I Smell like beef

I’m just a 90s girl trying to get Bruce Campbell’s attention. My face was the blueprint for your favorite character in ST4 💋MINORS DNI 🔞

[mewnbuns]

your legs wrapped around his waist and your arms around his shoulders while he carries you around in the pool, chatting quietly between little kisses beneath the sun

[nighthaunting]

thought too hard about MRI machines today and had this come to me in a vision

[beesmygod]

mri accident is literally one of my biggest anxiety freakouts. i dont care about being in the tiny loud tube, im so scared of a secret piece of metal i dont know about in my body will tear through me like a knife through butter. what if i ate a quarter in my sleep

[neutral-wizard]

Quarters George who eats a $10 roll of quarters every night is shredded into a fine mist my the MRI

[its-grape-juice-i-swear]

TIME TO POST ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAVORITE IMAGES!!!!

Back when I worked at the hospital, I had to take MRI training and it was my favorite thing every time. It was only like 10 minutes long and went a little something like this:

Hey. The MRI is basically a really big magnet and by basically I mean it is and we literally never turn it off. It's like really big. Really really big and powerful and The Magnet is always on. We don't turn it off Ever, for any reason. We mean it bro, The Magnet is literally always on. It's crazy strong and will definitely kill you. So don't bring any metal into the MRI room, man. You will fuck up the machine (because The Magnet is always on) and then you will die (again, because The Magnet is always on). Here's some fun questions for you to test your understanding!

1) The ______ is always on.

2) The Magnet is ______ on.

3) How often is The Magnet on?

4) The Magnet is always __.

5) The Magnet is always on. T/F

6) The Magnet is usually on but we know to turn it off for you because you're a very special boy :) T/F

7) My weak fleshy body can survive the wrath of The Magnet. T/F

8) Look at this 500 lbs steel hospital bed, which The Magnet has crumpled into an origami crane. Imagine if that was you.

9) Is The Magnet ever off?

10) Sometimes we turn The Magnet off. T/F

Thank you for taking MRI training. We hope you learned that The Magnet is always on, because it is. It's on Right Now and it will be on every time you come to the MRI. Have fun and remember: The Magnet is always on!

I love you MRI training. The Magnet is always on.

[nightofthelivingmeme]

Insane lore about me:

After every band set while breaking down however much of the kit I need to, I quietly sing all of Glinda’s solos for No One Mourns The Wicked and Thank Goodness - just to make sure they’re still there after a chest heavy set

I also chicken out of telling my husband anything romantically important at least 3 times before actually doing it and we’ve reached the minimum so like, let’s go bitch.

[nightofthelivingmeme]

Not normally one to post about my individual sexy times but this was the first time I’ve been alone in 3 week and I crunched numbers and bit the bullet and bought a month on quinn (yes for Shawn Hatosy I don’t want to hear it) as a “hooray you made it to 33” gift and uhhhh

UHHH

THIS MADE ME FEEL THINGS

DO I HAVE TO WRITE A LIST OF THINGS TO SAY DURING SEX AS A GUIDE TO ACTUALLY GETTING ME TO ASTRAL PROJECT.

Holy shit I thought I didn’t like hearing audio porn.

[nightofthelivingmeme]

I have such a weird curse of over reactive feelings because I’m a full ass adult I should not be talking myself down from being meltdown levels of upset that we watched a different movie than what I suggested (which is also one on our to watch list so we still accomplished the thing) because that one wasn’t on the app and idk why we didn’t check the others because it was on a different app so we could’ve watched the one I originally planned on.

[podcastwizard]

LIKES TO CHARGE REBLOGS TO CAST

[the-goddess-of-annoying]

you people aren't CASTING

[the-goddess-of-annoying]

NO

[chrisflemingfleming]

Boston shows this weekend https://www.ticketmaster.com/chris-fleming-boston-massachusetts-07-10-2026/event/01006496E1A8323D?refArtist=K8vZ9174xm7&f_simplified_filter=true&f_enable_merch_slot=true

[ijustthinkevilunoisneat]

I try to stay away from it all, it's personal but the way some people especially when this first was revealed that Jeff and Karen are together, reacted was so sexist. Sometimes shit happens in marriages which leads to divorce. Kurt was a mess of a human being at the time, he has spoken about it previously, no it wasn't Karen's responsibility to put up with that. She protected herself and her children as best as she can, it wasn't her responsibility to fix Kurt, especially when Kurt didn't want to be fixed. It's less so these days but even when the trailer came out for Dark Side of the Ring, there was still bullshit in the comment section.

[shadoedseptmbr]

Just think, for the rest of our lives we could lean over to the maga relative and/or neighbors and say "isn't it nice that we have fireworks commemorating him keeling over on that stage. So festive"

[randomactsofpigeon]

like to charge, reblog to cast

[nightofthelivingmeme]

Got to the point in deep dive of my lore to my therapist about how my best friend of 10 years got raided by the FBI a week before thanksgiving because it turns out he was a pedophile and it was BAD (as was how it all came tumbling out in full but like that is a whole ass tale) and I broke her. She let me out and awkwardly said “well… thanks for ruining my life I guess.” This is the relationship we have it’s ok.

She had 4 sessions after me telling her about a 28 year old man scheduling time with an infant.

Sorry I just ruined your life too

[4aerie]

july is going to feel like this

[rayasromances]

who wants to be a goddess and let me use their quinn account so i can listen to yes chef?? i’ll wait till ur all done so i don’t mess up ur progress and i’ll delete it when im done🙏🥺

[nightofthelivingmeme]

guys, I can't even lie a hoe is curious and trying to be pragmatic for house buying like truly this would be a great birthday present

I have 2 dead cousins and no dad take pity on me

[nightofthelivingmeme]

Very seriously looking at buying a house in RI and I've never lived anywhere permanently other than my hometown (I did have an apartment in Boston for school but I could literally come home every weekend)

I am absolutely freaking and I don't know what I'm doing because I barely go out and do anything social in my hometown where I know plenty of people and things.

Also I have friends around now and friends down in PVD but I'm always bad at reaching out or trying to plan things so like, is leaving my security blanket going to be good for my anxiety and sociability or make it worse

Also I feel bad about leaving my friends behind

but is leaving the area where all the worst points of my life happened good for me?

IDK what the fuck I'm going to do for a job; I have to leave my students behind and if they don't want to be permanently online then I just lose them which I get but I feel bad.

I've had 2 of the same girls for 8 years and my newer baby is so comforted being here and I feel so bad to leave that

but also when I first think of moving and all of the terror hasn't set in I am excited.

We're cooked fam

[nightofthelivingmeme]

OH and while we’re at aging gracefully

- Judy Greer doing insurance commercials brought back my dormant Judy Greer boner

But it’s worse now because she just keeps getting HOTTER

Move aside main characters give me this quirky supporting act

[wesandresons]

[illinicoise]

“But if you forget to reblog Madame Zeroni, you and your family will be cursed for always and eternity.”

[spn-fandom-breathing-heavily]

not even risking that shit

[codyslipring-deactivated2015060]

scrolled past this, re-evaluated my life, then SCROOOLLLED back up and hit the damn reblog button. 

[tumblgang]

She ain’t no games in real life so I take her serious all the time

Anyone with a name that starts with a “Z”, ends with an “i”, and isn’t some kind of Italian pasta, IS SERIOUS

I’m not climbing no mountain with a pig on my back, 🙅🏽🙅🏾🙅🏿 Negative.

[skuubasally]

Nope. I know better, have your reblog Madame Zeroni.

[luckytaters]

who the fuck is Madame Zeroni

[saudadesinfinitas-deactivated20]

Look at these stupid children who don’t know who Madame Zeroni is

[drayaintshit-deactivated2019030]

☝🏾😂

[callmedeku24]

Man lissen if you don’t know you better ask somebody AFTER you hit the reblog button

[emeraldmercury]

Idk who she is but I have an exam today so I’ll reblog her

[haiku-robot]

idk who she is but i have an exam today so i’ll reblog her

^Haiku^bot^0.4. Sometimes I do stupid things (but I have improved with syllables!). Beep-boop!

[jacobmick]

Because wise, I am.

[seymonecristina]

Oh fucks no she’s back lmao must reblog. I’m sorry guys

[silverslipstream]

Reblogging Madame Zeroni because I would hate for my great-great grandson to get hit in the head by running shoes

[nightofthelivingmeme]

My cousin died and I find out the details of his service via public facebook post and like

This is the 2nd child my aunt has buried, trying to have grace through the annoyance of like "well fuck me then, right?"

Texted my mom about it and she asked me how I found that information so oh you also didn't tell your sister-in-law SEPARATED FROM YOU BY A WALL?

Guys my family is absolutely cooked.

BUT on the plus side I did just get to text my therapist a gif of Oprah with a forewarning that once again the moment we have an emotionally calm moment to really focus on past trauma? Boom catastrophe.