Themes & Content Warnings: magic, witchcraft, loneliness, manipulation, female companionship, violence, murder, abuse, female rage and cult-like behaviour
“Are we still best friends?”
“I think it was always meant to be the two of us.”
“I know yesterday was… wack, but it's really not my fault, because I Googled it and Mercury was in retrograde, so, there you go.”
“My job doesn't define me, my hotness and my personality do.”
“I thought you were ride or die babe.”
“We only text boys using emojis.”
“What did that one bitch say? "A room of one's own"?”
“All I can tell you is that the police got involved, and [ name ] was committed to a hospital.”
“Is it crazy that I walked here without an umbrella?”
“We should get matching tattoos!”
“I am so fucking done with this coven!”
“I guess it's kinda cool to finally have some female friends.”
“Oh! Glitter miniskirts!”
“He poisoned me first! A childhood full of his venom, and a slow fucking death!”
“It's like we're rebelling against the patriarchy together.”
“That is so thoughtful of you...”
“It's not smoking it's praying.”
“I condemn you, snake.”
“It smells like puppy's breath and cinnamon sticks.”
“It's a placebo babe. this is just what paradise feels like.”
“Obvi I'm not pregnant. What if I had a boy and had to name him, like, Bob or some shit?”
“I went on a hot girl jog this morning. Could someone having a nervous breakdown go on a jog?”
“So what? At least I'm not fucking boring!”
“You know it's bad when the scientist is scared!”
“Do you have any idea what happened here?”
“I curse your ugliness and your cruelty.”
“Is this a coven?”
“It's not our fault they married a monster.”
“But like, what do you want to be up to tonight?”
“Miranda Priestly would totally take you to Paris.”
“It is so fucking exhausting to keep track of the way you manipulate narritives.”
“What you have done to me, let it rebound on you tenfold.”
“Burn it.”
“[ name ] you need to be more trusting, that's another unattractive quality we need to work on.”
“A snake is attempting to enter our garden, ladies.”
“The Hilary Duff collab is back. Thank Goddess.”
“Why do you hate me for saving you?”
“Are you mad at me?”
“Have you ever killed something before, [ name ]?”
“[ name ] told us we were going to try something fucking lit, a hex.”
“No, that doesn't sound right… anyways.”
“Chino pants are a very awkward length.”
“Oh, girl, it's just a matcha latte, I got you.”
“No, I'm a witch. We conjure confidence here.”
“You don't trust me, babe, I thought I was your BFF.”
“Look, please don't tell [ name ] about this.”
“As we all know, Marilyn Monroe was murdered by the United States Government on August 4th 1962.”
“You know I don't believe in hierarchy in female relationships.”
“If you don't do anything I'm going to tell everyone you did it!”
“Well I just have enough unattractive qualities.”
“I think the hex backfired.”
“Forgive me, Marilyn, for I have sinned.”
“Guys, I think I'm having a nervous breakdown.”
“I'm sorry [ name ], do you actually fucking hate women?”
“I am. I am both ride and die.”
“Wait, your coffee or your latte?”
“You killed your dad [ name ]!”
“What did we take?”
“You dimmed my fucking glow, girl.”
“Our magic is the mundane shit you would have been executed for in Salem”
“[ name ] and [ name ] are a part of an elite dead dad's club.”
“Thank you so much. I could have used that about ten minutes ago.”
“We do not take the escalator in our skinny heels.”
“I have a really bad case of main character syndrome.”
