i was considering changing the original post from 29th march, but this got too long, so it's a new statement instead. i know i'm annoying, but i have no choice. we'll put up with it.
as some know, and most obviously haven't bothered to read, since the beginning of this year i've been in a conscious dnots period (it's related to twin flames), which for me reached partial depression (sometimes it's there, sometimes it's not). my case is probably unique (i hope i'm wrong here), since i have such "symptoms" before my physical meeting with him, accumulated over the years, and i'm afraid it's not just that (like getting to his possible identity?? /srs).
unfortunately, this period destroyed my desire for absolutely everything and i had to announce at the end of march that i couldn't do everything the way i used to. many things that i used to do with some desire (although not 100%) i now do with difficulty, including my content here and i try to do all sorts of things to be able to overcome this "depression", to be able to do the normal things that should be expected of me, but alas, i am not successful in most cases.
this means that i force myself to make content here. i understand that i "need to rest" and i agree, but my time is already ticking for such elementary things (like starting a job) and for me this realization burdens me much more than making the necessary content here. so in this case, with this "brand" i am "running away from reality", no matter how immature it may seem, because at least i feel bearable.
i realized that i felt obligated to do all the requests, and because of that, at the end of march, i made some desperately needed boundaries (this was for two weeks) so that i wouldn't feel overwhelmed:
i separated "requests" from "suggestions" because requests burden me;
i closed any opportunity to ask me questions about the most common topics i receive (in this case, everything k-pop) and did the rest of the questions i did anyway on joinperch;
i stopped answering ridiculous questions. i don't know what kind of people read my content, but no matter how much english you know, i couldn't stop wondering and not believing my eyes what stupid questions i've received within the years. to save unnecessary nerves and time, i decided not to answer everything like i used to (i still did it, but it was constructive over the months, but since then it has become definitive). and yes, i started blocking unnecessary criticism from anonymous people on tumblr. i've encountered a few since then.
during this period, i tidied up my masterlist, as it was extremely messy (to me...). many topics that i hadn't received questions about for a long time went to the archive posts (i even tidied up the archives themselves because of the 100 hyperlinks per post limit) so that i could ask about them on joinperch, and the rest i simply rearranged. however, there were still some people who were unhappy that "the links don't work", when they work for me? i even asked once which links don't work, to check if there really is a problem there… i'm still waiting for an answer.
since april 12th, i've been doing the following:
1) i've started accepting suggestions regardless of the topic, but not requests. some of you are still so stupid as to make a simple difference between two words;
2) i mentioned that i absolutely do not accept questions that require me to answer within x period. some people have not bothered to read it because i still get questions about comebacks, although less frequently. the fact that i mainly make such posts lately is a separate issue. this is my decision;
3) i do not update the "waiting room" (google doc) so as not to stress myself out;
4) i still do not answer ridiculous questions. i delete them without thinking;
5) i continue to block anonymous people when i receive pointless criticism.
since then, i have only broken down once and made a mental breakdown post in which i still cannot understand you (but it's my issue, lol). i deleted it after a few weeks because it was a moment of weakness on my part, and i hate to show it in this way.
the only thing i want from this small group of people (how many, i have no way of knowing) who really don't understand is to get into the situation and understand that if certain boundaries (including rules) are violated, you will either be blocked or you will not receive a response. i'm not specifying topics. i'm speaking in general. i know that i used to be more abrupt with my responses (i don't deny it), but understand that on the other side, in some cases, you are as inadequate as i was.
therefore, there are no changes to whether my requests are opened or not. suggestions for tumblr are accepted, and everything (including things in the archives) that is for joinperch becomes a request and goes there. this is generally not subject to discussion or other criticism, since i was unable to find a site similar to curiouscat (which is now closed) in 2024.
for youtube, things remain on hold at this stage. i have a few questions that i haven't uploaded from there yet - for cortis and for heeseung, but they can be postponed over time. i don't rule out a complete rebrand there after a while, but to subliminals, since i was considering that too.
i was considering starting to make astrological content again through lacoonawalk, but at this stage i'm giving up on that thought, since most of my astrological books are somewhere else (well... the countryside) due to the renovation at home. i still don't have a wardrobe and a bed (i only sleep on a mattress :D).
for this side blog that i was thinking of making (if you saw the post from the 30th, great, if not, click here) about spirituality, i'm waiting to see if there are 15 answers left, or if they increase, and then i can decide.
for paid readings, i might start this summer. i fixed my stripe last year anyway. i'll decide how to adjust the prices, financially bulgaria is exactly as bad as i expected.
so, i don't know what i'm going to do with my life at all, but i think i'll find a solution. i just need time. hopefully i'll need a little of it.
to the majority who understand me and respect my mental health, i'm so grateful. it means more than you can imagine.
i'm always here for side conversations if you want.
with gratitude to those who have shown understanding of my mental health and neutrality to those who don't get into my mental health situation, Li
old statements 12/04, 29/03