positivity for men

Ronnie / this blog is run by somebody who just wants to give men some love and positivity! we don't see that enough 💕 Don't come here to send hate, simply because you can't handle positivity that isn't for yourself. This isn't a thot zone. It's a thotful zone.

[feralthicket-blog]

my problem with Ariana Grande’s fan base (YFIP)

this doesn’t go for the majority of fans, a lot of you guys are awesome, sweet, and just want to support her! however, like in any fandom, there’s a pocket of problematic individuals with a toxic have mind.

1. The Mac Miller Situation

When Mac Miller passed away, a few nasty individuals sent Ariana some hate in her social media comments, which was in no way right or necessary. However, this led to fans making posts about how terrible the situation must be for Ariana, and how they were sending Ariana their prayers and love. 

They turned a situation about a dead man into a situation victimizing Ariana Grande.

No prayers for Mac, or his family, or even reflection on just how difficult Mac Miller’s final hours must have bee. The fan base is sort of blinded to just how disrespectful their tunnel vision tweets can be, in regards to Mac. The world lost an artist, a family lost a member, Ariana just needs to deal with hate tweets.

The same hate tweets that are now being directed at her ex fiance…

2. The Pete Davidson ordeal

Not gonna lie, I thought they were pretty cute together.

However, throughout their entire relationship, Ariana’s fans were largely with me on this. So, what happened? Why the sudden Pete hate?

They didn’t work out.

Terrifying, right? He made the terrible mistake of rushing into a relationship, and deciding mutually that it just wasn’t the right time!

Can you believe it? Then photo shopped images of Pete outside on the street, begging for change began to surface. Terrible posts calling him degrading names, stating how ugly and undesirable he is, how he has no job, how poor he is, etc.

Pete was relevant before Ariana, and still is. For you young, teenage girls who are completely blindsided by this…

He’s an actor on a little show some of you might have heard of.

Maybe he’s ugly-cute, and maybe he’s got a larger, awkward frame. Cool. While Ariana receives supportive messages from fans, and well wishes, Pete has just been ridiculed into the dirt, specifically by these little demon fans. 

3. Martyr complex by proxy

In psychology a person who has a martyr complex, sometimes associated with the term victim complex, desires the feeling of being a martyr for their own sake, seeking out suffering or persecution because it either feeds a psychological need, or a desire to avoid responsibility.

Ariana’s fans have a Martyr complex, but with Ariana as their chosen martyr. She’s had such a hard year. Her ex OD’d! There was a bombing at her concert! Her engagement was broken off! Oh, how will the poor thing cope?

Yes, her year was hard, terribly so, and my heart aches for her plight. However, her fans erase the effect that these events have had on other people.

Mac Miller overdosed. His family must be torn and trying to pick up the pieces.

Children and adults were injured, maimed, and killed by an explosive at an event that was supposed to be fun and secure.

Pete was also in a relationship with Ariana, and loved her so much that he got matching tattoos, and proposed. His heart is aching too.

I don’t hate anyone, but this little group of ariana’s fans attack anyone who speaks one word against her, victimizes ariana in every situation, and believes she can do no wrong whatsoever. None of them consider the feelings of anyone except for their beloved Ariana.

It’s gross.

[devillefort-master]

By creating a legacy, by living a life worth remembering, you become immortal.

[jayykesley]

Man, I love boys

[cherrycolamlm]

bi boys are amazing

bi boys who prefer boys? perfect.

bi boys who prefer girls? lovely.

bi boys who like all genders equally? beautiful.

bi boys who like nb people? fantastic.

bi boys who are nb themselves? flawless.

bi trans boys? stunning.

bi boys of color? magnificent.

mentally ill bi boys? exceptional.

disabled bi boys? wonderful.

bi boys who don’t speak english or have strong accents? outstanding.

religious bi boys? excellent.

bi boys are all completely brilliant and i love them they deserve every good thing in the world! if ur a bi boy and ur reading this i love u!

[louisgloom]

my face and my bod are changing n i love who i am becoming. life is stressful but i’m still doing good

1 year n 1 month on testosterone.

[mj-theskywitch]

I can I get uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuh love for boys with stretch marks

[jaasonk]

Hey Tumblr. If you could DM me some positive comments or compliments, that would be great. Just needing a pick-me-up. Thanks 😘

[ouijadere-blog]

sorry to interrupt your regularly scheduled posts but please support my art on @punkedpixel

[bloodiinfections]

tired of men who are sexually assaulted being ignored bc men should like it. or the fact that people bring up arguments and get shut down on here despite it being true lol

[forensix]

Katy Perry interrupted a male contestant named Trevor to say, “You’re SO hot” and ask him if he was engaged. In case you needed more reason to believe she’s garbage.

[ouijadere-blog]

more evidence, she was quite literally preying on him. again, switch the genders and see how calm you are about the situation

[arwenundomielarchive-deactivate]

katy perry kissed a 19 year old american idol contestant without his consent during an audition. he was uncomfortable and had been saving his first kiss for somebody special. please don’t let this be ignored just because the victim is male.

[waffle-crime-deactivated2021071]

He was also so unnerved afterwards that he couldn’t audition at his best and didn’t pass the round

[ouijadere-blog]

people are trying to brush it off by saying he didn’t care, of course he’d say that to the media, he wouldn’t make a big deal about it to news networks or on live TV

[ouijadere-blog]

responding to some crtics of male positivity blogs.

- every argument you make using someone’s sexuality, race, or gender can be flipped around on your own race, sexuality, or gender, and then you wouldn’t like it too much.

- you’re actually hurting people’s feelings. and before you say ‘straight people’s feelings < equality for all’, or some less dramatic iteration of that, I’m not talking about shit on a wide spread scale. I’m talking about people who feel the need to attach extravagant labels to themselves or express ‘white guilt’ because you people literally do not know how to stop generalizing EVERYTHING

- boys don’t deserve equality. neither do trans people, or gay people, etc. no one inherently deserves a positivity post on a blogging website, but there are blogs who choose to give it. if you don’t like their choices, GET OFF OF THE BLOG.

- “straight boys get positivity too” “why do cishets need positivity and support?? they can literally just go outside” why the heck is that argument so prevelant? My boyfriend doesn’t just step outside and get a pat on the back for being cis, white, or male. there are, however, people who go and get rewarded (possibly inadvertently) for being black, gay, trans, etc etc. Yes! You definitely face oppression. Not denying that. However, little white cishet Timmy working at 7/11 down the street is not the reason you face oppression!

[cattgirl]

[ouijadere-blog]

ah, yes, the intelligent responses of the opposition

[ablackwomansurvivingrape]

Resources for Male Rape/Abuse Survivors: Articles,Books, Webpages and Blogs

Articles & Links

RAINN’s Article on Male Sexual Assault

Male Sexual Assault

Men And Sexual Trauma

Male Rape & Assault: Dispelling the Myths

Myths about male rape

Silent Victims: Bring Male Rape Out of the Closet

RELATIONSHIPS; COUNSELING MALE RAPE VICTIMS

Sexual abuse of males, prevalence, possible lasting effects and resources

Male to Male Child Sexual Abuse in the Context of Homophobia

Treatment Needs of Sexually Abused Men

Female Perpetrators and male sexual abuse victims: Society betrayal of boys

Male Rape survivors

The Hard Truth About Girl-on-Guy Rape

Against his will: Female-on-male rape

Books For Male Rape/Abuse/Incest Survivors

Books for Male Rape Survivors

Male On Male Rape: The Hidden Toll of Stigma and Shame

Understanding Male Sexual Abuse: Why Male Victims Remain Silent

To the Survivors: One Man’s Journey as a Rape Crisis Counselor with True Stories of Sexual Violence

Echoes of Innocence - Survivor [Kindle Edition]

Male Rape: The Emergence of a Social and Legal Issue

Women Who Rape Men (Female Sex Predators)

Not Quite Healed: 40 Truths for Male Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse

The Male Survivor: The Impact of Sexual Abuse [Kindle Edition]

Evicting the Perpetrator: A Male Survivor Guide to Recovery from Childhood Sexual Abuse

Victims No Longer: The Classic Guide for Men Recovering from Sexual Child Abuse

Opening The Door: A Treatment Model For Therapy With Male Survivors Of Sexual Abuse 

Male Survivors: 12-Step Recovery Program for Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse : With Exercises for Personal Growth 

One out of Six and Many, Many, More: A Collection of Poetry from a Male Survivor of Sexual Abuse

In Cabin Six : An Anthology of Poetry by Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse

Adult Male Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse

Silent Rage: African American Boys and Sexual Abuse [Kindle Edition]

 Blogs and Pages for Male Rape Survivors

Breaking the culture of silence-a place for male survivors to share experiences, connect, and heal. You are not alone.

Male Survivors of Sexual Abuse 

MenWeb - Men’s Voices: Surviving and Living Male Survivors of Childhood Sex Abuse

Mpower- Supporting Male Survivors of Abuse

Male Survivor- Overcoming sexual victimization of boys and men 

Living Well Resource for men who have been sexually abused or assaulted 

Men Raped Support Forum

SurvivorsUK -Help and counselling for male survivors of rape and abuse in the UK

Mankind- Resources and support services for male survivors of sexual assault and abuse

[digitaltails-blog]

my most popular post is me drawing J3T like an anime character so here’s some gay shit to make you forget. forgive me father for I have sinned.

[ouijadere-blog]

Boys!

Remember, if you're underaged or don't want a kid, make sure you bring your own condoms to a meet up. You can't trust other people to bring them, or to bring condoms that haven't been tampered with! I'm not saying you shouldn't trust anyone, but if it's your first time with them or a one night stand, your own trusted selection of protection should do the trick!

(I'm so sorry for unintentionally rhyming this isnt Doctor Suess this is wrap your willy)

[digitaltails-blog]

caught my boyfriend looking at a 1968 FORD THUNDERBIRD today

im sorry i cant be her

[lastsonlost]

Dear Blokes: an Open Apology to Men. | Rebelle Society

There’s nothing courageous about raising a man-hater. We can raise kick-ass girls without destroying the male species in the process.

Dear Blokes,

I am writing this letter to apologize for all the man-hating you receive on a daily basis. I honestly have no idea how you cope as well as you do.

In recent years on social media, there’s been a never-ending stream of vitriolic articles and commentary targeting you.

It seems man-hating has become a socially accepted blood-sport, and as the daughter of a wonderful father, this upsets me greatly.

What happens to boys growing up amidst this vicious hatred? And what is it doing to our daughters?

There’s nothing courageous about raising a man-hater. We can raise kick-ass girls without destroying the male species in the process.

Acclaimed British novelist and librettist, Doris Lessing, summed it up best before her death in 2013. She said:

“We have many wonderful, clever, powerful women everywhere, but what is happening to men? Why did this have to be at the cost of men?

I was in a class of nine- and 10-year-olds, girls and boys, and this young woman was telling these kids that the reason for wars was the innately violent nature of men.

You could see the little girls fat with complacency and conceit, while the little boys sat there crumpled, apologizing for their existence, thinking this was going to be the pattern of their lives.

The teacher tried to catch my eye, thinking I would approve of this rubbish.

This kind of thing is happening in schools all over the place and no one says a thing.

It has become a kind of religion that you can’t criticize because then you become a traitor to the great cause, which I am not.

It is time we began to ask who are these women who continually rubbish men. The most stupid, ill-educated and nasty woman can rubbish the nicest, kindest and most intelligent man and no one protests.

Men seem to be so cowed that they can’t fight back, and it is time they did.”

Men are being emasculated. They are being stripped of their identities and biological natures. There doesn’t seem to be a safe space for men to be men any more.

Humor isn’t allowed. Nuance and allegory are prohibited. What liberty will the outrage police take away next? When a man does raise his voice in the current climate, he is either mocked, bullied or labeled a mansplainer — he is unable to  win.

I want gender equality and sexual equality just as much as anyone else. But when the vigilantes attempt to achieve it via the degradation of men, my feathers get sweaty and ruffled and I have to speak up.

I am so proud to be the daughter of a beautiful gentleman.

I am so proud to be the aunt of a beautiful nephew.

I am so proud to have been the friend, colleague and lover of numerous beautiful men.

And with all that said, I’m sorry. Sorry that I can’t do more and affect change more regarding this man-hating issue that has spread like a disease throughout the world.

I wish to close this letter with another quotation from Doris Lessing:

“There’s an unconscious bias in our society: girls are wonderful; boys are terrible. And to be a boy, or young man, growing up, having to listen to all this, it must be painful.”

Best regards,

Ashamed.

@positivityforboys @malepositive @boys-positivity @boypositiveplace

[unlimitedgoats]

[vierge-noire]

“Men are being emasculated. They are being stripped of their identities and biological natures. There doesn’t seem to be a safe space for men to be men any more.”

[lastsonlost]

I’m not sure there’s a safe place period any time the young man to be raped in people rally behind the rapist. http://lastsonlost.tumblr.com/post/156422272802/michigan-girl-17-charged-with-raping-19-year-old

[buuuluska]

They ain’t gonna liste, they will use gifs cause they really can’t point anything wrong with this letter. Also I love your blog.

[lastsonlost]

Thank You @its-blackkittenbitches

Now I’m not overly religious person but truth is truth.

Matthew 25:42-46

For I was hungry and you gave me nothing to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink,  I was a stranger and you did not invite me in, I needed clothes and you did not clothe me, I was sick and in prison and you did not look after me.’

“They also will answer, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or needing clothes or sick or in prison, and did not help you?’

“He will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did not do for one of the least of these, you did not do for me.’

Just as they are callous and indifferent to the pain and suffering of others, they too will face the same callous and indifferences.

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

[lastsonlost]

[klear5]

Amen sister.

[lastsonlost]

And there was no line. Just scroll up to the gif posting haters with no credible argument. Like the lady said they hate in order to feel good about themselves because they think hating makes them look good. But I don’t blame them because hating is addictive. However I do pity them hate is literally toxic. 

PS. Get you head out your ass @vierge-noire and get help.

[conservative-for-life]

Some so called “feminists” are just man haters. I know, my roommate is one of those. Men are toxic to her. Which is funny, she is transgender f/m. She has no clue what it is to be a man or to feel like a man, even while trying to identify as one.

[lastsonlost]

I recommend the book Self-Made Man: One Woman’s Year Disguised as a Man by Norah Vincent

For 18 months, she disguised herself as a man, renamed herself Ned, joined a men’s bowling league, visited strip bars, and dated women. Along the way, she found that the freedom and privileges enjoyed by men were counterbalanced by a constant testing and severe limits on emotions. She also found women to be distrustful, ever ready to criticize men for being emotionally distant yet clearly preferring men who met stereotypical images of strength and virility.

 Vincent is frank about her experiences–the hard business of sexual transactions devoid of emotions, the easy bonding between men, fear of sexual attraction among men, and, ultimately, the explosion of her own notions of sex roles. She also explores the guilt she feels about her deception. Writing from the perspective of a gay woman who had a view of the male world that women don’t get to see, Vincent finds unexpected complexities in the men she meets and in herself as well.

After her eighteen months living disguised as a man, she felt she was a danger to herself.  A week later she checked in to a hospital with severe depression.

Vincent says she’s healed now and glad to be rid of Ned. But her views about men have changed forever.

She concluded saying, “Men are suffering. They have different problems than women have, but THEY DON’T HAVE IT BETTER,” she said. “They need our sympathy. They need our love, and maybe they need each other more than anything else. They need to be together.”

Ironically, Vincent said, it took experiencing life as a man for her to appreciate being a woman. “I really like being a woman. … I like it more now because I think it’s more of a privilege.” SOURCE 1#   SOURCE 2#  

Norah Vincent has not been the last to come this conclusion about men. Many others including the author of this LETTER TO MEN have come to a similar conclusion. Most recently documentary film maker Cassie Jaye has found herself asking the same questions.