despite the mere sound of the piano having startled her earlier, jude barely flinched when she felt the touch on her shoulder. before he’d even said anything, she’d figured out by touch alone who it was that had just joined her, and sure enough, the familiar timbre of his voice followed shortly. “ i don’t think that’s how it goes either, ” she relented with a soft smile, turning to face him and then regretting it almost immediately when she found his face mere inches from hers. for a moment it felt like the scene that occured in her bedroom was playing out all over again, but then he spoke again and jude was knocked out of her reverie and back into the present. “ yeah, go for it, ” she encouraged, even shifting closer to the edge of the bench and patting the space next to her, a clear invitation for him to join her.
for a moment, she’d thought about letting him reach over her to play the piano, enjoying the warmth of his presence against her back and the thought of his arms on either side of her, even if it wasn’t quite an embrace. but jude refused to let herself go down that slippery slope again, not after she’d barely managed to hold on before. the faint scent of mason’s cologne on nicolas was a stark reminder of the reality of their situation, of the choice that nicolas had made –– even before she’d come into the picture, so who was she to try and make him choose differently? it was a new day, and with the rising sun came a new perspective; something in her still ached for what could have been, but more than that she feared that she’d lose him completely if she gave into her selfish desires. they were friends, and that was going to have to be enough.
strangely enough, nicolas hadn’t minded the close proximity that the two of them were in at all. perhaps it was because only a few days ago they’d fallen asleep on the same bed, and all he knew is when he woke up that day a few hours later, he felt connected to jude in a way that he’d never quite considered before. and while jude clearly wasn’t the first person to crowd his thoughts in this way, this time, instead of making him worry and fret, this beautiful brunette brought clarity to his thoughts. in moments like this when he was stuck in his head, trying not to listen to his heart and getting even more confused and frustrated when he did, she really was his light at the end of the tunnel, and in so many more ways than just one.
that left just one question: what did he stand to lose, if he wasn’t careful enough? how many hearts would he have to bear the guilt of breaking if he made just a small misstep? if he actually went and followed his heart through all of this?
so instead, he smiled and slid onto the piano seat next to jude, his fingers running up and down the keyboard to try and get himself to remember the notes exactly. it took a few moments of silent tapping against the keys and trying to pedal with his left foot instead of his right, but once he felt confident enough of what he was doing, he let muscle memory take over, and began playing. while anybody else might’ve thought he was playing perfectly fine, he winced when he could practically hear his own rustiness - he had barely any control over his touch. the first section came to him easily, after all, you couldn’t exactly forget that part, but once the trills and running scales came, he scrambled to remember the exact fingering, and fumbled when his mind pulled a blank. he laughed at himself, and stopped abruptly. “afraid that’s all i can remember,” he murmured sheepishly, accompanied with a small shrug. “i haven’t played in years... -seven, to be exact.”
