ǫᴜɪᴇᴛ ᴏɴᴇ @nusttam - Tumblr Blog

credit / feel free to change pronouns !

‘ tell me about the dream where we the pull bodies out of the lake ’ ‘ it’s more like a song on a policeman’s radio ’ ‘ tell me how all this , and love too , will ruin us ’ ‘ we’ll never get used to it ’ ‘ there are so many things i’m not allowed to tell you ’ ‘ we know where the sound is coming from ’ ‘ the world is no longer mysterious ’ ‘ it’s thinking of stabbing us to death and leaving our bodies in a dumpster ’ ‘ i like him and i want to be like him ’ ‘ someone once told me that explaining is an admission of failure ’ ‘ history repeats itself ’ ‘ i wanted to be wanted ’ ‘ frequently i was finding myself sleepless ’ ‘ i’d like my money’s worth ’ ‘ we can’t punch ourselves awake ’ ‘ sorry about the blood in your mouth ’ ‘ you wanted happiness , i can’t blame you for that ’ ‘ a mouth sounds idiotic when it blathers on about joy ’ ‘ tell me you’re not miserable ’ ‘ imagine being useless ’ ‘ there is no way to make this story interesting ’ ‘ i want to tell you this story without having to confess anything ’ ‘ he told me it wasn’t going to be okay ’ ‘ the minutes don’t stop ’ ‘ every morning another chapter ’ ‘ i wanted to give you something more ’ ‘ i’m sorry i came to your party and seduced you ’ ‘ you want a better story ’ ‘ i can already tell you think i’m the dragon ’ ‘ you still get to be the hero ’ ‘ i take the parts that i remember and stitch them back together ’ ‘ here is the part where everyone was happy all the time and we were all forgiven ’ ‘ the entire history of human desire takes about seventy minutes to tell ’ ‘ unfortunately we don’t have that kind of time ’ ‘ it isn’t over yet , it’s just begun ’ ‘ things happen every minute that have nothing to do with us ’ ‘ i wanted to fall down right there but i knew you wouldn’t catch me ’ ‘ you are a fever i am learning to live with ’ ‘ everything is happening at the wrong end of a very long tunnel ’ ‘ i just don’t want to die anymore ’ ‘ you want to die for love , you always have ’ ‘ let’s not talk about it , let’s just not talk ’ ‘ you say ‘ i’ll give you anything ’ but you never come through ’ ‘ i’m hungry and hollow and just want something to call my own ’ ‘ anything past the horizon is invisible , it can only be imagined ’ ‘ you keep singing along to that song i hate ’ ‘ this is the place where everything starts to begin ’ ‘ monsters are always hungry ’ ‘ none of us are going back ’

#🍃 ❛ it’s wednesday my dudes / memes.

powerhh

day 1 of the @hqfashionweek - hairstyles & accessories

i love my boy matsukawa so much.

also, don’t forget to check out my friend’s piece,, a perfect hanamaki to my matsukawa!!!

#🍃 ❛ what a mischief you would bring young darling / matsukawa issei.#🍃 ❛ at night when the lake is a mirror / aes.

mirseii-deactivated20200416

have this curly haired Hanamaki for day 1 of @hqfashionweek

prompt: hairstyles & accessories

and ppppst check out my friend’s piece, it’s a gorgeous matsukawa!! here

#🍃 ❛ whatever trouble that you’re thinking i could get into it / hanamaki.#!!!!!!!!!!!

chzyshenanigans

Mattsun for @calmgeyama!! Hope you like it!

#🍃 ❛ what a mischief you would bring young darling / matsukawa issei.

cantarellabakery

When in doubt… Just doodle your best boy

#🍃 ❛ what a mischief you would bring young darling / matsukawa issei.

profiterolls‌.

the statement’s sentimentality is immediately vanished into dust, hanamaki could literally shove him off the bed at this very moment and not even feel sorry about it. but the pull in his chest says otherwise, and for once he’s glad that he’s the only one that can feel it. or tell it’s even there. sometimes he thinks he and matsukawa were born from the same star.

“withdrawing the emergency only phone policy is sort of the equivalent, don’t you think?” a question he doesn’t need an answer to. his eyebrow raises, as his index finger unfolds from it’s hold on his legs to point toward mattsun. the corners of his lips twitch upward in a small smile.

hanamaki lets himself fall back onto the bed, his legs splaying to the sides, his left knee knocking against the wall a bit harder than he’d thought given the sound it makes. he sort of finds it hard to believe that he and mattsun didn’t even attend college’s close to each other, even iwaizumi and oikawa were still going to be roommates. there’s a part of him that wonders if he’s the kind of person that can live alone. “i can’t believe you just admitted your love for me mattsun, not one of our friends is going to believe that.”

“ you’re not wrong, ” he concedes easily, jostling himself with a poor excuse for a shrug without lifting his head from his arm. he does raise his extended hand to press the tip of his index finger to hanamaki’s though. phone home, his mind supplies. the edge of his smile softens just as much as it strengthens and his eyes crinkle at the corner for the trouble.

he withdraws only to flop over on his back, stretching all four sleep limbs to the ceiling before sprawling back out, full starfish. not one to fidget, really, he tucks his hands behind his head, not unlike makki had before. with his view of him upside down now it somehow seems easier to be a bit more vocal than usual.

“ actually— i think the running bet is that i would be the first. ” he argues, not quite an admission nor a denial. he thinks, if makki had been paying close enough attention, he would be less inclined to disbelief. “ it is certainly more believable than oikawa confessing to iwaizumi, ”

#hhhhh #🍃 ❛ i. i have a basketball game tomorrow / main.#🍃 ❛ i. featuring / profiterolls.#profiterolls

profiterolls.

he realizes quickly that it was a stupid question to ask in the first place as soon as mattsun asks his own question.

of course he didn’t think they they wouldn’t still keep in touch, just like he’d thought earlier with oikawa, it’s hard for him and mattsun to not communicate in some way. maybe he just needed to hear it straight from the source. his mama did always teach him never to assume anything. but maybe this is different.

makki sits up, wrapping his abnormally long arms around his knees to keep his equally abnormally long legs up, tonight is not the night for an open show. he’d be lying if he said that conversation with oikawa earlier didn’t jar him slightly. after all, he was the sort of glue that brought them all together if the first place and if that glue was worried then what did that mean for the rest of them. on the other hand, he knows the anxieties that oikawa has that he doesn’t voice because makki has a lot of them himself. “sometimes conformation is comfortable.”

an arm extends from where both had been folded under his chin, not quite reaching for makki, only serving to lessen the distance between them currently where he might not be able to later; already providing comfort in the breath before makki asks for it.

there are three people other than his mother that mattsun would ( and plans to ) transcend distance for— but there is only one that he’ll pull out all the stops for. “ i’ll withdrawal my emergency only phone call policy. ” fingers twitch, as if to argue the previous sentiment about reaching. sometimes, matsukawa swears he misses makki before he leaves a room.

“ i could recite some vows, if that would ease your mind. ” the corner of his mouth mocks his fingers with an upward twitch. it’s not an exaggeration by any means; he already believes that death might be the only thing capable of doing them part and even then, he doubts it.

#🍃 ❛ i. i have a basketball game tomorrow / main.#🍃 ❛ i. featuring / profiterolls.#profiterolls

profiterolls.

if oikawa ever heard him right now makki would be mortified.

makki folds his hands behind his head, shoving his feet under the mass of blankets at the bottom of his bed. he’s unsure whether or not the conversation he had with oikawa earlier that day wasn’t totally invalid.

“do you think we’ll still keep in touch when we go to college?” he goes with the keep in touch, because even though he’s gay as the rising sun, and not afraid to experiment with things, he will not come across as a little bitch.” @nusttam

initially, the question strikes him as wrong somehow.

jostled by the movement of his feet, mattsun readjusts his position atop of the pile of blankets and he takes the usual amount of time allotted to ponder over things and then some. these are the kinds of things normal people worry about in regards to starting anew and separating from the people they care about. he remembers, vaguely, his classmates in primary talking about the likes. he remembers, also, thinking then that it was odd to people would make such empty promises.

it kinda of jars to him realize that his opinion had entirely changed; that his sense of wrongness in being asked comes from his own lack of doubt. since they’d met the spaces between their names had refused to exist. they were mattsun-and-makki, said in one breath like a single entity. sure he had thought about the fact that there would be more of it and consequently less time spent in the same vicinity but physical distance had never mattered much in that regard.

his gaze shifts, searching. he answers with a question of his own, “ do you not? ”

#profiterolls #🍃 ❛ i. i have a basketball game tomorrow / main.#🍃 ❛ i. featuring / profiterolls.

ninety percent sweat and ten percent exhaustion, his staff just out of his reach, mattsun’s body refuses to remove itself from the kwoon room floor. hours have passed since they started sparing but he has no idea how many. the only thing he’s kept track of is the win-lose ratio and even that, he’d forgotten after they reached triple digits. he’s not complaining, though.

despite the desperate need for a shower and the exhausted ache of every bone in his skeleton — he feels good. he turns his head to look at his co-pilot, lopsided grin twisting the corner of his mouth upward just on instinct alone. “ you’re want to peel me off the floor and carry me back to the room or should i wait for kaiju here? ” / @profiterolls

#🍃 ❛ ii. the truth is stranger than my own worst dreams / pacific rim.#🍃 ❛ ii. featuring / profiterolls.#🍃 ❛ welcome to chili’s / starter.#profiterolls

by no means should he be lounging casually on a couch on the slytherin common room — but here issei is, one foot proper up on his ankle, an arm thrown over the back of the sofa like he is part of the scenery.

someone eyes his ravenclaw robes disdainfully but doesn’t ask what he’s doing there nor how he managed to get inside. it is probably widely assumed hanamaki told him the password considering this is not the first time he’s wandered in here.

the fact of the matter is that matsukawa is just eerily good at guessing. oikawa bounds down out of the dorm room and cants him a quite unreadable expression as he passes by that issei knows means he’s off to sneak into the astronomy tower and likely that iwaizumi hajime will find him there. he peels himself off the couch to slip into the dorm in his absence, not bothering with greetings or apologies for his intrusiveness as he sprawls himself sideways across the end of makki’s bed, a brow raised. he does however flick his wand over his shoulder at the door and mutter a silencing charm. secret gossip is no fun if everyone can hear it.