See what I see

[thenordroom]

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In my future home: The perfect workplace

On my wish list for the future: A neat, simple (yet inspiring) home office. Bright colors for them bright ideas..

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Current interior crush: Kähler

The nordic design is in style like never before. People are slowly but surely opening they're eyes to the 175 year old Danish brand, Kähler. On my Kähler wish list: 

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I have never been a sucker for necklaces, bracelets or rings. As a matter of fact I never even pierced my ears. Until three years ago I never really wore watches either.. But now it's a whole different ball game. Over the last year I have grown very fond of the nordic, simple style, especially when it comes to interior. And also when it comes to the watches that I wear. I am a very simple individual, and wearing a watch more than makes up for the other accessories I don't wear.. Over the last couple of months I've completely fallen in love with the nordic style watches from Triwa. Simple, elegant, beautiful handcrafted material, solid quality, affordable.. What more can anyone ask for?

[dauntingwilderness]

By Gary Jacobson

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Outside my window right now

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IF YOU COULD BE ANYTHING YOU WANTED TO BE..

What would you be? I know what I would have been. Take a look. Is there anything more beautiful and majestic than this animal? Every time I think of these amazing, complex creatures being in captivity, my heart bleeds..

What would you be?

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Before I turn into the Grinch..

Christmas is getting closer by the minute. Where I live, that means a lot of focus on the crazy amounts we spend on gifts, and on the people who dread this holiday because they can't celebrate it "like everyone else". Whatever that means.. In my experience, Christmas celebrations are significantly different from household to household. Under the definition of people who dread Christmas they put homeless people, widowers, poor single parents etc. Especially the ones who can't afford to buy presents draw a lot of attention here. And don't get me wrong, I think it's great that we promote awareness around this, so that wealthier and more resourceful people decide to make a change.

But do you have to be homeless or poor to dread Christmas?

Ever since my friends and family started asking me what my Christmas wishes are, and telling me about how they're trying to get in the Christmas-spirit and how they can't wait and all that, I've been thinking one thing; I don't want to. And the only thing that I'd wish for is the only thing I can't get, ever. You can't have people back when they don't exist anymore. I want to go away and come back when it's all over, and pretend it never happened.

It's not a secret that Christmas make happy people happier and unhappy people unhappier. This is my first holiday in years that I have to spend without my everything. And I realize that none of the happy occasions matter when you can't share it with the one you were meant to share it with. I know what reality is, but it still feels so unreal and unfair. And I can't imagine what Christmas is gonna be like right now. It feels like it'll be a long and painful one. So for the first time ever, I can't stand the thought of any of it. And that it'll be hard watching all the love. Which is why I don't think you have to be homeless or poor to be dreading Christmas. You don't. I know how lucky I am materialistically. I have roof over my head and food on the table, I can afford to buy presents, and the ones closest to me can afford it. But what does it matter? I would rather be poor and not able to buy any gifts if I could have him back, and be with him. After all, isn't that the most important thing about Christmas? Sharing it with the one(s) you love the most?

Truth is, I thought he'd make it longer than he did. I honestly thought that he'd be here right now, which makes it a lot worse. We would have known that this was probably going to be his last Christmas, and we'd make the most of it. Instead, I'm going through all this, and I can't believe that I have to go through my first Christmas without him at this early age… Way too early. I know I have my friends and family, in theory. But I think it's hard to watch them so happy and loving even when it's not Christmas. I think it's hard to watch people around me, especially the ones closest to me, move on so easily, smiling, hugging, laughing and loving, when I feel like this. Not when he was so special..

After New Years Eve, I have promised myself that I will keep trying even harder to get my life in order. The thought of moving on is killing me, but I don't know what else to do. Or to force myself to do. Which is why I will be starting my own kind of Happiness Project. But before that, unfortunately for me, comes Christmas.. Which is why I'll reach out to whoever's out here in this tumblrverse.. Do you have any idea how I can make Christmas go by in the least painful way?

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So… Here we go, guys

I decided to make this tumblr months ago, and here I am. Like everyone else, I have a story. I’ve lived a long life, so I’m not talking about the story of my life, but the story about how I ended up doing this. Earlier this year I lost someone who meant the world to me, to a sudden, serious, deadly disease. That someone who, honestly, meant so much more to me than anyone else in my life ever will. At least that’s what it feels like right now. So things have been bad and dark, and they still are. I’ve found out that I’m not waiting for the day that I get over this. The day my heart grows back together from all the little bits and pieces it broke into. 

They say that time heals all wounds. Well, I don’t really think the wounds ever fully heal. I don’t think we fully recover from this kind of pain. I think it takes time because we have to learn how to live with the pain. And once we figure out how we do that, the pain gets easier to live with. We don’t have other choices. 

I’ve been struggling for almost ten months now. Some days are definitely better than others, and I know that I’m getting better at this. But the pain can still be very strong and devastating. A few months ago I read The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. I knew that reading a book about possible ways to achieve happiness wouldn’t really get me a lot of places, but it would maybe give me an idea about how to start. Because being happy is something that I really, really want to find my way back to. And I will, I hope. So this January, I will hopefully be following the procedure she went through, but in my own way. And this is why I made this blog. To keep record of how things will go when i start my little happiness project. 

I’m also here to share things that I think are beautiful. By that I mean pictures, interior, animals, music, books, movies and funny things. I want to make this a portfolio that I can scroll through. And it doesn’t matter if I get a lot of followers or whatever. I’m doing this for myself, and for my own happiness, that I hope to achieve, and get closer to, in 2015. 

So, that’s me! If you want to tag along for the entertainment or to find inspiration to start your own happiness project or whatever, then you’re of course welcome to tag along. You can also check out Gretchen Rubin herself! If we have common interests, I’ll happily check out your blog! 

Till next time!