Don't let your memes be dreams @nightshadereaper - Tumblr Blog

"Consensual, but still weird" is underrated in toxic freaky shipping world. There are many ways you can make it weird while still having everyone agree to it

tlirsgender

They consented but at what cost

what-even-is-thiss

What would a Yankee Candle go for in ancient Greece?

tbh the most confusing thing about it to them would probably be the glass that the candle is contained in. They might try to buy information about glass from you.

what-even-is-thiss

Yeah basically

what-even-is-thiss

Yeah I should’ve clarified (pun intended). They had glass in the ancient world especially in Rome and Egypt but it was basically super heated sand and color additives put in a mold and often looked opaque and kinda lumpy. Even if it was blown like it was in some regions it wouldn’t have looked like modern glass.

Clear blown glass like you’d see a modern scented candle contained in wasn’t invented until the late Middle Ages and certainly wasn’t mass produced until the 1500s and even then places like Venice that had knowledge of these techniques literally forbid their glassmakers from leaving their city or region so other people couldn’t make it, forcing artificial scarcity and making it a very expensive material.

So if you showed a yankee candle to an Ancient Greek, especially one from a city or something, they’d be like burning scented wax okay not something I’d do but it makes sense. Also how the fuck is that glass transparent.

what-even-is-thiss

Like imagine if someone brought you something weird but understandable contained in a material that they said was made out of wood and you could tell that it’s clearly made out of wood they’re not lying about that but it was also completely transparent and see through with no visible flaws. That’s about the level of weird we’re talking about here.

animnightmare

It isnt flawless, but transparent wood does already exist actually

what-even-is-thiss

What the fuck I feel like a medieval peasant seeing an iPhone

unyieldingsilence

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what-even-is-thiss

Who goes there

lesbx

This is the first and only time this note preview feature has landed. the faint whisper of mike lurking in the shadows

lesbx

I like how this post is still going around long after it’s outlived this entire website feature

tinyyellowflowers-blog

Went to the grocery store with my kindergartener. We weighed some bananas: 2 pounds even. We weighed a watermelon: 4 pounds even. We weighed some mangos: a little over 1 pound. We weighed the watermelon AND the bananas: 6 pounds even.

“That’s funny” said the child “because 2+4=6 and two pounds and four pounds is six pounds. It’s like the same as math!”

“What happens if you add 6+1?”

“SEVEN”

“What if we put one pound of mangos on the scale?” <mangos added>

“IT’S THE SAME!!”

“OK, what’s 7-4?”

“Three?”

“What if we take the four pound watermelon off the scale?” <watermelon removed>

“Mama! Are you telling me math works In Real Life? Think of all the things you could measure!!”

neatlymanifolded

apenitentialprayer

Am walking through Manhattan, there's a woman who can't be more than 25 in a big fur coat, walking with a cane, angrily saying into her headpiece "I want them them destroyed," I feel like an extra in a movie

trans-girl-nausicaa

list of (HIGHLY ETHICAL) USA military jobs where you don’t have to kill anyone:

Public Affairs. Have you ever wanted to make literal government propaganda? Well now you get to.

Emotional Support Animal Handler. The emotional support animal in question is a mutt that one of your Battle Buddies “rescued” from Afghanistan. He named the dog “Kunduz Hospital Airstrike”

Depleted Uranium Munitions Handler

Recruiter Who Specifically Targets Teenagers

Priest Who Tries To Convince Murderers That They Aren’t Going To Hell

Guy who brings Hot Pockets™ to drone operators and fruitlessly discourages them from using the term “Bug Splat”

Guy who keeps the buildings full of munitions from catching on fire. (It’s really really important that those munitions dont explode until they impact an apartment block in the global south)

Guy who stands on the deck of Coast Guard vessels and hollers threats at migrants in the worst Spanish you’ve ever heard

Guy who maintains and repairs multimillion dollar murder machines

Guy Who Trains Guys To Kill Without Hesitation or Remorse

Sex Trafficker (Army)

Sex Trafficker (Navy)

Sex Trafficker (Marines)

tictacpbandai

magicmistral

My uncle is really into warhammer and would win every miniature painting competition he was in. I have not very steady hands and he saw me messing up my nail polish for prom. He sat with me and carefully painted my nails and that moment meant so much to me all these years later.

sabertoothwalrus

it’s hard to give jewelry as gifts sometimes

draconym

I'm at a convention for the game of Go with a friend who is almost 84 years old, and he is constantly being accosted by elementary schoolers who want to play him because every year there is a prize for whoever plays a game with the biggest age difference between players.

So every time I go to look for him, I see this:

derinthescarletpescatarian

Everyone: Agatha Christie's mysteries are generally very surprising

Me reading the Mysterious Affair at Styles: That was probably very true when they were written, but there's a whole genre based on her work now. It's probably more predictable to those of us who have experienced so many derivatives of her work in the hands of other authors.

Me finishing the Mysterious Affair At Styles: Oh hot damn. Those were literally the only candidates I didn't suspect even once in the entire book.

mala-taste

70sscifiart

Taglines from science fiction covers

nedolight

Nether Queen~✨

lydiardbell

I think Tumblr in general would appreciate the newest back-of-bus advertising campaign in Wellington, Aotearoa New Zealand

lydiardbell

So-called "free thinkers" when a bus is traveling between Strathmore Park and Newtown:

noknowshame

I know we’re all like lawless nonconformists but you really can’t be texting and driving. that’s one of the ones you’ve gotta listen to for real

inner-muse

Not even at stoplights!!! I know it’s so so tempting to just glance at your phone when you’re stopped, but there’s actually something called “distraction hangover” where even once you put your phone down, your brain is still processing the interaction and isn’t fully paying attention to the road for up to 30 seconds afterwards. So it’s still really dangerous even if you’re stopped when you look at your phone. If you need to check something on your phone, pull over.

theperksofbeingahugefuckingcunt

this especially applies to people with adhd. you know that symptom you may have heard of called “difficulty transitioning between tasks”? you don’t want piloting a ton or two of potential death to be the task you can’t mentally switch back to.