[aguefort]

[spoilers for the fantasy high finale!]

THE PROMPOCALYPSE MIRACLE IN ALL ITS GLORY

[runcibility]

It appears that just like Gritty...

… the Untitled Goose is now a leftist icon:

(graphic taken from https://twitter.com/IGN/status/1175492642773200897)

In celebration of our apparently new SJW ally, I give you some handy graphics:

[rorytelling]

At this point “being a sjw” just means “liking things”

[flamewarp]

Those damn SJWS and their *looks at hand* “Geese”

[urbanism]

Stan socialist goose

[baenling]

i was confused about this so i googled it. there’s literally just a bit of text at the end of the game’s credits about how australia still belongs to the aboriginals. that’s it. that’s what they’re mad about.

“This game was made on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin Nation. We pay our respects to their Elders, past and present. Sovereignty was never ceded.

“Thank you very much for playing our videogame.”

[ourimportantthings]

The nasty SJWs and their *squints* respecting aboriginal people.

But seriously for non Australians that might not know this, text like the above is very common place here and almost every school I’ve ever been too has thanked the land their on and payed respects to the Elders. Even local singers and performers do it too before a set. Australia is certainly a fucked up place but we got one thing right.

[my-witchy-journal]

✨ Some Herbs, Flowers and Plants in Witchcraft✨

ALLSPICE: increase energy, love, healing, luck

ANGELICA: protection, purification

Benefits for health: improve digestion

ARTEMISA: dream divination, clairvoyance

AZUCENA: sentimental improvement, progress, peace  

BASIL: economic success, money, prosperity, peace, protection, happiness, purification, tranquillity, love

BAY: fosters loving vibrations, protection, wards off negativities in a home, success, wisdom, divination

BAY LEAF: protection, purification, healing, strength, good fortune, money and success

BIRCH: protection, purification

BLACK PEPPER: protection, courage  

CALENDULA: happiness, prosperity, love, psychic power, harmony

Benefits for health: treat skin irritation (like eczema, bruises, scars, scrapes)

CARAWAY: protection against negativity, health, mental abilities, fidelity

Benefits for health: antitheft

CARDAMOM: passion, sex, intimacy  

CARNATION: cosmic energy, magic, disease, protection, strength energy, luck, healing

 White: peace, healing

Red: sex, love, passion

Yellow intellectual movement

Rose: disappearance of disagreements  

CHAMOMILE: brings love, healing, relieves stressful situations, prosperity, peace, healing, harmony, happiness

Benefits for health: sooth stomach problems, calm headache, calm nerves

CHICHWEED:

Benefits for health: astringent,  cooling (topically), demulcent, relieves itchiness

CINNAMON: aphrodisiac, passion, love, luck, prosperity, success, raises spiritual vibrations, purification, energy, healing, protection

Benefits for health: antimicrobial, aromatic, astringent, mild stimulant, relieves wind

CLOVE: protection, purification, mental ability, healing

COFFEE: intellect awakening  

COMFREY: health, healing, protection during travel, prosperity

CUMIN: protection spell

DAFFOIL: luck, fertility, love

DAISY: love, flirtation, hope, innocence

DANDELION: divination, interaction with the spirit world, wishes

Benefits for health: bitter tonic, diuretic, liver cleanser,  mild laxative

DILL: good fortune, tranquillity, prosperity, lust, protection

ELACAMPANE: protection, luck, dispels negative vibration, plant spirit communication

EUCALYPTUS: health, healing  

FENNEL: longevity, protection,  healing,  purification  

GARDENIA: harmony, healing, love, peace

GARLIC: protection against evil eye  

GERANIUM: protection, happiness, mental clean up, fertility, love, healing, courage

GINGER:

Benefits for health: fight cold, calm stomach, suppress nausea

HAWTHORN:

Benefits for health:  antioxidant, heart  tonic,  lowers  blood  pressure, relaxes blood vessel

HIBISCUS: divination, dreams, love and lust

HERBABUENA: money, prosperity  

HYACINTH: love, happiness, protection

INCENSE: Spirituality

IRIS: wisdom, valour, peace, harmony, love

IVY: protection, healing

JACINTO: overcoming old pains of love  

JASMINE: divinatory dreams, sexuality, moon, feminine energy, seduction, sensuality, love, meditation, spirituality, harmony, prosperity

LAUREL: success, glory  

LAVENDER: love, peace, restful sleep, clairvoyance, happiness, healing, money, passion, protection, relief from grief, longevity, meditation, harmony, tranquillity, purification

LEMON: happiness, love

LEMON BALM: love, success, healing

Benefits for health: antidepressant, antispasmodic, insect repellent, relaxant, relieves  wind, topical  anti-viral

LEMON VERBENA: love, purification

LILAC: protection, banishing negative energy

LILAS: purification, love  

LILY: helps memory, love, protection, elimination of hexes, rebirth

LILLY OF THE VALLEY: enhances concentration, mental ability, encourage happiness    

MADRESELVA: helps remove the vices and addictions

MAGNOLIA: love

MANZANO: love, happiness  

MARJORAM: happiness, protection, love, joy, courage, health, money

MIMOSA: divinatory dreams, love

MINT: avoid jealousy, dreams, protection, prosperity, joy, fertility, purification, love, success, lust, travel

Benefits for health: calm headache, stimulate appetite, aid digestion, antiseptic,  antispasmodic,  diaphoretic, mild analgesic, mild bitter, mild sedative, relives wind

MEADOWSWEET:

Benefits for health: antacid, anti-inflammatory, anti-rheumatic, astringent

MUGWORT: psychic powers, protection, increases lust and fertility, prophetic dreams, divination, relaxation, tranquillity, banishing, consecration (*Do not ingest, and do not even handle if pregnant*)

NAIL: Protection spells  

NARCISO: Love

NARDO: Love

NETTLE: protection, healing, lust

NUTMEG: Money, prosperity, good luck, protection, psychic abilities, happiness, love, health

PANSY: divination, communication, happiness, love

PARSLEY: Protection in general, power, strength, lust, purification, prosperity  

PATCHOULI: Money, sex  

PEPPERMINT: Purification

PINE: Health, Healing  

POPPY: tranquillity, fertility, prosperity love, sleep, invisibility, money, luck

ROMERO: Longevity, purification, prosperity

ROSE: Love, encourages closeness with nature, healing, divination, tranquillity, harmony, psychic ability, spirituality, protection, luck

Red: passion, peace, welfare  

Yellow: commitments  

White: spiritual love

ROSEMARY: love, lust, promote healthy rest, protection, improving memory, wisdom, health, healing, mental power, purification

Benefits for health: calm headache, stimulate circulatory, nerve and digestive tonic, anti-inflammatory, antioxidant, antispasmodic

SAFFRON: money, physical movement  

SAGE: longevity, wisdom, protection, dispels negative energy, purification, health, immortality,               wishes

Benefits for health: calm anxiety,  antimicrobial, antioxidant, astringent,         digestive tonic, oestrogenic, general  tonic,reduces sweating

SALVIA: money

SANDALWOOD: spirituality, healing, tranquillity, sexuality, desire.  

SNAPDRAGON: protection from illusion or deception, reflect negative energy

STAR ANISE: peace, tranquillity, awakening of psychic awareness , Luck, spiritual connection, psychic and magical power  

SUNFLOWER: sun, sun energy, happiness, success, health, associated with welcome and family, fertility

THYME : health courage. Eliminates nightmares, Attracts loyalty, affection, psychic abilities  

TULIP: prosperity, abundance, protections, love, happiness

VANILLA: sex

VALERIAN: protection, drives away negativity, purifies sacred space

VERBENA: calm headaches, eases stress, divination, prosperity, reversal of negative activity

VIOLET: peace, hope, harmony, protection, luck, love, sleep, tranquillity, encourage peace among people, calm nightmares, fertility, abundance

WATER LILY: happiness

YARROW: healing, divination, love, promotes courage and confidence

Resources: 

Wicca Herbal Magic by Lisa Chamberlain

Charms, Spells and Herbs by Esteban Portela

The Green Witch by Arin Murphy-Hiscock

Grimoire of a Kitchen Witch by Rachel Patterson

[witcheystuffandthings]

Starting a Grimoire📙

Ok so somebody asked for some tips on starting their grimoire so here’s this long ass post for anyone who needs it.

You do not need some big fancy notebook it can be a really cheap one or it can be online or in a scrapbook/binder

Ideas of what to put in your Grimoire

🌹~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~🌹

🌌Table of contents

🌌A page about you, your birthstone, fav herbs/crystals to make it more personal

🌌Types of magick

🌌Types of witches

🌌The history of magick/witches in your country or local area

🌌About the deities you worship if you worship any

🌌Local myths/legends of interest

🌌herbs and their magickal properties

🌌 Candles and their magickal properties

🌌Essential oils and their magickal properties

🌌Crystals and their magickal propererties

🌌Gemstones and their magickal properties

🌌Runes

🌌Sigils

🌌Casting a circle

🌌Spells and how to cast them

🌌What days/times are best for casting spells

🌌Zodiac signs

🌌Moon phases

🌌Familiars

🌌Altars, what they are and what you need to set one up

🌌Moon water

🌌Sun water

🌌Banishing

🌌Binding

🌌Cleansing

🌌Grounding

🌌Spirit work, how to do it and how to stay safe

🌌Put protection sigils over the Grimoire to keep it safe and hidden

🌌Planets and their relation to magick

🌌Sabbats

🌌Witch terminology 101

Organizing a Grimoire

🌹~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~🌹

🍁This isn’t needed, if you prefer the write as you go method that’s fine.

🍁For those of us who prefer to have it organized a table of contents is a must.

🍁Try and plan what your going to write down when. If it helps write down in a notebook or in your book of shadows every idea you can think of putting in your grimoire and number them.

🍁It’s ok if it’s not ‘perfect’ chances are this is your first grimoire so not only is ok its natural to make a few mistakes here and there

🍁Write in pencil if you don’t like crossing out mistakes or using tipex

🍁The key thing to remember is that it doesn’t need to look 'Tumblr perfect’ as long as you understand it

[failnation]

Someone went to town with sticky lizards in this Kmart.

[thecutespook]

They threw some of them so hard they exploded

[reinelefey]

RANT TIME

I work retail.

We sell these things in eyeball form for Halloween.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE. PLEASE

Fucking PLEASE STOP THROWING THEM ON THE CEILING.

We get in trouble when this happens because it’s a loss of merchandise for us. The sheet rock in the ceiling tiles DOES SOMETHING to those little fuckers, and it is like SUPER GLUE. They come off so HARD AND PRACTICALLY MELTED TO THE CEILING.

WHich damages the ceiling tile. Guess who is responsible if a ceiling tile falls on a guest?

Fucking us.

I had to climb a twelve foot ladder in order to pull these fuckers off, and the ceiling tile CAME WITH THEM. Which gave me a LOVELY black eye and covered me in God knows what what in that fucking drop ceiling.

ITS NOT FUCKING FUNNY. IT’S ACTUALLY A DANGER FOR THE EMPLOYEE CLEANING IT UP.

This has been an ANGRY PSA.

[ourimportantthings]

While the above PSA is very important, I would like to also note that my local Kmart has something like this. One whole aisle worth of the toys section had these sticky toys on the roof and all of the employees refused to take it down. So the roof stayed like that for about 3 years until they finally replaced parts of the roof. It was very fun seeing as a child and contributing to the mess of the ceiling knowing for a fact that no one would get hurt by it (except my friend who had one land in her eye lol). Good times 🥰

[catchymemes]

Credit: @notlikethecar

[feijoaaas]

i hope this was posted literally two minutes ago because this needs about 500k notes stat

[cursedcatimages]

a worthy adversary, but you are still no match for me

[derp-ology]

OP if you don’t change your url i will appear in your house at 3 pm central time to decorate your shoelaces with my tears

[cursedcatimages]

i will be awaiting your arrival

[strangehorse]

believe me when I say I get the frustration of people who say they’re gluten free ordering things that contain gluten and not caring, but I will always always always assume someone who orders gluten free is being deadly serious. if I’m wrong, the worst thing I’ve done is wasted a bit of my time; if I assume they aren’t serious and they are, then I’ve increased a stranger’s risk of colon cancer

[strangehorse]

“I bet they’re not even allergic to nuts!”

oh gee would i rather have the petty joy of proving a stranger ‘wrong’ or risk sending somebody into fucking anaphylaxis? it’s not hard folks

[bethany-sensei]

Also, plenty of people have food sensitivities that allow them to eat a small amount of certain foods before they begin to experience negative effects, and it’s nobody’s job to police what they do or do not want to put in their bodies. Digestion is weird y’all.

[kipplekipple]

Either way it’s a matter of consent. I consent to eating X under condition Y. It isn’t up to anyone else to decide whether or not my reasons are valid, or good enough. This is my body, what I say goes.

[garlic-gal]

Questioning ur gender as an afab person is hard bc ur like do I genuinely identify as Not A Woman or do I just not identify with the negative images of women that have been shoved at me since I was born? Like do I not like being referred to as a girl because that really isn’t who I am or is it because being connected to femininity comes along with some not great associations? And then there’s the question of am I really Not a Woman or am I just butch? And then u get into questioning what gender even is to begin with. What is gender? What is masculinity? What is femininity? Is there anything inherent to either of them, or is it all socially constructed bullshit? Does gender actually exist?? If not, then what the fuck is my relationship with gender?

[x-menunited]

[marxisforbros]

“There’s a cure?!” asked the girl that kills everything she touches.  “Hey shut up we’re perf” replied the girl that makes clouds. 

[theboylondon]

For real though. Storm has stopped an entire tsunami before. “Makes clouds my ass” she can conjure lightning and tornadoes and is revered as a god in her tribe. She literally changes atmospheric pressure and that’s how she flies. So fuck you. Storm is flawless.

[sun-spiral-deactivated20210109]

I think you missed the part where the GIRL WHO KILLS EVERYTHING SHE TOUCHES wants to NOT KILL EVERYTHING SHE TOUCHES and everyone dismisses her incredible misfortune just because the lady who is the AVATAR OF THE STORM won the fucking SUPERPOWER LOTTERY

[mangonetics]

“Finally, a cure for my chainsaw hands!” decreed Chainsaw-Hands Joe.

“There is no cure,” said Johnny Five-Dicks. “There’s nothing wrong with us.”

[holyromanhomo]

The last comment literally always cracks me up

[veronicaawakens]

The X-Men are an extremely good metaphor for oppressed minorities until they are suddenly an extremely terrible metaphor for oppressed minorities.

[davidmann95]

The scale on which the first reply misses the point literally never ceases to awe me.

[lyricwritesprose]

I gotta say, though, this is a place where the X-men are being a good metaphor for oppressed minorities.  Specifically, in this case, the disabled community.

“Yay, there’s a cure!” says the girl with depression.  “Cure for what, motherfucker, I’m not sick,” says the person with autism.

“Yay, there’s a cure!” I say, with my fibromyalgia and random bad pain days.  “Yes, because it’s easier to talk about eliminating us than talk about teaching sign language in school,” says the Deaf person.  “‘Cure’ is violent rhetoric.”

The problem is, of course, that a vast number of things have been aggregated under the label of “disability,” and many of them don’t even resemble each other.  Depression sucks in an objective fashion, whereas autism is just a way of being (which, like many ways of being, may suck at some times, and generally sucks worse when not accommodated).  Similar deal with chronic pain versus the Deaf community.  These things really should not be grouped together, but they are.  And since they are grouped so haphazardly, they will often be at cross-purposes.

It is ridiculous, in the X-men universe, to classify all “mutants” as one group.  You have ridiculously powerful people with little downside, you have powerful people with a major downside, you have people with very limited powers but few drawbacks, you have people with limited powers and massive drawbacks, and that’s not even getting into other divisions, like whether you look like a baseline human all the time, part of the time, or none of the time.  “Realistically,” if you can apply that word to a fantasy universe, Storm and Rogue belong to completely different minorities which should require completely different approaches.  But society has grouped them under one umbrella, or forced them to group themselves for self-protection, and thus you have conversations like the one above.

So it’s actually not a bad take.  Mind you, the X-men have had bad takes, and will do so again, and I’m skeptical about whether “powers” of any kind even work for a metaphor about minority representation—but this particular vignette has something useful to say.

[listsoflifehacks]

Secret Recipes To Try At Home

[listsoflifehacks]

Here are the instructions since people keep asking!

Panera Mac N Cheese Wendy’s Frosty Olive Garden Alfredo Sauce Chick-Fil-A Nuggets Starbucks Frappucino P.F. Chang’s Chicken Lettuce Wraps Chick-Fil-A Frosted Lemonade Red Lobster Cheddar Biscuits Sonic Cherry Limeade

[people-are-garbage]

Holy fuck

[artorbust-deactivated20211111]

FUCK capitalism

Make you’re own goods, bitches

[recoil-operated-deactivated2021]

Recoil-operated’s $12 traditional mead:

So one of the most common things I see on my Mead posts is “I’d love to do that, but I don’t have the stuff”

We’ll sit down and buckle up. Because I’m about to show you how to make a $12.56 traditional mead.

Here’s the recipe:

1 gallon Deer Park/spring water. You don’t want distilled.

3 lb or 32 fluid ounces honey.

One package of yeast.

a party balloon.

The cost total is $13.49, but you only need one pack of yeast. So -$0.90.

Let’s begin:

Everything together on a clean work surface, you will need a clean glass. And while not entirely necessary, a measuring cup will be handy.

Pour a cup of water for yourself and drink it. Hydration is important. Also this will allow you headspace.

Remove about ehhhhh, a quart or so of water to drink later.

Trust me. You’re going to want it

Wash your drinking cup and mixing about a teaspoon of honey.

[recoil-operated-deactivated2021]

You have two options for yeast, that bread yeast we bought, or professional brewer’s yeast.

They’re both the same price. You can get brewers yeast off of Amazon.

I already have brewer’s yeast, so I’m using brewer’s yeast

Stick that in that honey water.

Stick your honey in some hot water.

Go outside. Breath the free air. Know what it is… To truely live.

Enough of that bitch. Honey’s hot. Put it in the water.

Put the water in the honey too.

Shake the sin out of it.

Put that stuff back in the big bitch.

[recoil-operated-deactivated2021]

Shake the sh*t outta it.

Hydrate yourself with the water you removed earlier.

Shank a balloon with a pin.

Add your yeasty honey water.

Balloon it.

Label it.

If your trad mead says anything racist, or anything positive about Hitler. Straighten that sh*t out.

And there you go. $12 (.56) traditional mead. Stick it somewhere dark and leave it alone for a while.

Shake the hell outta it once a day for the first four days. Then let it be until it’s clear.

[recoil-operated-deactivated2021]

Update:

Boozification has begun.

[yourunclejingo]

Lots of spices and herbs make for nice additions as well.

Good post.

[tehgore]

Who the hell are you to tell your sentient trad mead what to think?

[recoil-operated-deactivated2021]

I’m it’s creator. I have deemed racism to be sin.

[ean-sovukau]

AMEN

[closetedguyy]

why are rats a trans guy thing

[closetedguyy]

I think it’s important to note I’m not criticising it, before I knew (or accepted) I was trans I wanted rats so I think it’s an innate biological force.

[ourimportantthings]

Kinship

[thefibrodiaries]

Why is it our job as disabled people to educate our doctors on our conditions and tell the what medication, treatments and specialist referrals we need? Why do we have to research information before seeing a doctor if we want the right help? With the amount they’re paid shouldn’t they do their own damn research?

[eenymeenypia]

OMG THIS! WHAT OTHER PROFESSION WORKS LIKE THIS?  If you don’t know the answer, it’s your job to research it after I leave. And why do I have to come in and spring my information on you?  Why can’t I email you LIKE ANY OTHER PROFESSIONAL and say, I need to see you about this vitamin d research, AND THEN HAVE YOU RESEARCH IT AND BE PREPARED WHEN I WALK INTO MY APPOINTMENTS.

I don’t understand how they get away with this.  If it were any other professional, it would be unacceptable.  If you went to a lawyer and they were like, welp, I don’t know exactly about that but here’s my bill.  Come back when you have more information on what statutes I should look into, THAT LAWYER WOULD NOT HAVE A JOB!

[qjusttheletter]

the best part is we also have to pander to them. 

don’t use too many technical/medical terms - you’re a hypochondriac or you have munchausen’s, no legitimately ill/disabled person could possibly do extensive research. don’t make them feel inferior or ignorant - if you get on their bad side, your entire health care could be compromised. don’t get frustrated when they don’t know something - that’ll make them feel ignorant, see previous. 

we simultaneously have to be up to date on all the latest information re: conditions, symptoms, possible causes, etc, while letting our doctors feel like they’re doing a Good Job. 

[notsograndadventures]

Full offense, Doctors don’t deserve the pay they get. They don’t.

[hickorynut94]

Omg this.

[thisisableism]

It’s really scary that getting healthcare often depends on how well you balance pandering to them and presenting them the information. 

[nevertrustadoctorwho]

Never trust a doctor who gets frustrated with you for doing your own research.

[queerdo-mcjewface]

As a healthcare worker I fully endorse this message.

[chronicallymalingering]

This is so fucking funny, y'all are a bunch of whiners. Doctors know a lot of shit believe it or not and yet sometimes yes we have to look things up because we haven’t heard about it since medical school. We don’t deserve the pay we get? Fuck you, you have no idea what medical school and residency are like. You don’t know what being a doctor entails. Y'all need to STFU honestly, no wonder no doctors want to treat you.

[ourimportantthings]

Dude, as someone in medical school and someone that is chronically ill, shut up. Doctors know a lot and yet their patients still feel left out and even mistreated sometimes. I’ve had doctors literally call me crazy so many times for doing my own research even though I’m a doctor in training. No doctor should mistreat treat anyone. If you wouldn’t treat the people above, don’t be a doctor asshole.

[art-woonz]

Illustration Art By Aykut Aydoğdu

For more: artwoonz.com

[toastoat]

i just wish my parents would stop assuming I hate my body so much and just realize. Kevin Kline 1983 Pirates of Penzance

[toastoat]

just a reminder don’t bind w ace bandages and also any transmeds/truscum who look at this post will die in 7 days

[openblogtomyabusivemother]

A parent who has never apologized is a parent with damaged children.

All parents make mistakes and if they don't apologize, it wounds their children. Good parents apologize when they mess up.

[ourimportantthings]

My parents never apologised to anything because conflicts were just treated by being passive aggressive for a while, ignored and then forgotten...