Jacob with some spot-on Ilya character analysis (and general thoughts on sex-as-self)
It's Open With Ilana Glazer
$LAYYYTER
Three Goblin Art
todays bird
almost home
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titsay

izzy's playlists!
Mike Driver

Andulka

tannertan36
Sade Olutola

Product Placement

Kiana Khansmith

Kaledo Art
Claire Keane

❣ Chile in a Photography ❣
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DEAR READER
Cosimo Galluzzi

Discoholic 🪩
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@namida221b
Jacob with some spot-on Ilya character analysis (and general thoughts on sex-as-self)
It's Open With Ilana Glazer
Patron Saints of One Way Trips
Shane writes hockey romance* novels in his spare time and publishes them under a pseudonym (John Dutch) and no one knows except his agent.
A wag somewhere picks one up and discovers the hockey is really accurate and well written from a technical perspective (plus it’s super hot) and convinces her boyfriend or husband or whatever to read it and then somehow it becomes popular among hockey players as a thing that’s kind of a gag but people are also seriously reading it.
Ilya is extremely confused that CLIFF is trying to convince him to read a book but figures he’ll give it a try. Fifty pages in, reading the book on the plane, he suddenly realizes he recognizes the sex scene.
He never says anything to Shane, but starts casually leaving Shane’s books lying around for Shane to notice during their hook-ups.
*i was going to go with ‘gay hockey romance novels’ but then realized cishet hockey romance novels would be objectively funnier
Hbd!! Anything fma, please?
a continuation of 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15
"General Gran is dead?" Roy asks incredulously.
Maes doesn't repeat himself, just takes another long swallow of Roy's whiskey.
He's been opposing them from the beginning and was a bastard on top of it, so it's not exactly like it's a huge loss, but, "Who killed him?"
It's not like people end up in that many pieces on accident.
"No witnesses," Maes says.
He blanches. "How many casualties?"
"None."
"The man's house was practically leveled!" he snaps. "You're seriously telling me that happened with no one noticing and no one else killed?"
Maes doesn't answer him again. He just keeps drinking.
Roy's about to start himself. Of all the times for this to happen, it has to be when King Pakor's personal slave is staying with them. The last thing they need is Van Edris hearing about this, but with something this large, he's not sure how much a language barrier can prevent.
Happy birthday!!! Heated rivalry?
a continuation of 1 2
There's cameras and lights all around him and he's flying high on the victory of another game won when an interviewer for some pop magazine asks, "Any update regarding the Lily situation?"
Shane feels himself flush and light up at the same time and tries to tap it back down, tries to make it something that can reduced to just coming off the ice and another job well done. He should say no comment, he should brush this aside, he should be redirect. Instead he says, "I got kissed."
It ends up going viral, with the most common comments being some variation of if he doesn't love me like this then i don't want it and Lily you lucky bitch.
Ilya has the clip saved on his phone.
Happy Valentines Shana! SIAT Percy and Tonks or something Heated Rivalry?
a continuation of 1
Ilya slept fitfully and curled around the spot Shane had been, trying to lie to himself about chasing his scent on the sheets. He feels like shit and he's in a shit mood and his teammates laughing like a bunch of hyenas really isn't helping matters.
"What so funny?" he snaps, poking at rubbery eggs that look worse than usual. They're never staying at this hotel again.
"Hollander got wasted last night," Marleau snickers, "and rejected, apparently. Maybe he is mortal like the rest of us."
"What?" His stomach drops. It's a good thing he didn't eat anything, because it would be crawling up his throat otherwise. "What are you saying?"
Someone's phone gets passed down to him. It's a screen recording of a live and Shane's there, wearing jeans that absolutely do not fit him and maybe make Ilya's mouth water a little. He can't remember ever seeing him tipsy, but here he is very obviously drunk, face flushed and eyes glassy.
There's a slur to his words as he talks, a light downturn to his lips that Ilya wants to lick. He's talking about him. He's talking about a girl, but it's him, it's definitely him. He almost reaches up to his hair and just barely stops himself.
Shane likes his curls.
"The comments are crazy," Marleau says. "It's full of girls offering to let Hollander kiss them whenever he wants."
He won't be reading those. In public, anyway. "I see," he says, mouth dry. He grabs a bagel from the table and stands. "You' are all giving me a headache. I will finish packing now."
There's a chorus of jeers behind him that he ignores. He texts Shane and then waits, pacing back and forth, trying to think. Shane's words keep replaying in his mind.
There's a hesitant knock at his door.
He yanks it open and Shane steps inside, swallowing. His eyes are bloodshot and his hair's limp, pale in a way that could be from the hangover or something else. "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have gone out last ni-"
Ilya kisses him.
Shane is still for half a second and then he's melting into him. Ilya shoves him against the door and cradles his face in his hand, kissing him again and again, shallow and quick, then deeper.
God, he's missed this. He'd missed it last night too. He thought he was being smart, that he was protecting himself, that Shane being pissed at him wasn't as important as making sure that Shane didn't break his heart.
He hadn't realized it wasn't just his heart on the line here.
Shane likes him.
"Sorry," he mumbles, kissing the corner of his lips like he'd wanted to when he saw the video. "Sorry I did not kiss you."
"It's okay," Shane says, breathless and overwhelmed and leaning his face into Ilya's hand. It makes his chest clench. Ilya thinks how easy it would be for him to have just as much of Shane as all those girls in his comments, how Shane is gorgeous and perfect and he could have anyone he wanted, man or woman. Clumsy and earnest and so beautiful. Who would say no to that?
Not Ilya. He's made it a habit not to want what's not meant for him to protect against when he inevitably loses it. It's smart, rational, the only sensible decision he's ever managed to make.
"I mean," Shane swallows, searching his face. "It's just fucking, right? We don't owe each other anything."
He's not that great at sensible decisions anyway. "Would you like to?"
He feels it when Shane stops breathing. "What?"
"Would you like for us to owe each other something?" he asks.
Shane bites his bottom lip, his eyes bright. He swallows before saying, "Yes."
Ilya kisses him again, Shane pulling him closer and sliding a hand through his hair.
Now that he knows that Shane wants to kiss him, he doesn't know how he's going to stop.
i do have to say that no matter how shitty any sort of media is or how shitty your own creations are. always remember
LLM psychosis is simply the democratisation of being surrounded by yes-men and unctuous toadies, an experience previously only accessible to dictators and kings and cult leaders and venture capitalists
Bingge finds a world with a free Shen Yuan for the taking and kidnaps him, as Bingges do. But for some reason kidnaps him in his own world instead into Bingge’s world.
He does a reasonable search for any weapons or anything suspicious but lets him keep his phone. Luo Binghe may be smart, but the only things open on Shen Yuan’s phone are web novels and maybe music or video apps. So, clearly a scholarly device and not something he could use to escape.
Shen Yuan does as Shen Yuans do around Luo Binghes and promptly discarded any possible reasonable reaction.
He turns off any tracking on his phone and starts live streaming on his Peerless Cucumber account.
The PIDW community starts a hunt, following them across the country. Many of them think it’s a game, some sort of organized event. A few think it’s real and join the hunt any way.
Airplane, after a bit of back and forth over the extent to which Peerless Cucumber would troll him, absolutely 100% believes it’s real (he knows his character), takes the little cash he has, and begins making his way to the nearest border with the intent of leaving the country and changing his name.
Which, of course, is the same direction Luo Bingge is headed. He did create him, after all.
I can has fic please? Please? Please I has fic?
I’ve never really written fanfiction (and don’t really have the time to try rn), but if anyone does please let me know!
people talk about how we need to bring back "don't feed the trolls" rhetoric for modern internet ragebait and I agree but also I think the most useful thing from the Old Internet that I miss is LURKING
be a lurker. just read things and think about them without feeling the need to weigh in or call out or disseminate everything you encounter. it's so nice and so freeing and it's a good way to learn things.
I have frequently regretted getting involved in shit that didn't involve me online but you know what I've never regretted doing? Lurking. literally lurk moar
Tiger by 十筆斎
Everybody wants you to play pretend about who you are but when they figure out you’re pretending they get so mad!! “You Lied” and you liked me better when I was lying. So where exactly does that put us.
today i just (remembers to maintain privacy online) did something really cool. you have to trust me
everyone shut da fuck up this is the only thing that matters
Oh My God Damn
260603 - namjoon’s instagram story
I like to think they’re tucked away in a corner at a farmers market somewhere.