slither slither mother fucker

OLIVER PYTHONIDAE; your friendly neighborhood snake thing

[ollliverrr]

@troyestory: @oliverncompany U CANT TELL ME THAT WHEN SHE POPPED OUT U DIDNT THINK SHE WAS AN ALIEN

@oliverncompany: @troyestory ok MAYBE at that moment but now she's cute troye ok

[ollliverrr]

@troyestory: @oliverncompany im not mad she just looks like an alIEN

@oliverncompany: @troyestory ur totally maD

[ollliverrr]

@oliverncompany: when u don't even regret ordering everything off of the dollar menu

@oliverncompany: aw yes living the life

[ollliverrr]

@oliverncompany: honestly if troye's mom and my mom weren't here right now helping us, troye and I would probably have killed each other by now

@oliverncompany: leslie's finally asleep which means i can finally go get taco bell

@oliverncompany: the tears are real

[ollliverrr]

@oliverncompany: honestly i'll forever be bitter at @danfrancisco because he's getting to go to disneyland

@oliverncompany: F O R E V E R B I T T E R

[ollliverrr]

@oliverncompany: daniel is such an asshole

@oliverncompany: i haven't slept in days i'm pretty sure

@oliverncompany: did you know babies can cry for hours? yeah.

[ollliverrr]

@oliverncompany: I've been married to troye for a year how gross

[ollliverrr]

@troyestory: leslie looks like a fucking alien

@oliverncompany: @troyestory don't be mad she looks more like mE

[ollliverrr]

@oliverncompany: DAMNNNNNNN DANIEL @danfrancisco

@oliverncompany: still funny 4 years later

[ollliverrr]

@airiiick: @troyestory :/

@airiiick: @troyestory oliver loves me more and now i know why

@airiiick: @troyestory BC YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE

@troyestory: @airiiick :)

@troyestory: @airiiick nahhh im carrying his child

@troyestory: @airiiick he loves me more

@troyestory: @airiiick right @oliverncompany ?

@oliverncompany: @troyestory i'm eating cereal don't drag me into this

[uber-music]

Visit Original Link

[ollliverrr]

uber-music:

Two Door Cinema - Come Back Home

[stydiaislove]

[ollliverrr]

shhhalex:

–look dude, I don’t care about your nose. I don’t have deep fried oreos. The guy who makes them went home for the weekend. You should too. 

Rude. What about deep fried Poptarts? Do you have those?

[ollliverrr]

wtftroye:

Zelda Darrow Pythonidae? I think not.

Christina Darrow Pythonidae? I think yes.

You only want to name her Christina because of Chris Evans. We’re not going to do that, I’m sorry. 

[ollliverrr]

sabrina-rolkins:

Oh––Oh my god.

Stop laughing. I’m gorgeous.

[ollliverrr]

roxy--jones:

––You look like a fuckin’ pig.

I do? Oink, oink.

[ollliverrr]

whatchase:

Fuckin’ kids, man, amiright?

Dude, kids are great. Little evil masterminds, but they’re still great.