VVitch of the plateau

I was a cunt once but the vampir economy is in shambles, she/they/2Xyo, queer AF

[jayne6-deactivated20250211]

[dragon-in-a-fez]

I just witnessed a fucking murder

[tough-girl9]

I love how it’s unclear if Data has any idea whatsoever that he just murdered Worf.

And the decisive little head nod at the end before he walks off - like, yup, I just solved that problem, good for me.

[unicorn-and-bluebells]

I also love the way that when Data says “You share all of those qualities in abundance!” Worf just looks up like

[dragon-in-a-fez]

this is the absolute best thing you could have added to my post, thank you, I have been laughing at comparing Worf’s face to this cat for ten minutes

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

A M A Z I N G

[spaghettihell]

Reblog to hug prev

Please

[awakefor48hours]

Every once in a while, I wish the friendship meter from the Sims was real so that way when people tell me "I used Chat-GPT" they can visually see just how much respect I just lost for them in that moment.

[berkelbites]

One time an acquaintance told me she entered Snape's star chart into chatgpt and I could physically feel that meter dropping three separate times over the course of her sentence

[tonysopranoproskater69420]

thanks tvtropes I can always count on you to gas me up

[6mayhem]

mr. substance abuser has a suggestion for how we should spend the afternoon

[quinnactually]

that's MS. substance abuser to you

[6mayhem]

sorry women sorry sorry sorry you can kick me really hard in the head

[markv5]

Вставай, скоро молоко раздавать будут!…

[sergeantbabylegs-deactivated201]

[ranma-official]

the translation is significantly more Soviet in tone than the original, which is great

[hazard-symbols-that-fuck-hard]

hate it when i’ve almost 100%-ed my water and the waitress comes over to reset my progress

[spacezombiez]

Apparently got a bit too tipsy at my sister in law’s bridal shower this afternoon and then took a four hour nap on the couch 🫠

[fuckedelf]

Im giving creepy blowjobs now & they keep telling me they want just the normal ones

[decody-deactivated20230217]

THE TWILIGHT ZONE 2.29 — The Obsolete Man

[puthy]

[thehandsomedevil88]

Still not what I want

[puthy]

What is it that you desire?

[guooey]

themessangerpigeons

[guooey]

Tears

[nevver]

“He is always on the brink of suicide … because he seeks salvation through the routine formulas suggested to him by the society in which he lives.” — Umberto Eco on Charlie Brown

[porcelain-dollbones]

snakes really make you appreciate how gross mammals really are. squamates are very dry and clean

[porcelain-dollbones]

a bird is a kind of reptile that has learned to be yucky.

[winonaparadise]

i see a curved penis and i want to fix that shit. it's not that it's gross i just bet an hour in a bench vice would make that shit shoot straight. i wanna comically spin the handle and wrench it tight with the skill of a shop teacher that's been doing this for years. safety goggles on. heavy duty gloves. op! be careful of the clenching back there. that's how Ms. Paradise lost a pinky in college.

[winonaparadise]

I suppose this exposes my ignorance and inexperience. I suggest we normalize the use of the penis vice so that we can curve and straighten cocks to our own unique tastes. They can be 3D printed with an aposable skeleton so that they can be curved. I have included a mockup down below.

[transhumanisticpanspermia]

op i regret to inform you that the curve is so inherent that it persists even when you flip it inside out, turn it into a vagina, and stick a ramrod straight dilator into it for 30 minutes 4 times per day for several months.

(they don't usually give you an MRI 4 months after bottom surgery, i just happened to need one for unrelated reasons)

[winonaparadise]

girl why is your pussy trying to take me on the road less traveled. fucking that thing i hear google maps say "exit left." trying to hit your spot but your pussy said that's not part of the guided tour. your shit is so twisted the people's joker took it to her doctor saying "like this please." I KNOW she WILL be comin around the mountain when she comes! i always wanted a girl who turned heads, but this is ridiculous!!!

[kendrawells]

Chil got it for him