I made a joke at therapy and now I’m going home with pamphlets on ✨trauma✨
Xuebing Du
KIROKAZE
taylor price

Janaina Medeiros
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
wallacepolsom

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

blake kathryn

No title available
NASA

⁂

Kiana Khansmith

titsay
Jules of Nature
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

★
cherry valley forever
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
occasionally subtle

#extradirty

seen from Türkiye
seen from Brazil

seen from United States
seen from Brazil

seen from Congo - Kinshasa
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Brazil
seen from United States
seen from China
seen from Brazil
seen from Netherlands
seen from Brazil
seen from United Kingdom

seen from Canada

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from Malaysia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
@omgitsallreal
I made a joke at therapy and now I’m going home with pamphlets on ✨trauma✨
I liked this video
ilya being in a period of Bad depression and between playing games and going to practice he doesn't really have the energy to do much else and he just kind of collapses when he gets home and he hasn't shaved in days and his hair is unruly and he just feels kinda gross and ugly but doesn't have the energy to do anything about it so shane is like Not On My Watch so he drags ilya into the tub and washes his hair with his special curly shampoo and carefully shaves his face and lathers him in too much body lotion which means he has to stand stark naked in the bathroom for 10 minutes before he can put clothes on and shane tries his best to do his curly hair routine for him he gets the special towel and the curl cream and his eyebrows furrow in concentration as he scrunches ilya's curls to the best of his abilities and ilya sits on the toilet lid with tears in his eyes
we need to discuss how in tampa shane hollander went to the pool just to lay on his deck chair and ogle ilya. this is shane hollander we're talking about. in february of a season. he's not even conceivably swimming laps or something he's literally just there to ogle. hedonist
Someone online makes a comment about how Shane probably isn’t a very good boyfriend, saying his flat affect and resting neutral face in paparazzi pics and video must mean he’s detached and not affectionate compared to Ilya who is much more overtly affectionate
Ilya then has the rest of the Centaurs help him make a compilation of secretly filmed Shane moments showing how good a boyfriend he is
Ilya doing the “would you still love me if I was a worm?” thing and without missing a beat or asking any questions Shane just goes “Yeah”
Harris films himself asking Shane random Ilya questions and Shane always having an answer. “Hey what Ilya’s favorite milkshake flavor?” “Mint.” “I’m buying everyone fun socks, what’s Ilya’s favorite color?” “Blue, but only if it’s light, he doesn’t like dark blue.” “What’s Ilya’s favorite fruit?” “Pears.”
Troy waits for Shane to sit on the bench looking at his phone or tying his skates then says “Oh hey Ilya’s coming in” and catches multiple examples of Shane immediately scootching over to one side to make room for Ilya to sit next to him
Ilya puts his feet up on Shane’s lap silently and Shane starts lightly massaging them. Ilya lays his head on Shane’s shoulder and Shane starts quietly playing with his hair
They film Ilya handing Shane random things and asking him to hold them and Shane does without question. The internets favorite is the one where Ilya pulls a pineapple out of his bag and asks Shane to hold it and he agrees, getting his gear on one handed so he can keep holding the pineapple in the other
Hayden gets a video of Shane letting Ruby brush his hair and fill it with clips while he and Jade do Ilya’s nails, Ilya laying with a face mask and cucumbers over his eyes and his head on Shane’s lap
I think if Shane had his way, Ilya would be everyone's favorite person.
Actually, I do want season 2 to blow its music budget on a mainstream song. But it’s not Diamonds by Rihanna, and not even because I dislike the placement of that song. I want them to blow all their money to get the Centaurs’ goal song, DJ Khaled’s “All I do is Win,” because I want the absolutely rancid vibes of Ilya scoring a hat trick and then just skating dejectedly back to the bench while that song plays as their fan (1) cheers, because yeah Ilya got a hat trick, but currently the score is 10-3.
Can we talk about Shane Hollander’s inherent kindness for a sec. Him introducing himself to Ilya trying to make him feel comfortable. Constantly asking him questions about himself and wanting to soothe his pain. Making space for Ilya in his home. Displaying his love for him openly in front of his parents. He’s so endlessly empathetic and I just love him ok
happy pride month to this iconic scene
My Shane and Ilya are both incredibly possessive of one another and quick to jealousy but while Ilya gets jealous in a “everyone wants you but they can’t have you, you’re mine and I will delight in showing everyone what they’re missing out on” way, Shane gets jealous in a “I will burn this club down with both of us in it” way.
I need you guys to walk with me and understand that Ilya and Shane's first fuck as a married couple takes place on the edge of Ilya's bed ("Our bed, Hollander, our marital bed--" "Jesus fucking Christ Ilya--") while Usher Yeah! plays at bone-melting volume from the backyard and guys from three different hockey teams yell the lyrics even louder. Shane realizes that Ilya is inadvertently thrusting to the beat and for one very brilliant second it is the hottest thing ever. The mood is genuinely almost ruined when the song switches to Sweet Caroline. Harris should never be allowed to DJ again.
"SWEET CAROLINE. BUM BUM BUM." - Eleven highly inebriated hockey players and David Hollander, who's having great memories of his own wedding where they played the same song.
"Good times never seemed so good..." - Ilya Rozanov, whisper-singing to himself and completely unaware of it as he rails his husband into next Tuesday.
"Why is this hot. Oh my god why is this hot." - Shane Hollander, who at the age of thirty is still discovering things about himself.
#happypridemonth
strangers to colleagues to friends to soulmates <3
face in the pillow that's how he likes itttt
Ilya finds an odd picture of Shane in a photo album at one point. He's maybe three, he's sitting on the massive purple sofa that Ilya has discovered the Hollanders owned when Shane was born. He's frowning, red-cheeked and he's got a strange plastic case on his thumb.
"Yuna," he says, shifting his elbows on the table to point at it. "What is this on his hand? Was broken?"
Shane's head snaps up from across the table, where he's pretending that Photo Album Time is very boring to him and not worth paying attention to. He hasn't scrolled on the article he's pretending to read for over five minutes.
"I never broke a bone as a kid," he says, brows furrowed. "Not until U13, when that fucking kid from Guelph--"
Yuna and Shane both inhale quickly through their noses in what Ilya has learned to recognize as a moderative measure, lest they start yelling about something that everyone else on Earth has forgotten about.
"No," Yuna says, once her face looks a little less intense. "No, it wasn't broken. It was this...contraption that the dentist gave us to correct his thumb-sucking. He was so mad about it, we only put it on him a few times."
"Oh, Jesus," Shane mutters, eyes going back to his phone.
"Aw," Ilya says. "Poor baby Shane." He taps his finger against one little red cheek and laughs. "You really do look so mad, sweetheart. How did you make him stop?"
"Hmm...you know, I don't remember," Yuna sighs, tilting her head. "I guess he just stopped by himself eventually. Do you remember, Shane?"
"No," Shane says, shortly.
"Of course, that didn't get rid of the oral fixation," Yuna sighs, adjusting her reading glasses as she flips the page. "The things you used to chew on, Shane. Pens and straws and--"
"Mom," Shane snaps, while Ilya vibrates beside him. "Can we not?"
"I was afraid to give him popsicles because I thought he would gnaw on the sticks until he got a splinter in his stomach."
"Mom!"
"Well, honey, it's true! And you did outgrow it eventually, so it's not as if you have to be embarrassed."
"Oh, you did?" Ilya says, shoulders shaking. "You outgrew the, uh, oral fixation?"
"Stop," Shane hisses.
"Mm. Excuse me." Ilya stands from the table and sweeps out onto the back porch, though the sliding door does nothing to prevent the sound of his guffaws from floating back into the kitchen.
"You know," Yuna says, "I'm just going to assume that this is some kind of language barrier thing--"
"Please stop."
Before Shane and Ilya move in together, Shane's at Ilya's place lamenting the lack of ingredients. As he looks for any kind of vegetable and protein he can cobble together for a meal, Shane's like, "Baby, when's the last time you cooked? Is this why you order so much takeout?".
And Ilya responds with a shrug and, "Maybe. Maybe I don't like to be alone with the knives too much."
And Ilya means it as a joke, Shane knows he does, but there's something hollow and scraped raw in Ilya's usual shit-eating grin that makes Shane's blood run cold. He immediately strides across the kitchen to pull Ilya into his arms. And Ilya tries to scoff at first, says that Shane's being so over-dramatic about a joke, but Shane just holds tighter, until Ilya's breathing goes funny against his chest in that way that tells him he's trying not to cry.
Shane doesn't trust himself to speak right now. The weight of what it would mean to lose this man is too much for him to talk about again, so instead he just holds him and hopes that this is enough to tell Ilya what he means. And when he eventually feels Ilya let go and sob against him, Shane guides both of them to the floor, pulls him into his arms, buries a hand in the back of his curls and just lets him cry until he's had enough.
When Ilya's tears finally stop, Shane presses a kiss to his forehead, trying to soothe down the crease that's etched between his eyebrows. As much as Ilya needed that release, Shane can see by the panic and embarrassment on his face that he needs a way back out of it now.
Shane rolls his eyes dramatically. "Fine, jesus, we'll get takeout then."
And Ilya looks up at him with a small grateful smile before letting out a shaky laugh. "See? I would say anything to get you to buy me McDonald's."
if hollanov is going to have a hockey playing daughter i need her to be a Hockey Player and by that i mean a BIG FUCKING DYKE OKAY. i need her to be a big ass baby like her dad shane hollander and grow up to be a complete tomboy OKAY. she needs to be beating the shit out of the boys in her grade who are mean to other girls. she needs to grow up loving hockey like her dads and visiting her "uncles" at centaurs games OKAY. i need her to watch ONE women's hockey game when she's like 6 and decide (like her dad) that she was going to do that as a job. i need her ass to be fucking 6'2 (or like 190 cm idc) with some BIG ass muscles and stealing her dads clothes and idc what position she plays but she going to be GOOD AT IT. and she's going to flirt with girls like her papa and half the girls on her team are going to have a crush on her. did i make this all up in my head? maybe but i still believe in it