Witty Title™

I have a blog theme, I just don't know what it is yet

[languageoclock]

when you’re not sure whether a german noun is masculine or neuter so you reword your entire sentence to use it in the dative case

[livemasbrand-deactivated2017053]

at the press of a button burt will send you his bees

[27-umbrellas]

your favorite character in the umbrella academy is just whichever character’s monumental fuck-ups and deep-seeded flaws you identify with the most

[yesterdaysprint]

The Brooklyn Daily Eagle, New York, December 26, 1946

[nohomohank-deactivated20200218]

it: chapter two (2019)

insp

[valtsv]

i'm that rat type, concealed inside his hat type, control his every act type,

[theyreallintofortnitedude]

I will never be able to explain what my brain does when it sees the word tgwdlm

tuhguhwuhduhluhmuh? tegewedeleme? tuhgoowuhdihlemay? idek man

[aintnothinglikeadikrat]

I say tugwuldem and an no one can tell me I’m wrong

[prettyaroace]

jeff sings “the guy who didn’t like musicals” in my head when I see tgwdlm

[factbot]

[despazito]

the second radish is 29 feet away

[tranarchist]

[evanbuckleyed]

one day hozier is gonna cover hallelujah and by god it’ll kill me but what a way to go

[iskwekan]

customer service worker: *apologizes for something very minor and inconsequential*

me, in tears: you’ve done nothing wrong, ever, in your life

[furiousgoldfish]

one rational braincell: there can be more than one task done during the day

all other braincells: you know what, now it’s zero

[faggotri]

honestly the best thing i’ve done in the past year was replacing “i wanna die” with “i wanna commit a crime.” same humor and sentiment without the suicidal ideation

[faggotri]

thank you SO much for this tag

[appledevice]

[marisatomay]

in many ways tumblr is truly garbage but the fact that your follower count is not public and there’s no way to become “verified” is so sexy

[fuckyeah-animalcrossing]

[veggiedaddy]

[rosewater1997]

Everyday is like. Endure Emotions and Complete Tasks. Can I die

[rheaseahorn]