pairing: non-idol! taesan x reader
genre: enemies to lovers + college AU
word count: 2.7k
cw: small mention of inadequate feelings ( and a jaehyun feature. )
The both of you existed in a bizarre duality. βTaesan and Y/N,β both deeply entrenched in the world of music production and composition, meaning your academic paths constantly overlapped. It was almost inevitable that you shared the same major-related classes, but fate, or perhaps a mischievous scheduler, insisted on pairing you and Taesan in unrelated electives too. You both were on campus roughly ninety percent of the time. The remaining ten percent was spent in shared, quiet spaces; the over-roasted coffee shop or the worn-out park bench. Not the most creative spots, but anywhere they could seek inspiration for their next composition. Despite this constant, almost suffocating proximity, an unnerving silence persisted. You felt you should at least be on a first-name basis. Yet, Taesan offered no acknowledgment. At All. Whenever you saw him, he spared you nor anyone else a glance, headphones on, existing solely in his own musical bubble.
This silence was never more painful than during class presentations. Your work would invariably receive positive feedback from peers, but Taesanβs seat would remain conspicuously silent. Not only does it piss you off, but it makes you a bit insecure. In response, of course, you adopted the same, cold tactic of choosing to ignore him entirely. It was clear to anybody that he was a musical prodigy. A master of instrumentals, lyrics, and arrangement. His brilliance, so casually displayed, fed a quiet, persistent insecurity in you, prompting you to push harder, striving for something just as amazing. What you couldn't see was that Taesan felt that same sharp, competitive ache whenever your work played, sounding so effortlessly brilliant. This cold, silent competition of "who did it better?" defined your first semester and...relationship? Both succeeded, both excelled, achieving almost identical high marks.Β
Then, the curriculum shifted.
For the new semester, the professor announced the final project; a collaborative piece. Partners were assigned, and with an almost predictable, soul-crushing inevitability, you and Taesan were paired. The chances, it turned out, were 100%. For days, the silence held firm. Too stubborn to be the first to break the ice, you continued to ignore him, and he did the same. The project timeline was ticking, but the tension was a physical barrier between you. The ceasefire was forced by an unexpected outside force: Myung Jaehyun. Your fellow music major and apparent mutual friend.Β
A text notification broke your focus one afternoon-
Jaehyun: βwoww, why is Taesan asking me for your phone number βΊοΈβ
You stared at the text, momentarily dumbfounded, then immediately defaulted to the practical.
You: βProbably because we have a project to do?β
Jaehyun: βprobably? hm.β he replied just seconds after, the text vibrating with implied knowledge.
You: βJust give him my number and be quiet.β
Jaehyun: βdont think I forgot about you saying you have a crush on this βkinda rude guy in my classββ
You: βI NEVER said thatβ
Jaehyun: βokay. βheβs so rude but so coolβ¦kind of admirable.β same thing, y/nβ
You ignored the jab. Moments later, a text arrived from an unfamiliar number, requesting to βjust meet at the campus libraryβ¦if you want.β
The walk to the library was a knot of anxiety. Taesan had never addressed you directly. How were you supposed to act? Once inside, you scanned the tables and spotted him, focused on his Mac, scrolling through GarageBand. βHe still uses GarageBand?β you thought to yourself, but made sure to un-furrow your brows before he noticed. You walked over and sat down, hoping the move was noticeable enough to warrant attention. It was. He immediately took off his headphones and looked up, straightening his posture. The silence that followed was agonizingly awkward. βSoβ¦what do you wanna do?β he finally asked. You mirrored his caution. βI donβt know, what do you wanna do?β
More silence.
βWell I guess we can pick a theme first. Do we want light, dark, theatrical, poppyβ¦β he offered, seemingly trying to break the tension. βIβm not sureβ¦umβ you start, keeping an eye on his body language as you spoke. It was just as awkward as yours. You brought up something the professor had mentioned doing for the project. βWe do have the option to make it into a song instead of just the instrumentals. I know that you sing, so did you want to do that instead? Or?β You offered, still weary of his reaction and rejection. βOnly if you sing too,β he replied, eyes locking onto your own now that you piqued his interest. βIβm not that great at singing thoughβ¦β you admitted, feeling your cheeks warm at the memory of past failed attempts. βI think your voice is great,β he stated simply, immediately replacing his overall persona of nonchalance with a confusing rush of flustered bashfulness. In that moment, his tongue moved too fast for his brain to process what he was going to admit. βWhen did you hear me sing?β you asked, stunned. Taesan froze, his eyes widening slightly. βJust a few times when Iβd go to the production room, butΒ you were already in there.β You nodded slowly, trying not to overthink the implication that he had been listening. More than once, βWe can make it a song then. I donβt mind singing.β You say, trying to move past that conversation. Again, he just nods. Though he didnβt say it, he was grateful for your decision. βGreat, so now we pick a theme.β he says, opening his notebook. They settled on 'dark'. Not scary or overtly sad, but something with a deliberate, low energy and tempo designed to convey a complex emotional feeling. Something everyone could interpret in their own way.Β
This project should be lightwork, especially with the two of you combined. Yet slowly, painstakingly, you began to collaborate. You were genuinely surprised when Taesan suggested using elements from one of your previous projects from the last semester. He had been paying attention. In turn, you recommended merging both of your instrumentals together to form a powerful lead-in to the chorus, a true synthesis of your individual sounds. When the combined track played back, Taesanβs face lit up. He worked excitedly, turning back to you with a genuine smile when the section hit exactly right. It was the first time you had ever seen him truly smile at you, and it ripped a flutter through you heart. βHeβs cute when he works, tooβ¦β you thought, watching his lips pout and cheeks puff in concentration. Then, you sternly reminded yourself to focus. Now is not the time. You had only discussed the project with him. Thatβs all you will let it come to.
A few more weeks passed, and the song was nearly complete, the lyrics perfectly placed by Taesan. Feeling the project momentum nearing a fever pitch, and wanting to put some distance between yourself and him with your confusing, escalating feelings, you suggested the both of you take a short break to focus on other classes. He agreed, of course, joking that your voice was βactually starting to haunt my dreams.β He laughed, but immediately worried if youβd take it negatively. Itβs safe to say the master of many crafts hadnβt mastered the art of flirting. You felt a small pang of sadness, resigning to the fact that their connection, however deep it became after all these days working together, was purely platonic. Despite his past silence, Taesan was incredibly observant; he remembered your past work, memorized the sticker ticket on your latte order and brought it without a word? Sweet, yet you had to remind yourself again. He is definitely just being friendly. Yet, a few days later, Taesan texted, asking you to meet him at the cafe. You were caught up on your assignments and couldn't claim to be busy without the fear of him finding out. You had the same classes, after all, and you both were lucky your professors didnβt assign much out-of-class work. So, you agreed. When you get there, you expected him to be there with his laptop open, ready to work. Instead, he was just sitting at a table, surface bare, scrolling on his phone. Your confusion must have been obvious. When you sat down, tapping your foot nervously, he asked if you were okay. βWhereβs your computer?β you asked. βI left it in my dorm room. We were taking a break, right?β he asked, slightly confused, eyes darting to from your face to his hands multiple times. βOhβ¦I thought you asked me to meet you here to work on the projectβ¦β you stated. He paused, scratched the back of his neck, and gave you a pretty awkward, yet sincere smile. βI should have said it in the text, but I was just hungry. Thought you wouldβve wanted something from here too. I doubt you ate todayβ¦Jaehyun mentioned you forget to eat sometimes.β He said so casually, passing you one of the paper menus. One out of two of your internal questions, βAre we friends or just co-workers?β, was answered. You were friends, and that you could make peace with.
You both ordered food and drinks, which he paid for, with the promise that you both talked about anything and everything but music: how both of you met Jaehyun, your old pets, and the infamous half-decade old βis water wetβ debate. The conversation flowed easily for nearly two hours until you guys realized they were the only customers left. You quickly left to let the workers close up shop, and started the walk back to the dorms. The silence returned, but this time it wasnβt coldβit was comfortable. Taesan spoke first. βIβm glad we got paired together. If we didnβt, Iβd think youβd still hate me,β he said, a relieved huff of laugh escaping him. You stopped walking. βI never hated you! I thought you hated me up until maybe two weeks ago?β
βTwo weeks ago? Why?β he asked, brows knit together and eyes squinted. You couldnβt believe it. He thought you were being ridiculous. You laughed, disbelief heavy in your lungs. βYou never reacted to my presentations!β
βNeither did you.β He replied as he crossed his arms and took a step back to look at you, amused at your reactions. βYou also never talked to me in any of the classes we had together,β you shot back.
βYeah, because you never talked to me!β He laughed again, and you both sighed. The sound of pure realization. βWowβ¦weβre the worst at communicating, huh.β you said, your hands now propped on your hips as you shook your head to yourself.
βThereβs thatβ¦and, I was too scared to react to your compositions. I felt like if I gave any comment or critique, then youβd ruin my life when I presented,β he confessed. You laughed again, thinking it was some sort of joke, until you examined his face. Heβs not laughing. Your response was anything but smooth, stammering for a few seconds before you eventually spat it out. βYou really think that your songs werenβt good? Everyone always dreaded presenting after you because we knew youβd have something amazing. The whole class loves what you make, you know that?β You projected your deep insecurity onto the collective "everyone." He smiled, a quiet thank you. βWell, knowing that you donβt actually hate me makes me feel even better than knowing the rest of the class likes my work.β
You felt your heart lighten, a genuine smile replacing the shock.Β
Days rolled into a pattern. Texts from Taesan were common, ranging from requests like βDo you think you can help me study for psych?β, to random, endearing and sometimes nagging observations, such as βI really think that giving the ducks on campus so many treats to eat isnβt good for them.β Your relationship grew exponentially, becoming a fast, strong close friendship. You managed to keep your romantic feelings at bay, perfectly happy with this new, profound level of connection. Taesan was a booster, an antidote to stress, making you even wonder why you wereΒ stressed in the first place.
Then, you returned to the project.
The final touches went smoothly. Taesan recorded his vocals, and you edited them into the background of the track, adding distortions for effect. He listened back, nodding, smiling at the results. You asked him what should be changed and braced yourself to finally get the vocalization of his critique. Yet, he just shakes his head no. βI really donβt have to fix anything. You did great, as always,β he said, pausing the track.
As you were about to reply, the lights in the studio dimmed slightly. The system powered down. He stared blankly at the dead screen, waiting for it to reboot, his irritation evident. Once the computer came back to life, he checked the file to find that the file, somehow, was gone. ββ¦I donβt think the file saved, y/n, Iβm sorry,β he said worriedly, clicking through folders in a desperate search. βWhat? No, itβs fine! I saved it on my usb before we even opened it on here, remember?β You told him, and pulled the drive attached to your βschool flairβ keychain. The relief on his face was instant and profound as he stood up and pulled you into a tight hug, making you laugh at his dramatic reaction. βGodβ¦why are you so great?β he asked, shaking you slightly before finally letting go. You shrugged and smiled at him for his uncharacteristically silly gesture before turning back to the computer to plug the drive in. Before the metal touched the port, you heard him say:
βI could really kiss you right now.β
You tried to dismiss it, to process it as justΒ one of his sudden, playful, relief-induced jokes. You turned back to face him, trying to keep from becoming awkward, but the semi-forced laugh you let out failed you.
βYeah. The same to youβ¦β you replied, the words echoing their true feelings, a painful, ignored truth scratching at the surface of your heart. You truly thought your emotions would eventually fade. But, the sudden feeling of his hand resting gently on your cheek, warm and deliberate, and his lips on yours just seconds after made it now an impossible thought.
Your mind went blank, processing the shock of the action before the feeling took over. When it did, you didn't hesitate, kissing him back with all the confusing, bottled-up affection you possessed.
When you broke apart, breathless, you had to ask, βIf I didnβt say I wanted to kiss you too, what would you have done it?β Holding and swinging your hands in front of him, he carefully thinks of a response. βI wouldβve asked if I could. And then youβd say yes, and then Iβd kiss you,β he said, his expression only serious, before cracking up at the absurdity of his own confidence. You started to laugh too, and playfully pushed him. βHow would you have known Iβd say yes?β You asked.
βI mean, when you tell people like Jaehyun a secret, it never stays a secret, you know?β
Your eyebrows shot up as the realization hit.
βSo you knew I had a crush on you this whole time? And never said or did anything about it?β
βI had to be sureβ¦It was a while ago that he told me. Didnβt know if you were like. Already with someone else?β
βI think you wouldβve known. We literally saw each other everywhere, remember?β
He just nodded, his smile widening into something radiant. βWell. We could make up for that time right now.β He stated confidently before the fear that youβd misinterpret his words hit. βLike, dating. Each other is what I meant. We could date nowβ¦if you want, maybe-β
βOf course, Taesan.β You said, allowing the final, confusing knots of your relationship to finally unravel into something beautiful and certain.
βWoah, actually?β He asked, his smile impossibly bigger.
βYes! You thought after all of this, Iβd say no?β
βHonestly didnβt think this far inβ¦β He confessed, looking off in the distance while absentmindedly playing with your fingers, inevitably bringing back that familiar feeling in your stomach. Youβre about to say something until your text notification sounds.
Jaehyun: βwhatever you two painfully oblivious love bugs are doing in the production room, I need you to make it quick pls. Iβm about to lose inspo.β
Β Taesan reads it over your shoulder, an amused smile forming on his lips. βLetβs not tell him about this yet. Unless youβre ready for him expecting us to thank him for this happening.β He says
βTrue. Even though we shouldβ¦he gave you my number. That saved our grade, too.β
βYeah, you werenβt gonna talk to me at all, huh?β
βNope.βΒ
my asks + reqs are always open! I would love to hear from anyone <3
