WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK TUMBLR

they/them, ono/jego, 20something, queer and polish, stream of consciousness blog, I DON'T TAG SHIT. YES THAT INCLUDES SPOILERS. YES THAT INCLUDES CONTENT WARNINGS. If you need something consistently tagged then this is *not* the blog to follow, I can't stress this enough. sometimes risque but no porn.

[librarycard]

google search How to become so nonbinary it kills people

[dollgirllandsknecht]

Machete

[windup-angel]

i see ok thank you

[orion-the-onion]

they slash them

[trans-girl-nausicaa]

zero inch nails: i don’t want to fuck you like any animal

[ryciny]

i painted an Epic Skull for my mental health

[podcastwizard]

every day i walk into work and my manager says “here is the rule you must enforce” and i go “got it bossman” and i spend a couple days enforcing the rule and then my manager comes up to me and says “why are you enforcing the rule? we changed the rule yesterday and didn’t tell you” and i go “ok bossman new rule it is” and then a customer comes in asking to break the new rule and i say “sorry you can’t it’s the rule” and they say “but you don’t understand the rule doesn’t apply to me” and then my manager comes out and says “they’re right the rule doesn’t apply to them” and i ask why and my manager says “it just doesn’t.” and then the next day we get rid of the rule entirely and no one remembered it existed in the first place.

anyway this sounds like a metaphor for neurodivergence or something but it’s not this is just my fucking life

[orpheuslament]

its imperative you sexualise that mentor/protégé relationship

[zoctopode]

can you imagine being a parent in the pokemon world and your kid comes home with one of those straight up basically human pokemon. i know those motherfuckers can talk.

its morning. i see my childs Throh getting some oj from the fridge. 'morning', i say. he doesnt catch himself in time and says 'morning' back. he freezes and we both stare at each other knowingly. 'throh,' he says, but its too fucking late

[what-even-is-thiss]

The reason your snacks are unsatisfying is that you need both carb and protein.

Carb starts your engine, protein keeps it going.

No carb, engine don’t start. No protein, engine dies out fast.

[what-even-is-thiss]

Easy carb add on:

Cookie

Fruit (canned or fresh)

Chips

Piece of bread

Popcorn

Crackers

Easy protein add on:

Nuts

Spoonful of nut butter

Cheese

Roasted chickpea snacks

Glass of milk (dairy or non dairy)

Small canned sausages or similar

[what-even-is-thiss]

Sugar in there.

[what-even-is-thiss]

I am pleased by people messaging me telling me that after adding a carb or protein to their snacks or meals they feel more satisfied all day. Yes, my plan is working. People are getting through their days with less hangry.

[matak12m]

Protein bars are this concept min-maxxed!

Just make sure your protein bars have a good ratio of carbs and protein! Some companies are out there making protein bars with like 20 grams protein, 60 grams sugar, and that's just a candy bar with worse flavour.

[laterkiss]

i am like the breadloser of the family

[diekatimitdemhutohnehut]

My grandmother once told me about the first time she lived alone during her studies and she just got the papers for her bread allowance. (It was after the war and everything was rationed.)

Her window stood open and a wind gust came and took her papers away.

No bread for a whole week.

[staceynumber1]

Chuch in Lviv

[killmurderfuck]

my dads response could not have been better

[killmurderfuck]

important addition

[flankout]

tee hee

[nesofuyu-deactivated20240825]

tee hee

[obsessivebookwormalert]

tee hee

[dogpuppy]

[itmeansalot]

Italians, huh? Maybe we're not so different after all. .

[screechingbeef]

Would you rather get:

Good Head from an Evil Woman

Evil Head from a Good Woman

Voting ended onAug 4

[screechingbeef]

Trumblrs ideal head-giver

[wehavekookies]

Old Mabel, she used to run illegal fighting pits in the City, no one knows for sure what she's up to now but she's plotting somewhere in the background.

[more portraits here]

Characters created for the Labyrinth story I put together with my friend, Pauli.

[laterkiss]

i am like the breadloser of the family

[amygdalae]

kind of hate my stupid caustic pussy for dissolving my underwear over time but it's kind of cool, like, scientifically

[destinationtoast]

dying at this sequence from @pinkydragon01 :

[halfbloodfanboy]

[tomb-mold]

the problem is i really do love staying up until one billion o'clock. it just cant be helped

[scorpio-system]

AAA video game publisher voice: "Look. The goose layed a golden egg, and that's nice! Everyone loved that egg. But keeping the golden goose means paying for bird feed and I don't want to, so I killed the goose."

[vanshira]

#‘that goose keeps laying golden eggs. that’s stagnation. I’m going to kill it and go look for a goose that lays diamond eggs’#‘that goose normally lays golden eggs but this time it laid a silver egg. I’m going to kill it because even though I can still make good#money with that it’s not as good as a golden egg’#‘that golden egg laying goose only lays an egg once a day instead of constantly shitting them out. I don’t care that golden eggs take time#if they’re not constant the goose is worthless to me’

@thebaldursmouthgazette y u leave all the good stuff in the tags