Our Mind Speaks

I created this blog to speak my mind (hence the name) and to let my fellow minds speak theirs as well (hence the submit option). People are being oppressed left and right in this world, and many don't seem to know the concept of equality and freedom. Unless they do, unfortunately, blogs like mine have to exist, to tell them they're wrong.

[intersectionalpraxis]

[ourmindspeaks]

Got threatened for coming home late

Ugh...how did I even get into a situation like this? Did it happen over time that I failed to notice what was happening?

My "husband" threatened to "raise hell (basically)" if I ever come home later than 6 PM. 6!! And all that because my daughter and I went out to the mall, and came home at 7:30.

And before you ask me, no, it's not a school night. She's on vacation. I raise my daughter. I feed her, I entertain her, I teach her.

He's barely home, and he thinks he knows better.

And he thinks we're not allowed to have fun without him. He's such a narcissist.

For the first time in a long while, I let go, and played like a kid with my daughter. I felt alive. And somehow he knew that I guess, because he rained ALL over my parade.

I was raised better than this. I was raised to be strong, independent and confident. I've toured our city before marriage.

I keep thinking this: How did I get myself into a situation like this.

I know it's unfair to blame myself. I know I'm the victim here, but I just can't stop hating myself for being complacent. For getting duped.

For not working hard enough that stupid guys like these think they're better than me.

How did I get myself into a situation like this. Why? How?

And I also can't help thinking that it's high time I got out. This guy's dangerous and my parents are getting older, and with them, I'm slowly losing any support I ever had.

My daughter can't stay with this guy. I know she loves him and all, but he'll ruin her life, I just know it. He's too immature and too much of a narcissist to not turn his machinations on my daughter at the first sign of protest from her.

I can just imagine what her teenage life would be.

I want my daughter to be so much more than what this guy has planned for her.

I want myself to be so much more than what he says I am.

I want to create and run a multi-billion dollar company, and I want to give it to my daughter (if she wants it) so she can grow it to new heights.

I don't want our life to revolve around pleasing a guy who thinks a 32 year old woman is his to control (seriously, come home at 6??!! 6?!! What the fuck did I turn my life into).

[heterorealism]

[ourmindspeaks]

OMG, THIS IS SOOOO TRUE.

[ourmindspeaks]

I can't lose

Im 32 years old. I have a daughter who's midly autistic and can't afford to live in am environment where patriarchy thrives.

I don't know how I got myself into this mess, but I know it's high time I get out.

My country, and culture isn't very supportive of divorce (not at all), but what's the worse that could happen, huh?

My thoughts are jumbled, and I might not be mentally strong to do this at this moment, but I'll get there.

I barely remember the person I was, the dreams I had. Almost 7 years since marriage, and I'm unrecognizable.

I just know that, I can't let this be my life, my legacy. Not anymore.

I'll keep you guys updated.

[ourmindspeaks]

Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.

Martin Luther King Jr.

[ourmindspeaks]

Right? As if they’re going to carry the baby to full term AND help raise it after it’s born. 

As long as something someone else does doesn’t affect you, make sure you don’t butt your nose in. 

[ourmindspeaks]

Who are you? 

[ourmindspeaks]

Is your boyfriend homophobic?

That’s your first clue to dump his ass. 

I dated this guy a few years back. He was sooo sweet at the start. The best you can ever imagine. But he was homophobic from day one. Very vocal, and he always quoted religious quotes to justify his hate. 

Even though I didn’t agree with his views, I did try to let it go after some light banter and back and forth (which always ended in him vehemently defending his views). 

But the thing is, the root of homophobia is misogyny. People hate gay men because, according to them, they “are the receiver”, which is purely a woman’s role for them. A lesser role. 

So what happened? A few months down the road, he turned into a sexist asshole as well. Demeaning words when I went out alone. Hot and cold. Completely dismissive more than once. 

Boy am I glad that relationship came to an end.

So yeah girls, if a guy starts showing his homophobic colors, it’s time to say goodbye. 

I’d also be wary of him being a religious nut (everything should be done in moderation), because most religious books are NOT favorable to women If someone is a fanatic follower, they probably follow even the sexist parts of the religious teachings.

But homophobic? Complete no no.

[owl57]

What many men hate about women, is not that their are “receiver”, but rather that they act as passive object (well, one may say one‑way‑receiver‑not‑giver) and really want to stick with it (there is little hope the average women want to get out of this status). Gay men are far from this: it happens I’m accosted by gay men on “dating” websites, they are not at all passive unlike women are. They are able to read and write, something no women is able to. After what some explained me, on gay dating websites, there is not a side who pays for the other passive side sold as objects, there is equality, unlike what it is with the client‑merchandise relationship which is a characteristic of men‑“women” relationship.

Then, most of “women” hate men who wear anything even just slightly looking feminine (after arbitrary conventions), suggesting if they like it, there are probably gay. That said, 99.999% of women are misogynistic as much as they are mysandristic.

Don’t relate justified criticism of average (99.999%) “women” behaviours (justified criticisms the average women qualifies as misogyny) and homophobia. As an example, MGTOW guys don’t seems to be homophobic (even if I guess some probably are).

[ourmindspeaks]

I really have nothing much to say to this, other than that every line of your reply is total exaggeration and stereotyping, something the LGBT community also faces. 

 When one oppressed group starts throwing stones at another, we’ll never reach the equality we want. But I know not all gay guys have such low opinions on women, so I’ll just assume that you’re an ignorant exception. 

[overly-obsessed-fangirl1]

Stupid double standards and normalized sexism

I try to take the lead on a project I’m DIRECTOR for, because I want a good grade and a good final product, and I’m “bossy” and “too controlling” and need to “loosen up.” A male in the group takes charge on EVERY project (including this one), overstepping his bounds, and he’s just “determined,” a “team player” trying to do what’s best for the group. The kicker? Everyone on the team insists there’s no sexism at all here.

[ourmindspeaks]

Don’t let him take charge. As you said, you’re the director of the project. If you have to bulldozer all of them into submission, do it. People are just cowards who won’t follow up on their words. 

Bossy and too controlling? Ha! Those are their go-to phrases. If you’re in charge, you need to be bossy (read: leader). You can’t always be the team player. You can’t get anything done then.

If there are people who support you in your team, get them alone and get started on the project. Those assholes will fall in line soon, once they realize their grades depend on you. 

All the best dear! :) 

[overly-obsessed-fangirl1]

@ourmindspeaks thanks, but it’s over now. They decided roles are flexible and ignored me because a) I’m a girl and b) I’m youngest. Idjits. They’ll just never know how awesome we are

[ourmindspeaks]

Don’t worry. All idiots like those can do is whine. You’re still in school. By the time you get out of uni, you’d have polished your leadership skills enough to kick ass in your office space.Being bossy (having leadership qualities) is highly appreciated in companies. Ya sure, your employees might call you bossy behind your back, but that’s not gonna affect you. :)

[ourmindspeaks]

Hello to the anti-feminists in the feminism tag

Seriously, it’s an epidemic. I don’t find myself searching out MRA forums/tags. Why are you guys hanging out in the feminism tag, and then get seriously offended when we post something related to feminism? 

Seriously? That’s just immature.

A lot of you like replying to and reblogging my posts as well. But seriously, why would you hang out in a tag that does not welcome you? (confused). 

Or are you guys just trolls who are having fun at our expense? Guess I should go on a blocking spree lol. 

[ourmindspeaks]

I wanted to address this reply to my post:  My dad didn’t cry when his brother died

Frankly speaking, I didn’t post that because I wanted approval, or to support men or women. 

I posted that because I love my dad, plain and simple. 

Yes, mothers are not stressed, but fathers are too, and we sometimes forget that in our hate against men. Just look at your post. Don’t you have someone you love in your life too? 

Trust me, I hate oppression of women more than any other man, because I live in a culture where we’re still in the 1900′s in terms of women’s rights. 

I know how bad it is, more than anyone else. But that doesn’t mean I’ll hate my dad. Never. 

That was an encouraging post that was meant to let men into the feminism movement, and to let the women who hated the term “feminism” know that it’s not the bad thing they think it is. 

If you’re going to dissect every word and throw shade and hate at one of your own, go ahead. 

But I need to tell you that this is not how we’ll get ahead. Dissecting words isn’t the way to do things, but holding hands together in solidarity is. 

Divide and rule has been used by the conquerors against conquered minorities and women way too many times. I can’t believe we’re still criticizing each other over things, and I can’t believe you’ll post a reply like that over a VERY personal post. 

[novoprocaine-deactivated2023020]

Overwatch Rant

So here I am just minding my own business having fun in quick play. I’m playing Sombra and we win! It’s great woo-hoo but then some random finds out I’m a girl and immediately goes “oh that’s why you sucked lol”. We WON so it’s not like this man’s getting mad and blaming me he’s just going out of his way to an ass. It ruined the whole experience for me and made me not play the rest of the day. People like that are why I never do voice chat, because I’m afraid of how I’ll be treated just because of my gender.

Sorry for the rant just wanted to say that somewhere.

[ourmindspeaks]

I hope you virtually tore him a new one. Please tell me you did.

[citizenshipandsocialjustice]

Source unknown

[overly-obsessed-fangirl1]

Stupid double standards and normalized sexism

I try to take the lead on a project I’m DIRECTOR for, because I want a good grade and a good final product, and I’m “bossy” and “too controlling” and need to “loosen up.” A male in the group takes charge on EVERY project (including this one), overstepping his bounds, and he’s just “determined,” a “team player” trying to do what’s best for the group. The kicker? Everyone on the team insists there’s no sexism at all here.

[ourmindspeaks]

Don’t let him take charge. As you said, you’re the director of the project. If you have to bulldozer all of them into submission, do it. People are just cowards who won’t follow up on their words. 

Bossy and too controlling? Ha! Those are their go-to phrases. If you’re in charge, you need to be bossy (read: leader). You can’t always be the team player. You can’t get anything done then.

If there are people who support you in your team, get them alone and get started on the project. Those assholes will fall in line soon, once they realize their grades depend on you. 

All the best dear! :) 

[ourmindspeaks]

We often try to stop discrimination, by shaming the opposite group. E.g when talking about plus size positivity, you hear people talk about skinny people in a negative light. This has started skinny people to be discriminated against.

Rather than fighting discrimination with discrimination, why can’t we accept that we are all different and our uniqueness is a beauty in itself.

All body types are pretty. It’s your personality that makes you beautiful.

Submitted by http://happyhippogames.tumblr.com/

Edit from OMS: Beautifully said. Yes, let’s not throw one group under the bus just to uplift another one. As someone who gets thin shamed a lot, this is my request as well. 

[tikkunolamorgtfo]

This is why we march. This is why we fight.

[ourmindspeaks]

Oh my god, what the fuck?! I hope this post went viral on Facebook and his bosses see it. Dimwit. 

[serahne]

Pro tip to male writers who has no idea how to write female characters : we don’t spend our times comparing the size of our chest, putting the others down for not being as curvy or saying how ‘jealous’ we are of someone with a bigger chest. This is only happening in your obsessed-with-boobs-mind, sorry ( not sorry ).

Now if you want realistic discussion about it, complaining about backpain and how irritating a bra can be is something we do. Just throwing it there.

[ourmindspeaks]

Or how bras can actually he harmful if worn for too long. 

Lol, comparing boob sizes.