Trying to conquer the Beast
I wasnāt sure what to expect going into the North American Spartan Championships in West Virginia August 8th, but I knew it was going to be a big test of my abilities as a female elite OCR racer to see 1) how I stacked up on a national level and 2) how my training prepared me to handle a much longer race than Iām used to... Well, come to find out my training had prepared me... I did not die... lol. And I did pull off a top 25 spot- securing my coin entry into the big Tahoe Spartan World Championships, but it was more of a humbling, learning experience and a fabulous memory of one of the most beautiful race venues Iāve been to.
See I acted like I didnāt have a goal- because I didnāt want to set my sights too high or too low. I knew people close to me were expecting vastly different outcomes and I myself really had no possible idea of āguessingā which pro girls would be there (all of them) or whether or not I could realistically shoot for the Top Ten. There were times I fantasized about Top 3, some fairy tale dark horse story starring me... deep down realistically I knew I probably would not pull that off this year as badly as I wanted to. I did however hope and expect to be somewhere in that top twenty.
I knew I had not trained consistently or long enough the correct way to make this a feesible possibility yet. Next year the skies the limit but I spent the majority of this year racing like a rookie with red lining in the first mile, missing every spear and not eating ever before a race regardless of length. I could go on but letās get back to this specific race.
Leading up to West VA I was coming off a second place Spartan podium in Asheville and could not have been more pleased with all of my efforts finally paying off. With a new manager and better strategy it seemed the puzzle was starting to come together. I was ecstatic but also knew that had just been the warm-up- that the ārealā race and mountain were yet to come...
As far as the āreal raceā went I made a couple rookie mistakes that cost me placement. It started with the Twister. As usual this obstacle that has been my nemesis since the early FL Super 2017. I was thrilled to see when I got there it was only 2 sections and for some reason my confidence soared, as did my panick. I knew I was in the top half of the top twenty - close to the top ten. We were all tight running super close. I watched two women complete it with a swinging technique (I normally go backwards) and decided - in the middle of a championship race- to try a new technique myself. I got 3 handles away and fell
off. I was the ONLY elite female in this group to fail. I counted 8 girls pass me as I did burpees as fast and perfectly as I could . It was heart breaking and thatās when I first mentally broke.
Then shortly after that we got into venue, I was told I was 26th -which was worse than I thought - and I missed my spear in front of my
Coach. Minutes later I get passed by the top men on camera at the top of an excruciatingly steel hill and I know Iām on live feed about to cry. I got into my own head and interestingly enough I switched my mindset from giving up to simply trying to breathe deep and enjoy the race, remembering why I loved this crazy sport. But I had given up on the fire fighting for spots.
When I crossed the finish line I felt relieved, not nessecarily happy but not entirely dissapointed either. Kind of indifferent but glad it was over. Later as placements came out I realized that 24th was actually pretty amazing when you see the 23 before me AND I beat a lot of female racers from the East coast who had been kicking my ass the past two years.
I had improved. Iām not where I want to be yet but I know Iām on the right path. I look forward to the rest of the races this season, some new ones - a stadium sprint is up next for me and a couple Savages as well . Racing is a source of joy and love for me and I can never forget that. Iām trying to turn this love into a very serious success story and not every race is going to be a podium and a happy ending. This race reminded me of that, but at the same time it also reminded me of the sheer beauty of nature and the basic primal love I have of competition and this crazy sport of OCR...
