𝒇𝒂𝒔𝒕 𝒍𝒂𝒏𝒆

[nicklehoy]

pinterest . musings . tw self harm suggestions / narcissism / prostitution / drugs / nsfw content / being a horrible human being . 

“ money can’t buy happiness but i’d rather cry in my ferrari . “ “ sorry ,  i only love cocaine , whores and my mama . “ 

for the most part nick was raised by a regular working class couple who married young and only had one child ... him . he was always encouraged to pursue his dreams and he quickly found out that he had a talent for sports . by the age of twelve or thirteen then he was one to watch and quickly propelled to fame and scouted by eighteen , he ended up landing a scholarship that he didn’t really need . 

tw self harm , nick developed a habit of self harming when he didn’t meet his own standards . sure , he thought he was the fucking best but he was always living up to his own reflection and so it was an endless life of self obsession and then rage . 

nick was competitive , an ego maniac in every way ... not just in sports . if someone had a sob story then his had to be worse , if someone had a girlfriend , his had to be hotter . he went through women like he went through lines of cocaine . fast and furious , ending a little bloody . 

nick would make up whatever came into his head when he became famous , lying and pretending he was fatherless ... pretending he was raised by some single mom who slaved away in a diner . he wanted to be relatable so he manufactured a life for himself and even sold his own story to the tabloids leading to his parents wondering what on earth was wrong with him but he just laughed in their faces . they didn’t get it , they were too simple and boring . 

in the public eye , nick was a rockstar . sexy , young , interesting . he had a new woman constantly and always looked good . the double standard of how these women he dated were portrayed was laughable but he didn’t care because women were just objects to him and they could be thrown away at any moment . 

nick didn’t just have an addiction to drugs , he was addicted to sex . he paid for hookers almost every night and he had more respect for them than any woman that he’d actually had a conversation with because they knew what they were there for and when to leave . 

by his 23rd birthday then his family were done with him but nick was rich , kicking it in ridiculous style in his big house with his pets and friends and money . he was drafted into a popular team in the nfl and became the focus of even more media attention for his rags to riches story lie . 

now nick has been kicked out of the nfl after being injured when caught in a huge scandal in a drugs bust in a brothel that got leaked to the media . on top of that , he was found to have been having an affair with his agents wife so under new management , he has been told that he needs to get clean and act in a teen show to earn back the public favour before he recovers and re-enters the game . 

he landed a big role but he thinks that acting is a fake career and has zero respect for his co -stars . 

he’s also surrounded by many women he wronged due to his tastes for flighty actresses who he dumped on whatever whim came next.

basically he’s a terrible person and none of his views reflect my own . thank you <3 

[scmantic]

@santastarthq location: outside inherited escapes

al's not generally an overly generous person, so standing outside of inherited escapes, trying to offload an extra coffee feels particularly mortifying. the first drip coffee she was given had a dash of whole milk instead of oat in it and her lactose intolerant ass could not handle that, but, of course, they let her keep the extra mistake drink once they gave the correct order. so now, here they are, trying to get rid of it, "you look like you need a large coffee with milk, amirite? free to a good home." they hold out the drink, hoping the lucky person frees her of this burden.

[nicklehoy]

did  nick  usually  accept  anything  from  anybody  ?  not  really  .  he  was  not  a  giving  person  and  not  much  of  a  receiver  either  ,  unless  it  was  to  do  with  praise  or  narcissistic  feedback  .  mid  way  through  a  sip  of  his  gleaming  mineral  water  ,  he  pauses  ,  lid  screwing  back  on  .  "  usually  i  don't  accept  gestures  from  strangers  but  what  the  hell  …  it  must  be  the  christmas  spirit  ,  "  hand  out  .

[driftwccds]

open starter for @santastarthq the bike storage room

˗ˏˋ ✦                  ⟶  "  yes,  okay,  i  know  this  looks  bad.  "  in  one  hand,  sef  holds  a  broken  paperclip.  in  the  other,  a  piece  of  paper.  the  door  to  the  bike  storage  room  sits  slightly  ajar,  the  other  end  of  the  broken  paperclip  jammed  into  the  door  handle  lock.  on  a  technicality,  she  is  breaking  and  entering  ;  but  if  she  broke  into  her  own  apartment  because  she  lost  her  keys,  was  that  a  felony  ?  they  live  here,  they  normally  would  have  a  key  to  get  in,  if  not  for  the  fact  they  lost  their  keys.  pemdas  or  whatever.  it  all  cancels  out.  "  i  lost  my  main  set  of  keys  ── "  again,  "  ──  and  to  make  losing  my  keys  a  little  less  drab  and  a  little  more  fun,  i  hid  my  spare  set  with  a  treasure  map.   the  thing  is  i  don't  remember  the  end  of  the  treasure  map  and  i  needed  my  keys  to  get  into  the  bike  room  to  get  to  the  next  clue  to  find  my  spare  set.  "  it's  a  very  convoluted  story.  sef  doesn't  seem  to  notice.  "  so  if  we  could  just  keep  this  between  us  and  NOT  tell  management  about  it...  that'd  be  great.  i’d  totally  owe  you  one.  " 

[nicklehoy]

nick  wasn't  the  devil  although  at  times  it  could  get  close  ,  lines  blurred  .  unexpectedly  ,  he  loved  the  holiday  season  .  for  someone  who  seemed  to  berate  others  as  a  hobby  and  rain  down  misery  everywhere  he  went  (  although  his  new  neighbours  were  yet  to  discover  this  )  ,  he  knew  how  to  get  festive  .  "  keep  a  big  secret  ,  between  us  ?  it  seems  like  i  need  some  more  motivation  for  that  …  it  would  be  unfortunate  if  everyone  started  to  think  you  were  the  notorious  chocolate  thief  ,  "  voice  edged  with  humour  .  you  could  never  tell  which  side  of  him  you  were  on  but  it  was  certain  that  nick  would  use  any  opportunity  for  entertainment  .  he  cared  little  about  the  chocolate  thief  …  or  anything  else  as  long  as  it  wasn't  somebody  messing  up  his  in  home  systems  .

[hntedhouse]

saffron glances down at the purple jacket in her hand after nick picks it out. she tosses aside her late 90s, buffyesque black leather duster, slinging it over the top of her sofa as all of her attention falls to the purple velvet blazer. "red is my color," she agrees easily despite finally pulling on a jacket of an entirely different color. "but if i wore it all time ... it's like jennifer lopez and the versace gown that she wore to the 2000 grammys," saff explains, reaching for her black baguette shoulder bag, "it was iconic the first time she wore it, but then she kept re - wearing it and eventually no one was impressed anymore."

[nicklehoy]

did  nick  believe  for  a  second  that  something  truly  amazing  got  old  ?  absolutely  not  .  despite  his  superficial  nature  ,  he  was  a  strong  believer  in  the  idea  that  some  things  were  timeless  …  including  beauty  .  the  few  women  that  he  had  ever  idolised  …  respected  …  he  knew  there  was  nothing  about  them  that  would  do  anything  but  get  finer  with  age  .  a  strange  complex  if  you  considered  his  unusual  ability  to  attribute  absolutely  no  value  to  almost  anyone  except  for  himself  ,  "  the  right  people  will  always  be  impressed  .  it's  called  taste  ,  "  as  he  finishes  ,  standing  up  to  grab  his  own  jacket  ,  a  moment  of  contemplation  .  "  are  you  ready  ?  i'm  starting  to  get  bored  ,  "  comes  across  as  a  joke  but  there's  an  obvious  hint  of  truth  in  it  if  you  look  closely  at  his  charming  smile  .

[foolishs]

𐀔⠀⠀’⠀⠀𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐒   —   open. 𐀔⠀⠀’⠀⠀𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍   —   rooftop  mixer.

                       marisol   stood   in   the   background  ,   barely   sipped   drink   swirled   in   𝑚𝑎𝑛𝑖𝑐𝑢𝑟𝑒𝑑 𝘩𝑎𝑛𝑑   every   so   often   .      they   weren't   comfortable   enough   asserting   themself   in   the   crowd   just   yet   and   found   themself   watching   instead  ,   trying   to   get   a   good   idea   of   everything   first   to   figure   out   how   they   should   best   behave  ,   worried   about   giving   the   wrong   impression   or   starting   off   on   the   wrong   foot  ;   marisol   was   CURSED   with   a   need   to   be   liked   .      it   didn't   help   that   sol   didn't   fully   understand   the   games   taking   place   and   had   managed   to   miss   some   instructions   by   being   so   far   back   .      they   leaned   over   to   (   𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑   𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄   )   and  ,   with   a   rather   hushed   voice  ,   they   pondered   aloud   in   hopes   of   some   answer   .     “    do   you   know   how   to   play   this   ?      my   knowledge   of   party   games   sort   of   is   limited   to   truth   or   dare   and   i'd   rather   not   revist   that   after   the   unfortunate   altercation   my   big   toe   had   one   time      .  .  .    ”       they   shiver   just   at   the   memory  ;   one   thing   had   absolutely   NOT   been   awoken   in   them   that   night   . — @santastarthq

[nicklehoy]

he  took  enjoyment  from  social  occasions  ,  the  perfect  opportunity  to  observe  people  and  figure  out  what  would  give  him  the  most  enjoyment  for  an  evening  or  two  .  he  was  insatiable  .  all  the  best  people  are  .  there  was  never  anything  somebody  could  do  that  would  be  enough  for  him  ,  an  impossible  standard  set  by  ego  that  even  he  ,  himself  ,  could  never  meet  because  there  was  always  something  else  that  he  must  pursue  ,  a  new  game  to  play  .  if  people  understood  how  bored  nick  could  get  then  they  might  not  have  been  surprised  that  his  many  issues  had  developed  .  when  you  barely  felt  anything  then  you  would  light  any  spark  to  discover  what  would  happen  when  it  reached  the  full  throttle  flame  .  dark  eyes  skimming  over  company  ,  soft  spoken  words  causing  attention  to  shift  and  recognition  of  familiarity  .  mannerisms  remind  him  of  another  unnamed  figure  that  he  hasn't  seen  in  quite  some  time  ,  "  you  could  play  a  different  game  with  me  ,  "  deep  as  grin  grows  to  sparkling  point  ,  dazzling  light  in  those  eyes  but  no  sign  of  flirtation  .

[bburich]

MICHAEL EVANS BEHLING @ Giorgio Armani

[ofjessie]

               as  much  as  jessie  did  believe  that  he  was  the  most  memorable  person  in  the  world  and  that  he  was  important  enough  that  someone  would  get  so  obsessed  with  him  ,  they'd  follow  him  all  around  the  country  . . .  or  at  the  very  least  ,  that's  the  perception  he  𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐃  himself  to  have  .  the  part  he  allowed  himself  to  play  and  fully  invest  himself  in  . . .  he  knew  nick  didn't  care  enough  about  𝐀𝐍𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆  for  anything  that  he  was  saying  to  be  the  truth  .  the  worst  part  about  nick  was  that  he  cared  just  as  much  about  things  as  jessie  did  but  times  that  by  ten  . . .  which  was  ,          (     not  at  all  .     )          nick  didn't  give  a  single  shit  about  most  everything  .  it  was  one  of  the  many  reason  jessie  couldn't  stand  the  guy  .  usually  ,  he  had  that  as  his  own  personal  superpower  against  people  .  not  letting  himself  care  ,  unaffected  by  everything  .  able  to  cause  𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐎𝐒  around  him  without  any  feelings  or  thoughts  about  it  . . .  but  nick  . . .  nick  was  another  level  and  jessie  hated  it  .  deep  down  ,  there  were  things  jessie  did  care  about  .  meanwhile  ,  it  𝐒𝐄𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐃  there  was  nothing  nick  cared  about  .  nothing  for  jessie  to  latch  onto  and  drag  into  the  dirt  . . .  in  a  way  ,  that  in  itself  felt  like  a  personal  attack  towards  the  brunette  .         ❛      thought  so  ,     ❜         he  commented  ,  leaving  it  at  that  before  his  eyes  narrowed  as  he  looked  at  the  ex  football  player  .         ❛      really  ,  what're  you  doing  here  ?  i  don't  believe  for  a  second  you  came  here  and  found  god  or  whatever  shit  you're  trying  to  make  people  believe  now  .     ❜          as  much  as  jessie  wanted  an  answer  to  why  nick  was  there  and  why  he  was  being  tormented  with  his  presence  . . .  he  very  well  could've  been  there  for  no  reason  other  than  ,  why  not  ?  but  in  jessie's  eyes  ,  it  𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐍'𝐓  a  good  enough  answer  .

[nicklehoy]

the  devil  may  care  ,  but  nick  lehoy  didn't  .  his  intelligence  had  equipped  him  with  a  lifetime  of  skills  ,  a  fascination  for  the  mundane  prospect  of  understand  what  other  people  wanted  initially  but  later  ,  just  for  how  he  could  exploit  that  .  it  was  scarier  if  he  was  interested  in  you  than  if  he  wasn't  ,  being  left  on  the  wayside  by  him  most  probably  a  blessing  .  those  that  he  seemed  to  become  entangled  with  were  always  left  scorned  ,  left  behind  with  a  tale  to  tell  about  just  how  cruel  he  could  but  but  nick  was  confident  that  he  was  always  honest  about  his  violent  intentions  .  his  deception  was  only  in  the  form  of  people  not  wanting  to  see  what  was  really  there  until  it  was  far  too  late  …  someone  like  him  functioning  in  a  world  that  did  not  seem  to  have  any  point  because  everyone  was  directionless  .  still  ,  it  interested  watching  people  run  around  themselves  in  circles  and  never  learning  from  their  mistakes  ,  a  thrill  that  he  got  from  drama  and  chaos  for  a  few  moments  that  he  had  only  ever  otherwise  got  from  narcotics  ,  sex  and  sports  (  which  apparently  ,  weren't  good  for  him  )  .  despite  his  clear  disinterest  in  jessie  besides  the  orange  juice  and  finding  new  ways  to  irritate  him  ,  nick  seems  to  perk  up  at  the  question  ,  quite  keen  on  the  idea  that  jessie  thinks  he  has  sussed  something  out  about  his  new  masterplan  .  "  you  don't  believe  it  ?  you  really  are  smarter  than  everyone  gives  you  credit  for  ,  "  said  with  a  clear  undertone  of  condesention  that  was  aimed  directly  at  him  ,  twinkle  in  dark  eyes  that  almost  looked  black  if  you  stared  for  too  long  when  he  adds  ,  "  why  are  you  here  ?  i'm  sure  it's  not  because  you  wanted  a  nice  chilean  life  ,  "  he  peers  ,  tin  chilted  and  grin  growing  .  at  the  core  ,  he  was  all  about  knowledge  ,  all  about  understanding  what  could  control  others  and  he  had  figure  doubt  it  wasn't  hard  to  control  jessie  .  a  few  of  the  right  words  ,  finger  on  the  right  pulse  and  …  boom  .  that  was  why  he  decided  to  suggest  ,  "  how  about  a  deal  ?  if  you  tell  me  why  you're  here  then  i'll  leave  you  in  peace  for  the  rest  of  this  little  crossroads  and  tell  you  why  i'm  here  …  but  ,  if  you're  not  honest  …  well  ,  i've  never  liked  that  ,  jessie  .  "

[hntedhouse]

open starter / @santastarthq time / 7:30 pm ( fashionably late ) location / saff's living room

saffron is certain that pulling her hair into an updo and throwing a lightweight jacket on over the same clothes that she wore to walk around the vendor's market during the day would transform her outfit into the perfect casual evening look for attending the rooftop mixer. "okay, so : black leather for a monochromatic look ... " she whirls around with one hanger in each hand, hoisting the black jacket in front of her body. " ... or purple velvet for a pop of color ? " saff lifts up the other jacket for a moment. neither one is truly necessary for the weather, but she's decided that at least one of them is absolutely necessary in order for her outfit to be complete.

[nicklehoy]

nick  wasn't  really  sure  why  he  was  there  ,  this  whole  new  persona  as  a  decent  human  being  seeming  like  a  fairly  draining  play  long  term  .  still  ,  he  was  finding  it  entertaining  making  a  new  spiderweb  of  connections  in  his  new  home  …  no  one  knowing  the  nature  of  his  real  behaviour  yet  .  eating  some  chips  that  he  had  brought  with  him  on  his  walk  over  ,  he  pretended  to  pay  attention  and  be  deep  in  thought  over  the  unremarkable  question  .    (    not  a  reflection  of  the  person  talking  to  him  but  his  lack  of  interest  in  anything  that  wasn't  offering  him  a  thrill  of  entertainment    )    .    "  purple  .  although  …  i'm  really  envisioning  red  as  your  colour  ,  "  not  untrue  .

[divinctionsarchived-deactivated]

⸻ ✿ status / open , @santastarthq . ⸻ ✿ location / playa reñaca vender market .

               a   connoisseur   of   creepy,   luna's   peckish   fingers   and   lively   eyes   gravitated   towards   the   '   casa   de   lo   macabro   '   stall   as   though   they'd   been   there   before.   it   had   only   been   five   minutes   and   her   arms   had   already   begun   to   fill   up   with   crystals,   herbs,   pressed   flowers,   and   ceramic   figures   to   adorn   their   shared   apartment   with   her   twin.   her   hands   were   moving   so   quickly   it   was   hard   to   believe   they   were   taking   in   any   of   the   products   they   planned   on   purchasing.   but   when   she   comes   across   a   decrepit   and   molting   figurine   standing   in   front   of   a   cave,   jewels   dangling   from   its   claws   primed   with   an   essence   of   blood,   luna   stopped   in   their   tracks. ❝ oh   my   god.   ❞   there's   little   regard   for   the   person   next   to   them   as   they   shove   the   products   they   were   just   holding   into   the   other's   chest   before   delicately   picking   up   the   intricately   crafted   ceramic.   ❝   do   you   know   this   myth   ?   ❞   there's   a   shift   in   her   pitch   as   the   excitement   builds.   ❝   according   to   legend   there's   long   lost   treasure   buried   in   laguna   verde   cave,   but   it's   guarded   by   a   creature...⸻   ❞   they   held   the   figure   up   closer   to   the   other   so   they   could   get   a   better   look.   ❝   ⸻   not   quite   goat,   not   quite   man,   not   quite   demon...   but   it's   been   said   has   locked   the   treasure   behind   an   enchantment   on   a   young   girl.   free   the   girl,   find   the   treasure,   but   not   without   grave   and   dire   consequence   like   him   ripping   your   heart   out   of   your   chest   before   you   can   blink.   talk   about   a   blood   diamond.   ❞   even   in   sharing   a   tale   as   horrific   as   that   one,   she   still   looks   over   their   shoulder   to   the   other   with   a   bright   smile   and   bright   eyes.   ❝   isn't   that   cool   ?   ❞

[nicklehoy]

on  the  contrary  ,  the  creepiest  thing  about  nick  was  his  personality  if  you  dared  to  look  closely  enough  .  he  could  dress  it  up  ,  adapt  to  his  environment  like  a  reptile  but  there  was  something  eerie  about  him  if  you  managed  to  catch  a  glimpse  of  what  was  really  underneath  .  he  leans  without  so  much  as  a  thought  about  the  contents  of  her  words  ,  explanation  offered  about  urban  legend  or  rather  mythology  .  intelligent  by  nature  ,  he  hardly  believes  in  things  like  that  anything  that  didn't  seem  like  reality  was  often  perceived  as  pointless  .  fairtyale  and  folklore  alike  was  just  for  those  with  feeble  minds  who  realised  that  they  would  never  achieve  any  real  dreams  and  so  comforted  themselves  in  the  solace  of  these  imagined  realms  .  "  the  myth  is  that  men  have  to  fight  a  demonic  goat  man  for  this  one  fair  maiden  ?  "  he  asks  ,  not  fazed  at  all  and  only  lured  into  the  conversation  because  he  had  nothing  better  to  do  .  he  didn't  think  it  was  cool  .  he  couldn't  imagine  a  world  where  any  woman  would  be  worth  that  …  especially  if  the  mission  seemed  to  have  no  positive  outcomes  .  "  that's  why  she's  still  in  there  ,  then  .  no  offence  but  i  don't  see  a  queue  of  men  wanting  to  face  a  demonic  goat  man  for  some  chick  that  he's  never  even  laid  eyes  on  ,  "  he  laughs  then  and  picks  up  another  random  ornament  ,  not  caring  for  the  backstory  .  he  was  a  man  of  culture  when  it  came  to  some  things  but  this  was  not  one  of  them  .  although  …  one  of  these  demonic  looking  things  would  go  perfectly  with  his  charcoal  home  aesthetic  .

[ofjessie]

' ⏤ 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 ╱ jessie + nick . ' ⏤ 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐠 ╱ @nicklehoy .

            the  fact  that  nick  ended  up  in  chile  as  well  . . .  was  enough  to  drive  jessie  absolutely  mad  . . .  which  was  𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆  on  multiple  levels  .  for  one  ,  he  was  already  mad  .  and  second  ,  there  weren't  many  people  that  could  actually  have  any  real  affect  on  jessie  .  simply  because  he  didn't  let  himself  stop  and  care  for  long  enough  .  he  didn't  stop  to  let  himself  have  any  real  connection  to  𝐀𝐍𝐘𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆  .  therefore  ,  there  was  𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆  that  could  ever  be  used  against  him  ,  hurt  him  or  affect  him  .  it's  how  he'd  always  tried  to  be  ,  how  he  forced  himself  to  be  ,  taught  himself  to  be  .          (      an  easier  way  to  get  through  the  day  to  day  .     )         but  nick  . . .  the  guy  made  jessie  want  to  fling  himself  into  the  sun  .  probably  because  in  some  ways  . . .  frustratingly  enough  . . .  they  had  some  things  in  common  .  except  nick  as  turned  up  to  eleven  .  jessie  had  no  advantage  or  control  .  he  had  𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆  to  hold  over  nick's  head  because  nick  cared  even  less  than  him  .  and  that  . . .  that  drove  the  male  insane  .         ❛     are  you  stalking  me  or  some  shit  ?  why  are  you  even  here  ?     

[nicklehoy]

it  was  ironic  that  somehow  they  ended  up  in  the  same  hemisphere  because  while  nick  found  it  entertaining  messing  with  jessie  ,  he  was  relatively  unmemorable  to  him  .  nick  didn't  care  about  anyone  enough  to  follow  them  anywhere    (    okay  ,  maybe  there  was  one  person  )  ,  never  mind  all  the  way  to  chile  just  to  play  some  kind  of  long  term  mind  game  .  no  ,  it  was  more  than  when  jessie  appeared  then  nick  was  aware  he  could  get  his  vengeance  over  his  orange  juice  .  that  was  all  .  "  yes  .  you're  actually  right  …  i  followed  you  all  the  way  here  because  i'm  so  obsessed  with  you  .  i  actualised  my  long  term  life  goal  :  following  you  around  because  you  are  just  that  important  to  not  just  me  but  the  entire  universe  .  "

[dailypaddys]

[pathologising]

if YOU die because I poisoned you...how is that MY fault like I'm sorry you aren't immune to my poisons I think that's genuinely something you need to work on. Fix yourself before blaming others.

[meanplastic]

[nicklehoy]

[devotedlydelightfuldragon]

[nicklehoy]

[opclites]

stacey had her fair share of past lovers and failed relationships . and while most were tolerable ( having found she actually enjoys a petty back and forth of wits ) ... nick , one the other hand , was deemed completely insufferable . everything about the male made her itch with irritation , from the ego to the smugness that his whole aura radiated . and while it would be easy to become offended at an ever so blatant , back handed compliment , stacey refused to give such satisfactions . " yeah ? funny that , how people thrive when they rid themselves of the toxicity holding them back in life " sardonic smile stretches across lips , " but never mind me . look at you , mr big shot hollywood actor . you must be so proud of yourself ... "

[nicklehoy]

nick  had  never  cared  for  acting  ,  his  success  only  made  him  feel  more  god  like  when  he  knew  that  it  seemed  to  be  about  beauty  rather  than  talent  .  he  believed  most  in  the  industry  to  be  talentless  and  every  second  he  spent  acting  was  just  a  way  to  improve  his  reputation  to  be  allowed  back  into  the  nfl  (  his  one  true  passion  )  .  instead  of  causing  upset  ,  he  became  further  enthused  that  she  cared  enough  to  try  and  trigger  him  over  a  perceived  weakness  ,  "  oh  ,  i  am  …  it  just  shows  how  fantastic  i  am  .  i'm  surrounded  by  the  talentless  wrecks  of  the  world  and  somehow  i  make  them  look  good  …  "  he  claims  ,  truthful  in  his  indifference  .  "  i  suppose  i  have  you  to  thank  …  if  i  hadn't  cheated  on  you  and  done  blow  with  all  those  hookers  then  the  paparazzi  never  would  have  exposed  me  all  over  the  media  and  i  wouldn't  have  had  this  amazing  opportunity  to  show  off  my  acting  skills  ,  "  even  if  he  didn't  think  so  maybe  nick  had  been  born  for  the  stage  .