic little hellion with anyone else but you. Sweetheart, you’ve got to be crazy to want to have my fucking kid but if that’s what you want to do then let’s fucking do it, okay? Together. You asked me if I was in or out. Well, I’m in. I’m all fucking in.”
Eddie looked at you. Really looked at you. His best friend, his favorite person, his first love- and now, the mother of his child.
Fuck, he thought. How fucking crazy. The mother of his child…
“And….this is what you want?” You ask, trying to keep your voice firm and even “You’re sure?”
“Sweetheart, I’ve never been more sure about anything.” Eddie says “I can’t promise that I’ll be perfect. I can’t promise that I’m not going to fuck up sometimes and that I’m always going to know what to do at all the right times. But, I mean, it’s me….I feel like fucking neither of us expects that. But what I do know is that you’re my favorite person in the world and I want to be right next to you when you do this. I’d be fucking stupid not to. I’m fucking scared but I couldn’t imagine leaving you. I…I don’t want to. I want to stay right here next to you. I mean, if you’ll have me…”
“You won’t run away?” You ask, looking in his eyes as you say it.
“No.” He shakes his head “I’m not going to run away.”
You stare at him for a beat before turning to retreat inside of the house, leaving him there on the porch.
“What are you-“
But you don’t slam the door on him. Instead, you return momentarily with something in your hands before you hold it out for him to take.
“It’s a sonogram.” You state, handing it over to him as he stares down at it- trying to make sense of what he was looking at “It’s from my first ultrasound. It’s the baby.”
And the words struck him like lightening.
The baby.
His baby.
“Wait…” He says, feeling elated and lightheaded at all the same time “This is…”
“I know it doesn’t look like much but they’re growing. The doctor said that they’re about the size of a kidney bean right now.”
“This tiny little thing is inside of you?” Eddie mutters, trying to make sense of it all “Right now?”
“Yeah.” You nod “I can’t believe it either but yeah. They’re in there.”
Eddie watches as you move your hand to your tummy as you rub it. The sight of it was enough to melt his heart. He had a baby in there.
“Holy fuck.” He lets out a laugh “We’re having a baby….”
“Yeah,” You whisper, looking up at him with a small smile “We’re having a baby.”
“We’re really doing this.” He states.
“We’re really doing this.” You confirm, causing Eddie to laugh again.
“You’re fucking crazy, you know that?” He says, instinctively reaching his hand out to rest against your belly. A belly that housed a tiny little bean sized thing that was part of him- part of you.
“Yeah, I am.” You agree, placing your hand over his “But you love me.”
And Eddie doesn’t skip a beat. He didn’t have to. Not when he was looking at you in a whole new light. The woman who was giving him something he never knew he needed- love, a sense of hope, a purpose. A baby.
And for the first time, he said it in the way where he had meant it more than just a sense of romance. He meant it in the sense that was more than physical and emotional attraction. He meant it in a way that you felt like home. A home where he finally belonged. A home that he never wanted to leave.
“Yeah. I do.” He agrees, looking at you with so much adoration. As if you held the world. Because, in a way, you did. You were now holding his entire world and he could never feel more grateful.
blakekathryn
germansingergirl
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