Lauren Cuthbertson - backstage during a dress rehearsal of A Winter's Tale at the Royal Opera House
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Lauren Cuthbertson - backstage during a dress rehearsal of A Winter's Tale at the Royal Opera House
The thing about surviving medical child neglect is that you'll spend a lot of your adult life sitting in doctor's offices and trying to explain that you experience symptoms and no they aren't new—you can't remember when they started, for all you know you've never known a life without them—but it does feel like maybe that isn't something everyone experiences, possibly?
No you should be mad, taking care of your child's health needs is the bare minimum and some of our parents didn't even do that, even when they absolutely could've. Often times because they held bigoted anti-child beliefs that lead them not to take our pain seriously.
If you don't take your child to the doctor or at least comfort & take care of them and let them rest, they will suffer later in life. The reason many parents don't think about that is because they don't respect their children enough to think they deserve to even have their basic bottom-of-the-pyramid needs taken care of.
Either way, they failed you and that's something you should very much be mad about.
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How'd I cut back on caffeine? The usual. Diet, discipline. One thing that helped a lot was that I harnessed the void. I tapped into the little incipient void which sits at the heart of every thinking animal, and I fed it. I hatefully nurtured it with every malicious thought, every unkind impulse, every knee-jerk reaction best discarded, and it gorged on these things it metastasized. It swelled past the confines of my heart and fought for space with with my stomach, my liver, my intestines, winning handily, subsuming each in turn, until I was little more than a man-shaped howling wrathful abyss sheathed in taut, paper-thin human hide, wandering through this fallen world in anticipation of whatever fleeting offense finally catalyzes my inevitable rupture and detonation. And now I'm down to two, maybe three cups a day
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