👀 @ooftbh - Tumblr Blog

me every day, beginning A Task: agony! despair! woe! every moment on this wretched earth is filled with suffering! death! death! death!

ten minutes later: man, i'm so glad i washed the dishes & i was so normal about it

loumandliker

cats are like. i am very small and have cute little triangle ears. also locking me out of the bathroom is a hate crime

marvel-lous-things

Bartender: thanks for stopping that bar fight, spiderman. Can I get you a drink? It’s on the house

Peter: thank you, but I can’t

Bartender: why not

Peter:

Bartender:

Peter, trying not to give his age away: I’m pregnant

eldritchcannon

Bartender, shook: oh, congratulations, boy or girl?

Peter, now in full-on panic mode: it’s an uh, spider

moonbeamdagger

I’m seeing stuff in the notes about “Miles would do this” and I just want to say: you’re absolutely right. All Spider-folks across all universes share one (1) singular brain cell and most of the time it’s Gwen’s.

seananmcguire

As the current author of Spider-Gwen, I can attest that Gwen has not seen the brain cell in years.

marvel-lous-things

sephiebutsepia-deactivated20200

I FOUND IT

adragonhoardingstories

I finally lay my eyes upon this glorious post myself

mikushardlemonade

incorrectanimaniacsquotes

@ animaniacs twitter

funny-tik-toks

fluffygif

Ham’s Labyrinth

scope-dogg

You have been sentenced to wander eternally in the Fanta Labyrinth

dyke-werewolf

Mutuals do this

lesbianredpanda

THIS is the kind of stimulation I need in my enclosure

toxictiktoks

👁👁

baphonnicula

good animation, terrible everything else

parkchanwoohoo

I can't stop fucking thinking about this video

rainbow-femme

When my mom and aunt were younger my aunt was in high school and my mom in middle school. A group of girls were bullying my aunt and one slapped her in the lunch room. The principal met with my grandma and the other mom. He said they weren’t punishing the other girl because he didn’t get involved in “girl problems.” My grandma asked if that meant my aunt could retaliate the next time it happened and he said no then it would be a fight and they’d both get in trouble.

So my grandma turned away from him and to the other mom and said “I have another daughter. She doesn’t go to this school and she’s a star softball player with her own bat. You can tell your daughter to stop bothering mine or you can drive her to the hospital with a shattered jaw. That’s your choice.” And walked out.

Few months later that girl stole a necklace from my aunt. My grandma called the cops and they all drove to her house to get it back. The cop came outside with it and said he told the family my grandma wouldn’t press charges if they gave it back. My grandma took the necklace and said “Then you’re going to have to go in and tell them you lied because I am pressing charges. She’s a thief and I want her treated like one.”

My grandma was a single mom in the 70s with two daughters and she took no shit from men who tried to undermine her and her daughters.

rainbow-femme

She also got excommunicated and then re-communicated after bothering the Vatican enough to let her back in

rainbow-femme

She doesn’t even like being Catholic and is Episcopalian now. It was more of a “You can’t fire me, I quit!” which is even better, at least to me

owlinadayswork

op im begging you for more stories

yorunokatana

Please @rainbow-femme more? Pretty please?

rainbow-femme

Ok here’s some more.

She was a nurse up until recently (finally retired after trying and failing 4 times)

She got into it a little later in life and worked as an army nurse for a while before working regularly as a hospital nurse.

Most of the other nurses were either also new and young and did what they were told or older and experienced and were used to being bullied by the doctors. As she had dealt with soldiers and had to learn to tell army dudes what to do, she had no interest in letting doctors treat her less than them.

At her hospital the doctors would go into a room looking for something, ransack it, then leave it messy for a nurse to clean up. The first time one tried that on her she stood in the door and said he wasn’t leaving until he cleaned his mess. He tried to say he was busy and couldn’t take the time to clean and she said if someone started dying she’d let him know, and didn’t move until he cleaned his mess.

She became a terror to the doctors who she did not let give any shit. If she paged a doctor and he didn’t come right away, he needed a good reason and lying wouldn’t work because the nurses would tattle and say he was doing a crossword and ignored her, so if she paged they had to go after her or else she’d yell at them.

One time in particular a doctor was chatting with a nurse and didn’t notice she’d paged him five times. When he realized he went running down the hall, saying “Out of my way, [name] is mad at me!”

When my moms gallbladder was inflamed and near bursting after my brother was born, she went to my grandmas hospital. They told her she was fine and to wait, while she was on the floor holding her stomach and crying. My dad called my grandma and told her the situation so she marched down to the ER and said “That’s my daughter, what time today can you get her in for surgery?” When they tried to say they thought she should go home my grandma wouldn’t let them. Luckily they got her into surgery in time to avoid it bursting.

During the AIDS crisis, she also bullied the other nurses who would refuse to treat anyone with AIDS. She said if you treat smokers who gave themselves lung cancer you don’t get to turn around and say you won’t help an AIDS patient who you blamed for contracting the disease. Her favorite patient from that time was a man who got it from doing drugs that she took care of regularly. He had a cat named Speed Ball and he would bring in pictures to show her.