blogy blog blog

Reblogging random crap since 2013 Formerly a-crap-blog and other terrible URLs

[dankmemeuniversity]

[kajbsdfhgioigjhfdsahjsid]

me bathing my dog: ohhhhh does she like the water!!! is it waaarrrm!!! ooooo shes gonna be so cleeeaaaan shes a clean little goorrrl gonna smell so goooood!!!!!

my dog in the tub looking like a sad wet rat:

[hennuswennus]

yall i just found the funniest thing on the harry potter wiki

[lotstradamus]

#happy birthday to an eyelid bestowing legend

[glumshoe]

imagine that you’re a Jedi Knight and you just got assigned your very first padawan and you go to meet them and it’s just... a fucking barrel full of sand with a force-sensitive baby sarlacc in it

[glumshoe]

That’s even funnier because imagine you’re a young padawan hoping your favorite Jedi will pick you as their apprentice, but you’re skimmed over and they pick your roommate instead. Your roommate, who is a fucking baby sarlacc in a bucket.

[eldritchcameo]

I kinda had to draw it. 

[glumshoe]

I... the padawan braid... I’m so glad....

[maculategiraffe]

me, reaching into my dresser drawer for black pants: I hope this isn’t the pair with big holes worn in the inner thighs

Marie Kondo, gently over my shoulder: why is a pair of pants you find unwearable still in your dresser drawer

me: oh shit that’s right!! The dresser is for clothes that under some circumstance I might conceivably wear!!

Marie Kondo, beaming proudly: Yes, that’s correct!! These pants must have been your favorites. How wonderful that they were so comfortable and practical that you wore them out. But now since they no longer function as pants, you should move them from the drawer where you keep your functioning pants!

me: Yes thanks I got it they’re in the fabric basket now

Marie Kondo, fading back into the darkness: I love what you’ve done with the kitchen!!

[cwicseolfor]

The notion of KonMari as some creepy semi-embodied but entirely benevolent spirit, like a well-intentioned Bloody Mary, is so perfect and wonderful.

[essoreese]

Marie Kondo has the same powers but the exact opposite energy of the Duolingo Owl.

[strangelyregular]

YES.

Marie Kondo: Your room isn’t very clean, but that’s okay, I love mess! Does this spark joy?

Duolingo Owl: I wrote the ransom note in Spanish, and if you have to use Google Translate to read it, your kid gets it. You broke your streak. I’ll break your neck.

[ace-pervert]

Marie Kondo holding your child, while standing on the remains of the Duolingo Owl : The Bird did not spark joy

[nerdjpg]

What’s with the obsession with calling food or recipes “better than sex”…I tried your pintrest risotto Sharon and frankly I’m wondering if your needs are being met

[taur]

[kevinokevinokevino-deactivated2]

[cheaphalloweencostume]

im useless because i dont own this shirt

[cheaphalloweencostume]

just scrolled past this post on my own dash 100% not realizing i had posted it and i was like “oh fuck i need that shirt”

[stevienick]

stranger things season three + the onion headlines

[heartofdevastation]

[outlanderalien]

James Bond Franchise: What if we cast a black man as the next 007? Or maybe even a woman?

Nasty Fan-boys: No! that would ruin the franchise!!! Don’t you DARE.😠😠😠

James Bond Franchise: ………………………Anyway,

[anxietyproblem]

[oak23]

We forgot about it

[dickheaddutch]

[valilihapiirakka]

I once signed up to participate in a study on how depression affects memory, forgot I was meant to go do it, and when I emailed to apologise to the PhD student running it she basically told me that a) she was very used to this happening and b) the weird irony of her theories’ correctness making it very difficult to arrange proving them had by now gone from infuriating to hysterical

[fuckyeahasexual]

So while most rainbow capitalism is sticking rainbows on things and pretending to be an ally, Budweiser’s UK branch is giving credit to trans activists, and explaining pride flag colors.

[worthlessstreetrat]

[goobra]

this is honestly how some of y’all sound

[sourlemonblue]

officer, that’s my emotional support two-liter of vodka lemonade

[baptizm-deactivated20200524]

Some of us??? Drink and drive??? To cope????

[slopaganda]

we can discourse about childrens cartoons for decades but you gotta admit it was kinda galaxy brained when atla decided there were no whites on the planet

[devilcroc]

the biggest questions detective pikachu answered

no one but professional trainers has a full team of 6 in the pokemon universe because it would be a fucking gigantic hassle to deal with 6 animals, let alone different types that need different things

some people don’t evolve their pokemon because imagine having a fucking cat and then you can choose to make the cat five times as big and strong. would you do this if you weren’t battling.

[sindri42]

Technically if your cat isn’t battling it doesn’t evolve.

That does however give cat owners a strong incentive to not let their cat outside, because realistically any cat that is allowed to roam free is gonna rack up exp until it evolves.

[such-justice-wow]

I let my litten out one day and a week later incineroar rips my door off and demands wet food only