yipee kayak other buckets

hi im ellie im a professional wrestler

[narrie]

Twitter dying but tumblr is still standing

[blackarachnya]

we need the jermey renner app back now more than ever before

[spicy-vaginal-tacos]

so i went shopping with my girlfriend yesterday and i saw this pair of denim shoes, and seeing as ive been on this god forsaken website for too long, you know what i did? you know what this grown ass 23-year-old did in the middle of a busy store?

[spicy-vaginal-tacos]

i pointed to the god damned shoe and said in real life out loud, “jews” 

[kaijuno]

Also being a scientist pretty much gives you a free pass to be as eccentric as you want like you’ll be at a conference and it’s like “is that guy wearing socks and sandals and plaid pants???” “Ya but he was on the team that discovered gravitational waves let him be”

[fatcowboys]

me: ok time 2 sleep!! my brain on repeat for hours: two Bros chilling in a Hot tub five feet apart cause there Not Gay

[lycoteuthis-deactivated20160131]

so this dude invented “a device” to help shy dudes pee in public restrooms

except it’s literally just a crushed velvet cape with suction cups on the hem

[trailerparkhardcore]

Suction warlock

[dongstomper-deactivated20161230]

don the piss robe

[hitchcomet]

[did-you-know]

[shorm]

[userboxer]

[officialirnbru]

so i went vegan a couple of weeks ago (after watching simon amstell’s film “carnage” highly recommend!!) and i’m trying so hard not to be Vegan™ but it’s so god damn hard because intensive farming is killing this planet and animals 

[heterophobicleia]

every vine compilation ever

- “there’s only one thing worse than a rapist…boom.” “a child?” “NO”

- “i got u frankincense.” “thank you.” “and i brought you myrrh.” “thank you.” “myrr-DUR” *gasp* “judas! nooo…”

- that one video of the girl with the sun glasses dancing to the beginning of take on me

- “this bitch empty…YEET”

- “do you have any ice?” “no i do not, i just have freezable fruit shapes.” “why?” *shakes glass* “just because…”

- the one of the lobster riding a skateboard to a kazoo cover of the final countdown

- “how much money have you got?” “69 cents.” “oh you know what that means!” “…i don’t have enough money for chicken nuggets.”

- any vine of that guy swearing about British traffic 

- the one of the dog dancing to Africa by toto

- “i’m just cooking pizza.” THWACK “I WASN’T READY!”

- “and they were roommates.” “oh my god, they were roommates.”

- the one with the person with the paper bag over their head dancing to the YMCA

- “and i realize, i left the won tons in.” “OHH the won tons.”

- “we got Chuck. we got barney. Barney’s about to meet his maker.” “die commie fucker” “DON’T KILL MY DAD!”

- an obligatory Thomas Sanders vine

[tatooineknights]

Everyone….. I love me a good Star War

[michaelcerasofficial-deactivate]

I’m sorry but kylie jenner just instagrammed a picture of her wearing a dennis reynolds original

[toastbutteregg]

seven billion people on this planet and i have 2 friends

[asapscience]

[faebee-deactivated20190106]

roses are red, tomatoes are sweet, HE BOOTS TOO BIG FOR HE GOT DAMN FEET

[chasemcgill-deactivated20170714]

tumblr drags people for being close-minded and i get it, but at a certain point i’m like damn, stop with the superiority complex and give people a chance to grow, lord knows you didn’t come out of the womb a social justice blogger with a steve rogers obsession

[weirdnessisgood]

[surprisebitch]

this is the future