If you have a suspicion your kid is autistic, you need to follow up.
This was my parents’ mistake. My parents “didn’t think it was a problem” and chose not to get me diagnosed. They weren’t bad parents, but being a good parent to an allistic child is not the same as being a good one to an autistic child.
I have emotional abuse symptoms. I get anxious when I hear footsteps outside my door. My heart rate jumps when I hear garage doors open. My parents were never mean, my parents apologized if they ever snapped at me or said something out of line, my parents spelled out that they loved me constantly.
But my parents forced me to talk when I was nonverbal. My parents left me sitting at the kitchen table for hours in attempt to make me eat foods I couldn’t. My parents scolded me for leaving my own birthday parties to hide in my room because I was overwhelmed. My parents pulled me out of my hyperfocus when I was trying to do homework. My parents didn’t allow me to stim or doodle during things like church or school. My parents got irritated if I wore earplugs or headphones to drown out the noise of our constantly noisy household. My parents once took my bedroom door off its hinges for two days because I kept closing it when they told me not to.
When you’re a parent, and you’re trying your best and you’re doing everything out of all the parenting books, you need to understand that autistic children are not in the parenting books. They play by different rules. And things that might work for allistic children could be permanently damaging for autistics.
If you have a suspicion or a feeling, get your kid diagnosed. Research autism symptoms. Parent them accordingly.
Because if you don’t you could be breaking that relationship completely and not even knowing it.
