To the girl with the guts and the queen of runways:
You and I both expect (if you don’t, then let me just speak for myself) that since we’re not such close friends, I wouldn’t be able to write a long message of sorts to say everything that I must say. But on the other hand, since we’re not such close friends, I have so many things to say to you. So I admit I was wrong to expect that. Especially that through 3 consecutive years, you’ve been with me, my ups and downs and etc., no matter how even if you weren’t exactly right there. So here’s a long one, a long dramatic message of all sorts for you :)) (I guess you expected because according to zodiac signs, people who have Cancer as their sign are emotional and I am just that.)
Let me start off with how the bond between us was created and with an almost a typical phrase, thank you.
(But before that, really, my first impression of you was that you were a snob, not easy to approach because of some aura that is inexplicable you had before I know you, sorry. But I am now chewing my own words because you were just the exact opposite of what I thought and you made me realize more that we can never judge and know someone with just one glance.)
In the last two years that we were classmates, during Grade 8 and 9, we have been friends but just weren’t that close. We had our own circle of friends but not until we tried to explore out of them and make more friends. We weren’t exactly the type to choose a friend accordingly, we were only looking for just someone who you can talk to and I guess that’s how we became friends. Or more to that. Now, and we’re a year older, of course, we became close through our likes, “lokohans” (I guess it sounds better that way), and the things that made us just the type who would laugh at something occasionally. And especially when we participated a competition in Baguio and how there was only four of us and we became more close since we shared more moments together. And with that, I thank you.
I thank you for having shared laughter with me. I thank you for allowing (I don’t know if that’d be the most appropriate word for it, but still.) me to be your friend. I thank you for being a part of my life. (Please know that this is not a goodbye. Because while writing this, it gave me feels that it’s as if I’m saying goodbye.) I thank you for listening to my complaints and rants even if they may be annoying. I thank you for comforting me at times where I’m very near to giving up or where I have failed and was frustrated on things. I thank you for the moments we shared together, moments that I will forever keep and I will reminisce as time passes by. I thank you for accepting me as your friend and despite knowing my flaws and weaknesses, you positively accepted them, you accepted me.
Isa kang tunay na petmalodi. 😂😂😂
But with how you speak too much, I still wish that you would speak out more, truly and more openly. Because from what I have observed, it’s as if when some people answer you back, you would retreat and just give way. I wish you would stand up more for yourself and not let yourself be belittled by others. I know that you ooze with so much confidence but I’d ask you to use that to your advantage. People can judge us all they want but we’ve got to hang on and not let those criticisms drag us down. You can do better than that. And that’s something I believe in but for sure, is true.
Moreover, I know, too that because you are such an open person, people forget that there’s more to you than what we see. There’s more to you than what the world sees. You can speak of yourself all you want, you can rant and laugh all you want. But I know there’s more to those. I know that sometimes, beyond the smiles that you give us, and the twinkle in your eyes that you show off, deep inside, you’re trying to win a battle; you’re trying to overcome your own problems and you’re trying to conquer your fears from within you. I feel confident that my guess is right since every normal person have their own battles to win and obstacles to conquer. (Except that I know for a fact that you aren’t normal. Ha-ha. Oh well, you are extraordinary, a one of a kind.)
Aaaaaand I’d like to ask for you to stop freaking out or overreacting over such small things, sorry. I hope that your dreams will come true. But let me remind you because I think you forget sometimes that to have your dreams come true, you will have to act on them. I have faith in you that you can do it, you can make your dreams come true. I hope that you will become a successful person someday soon but will always remember the moments, the laughter and the fun we all had in High School. But I guess I should not say “I hope” because you will be, or rather, I meant from the very start that you are already successful in different ways.
You’ve proven to us that you can, too. But I know that sometimes you have moments of downfalls and breakdowns. But as you comforted me, I am telling you that everything will be alright. Because if things are meant to happen, they will. But if they aren’t, make them happen. So what’s so bad about that?
I would also like you to know that I’ll always be by your side. (NOT SO ME AND THAT’S SO CHEESY YIEEE). I’ll always be there to help you get through a labyrinth and survive an abyss or if ever you get stuck in an endless pit, I’ll always lend a hand. I may not know sometimes if you’re going through something and not be the first to ask but also know that I’m willing to listen and answer to your questions. I just hope that I’ll have the right answers that will satisfy your inquisitiveness and the right things to say that would comfort your broken heart (ESSU PAY).
This may just seem like a birthday greeting, after all, it is filled with so many well-wishes but still I wish you everything that you deserve. I wish you the things that you would be needing in the future times. I wish you the places you’d want to go to and love to go back to and let them be your sanctuaries, your time for a peace of mind and adventure, too. And most especially, I wish you the people who’d positively accept your flaws and weaknesses. Those who would never space out on you and leave you behind. And those who would gladly stay by your side at times of downfalls and especially at times when you are somehow shameless and they would not get embarrassed of you.
This would be a perfect message unless I put things I have done to you for me to be sorry. To tell you honestly, I don’t remember doing anything that hit a nerve or something that gave way to you, planting some hate on me. But then I remember one time when I made you believe that it was I who picked you as my cringle in our Grade 9 Christmas party when in fact it was not I who did, it was Katreena. I’m sorry for that and I hope you forgive me and know that that was those joke times that I wish you did not take seriously. But if ever there was anything serious that I have done to you and it is really a necessity and a must for me to ask for forgiveness, I am saying sorry now. I’d like it if you’d say it to me personally that I have done something out of the line so I could say sorry personally. However, I really hope that I did nothing that crossed the line.
I am trying to figure out what more do I have to say and what more do I want to say but the corner of my eyes caught the word-count of this message and the page-count, too. It has come long enough. And I guess and I truly hope that I have said enough and what I have said to you matters in some ways. Even if the length doesn’t matter at all, I hope you appreciated how I had so many things to say to you and appreciate yourself too for everything about yourself that I’ve written about. After all, you deserve that self-appreciation, that self-boost.
I hope you won’t mind that you won’t be able to read an ending to this. Screw the endings, there’s more to this friendship, more to the moments that we’ve had together as friends, more to the years that we’ve spent than what we expect. As cliché as this may be, I know that we’ve still got a long way to go. We didn’t come this far to only go this far, duh.
Hi to you, Accountant! Sending all the love from here in Caritan to wherever you are. XOXO
P.S. I will never forget how once we argued about this but I will always say the same thing over and over again: Win or lose, it’s the school we choose. 💙💙 But more to that, of course is that I will always and forever be loyal and true to the Cagayan National High School!
titsay
prguitarman
theartofmadeline
snowghoul
andulkaphoto
s-u-f-j-a-n-s-t-e-v-e-n-s
