"You Are Complicit" Dear parents, teachers, camp counselors, daycare workers, and others that are responsible for the well-being of children and young adults...When they tell you they are being bullied, and you tell them "Nobody likes a tattletale" or the many similar cop-out phrases like it, you are complicit.
You are complicit in the bullying of millions of children and young adults who experience this every single day. You are complicit in the emotional and physical damage caused by that abuse and when a child or young adult takes their own life to escape the continuous unforgiving onslaught of the bullies left completely unchecked by your apathetic response, you are complicit in their deaths.
Their well-being was your responsibility and you failed them. Your job in that position is to shape the worldview of the children in your care, and when you do this, you are teaching the bullies that there is nothing wrong with their actions, and you are teaching the victims that they are alone in this, their pain does not matter, and no one will protect them.
And when the child is disabled the situation can be even worse. We often don't have the physical, mental or emotional capability to defend ourselves, and we often need more protection than our peers. Those like me who grew up Autistic, confused and scared of this alien world are particularly vulnerable as we are often bullied worse than others, and are even more confused as to why.
And quite frankly, I'm sick of waking up to find another Autistic person beaten, murdered, or taking their own life because of this bullying and the people who allow it to continue. The average life expectancy of an Autistic person is 37 because of our high murder and suicide rates, and we lose more every single day. I am 35 now, and it is gut-wrenching that so few of us make it to my age, and even fewer past that.
So...when a child or young adult comes to you for protection and tells you they are being bullied by their siblings, their schoolmates, or any other children they come into contact with, if instead of intervening and doing what's right, you would rather wash your hands of the situation like you were Pontius Pilate, you should not be a parent, you should not be a teacher, you should not be involved in the upbringing of children in any way.
And if any of you are thinking "that's not my job," "they should grow a backbone," "I'm teaching them to stand up for themselves" or one of those other pull-string doll phrases, you are a coward and you are unfit for your position. And, if this is who you are, and you are in a position of responsibility involving children, don't you dare ask why the world is the way it is. Instead, head to the store, buy yourself a mirror and look directly into it because the answer will be right in front of you.
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