i‘m putting the ring series on hold permanently, instead focusing on more diverse projects/ideas that don‘t force me into a single string of events already predetermined by myself 2 years ago. maybe i‘ll continue it someday, but someday is not today.
content: fluff, poly relationship, follows the story of twow (somewhat), arguing, daddywari glazing toruk makto, light injury (nothing serious), not proofread, contains na‘vi words
summary: you disagree on tonowari‘s decisions to let jake sully and his family stay.
dictionary:
- "'ak!" -> ow!
- "kehe!" -> no!
- "yawntu" -> love (term of endearment)
- "sevin" -> pretty (term of endearment)
"our son ao‘nung and our daughter tsireya will show your children what to do."
not only ao‘nung‘s head turned to tonowari, but yours too. you gave him a disapproving look, but ao‘nung took it further, wanting to protest, but his father shut him down immediately, **"it is decided."**
later that day, in your, tonowari‘s and ronal‘s shared marui, as you were cooking food, waiting for ronal to return from tsahìk duties, you argued with tonowari about it.
"other children from the clan could‘ve taught them as well. if not even better."
"you‘re saying our kids are bad teachers?" tonowari replied to you, his eyes looking up from where he was sharpening his spear,
"they have a lot to learn."
"and how will they do that if they‘re not supposed to teach?"
you sighed in annoyance, already on edge since the unexpected arrival of jake sully on your shores earlier that day, which wasn‘t really to your liking. but as tonowari and ronal agreed, it was 2 to 1, and that meant you were overruled.
"you know what i mean. rotxo can teach. he‘s teached the smallest of children and the eldest of the elderly. or koro. or-"
"rotxo can teach them fishing later. and koro… he will only teach these forest kids mischief. if i may say so."
"just because he‘s from a family full of fishers doesn‘t mean he can only fish. i see him as quite the promising hunter."
the intensity with which you were cutting the vegetables for tonight‘s dinner increased, as did your agitation with your husband‘s continued arguing.
"that was not-… look, our kids learnt from the best-"
"praising yourself. wow," you interjected.
"-and they will manage these kids. trust me."
"we don‘t know what associating with jakesully will bring to our clan… death, if we‘re lucky."
"toruk makto will protect us if we stand by his side. not if we stand against him. then we will be doomed for certain. unless eywa provides a miracle to our people." tonowari had now set his spear aside and walked behind you while you were still cutting vegetables.
him breathing into the crook of your neck, a love-hate-relationship it was. right now, it was pure hatred. you couldn‘t concentrate.
"i still do not like this. what if their son - the reckless one - was to get them into a fight with an akula, what then?"
"didn‘t know toruk makto had a reckless son."
"i noticed before he even set foot here he would be trouble, tonowari. the one who ogled tsireya? with his hair gone on one si- 'AK!"
he and his damn breathing into your neck made you lose focus, and then, your finger was bleeding from a cut. not deep, but nothing to just shrug off either.
"let me-"
"kehe!"
"…"
you grabbed a cloth and wrapped it around the cut. you‘d wash it off later. you made a mental note to it.
"you surely need no-"
"i said i don‘t." you grumbled under your breath. now you were pissed, partially at him, partially at you for losing focus, and partially at ronal for leaving you alone with him (although she couldn‘t do anything about it).
"let me finish those." he didn‘t wait for a response, just gently maneuvered you out of the cooking area by your hips and took over cutting the rest of the vegetables. and all that to no protest.
as the night progressed, you found yourself having to accept that no amount of grumpiness towards tonowari will make him change his mind. at a certain point, it was just an act to seem like you wouldn’t fold if he put on that one face (the one where he‘s convincing ronal to let the sullies stay non-verbally) he knew made you (and ronal) fold instantly.
"maybe it is not too bad our kids gather experience in teaching others," you finally agreed, which made a little smirk appear on tonowari‘s face.
"you thought it was?" ronal asked. obviously, she wasn‘t there to witness the argument, and apparently, neither you nor tonowari had felt the need to revisit it.
"foolishly, i did."
"didn‘t know you could bite back like a thanator, yawntu," tonowari comments.
"surely more like a thanator cub," ronal corrected, earning a subtle nod from you and an expression that said 'this woman reads me like a damn book'.
"and what are you, sevin?“ tonowari asked ronal, he already started to get fussy (like a baby), since he was the only one already ready for bed.
"going to bed, tonowari. we‘re all going to bed. it has been a long and exhausting day," she replied.
"one thanator cub, coming right up to bed," you said as you dropped down beside tonowari, ronal following shortly after.
I need an Avatar life sim. I want to choose my clan and live in a tree or some shit. I wanna live in harmony with the People and go hunting and foraging. I want to weave baskets and fly an Ikran and fall in love. I want to have little blue babies that I sing to and tell them stories and teach them about Eywa.
notes: I‘M SORRY I LEFT YOU FOR SO LONG BUT THE RING IS BACK!
“wh-what do you mean ‘she left’? she cannot leave!” neteyam said.
tsireya sighed, “i get that it‘s not ideal neteyam, but you have to understand, she just needs time to herself!”
“oh yeah, so she goes back to high camp, so that she can be with tarsem? behind my back?” neteyam spat back, anger and jealousy visible in his expression.
“you know she would never do that! and even if she did, you have no ‘claim’ over her! you two are… yeah, what even are you two?” she said, stepping closer to neteyam, now being just a foot or two away from him, “are you together? are you friends? are you enemies? WHAT ARE YOU TWO?“
“i don’t know what we are! if she‘d just said anything, spoken to me about it! the only way that-”
tsireya interrupted him by grabbing onto his shoulders, maintaining a firm grip although she had to reach up a bit, “dont you realize that she cannot deal with this? i get you‘re trying to be understanding and all but she needs to be alone! and besides, do you think tarsem could bag her? really? when she knows when she comes back you are waiting for her? no way!”
neteyam raised his voice, “she won‘t come back if i don’t fly after her! i need to bring her ba-”
“SHE WILL COME BACK!” she interrupted him. after taking a deep breath, she continued, “she will come back, neteyam. for you, for tuk, for her. alright? you need to give her space, because the less space you give her, the more time she will need to come back, alright?”
he nervously ran a hand over his face, “alright… alright… i get that…” there was silence for a few seconds until he spoke up again, “how will i tell mom and dad, tho? they‘ll be so angry, they’ll never accept her back…”
tsireya groaned, “they will, they have to… and even if they don’t, we will. i promise that.”
your ikran landed on the soft sand with a loud thump. you prayed to eywa that, unlike when you first arrived, there wouldn’t be a crowd of teal na‘vi surrounding you, but the metkayina were curious na‘vi, curious to how you changed after your 4 months long absence.
and change, you did.
you had trained, every day, becoming a better warrior day by day. under the leadership of tarsem, you had led the omaticaya through many battles, always staying by his side.
you would lie if you said you hadn’t grown to appreciate him even more than you already had, and also kind of missed him right now.
the way he would be extra patient with you, if you couldn’t complete an assignment instantly, (which you mostly did and expected of yourself) he would wait. just look at you,
trying over and over again, until you got it right.
they eyed you up, the new pieces you wore, the scratches on your arms and face and the new beads braided into your hair.
it was refreshing, hearing the water behind you, seeing the maruis and their intricate designs. you thought the omatikaya were good weavers, but how they weave these huts that look like they’re defying geometry never got into your head.
your thoughts were interrupted by a slightly shorter na‘vi hugging you tightly, “y/n! you‘re back! oh, thank you, great mother!”
the voice, the way they threw themselves around you, yes, this could only be one person, and one person only.
“tsireya!” you exclaimed, while returning the hug, “how did you get here so fast?”
she ignored your question and kept hugging you, “i knew you would come back, i knew it! oh eywa, tuk will be so happy, nete- neytiri will be overjoyed! you cannot imagine, they missed you so much, and-”
you pulled back to look at her and interrupt her, “okay, okay, mawey, tsireya!” you said while chuckling.
and just before you two had pulled away from each other, another set of hands was at your body, this time at your thigh, encircling it.
“tuk! come here!” you said while laughing. you picked her up and hugged her tightly, like you had promised when you left.
she let go of your thigh and threw her hands around your neck, nuzzling her head into the crook of it, “y/n, y/n, y/n! youre back! i missed you soooooooo much!”
“i promised i would hug you very tight, and here i am, having fulfilled that promise, haven’t i?” you said while rubbing circles in her back subconsciously.
“y/n, mom has been waiting for you every day, we need to go to her! she will be so happy!” she exclaimed.
you turned to tsireya apologetically, “see you later, alright?” which she nodded to
you and tuk cut through the crowd towards her family‘s marui, many na‘vi nodding in respect to you and your battle stories they had heard from others, who heard from others, and so on.
when you were past the crowd, tuk jumped out of your hold and ran towards your family‘s marui, “mom, dad! y/n is back! y/n is finally back!”
as you entered the marui, you couldn’t help but be scared, you were gone for 4 months and hadn’t even told them in person. you felt ashamed, having ran away from your problems, rather than solving them, but you thought that was the right thing to do.
neytiri hugged you, almost instantly after you entered, “my child! you have come back!” she said, simultaneously shedding a tear, “i have missed you… oh, child!”
jake stood up and came up to you, laying a hand on your back, “y/n. welcome back.”
and just as neytiri pulled away, another person hugged you tightly. you took in their scent and all tension faded from your body. you finally felt home, in his embrace. in neteyam’s embrace.
there was awkward silence between you two. you two sat on the beach, just staring into the distance. you and neteyam had each been wanting to say something, had a lot of questions on your mind. and one specific question lingered in his mind.
what were you? what were you two?
and he couldn’t let that question bother him any more. it had lingered in his mind for the last 4 months, 4 painful, agonizing months.
“y/n.” he finally managed to croak out, the lump in his throat growing bigger by the second.
you looked at him, surprised he actually said something, “oh, uhh, yeah?”
he took a deep breath before speaking, “what are we? are we friends? are we ‘siblings’? are we… still a thing?”
you huffed shortly, “how am i supposed to know? i was gone for 4 months, i changed, you probably did too, so how am i supposed to know if we still fit together?”
“y/n, all i did in those 4 months was wait for you, long for you. i didn’t change a bit, because i did nothing else beside wait. i just looked at the sky all day, looking if i saw your ikran, finally returning. i wanted to follow you, bring you back, but tsireya kept me from it. look, i can understand if you’re unsure about us or anything, but just know, as long as i can see you every day, i’ll wait until you are ready… whenever that may be.”
you were too stunned to speak, you hadn’t expected him to open up to you like that, not after you had left him for months, not after you hadn’t told him anything about you leaving.
“y/n, please talk to me… just say if you would ever want to be with me… talk, please.”
“nobody accepts us, neteyam. no one. no one besides lo‘ak and tsireya,” you said, while looking up at the sky, “i cannot look into your parents faces the same way i did before all of this.”
he shifted, so that his kneecaps touched yours and leaned in as he spoke, “i want to call you all those pretty names again, y/n,
paskalin, tanhi, yawne, tiyawn, yawntutsyì-”
“eywa, stop calling me that… please,” you stopped him, holding up a hand to gesture for him to stay quiet.
neteyam was silent, not making a sound, even his breathing had quieted down.
“i‘m not doing anything without jake and neytiri accepting the child, the child they thought of as their own daughter, being with their eldest son, neteyam. i cannot put that upon them,“ you said in a stern tone, your gaze still on the vast ocean laid out in front of awa‘atlu.
he sighed, “fine, then we‘ll talk to them, now.”
“now?”
“now. come along.”
“no, y/n. it‘s against tradition, against mating practices. neither us, nor tonowari and ronal will allow it,” jake said in a tone, leaving just a little room for argument, which you decided to keep in mind.
“but sir, i-”
jake sushed neteyam with a dismissive wave of his hand, shooting him a dangerous glare.
“is it you, who broke the mating traditions with neytiri, who‘s telling me to uphold them?” you begun, but jake chimed in again, “we are not having this conversation again, y/n! it is final!”
“do i have to leave for four months again, jake? is this the only way you can see your mistakes? your double standards?”
“you will not leave again, we are responsible for you and-”
“maybe it is the only way you will be considerate of my feelings!” you shouted, and ran out, about to jump on your ikran again, when a hand grasped your wrist.
you turned to see neteyam, holding your wrist tightly. he stared in your eyes, so deep you were sure he could see your soul.
“you‘re staying.”
“neteyam, i-”
„no. i am not enduring that pain again. anything i can do to keep you here, i will do, because i made the mistake to let you go once, and i will not make it again. i cannot make it again.”
you almost teared up at his heartfelt statement, and were about to say something when he instead spoke up, “these four moons have been a pain i thought i would die from, okay? i… fuck, please, just think about us for a second. please. we can only be with each other, okay? we can only defend and stand against their intolerance together, not when we‘re apart. it will only work that way. so, please, don‘t give us up again. you know i cannot take it.”
you were stunned by his determination to keep you here, it was endearing to see that he was really scared, for the first time you‘d ever seen.
“neteyam…” you only managed to croak out before falling into his arms and starting to cry miserably. you felt so miserable, so egotistical your desire to be accepted, and that it overshadowed you and his bond, the bond unmistakably there and present. you felt so sorry, and the only thing you could do, is sob out apologies to him.
jake and neytiri, witnessing this, had experienced a change of mind, seeing you sob in his arms, him shielding you from everything he could, you were in good arms, in his arms, and it soothed them, somehow. maybe, this bond wasn‘t all too bad to consider accepting.
“you‘re mating in a few weeks? so soon? you‘ve hardly been together for five months,“ you say to tsireya and lo‘ak, who invited you and neteyam to their shared (taking it slow overrated) hut.
“hey, y/n, my parents didn‘t even take 3 months to wait until they mated, soooo…” lo‘ak remarked.
“3 months? how come you‘d never told me your parents made the bond that fast, lo‘?” tsireya asked him, playing hurt that lo‘ak kept this very important fact from her, “it took my parents 4 years of relationship until they finally mated!”
“4 years? that‘s crazy!”
“yeah, i know, right y/n?”
“yeah, you‘re both right, i think me and neteyam could never wait four years, could we?“
“i would wait for eternity if at the end i could have you,” he says with a grin on his face, which get‘s even wider at your answer.
“you know that eternity has no end, right?”
“but you get the message,” he replies.
“i do, yes.”
“you know, y/n? we should think about mating soon too,” neteyam suddenly drops after a few seconds of silence.
“what? this soon?”
“if you‘re not ready, y/n-”
“that‘s a challenge? you know i can‘t resist a challenge.”
“oooh, if it‘s like that, then yes. it is a challenge.”
“challenge accepted.”
———weeks pass———
you knew it wasn‘t an easy ask, especially to ask your best friend something like that. but you had to know if she was willing to do this.
“reya?“ you ask as you enter tsireya‘s and lo‘ak‘s marui.
“huh? ah, y/n!” her voice calls out from a curtained off part of the marui, and just seconds after, she comes out.
“reya, you‘re-… wow… gorgeous as always. i suppose this is your new top?”
“it is, good you noticed it. i was a little concerned it looked to alike with my iknimaya top, but good you can tell the difference.”
“so, umm… i meant to ask something of you… like… like a big ask…”
synopsis. tonowari had just granted jake sully and his family uturu with your clan, but you were anything but happy, or welcoming.
word count: 520
warnings/tags: angst, family death
music: 'til we die
na'vi translations: yawne - beloved; uturu - sanctuary, place of refuge; tsahìk - (a clans spiritual leader); ma [name] - my [name];
notes: just a little drabble for y'all while i'm procrastinating
“yawne, you need to calm down, you know stress is not good for the child.” tonowari said as he laid one of his large teal hands onto your slightly pertruding belly.
you huffed in annoyance. jake sully, the man who had brought the sky people against his clan one time already, had just been taken in by your mate, tonowari and your clan. although saying you didn’t like the idea of him staying with your clan would’ve been an understatement, you had to grant him and his family uturu.
uturu, a concept said to be created by the great mother herself for those who cannot live in their home anymore and seek to keep themselves and their loved ones safe- that’s why it’s not greatly liked if the message spreads, that a clan has refused uturu to brothers and sisters from another clan.
uturu’s purpose was to be granted, and you knew it.
but you couldn’t help feel a pang of anxiety in your chest, which seemed to break through your hard and stern exterior you’d tried to keep up throughout all of this, since your mate wrapped his strong arms around you, holding you tight, but not too tight, so that he wouldn’t hurt your unborn.
“ma y/n… i know you’re not fond of this, but you, as tsahìk should know we cannot deny uturu,” he spoke in a gentle voice, gently saying those words into your ear while keeping you close.
“i know, i know… i’m just so damn scared…”
“i will make sure you and our children are safe, my love. i promise.”
“and you?”
silence ensued. tonowari was caught off guard by your question, but not surprised you worried for his safety as well. when he spoke, he did so in a soothing manner, “i have survived so many things yawntu, i-”
you cut him off by slightly pulling away and speaking a bit louder than before, “you’re not invincible, my love.”
“i am not… but i will keep us safe. i won’t let anything come near us.”
“you cannot endanger yourself, ma tonowari… i cannot lose you as well,” you said, while looking at him with a pleading expression.
your voice was quiet, weak, but most of all, scared and anxious, and he knew it was not good for you or the child. he pulled you closer again, just so close that he could hold you and feel the slight bump in your belly, resting your face against his broad chest, “you will not lose me, ma‘ muntxate. never.”
“the demons… they took my mother, my father, my sister… my dignity… they almost took me from you as well, ma tonowari…”
his breath caught in his throat as he heard you repeating what happened on that fateful day 19 years ago, “don’t think too much about it, alright? you cannot change the past… i am here, with you. always.”
you looked at him again, your eyes close to tears, “i cannot lose you too.”
he laid his forehead against yours, “you will not,” he reassured as he placed a gentle kiss on your forehead.
thank you for reading! it's just a little drabble i had the urge to write but i still hope you appreciate it. the ring pt. 4 coming somewhat soon, i'm working on it, promise!
synopsis. the RDA came back to high camp, and launched their biggest attack since they invaded the hallelujah mountains. you and tarsem are in the middle of the battle, and have to separate.
wc: 1.3k
warnings: angst, mentions of grave injury, describing said grave injury, character death
translations: yawne - beloved; oe tiyawn nga - i love you; yawntutsyìp - darling; oe tiyawn nga nìhawng - i love you too; ma‘ muntxate - my wife; ma‘ muntxatan - my husband
notes: EVEN MORE TARSEM LOVE 💗 💞💝💓💖💘
your ikran soared through the air, so much faster than the bulky flying machines the sky people used. right beside you was your mate, tarsem, whose face you had painted his face with war paint just an hour ago.
this was the sky people’s biggest attack on the omatikaya since they went all out war against jake sully, toruk makto. that was the past, history and many years ago.
“we‘re gonna have to split up here, yawne,” tarsem said, which made your heart break already. you two were inseparable, you wouldn’t want to leave him, even if it was just for one minute, for any amount of glory and praise in the world.
you sighed, looking at the skies, “whatever happens to any one of us, never forget that oe tiyawn nga so damn much,” you said, as you replayed the moment he kissed your forehead back in high camp in your head, over and over again.
“i will never forget, yawntutsyìp. oe tiyawn nga nìhawng, my love.” he said, as his ikran slowly increased his distance from you, “don’t forget you have your emergency whistle if anything happens to you!”
a tear fell down your cheek as you were separated from him, you already couldn’t take it, the distance between you was so short, yet you knew that you couldn’t follow him.
—————
“please tell me you saw tarsem, vin‘txa.” you said to one of the warriors who was with tarsem almost all the time.
“y/n, i didn’t. sorry,” he said, which made you sigh in response.
“fuck it, i‘m gonna find him,” you said, standing up from the mat in the tsahìk‘s hut.
vin‘txa held you back from leaving, “you‘re staying here y/n, he‘ll come back so-”
you hissed at him and shoved him away, “i‘ll go!”
vin‘txa was stunned at your sudden outburst of anger and stepped back, “please, y/n, take care of yourself.”
you walked out without a comment, mounting your ikran and flying off.
—————
“tarsem? tarsem?” you exclaimed, searching for you mate, in the deep of the pandoran jungles desperately.
you kept searching, but didn’t find a single clue or sign of him. it felt like an eternity you were searching for him, although it had only been a few minutes.
and then, you spotted his ikran, lying on the ground. was it dead? injured? but more importantly, where was tarsem?
you dismounted your ikran, running to tarsem‘s ikran, seeing it was injured, “bea‘nia!” you exclaimed.
while you were looking at the ikran‘s injuries, you heard a soft whisper from behind you, “ma‘ muntxate…”
you swiftly turned around, to see tarsem lying on the ground, badly injured, “ma‘ muntxatan!”
as you ran over to him, you noticed his injuries looked very severe, deep cuts, purple bruises and shooting injuries. as you drove your hands over his body, they were almost instantly covered with blood, “no, no, no! stay with me, please!” you said, just before blowing your emergency whistle around your neck, calling for assistance.
you just prayed to eywa that at least one person would hear you, just one. that they would come here and save your mate, the love of your life.
you started crying as you kept telling him to stay, to look at you, to walk away from the light, to just keep holding on to you.
his bloodied hand reached up to cup your chin, his thumb gently stroking across it, “oe tiyawn nga, ma‘ muntxate…”
you laid your hand onto his, hating that the blood on his hand kept his skin from actually feeling your cheek and vice versa.
“please… don‘t let go of my hand… ever…” you said, as he took your hand into his, leaving a bloodied handprint on your face.
he smiled weakly, “i won’t… i promise…”
you kissed his forehead, lingering there to savor the feeling of his skin against your lips.
his grip loosened, the light and life faded from his eyes, and his breathing stopped.
“no, no, no, no!”
you blew your whistle, so powerful your cheeks could’ve burst.
you could only think of one thing… please, oh great mother, send help… please, great mother… please, please, please.
—————
your sheets were wet, no, drenched from your sweat. all of your senses didn’t work, you couldn’t see, heat, smell, feel or speak. you panted heavily, you felt like you could breathe in all of pandora’s air with half of a breath.
your skull pounds, so hard you could’ve sworn your eyes were almost popping out of their sockets. the feeling of intense soreness dominated your body. you couldn’t move, even if you wanted to, you were caught in your sweaty-ass sheets.
you groaned in agony, or at least you tried. your throat was dry, and you were unable to get your vocal cords to make any sound.
you just laid there, doing nothing… it looked like you were staring at the ceiling from the outside, but your vision was so blurred, you could only catch glimpses of the many colors present in your hut.
„y/n?” a voice you couldn’t make out callef through the emptiness of your deafness.
you wanted to move, to see who was talking, to protect yourself, to hopefully finally gain your senses back.
the person now gently shook your limp, unmoving body, “y/n? your eyes are open, talk to me! i know i-” from that point on, everything was just blurry, as your eyes slowly closed.
was this it? was your time gone? why?
—————
it felt like a matter of seconds until a voice and it‘s sounds clearly came through to your eardrums, “y/n? y/n! she‘s awake!” the voice called out.
as you slowly opened your eyes, which were still foggy, a trembling pair of hands cupped your face and kissed you.
“she‘s still weak, so just… care for her as good as you can… she can only move if for very, VERY important things, alright?” a voice you recognized as mo‘at‘s said to another person, who apparently was the one cupping your face.
the other person sighed in relief, and as you recognized their voice, your heart skipped a beat, literally.
“yes i will take good, very good care of her…” the person promised.
“m-ma‘ muntxatan? you… you…” you stuttered as you tried to defog your eyes by rubbing them.
“oh, ma‘ muntxate…” tarsem now said, appearing ever so clearly in your vision.
how did he survive? he was deadly injured, he… he was dead… right?
“how did you… how did you survive? what happened to me?” you asked, finally being able to lay your hand onto his, which still cupped your cheek.
“hm? what do you mean? i… i was fine, y/n. i didn‘t get injured,” he answered.
“i say you… and bea‘nia… shot… injured… you were almost dead… so… bloodied” you managed to stutter as your tears threatened to fall again.
“oh, y/n… you dreamt… you dreamt a bad, bad dream…” he said, while thumb stroked your cheek lightly.
“what… why? why did i dream that?” it seemed so real, but you could feel his hand on your cheek, the warmth radiating off of it, the slight tremble in his hand and the callousess ever so slightly rubbing over your skin, that stemmed from years of heavy training.
tarsem shrugged as he continued speaking, “mo‘at thinks it could come from something you ate, which in result could’ve gave you psychedelic side effects… but i don’t think that‘s what it is.”
“what do you think it is?”
he sighed, “we eat the same things, and i didn’t dream that, so… so i think you could‘ve had a really, really bad nightmare, which resulted in a so-called ‘broken heart’, which is where you could’ve gotten these symptoms from. it must’ve been a really strong ‘heartbreak’.”
you smiled weakly, “of course it was… every distance there is between us, hurts. even if it‘s just a few inches.”
tarsem smirked at your comment, “i don’t want you hurting, do i? should i help you?”
notes: it's shorter than i like, hope y'all still enjoy!
cw: i used the words "career suicide" just so y‘all know.
kiri looked down at her hands, “you didn’t do anything, but… i kept something from you i need to tell you.”
“you know im always there for you kiri, and you can always talk to me about anything.” you replied to her, hoping she would finally tell you what was going on.
“y/n, i…”
“i have feelings for you.”
—————
your eyes widened at her sudden confession, you expected her to say anything, anything but this.
“i feel there is more between us than just friendship and family, i…” kiri started, but stopped herself soon after, as she realized what she has just said to you, who she had considered her sister for so long. “i‘m sorry y/n, i shouldn't have said that…”
“no kiri, it‘s important to stay true to your feelings, and i appreciate that you are so honest with me. i know that you don‘t just… ‘do that’, you know?” you said, hoping it would ease her cries.
you nervously ran your hand through your hair as you reached out for kiri‘s hand to comfort her. “i… i honestly don‘t know what to say.”
she nervously put her hand in yours. you could feel her hands trembling heavily, which is why you gave them a little reassuring squeeze. “just tell me i haven’t made it weird between us. i really appreciate you being a sister to me, and… i…“ she said, gaze still fixed onto the ground.
“breathe kiri, gather your thoughts and speak.” you advised.
“do you…” she took a deep breath before continuing, “do you still accept me, even though i… i like you?“
“of course! whatever happens, you‘ll always be my sister.” you pause before continuing. “but…”
“but what y/n?” she replied.
“kiri, i… i‘m sorry, but… i‘ve got someone already.” you said. you didn’t want her having false hopes in a relationship that would go farther than this, but you also didn’t want to tell her that you already had someone in fear of hurting her.
she finally looked up at you with tear stained cheeks. “can…can i ask who?”
that was definitely not one of the reactions you had prepared for. everything but that. “umm… i… i’m not sure i can say. i don’t think they’d want it out there.”
“y/n you know i wont tell a soul, and i won’t judge you. even if it’s that vonvä’ ao’nung.” she joked, making the both of you momentarily forget the graveness of the situation.
“you promise you won’t tell anyone?”. you knew if she told anyone then you and neteyam would be done for. for sure.
“yes y/n, i do.”
you took a deep breath. “i’m with… shit, i don’t know if i can. shouldn’t i ask him first?”
“you should when telling other people, but i’m your sister. you can tell me anything. even if you’d be with… i don’t know, one of my brothers” she jokingly said and laughed, but her laughter ceased as you didn’t laugh and your face went pale.
“y/n? you alright?” she asked concernedly. and then she realized what your expression meant, it meant that her joke was actually spot on. her eyes widened nas she realized why you couldn't tell her so easily. “who, y/n? now you need to tell me.”
“lo’ak has tsireya, so who is left?” you said, slightly annoyed, leaving kiri to figure out the most easy question in the whole of pandora right now.
she grinned. “and, well, neteyam has ao’nung, so who…” and then it hit her. “oh! shit, sorry i didn’t mean to offend you y/n, i…”
a little smile formed on your face, “don’t apologize kiri, it’s okay.” you stood up and offered her your hand to stand up. she smilingly accepted and when she stood, you pulled her into a big hug, “you guessed right kiri.”
you pulled back as she didn’t embrace your hug fully, “sorry, i know you don’t like hugging, but you can’t flee this time!” and now she finally embraced your hug as much as she could.
as you two ended your hug you looked kiri in the eyes dead serious. “do you remember us talking about… you know?” she at first was confused, but then got what you were trying to imply.
“no, i don’t know…” she smiled at you with her smile she definitely had from her mother. you had seen grace’s smile a few times in the videologs in the lab where kiri visited her and it was really mesmerizing.
“thank you kiri,” words could not express the gratitude you felt towards her in that moment, “thank you for confessing your feelings to me. and for not saying anything. i appreciate that more than you know.”
“you’re welcome y/n.”
“neteyam? can we… can we talk for a minute?” you asked him while he was weaving something at the beach, or at least trying to do so.
his head turned around to you, making the few beads braided into his hair clink, “sure y/n, what’s up?” he asked you with a warm smile on his face.
“i… i’m sorry neteyam, i…” you begun, scared of how he’d react to you telling you had told kiri about you two.
his expression turned to one of worry, “hey, you can tell me anything y/n. please, continue.”
“i… i told kiri… about us. please don’t be mad…” you timidly said, bracing for whatever he would respond to you.
“y/n, i… why did you tell her? you yourself told me you don’t want anybody to know about us, and now you’re doing it anyways?” neteyam said. standing up, his body turning on the soft sand towards you quickly. his voice was drenched with disappointment towards you.
“she won’t tell anybody, she promised me!” you said back to him. “neteyam, please don’t be mad, she’s the only one who knows!”
“that is not the point y/n! the point is, you broke the promise we made! kiri won’t say anything, i know that. but the problem i have is that you betrayed my trust!”
you were a little bit shocked at the fact he wasn’t mad you told kiri. “so, you’re not mad because i told kiri, but because i contradicted myself?”
“yes y/n, that's exactly my point! i want to tell everybody that we’re together, so everyone knows you’re mine!”
“your parents are gonna kill us both neteyam, you know that. i would love to tell them, yes. but i…” your expression softened and turned to one of uncertainty. “i’m scared neteyam.”
he raised an eyebrow. “scared of what?”
“scared of being outcast neteyam! we were too when we first came here! why are you so insensitive towards that now?” when you first came here, he told you just that, he was scared of being outcast, not just by the clan, but also by his family.
he nervously rubbed two fingers over his temples. “i had time to think since then, and i now know that i don’t care what my future is… but i want my future to be one with you.”
“i want that too, but without your family approving, it will make everything 100 times harder!” you agreed with him.
“y/n, we need to tell them. it isn’t right to keep something like this from them. besides, we’re both 18 now, they’ve been nagging me to search for…” he desperately wanted to say ‘mate’, but he knew you too well and that you would react negatively to him calling you his ‘mate’ just now. “... for someone to spend the rest of my life with.”
you sighed. “neteyam, i’m not fond of that idea. but i… it feels like the right thing to do.”
“how’s it going with tsireya?” you asked lo’ak as the both of you sat on the edge of the walkway for the maruis.
his face turned red immediately and he looked down at his feet hanging just a few inches above the water. “umm… how’s it supposed to go?”
you couldn’t help but grin at that response. “what do you mean ‘how’s it supposed to go’? come on! tell me!” you nudged him playfully.
“it’s going great y/n. we’ve been around each other a lot lately and i think we’re ready to tell mom and dad. well, her parents and mine, obviously.” his gaze now shifted towards the moon again and a smile appeared on his face as he thought about tsireya.
and suddenly, an idea came up in your brain. “so, there’s something i wanted to tell you first and then ask you something. so your brother-”
lo’ak cut you off, “yeah, i know y/n. you’re together and want to tell mom and dad. what did you want to ask me?”
you were taken aback by his sudden confession he knew about you and neteyam. “h- how do you know?”
“it’s fucking obvious y/n. honestly, i’m surprised mom and dad haven’t caught onto it yet…” he said.
“is it really that obvious? please tell me it’s not!” you asked while blushing, hoping he would say ‘it’s not that obvious’.
“like i said, it’s really REALLY obvious. so, what did you want to ask me now?” he looked at you now, grinning a bit at your startled expression.
“um, well… i wanted to ask you if we could… ‘confess’ together? i think it will maybe soften the blow a little bit, you know?” you sighed.
“i’ll have to ask tsireya first, but i think she’d be open for it. you know she likes you two a lot and would help you out..” he said and stood up to leave.
“thank you lo’ak. that makes me feel more comfortable.” you sighed, knowing what was to come next was probably the most awkward thing you’ll ever do, but you couldn’t stop it now. and you didn’t want to.
because you did it for him.
“sit down, please. we need to tell you something.” neteyam asked his parents.
“sure, what did you all want to tell us?” jake said, sitting down with neytiri.
“well…” he took a deep breath before continuing. he took your hands in his and said “me and y/n are together.”
“and so are i and tsireya.” lo’ak said.
you were the only one not looking at jake or neytiri. it wasn’t that you were embarrassed or anything, but you were scared. and you didn’t need to look up to feel the disbelief, disappointment and anger jake and neytiri felt, especially for you.
“no, you’re not…” neytiri said.
“yes, we are.” neteyam said, holding your hand even tighter.
neytiri was probably about to lunge at you as jake spoke up. “lo’ak, tsireya,” he said, looking at each of them when saying their names. “i appreciate your openness and i’m happy you two found each other. you two are dismissed.”
lo’ak stood up with tsireya, holding her hand. “thanks dad.”
“save it for another time lo’ak. i’ve got someone else to deal with,” jake said, which made lo’ak leave instantaneously. “you two aren't together neteyam.”
“yes we are dad. we love eacho-”
“don't you realize what this could mean neteyam? you, being together with your sister?” jake exclaimed, he couldn’t believe what his son just said to him.
“she’s not my sister dad!” he responded, his anger growing bigger.
“but everyone thinks she is you skxawng!” neytiri hissed at him.
“you two could cause issues for our family for your siblings, for us, for each other!” jake now towered in front of you two. “look at me y/n.”
thats exactly what you did. you couldn’t bother looking jake or neytiri in the eyes, but he asked for it, so you did.
“a relationship like yours, going from a platonic one to a romantic one can hurt you both emotionally, so much, that you might end up hating each other! do you want that?” jake asked you, his anger growing even more.
“you two are like siblings, so allowing this would be like a career suicide, mainly for you two. you two are young and dumb, so you’re not going to be together,” what jake just said hit you like a dagger in the heart, it shattered into a million pieces, “you know how hard it will be for anyone in our family viewing you two as more than siblings?”
“your love was forbidden as well jake! you, an avatar mated with a na’vi! isn’t this the same situation, if not even worse?” you exclaimed, you slightly red, puffy eyes now looking exclusively at jake.
you’d been fidgeting with the ring on your finger neteyam gave you, and as you were overwhelmed with the whole situation, your clouded senses decided to pull it off your finger and lay it into neteyam’s hand. you freed yourself from his grip and ran away.
despite your expectations he would, jake didn’t shout at you, commanding to ‘sit your ass back down’ or something, you were free to go.
“hey, y/n? you alright?” a soothing voice asked you as you sat on a stone on the shore, far away from the village. when looking up, you saw a teal na’vi standing in front of you. because your eyes were so full of tears, you needed to wipe away the tears first to see who it was.
“tsireya?” you asked.
“yes y/n. i’m sorry for that whole drama that is happening right now, it’s probably very difficult for you and neteyam, right?” she said, sitting down next to you.
it was, more than she could imagine. she had the approval of jake and neytiri while you didn’t. “of course it is.”
“hey, i’m… i’m sorry if i overstepped. i just wanted to tell you, i’m here for you, anytime,” she offered, a warm smile on her face.
“thanks,” you responded dryly.
she frowned, “if you want me to leave, i’ll do.”
“yes, please. i need time alone,” you said.
her warm smile and body language died off as she left without saying a word.
while you were alone, you had thought of many solutions to this situation, should you really leave neteyam? should you continue anyways? or… should you just leave?
“what are you packing for y/n?” a high-pitched voice behind you asked.
you slightly jumped and saw tuk, standing behind you and observing you pack your things, “i need to leave for a bit tuk. but i promise, i’ll be back as soon as i can.”
her eyes teared up, “what? you… you’re leaving? why?”
“don’t cry tuk,” you said, while extending your arms for her to hug you, “i can’t say why. but i’ll be back, and when i am, the first thing i’ll do is hug you… very, very tight. like this.” you said as you hugged her tighter. and as you thought of all the memories you and her had together, you teared up as well. you were leaving, and you didn’t know if you’d come back in a month, two months, a year?
“i’m sorry tuk. i’m so sorry.” you said,as you hugged her even tighter, trying to remember how her little hands felt on your back, hoping that you’d never forget that feeling when you were gone.
“can’t you stay? somehow? please?” she asked as her tears stained your shoulder.
“no tuk, i’m sorry. i need to do this.”
over the next two days you prepared for your journey, you didn’t talk to neteyam, he didn’t talk to you either. you were both scared that the other one would break up, you just didn’t know you both wanted to continue being in a relationship.
tuk was way more affectionate towards you, she was very affectionate towards you anyways, but especially in those two days, which made your family worry a bit, but you swore tuk in to not tell them until you were gone.
it was a few hours before you left, that you decided to talk to tsireya, you couldn’t leave your best friend without any kind of explanation.
“tsireya? can we talk?” you timidly asked her as she was weaving, while sitting on the sand of the shore.
“what is it, y/n?” she responded. you noticed she was colder towards you, no warm smile, no lovely body language.
you sighed, “i’m sorry for being so harsh on you tsireya. i… i just needed time to process everything and… i decided what to do.”
she looked up from her weaving, “thank you, y/n.”, and there it was again. the warm smile, although not as warm as it used to be. “tell me, what did you decide?”
“i’m leaving in a few hours. i can’t carry the burden of hurting neteyam, kiri, you, and my whole family anymore. i’ll return to high camp.” you said, looking down at the sand.
“are you serious y/n? please tell me you’re not.”
“i am serious.”
“y/n i… i know you’re very independent and i can’t stop you but… we need you here. this is your home now. and…” she couldn’t continue her sentence as she started tearing up.
“no, no. don’t cry tsireya. don’t cry. i’ll be back, i just don’t know when, but i will be. i promise.” you really hoped she would understand, but you could understand that she didn’t understand.
you two hugged tightly, in the meanwhile you had started crying too, thinking about leaving this beautiful village and all of your friends and family behind. but you needed to do this.
“you’re not hurting us y/n.” she responded, whispering into your neck while holding you tight.
“yes, i am,” you responded, “i’ve not talked to neteyam at all since we talked with jake and neytiri. he must hate me…”
“stop y/n,” she said, pulling away from the hug and shaking her head, making the beads and shells in her hair clink, “everytime you were near him, his eyes were on you, and they’d never leave. he still loves you and will not stop doing so.”
you had been looking down after she pulled away, but you lifted your head to look into her teal eyes, “really? does he still… look at me?”
tsireya could just roll her eyes, wiping away a tear afterwards, “of course! he looks… no, STARES at you, every single day.”
“okay, but what about kiri? she-” you begun, but tsireya interrupted you.
“i know already, she told me a few days ago. she felt hurt, yes, but she has accepted you have someone else, she isn’t mad at you, y/n.” she explained, making you feel easier about that topic.
but it still bugged you that she was hurt by you, and you couldn’t let that happen again.
“and your parents… well, jake and neytiri, i understand their concerns,” she said, making you raise an eyebrow, “but your love is not just temporary, its forever. eywa made you two fit together perfectly, y/n.”
“i… i dont know what to say tsireya… i… i appreciate you, being here for me and…” you stuttered, “but i can’t change my mind now.”
she sighed, knowing you were set on leaving. it hurt the both of you, seeing each other this hurt, and it was because of you.
“i need to ask a favor of you…” you asked, “i need you to tell neytiri, jake, neteyam and everyone else of my family and who asks why i left. tell them, i’ll be back, i just don’t know when.”
there were her tears again, “okay y/n… i… i will.” you two hugged tightly, “can you tell me when you leave, so i can say goodbye?”
“of course tsireya. i will do that.”
you hugged tsireya, tightly. it was like she never wanted to let you go, to do anything to keep you here. your ikran was ready to go, all of your things were packed.
“i’ll miss you y/n.” she said, and to your surprise, she gave you a little kiss, which made you blush.
“i’ll… i’ll miss you too tsireya.” you said, mounting your ikran. “goodbye,” you said, already starting to tear up again.
tsireya stared into the distance, where your ikran flew, far away, sheading a tear. she couldn’t believe that you did all this because jake and neytiri were so unsupportive towards you and neteyam.
and you weren’t less emotional. you hugged your ikran’s neck,. crying as well as you looked back onto awa’atlu. for a second, you thought you could see tsireya’s teal eyes looking at you, pleading to come back.
but you couldn’t. you had a destination to reach. and that destination was high camp.
synopsis. you and your family finally arrived in awa'atlu and meet the metkayina. you learn their ways quickly and adapt, but it would be too good to be true if everything went well and without a few bumps along the way. additionally, someone needs to confess something to you.
word count: 5.5k
warnings/tags: maybe dark (not directly sibling x sibling but it can be recieved as such), slight angst, contains a TINY mention of alcoholism, one-sided love
music: my spotify playlists, (playlist with more rock and metal; more accessible songs.) sailor song - gigi perez and strangers - ethel cain
the song 'kiss' mentioned here is based on / an ”homage“ to a song of the same name by wavvyboi (spotify, youtube)
na'vi translations: skxawng - moron; uturu - refuge; olo'eyktan - clan leader; oel ngati kameie - i see you; tsahìk: spiritual leader; ikran - mountain banshee; vonvä' - asshole, dickhead; tstew - brave; tsamsiyu - warrior; oe tiyawn nga - i love you;
translations from here <3
notes: i call lo'ak and neteyam "brothers", although they are not related to the reader (y/n). also sorry for basically copying the script of twow for like half of the fic, but i promise in pt.3 there will be less
fic begings under here
in the last part of "the ring":
you watched jake stand in front of tarsem as he slices the olo’eyktan’s chest, symbolically killing jake, which made tarsem the new olo’eyktan of the clan you would be leaving shortly.
as your family left, you turned around to tarsem.
“i’m proud of you, tarsem. until we meet again.” you press all three fingers to the top of your head and sweep it down slightly to the bridge of your nose, before departing from your face downward. “oel ngati kameie, olo’eytkan tarsem. thanks for being by my side and making me the warrior i am today.”
“thank you y/n. until we meet again.” he hugs you, his first trainee, for maybe the last time, before you follow your family to their ikrans. unbeknownst to you, tarsem shed a little tear when you left.
you flew for many hours… so many hours you started getting serious back pain from sitting on your ikran, sometimes with tuk, sometimes not.
“how long do we have to fly? it feels like we’ve been flying for an eternity, dad!” lo’ak asked, with a little hint of whining in his voice.
as you flew out of a cloud, you could see a beautiful seaside village, teal-coloured na’vi sat in round pools of water, which looked like hot springs to you, and some na’vi rode on very long creatures that moved through the water so efficiently and marvelously, you were just staring at them.
as your ikrans flew closer to the ground, you noticed that these na’vi looked different, their eyes were bigger and featured a blue or green color rather than the yellow ones you were used to. their forearms and lower legs had expanded to include a fin-like structure, which you later learned was known as a 'strake', and the tails were broadened to form a paddle shape.
as you landed on the sand, it didn’t take long for your teal-coloured brothers and sisters to surround the blue, foreign na’vi that showed up unannounced.
tuk was awoken from her slumber as you landed, “are we there y/n?” she said, still half asleep.
“yes we are tuk.” you said as you dismounted your ikran and carried her down to the sand.
her eyes widened as she took in the new environment she was witnessing. she eyed up the teal na’vi the same way they did, you found it pathetic from them to stare at you all like you were a completely different species. tuk walked forward curiously as neytiri grabbed her bow from her ikran.
“hey. leave it.” jake said to her. she obliged with a gruff sound, putting the bow back. jake turned to you and your siblings. “on me.”
“tuk?” you said, extending your hand for her to grab onto it.
“be nice” neytiri instructed you as she extended her hand for tuk to grab onto it. tuk looked at you with an expression you interpreted as her asking you ‘can i?’ which you nodded to. neytiri nodded back to you.
“hey” jake said nervously. it had been the first time you’d heard him this nervous in months, if not years.
a murmur went through the crowd of your teal brothers and sisters, as they recognized jake sully, toruk makto and, until recently, olo’eyktan of the omatikaya clan. they eyed all seven of you curiously, especially jake, kiri and lo’ak since they had five fingers and faint signs of eyebrows.
a young, teal na’vi, with a hairstyle the sky people called “man bun” or something like that, and his friend, you assumed, cut through the crowd like a newly sharpened knife through prey when hunting. you, neteyam and lo’ak greeted them with the gesture you do while saying oel ngati kameie, but none of you three said the words.
“easy, just be cool.” jake reminded you three.
“look, what is that?” the shorter of the two teal boys said. “is that supposed to be a tail?”
you whipped your tail in their direction, although doing so slowly, they still took a step back. “woah woah woah!” they laughed.
you turned to see what your brothers were doing, as you saw both of them staring at a girl - you had to admit, was really beautiful - as she dismounted the fast water creature you admired earlier, and came out of the water. you nudged lo’ak while grinning, who then shoved his brother a bit by accident, making neteyam lose balance shortly. and you had to admit to yourself - again - that her dismount from the creature was flawless, it looked like she had practiced it like a thousand times just for this moment.
“what the hell, y/n?” lo’ak muttered before shoving you back and staring at the girl again who now stepped closer to the little crowd that had formed around the seven of you.
neytiri noticed the two of them staring, although neteyam was way more nonchalant about it than lo’ak was, and gave them a gaze that was apparently so intimidating they immediately stopped.
“it’s too small, how are they supposed to swim?” the shorter teal boy said and laughed, but his smile didn’t last very long as the girl lo’ak had stared at like he’d never seen one before stepped in front of them. “do not! rotxo! ao’nung!” she scolded, before turning back to lo’ak who had started staring again, which made you sigh in disappointment.
“hey…” he said timidly, like he had never spoken to a person, let alone a girl before. you really had to keep yourself composed not to burst out in laughter, but you knew better than to laugh at your bother when he was in the middle of courting the girl.
your eyes shot into the sky as you heard something soaring above your heads. you could see it was a sea creature too, but not the same one lo’aks holiday flirt rode when she arrived. as the creature settled in the water, a mighty warrior with many tattoos over his face and chest, which were partially covered by a necklace with something you assumed to be a tooth of some kind of sea predator, dismounted his creature and stepped closer to us.
“olo’eyktan, i see you.” the warrior said to jake as they both greeted each other with the accompanying hand gesture.
“olo’eyktan tonowari.” neytiri greeted the warrior named tonowari, who apparently was the olo’eyktan of that clan, with the same gesture.
the crowd in front of you suddenly parted for someone or something again, you just couldn’t see who or what they were parting for, until a woman with a beautiful shell on her forehead stepped forward. she eyed you all up suspiciously, like you were intruders, unwelcome on her turf.
“i see you, ronal, tsahìk of the metkayina” jake said to the tsahìk, who you just now noticed was slightly pregnant.
neytiri greeted her next. “i see you, ronal.” you followed suit and greeted her too. “i see you, ronal.”
she turned to you and eyed you up suspiciously, especially staring at your face, then looking at jake and then back to you, determining you probably weren’t their biological child before turning back to jake and neytiri.
jake spread his arms wide like an ikran ready for take off. “we seek uturu!”
ronal looked so shocked, if you didn’t listen to the conversation, you probably would’ve thought he just insulted her. “uturu?” she responds, like she’d never heard that word before. she looked at tonowari while jake continued.
“a sanctuary for my family.” jake added with a pleading expression on his face.
ronal now circled the seven of you, grabbing your arm. “their arms are thin…” she observed while you snatched away your arm, caught off guard by her sudden action. you turned around to see what she was up to. your ears fold back as she grabs kiri’s tail. “...their tails…”
her speech was interrupted by kiri snatching her tail back. “ow!”
ronal didn’t care if she had hurt kiri and continued on her speech.”...are weak…” she suddenly grabs kiri’s hands, which were holding her tail until ronal held them in the air to prove a certain point. “...these children… are not even true na’vi!” she exclaimed while lifting up kiri’s hands slightly so that the whole clan could see that kiri had one more finger than them, like a demon. a murmur went through the crowd as she walked over to lo’ak, and also grabbed his hand and yanked it in the air. “they have demon blood!”
she had now almost gotten around to pointing out her dislikes about each one of your family, as jake stepped in and held his hand up. “look. look! i was born as one of the sky people, but now i'm na'vi! some can adapt!”
you grew less interested in the fight between jake, neytiri and ronal, so you started exchanging looks with your brothers, well, at least you tried, neteyam ignored your gaze and lo’ak was lost in his thoughts - probably about the girl that still didn’t have a name.
after a bit, you turned to their argument again as neytiri and ronal hissed at each other. before things could escalate any further, jake stepped in. “i apologize for my mate, she’s-”
neytiri tries to cut jake off, “do not apologize for me!” but he simply kept talking. “...flown a long way and is exhausted.”
“jake!” she protested, but jake shot her a look that told her to step back and she did so. “uturu has been asked…” she muttered.
ronal looked up at tonowari, subtly shaking her head at him. he made a pleading face, which then led her to give him a still subtle, but now more noticeable nod.
tonowari turned to the seven of you again. “my son ao’nung and out daughter tsireya will show your children what to do.”
and the girl lo’ak been eyeing finally had a name… tsireya. and she was the sister of that skxawng who laughed at your tails earlier.
ao’nung was obviously not happy with his fathers decision and tried to protest, but was immediately shut down by him.
as you brought your stuff to your new home, which the metkayina clan called marui, you stared in awe as you take in the beauty of the place. their homes were attached to mangrove tree roots and held up with tension created between them. you laid the stuff you carried down and took in the beauty of your new home, as you heard a thumping sound, which made you flinch and turn around. neytiri had dropped her carpet, but you couldn’t tell why. was it in awe? in exhaustion? in sadness?
you feel a little hand pulling at your arm. “come into the water with us y/n!” tuk asked, giving you her puppy dog eyes, which when she did, you couldn’t deny her anything.
you at first thought you were walking to the beach, but as tuk grabbed you hands tightly and tugeds you to the end of the walkway, jumping into the water as she lets go of your hand. you hesitated at first, but quickly decided to follow her.
the sea was beautiful. everywhere were little fish and other sea creatures who swam curiously around you. tuk gestured you to come swim with her, and you did so. the sea was so vibrant, there were just too many impressions and you couldn’t decide what to stare at first. soon after, the both of you needed to go up for air.
“everything alright tuk?” you asked her, concern etched onto your face
“i just needed air, my breath is really short.” she said, as just a few meters away, neteyam and lo’ak resurfaced from the water to catch some air. the only one you didn't see was kiri, which made you feel uneasy.
“have you seen kiri?” you shout over to your brothers.
“no, we haven’t!” lo’ak shouted back, looking concerned. neteyam also looked concerned, but he didn’t look or respond to you.
“stay up tuk!” you instructed her as you took a deep breath and dove back down under the water. you once again took in the beauty of the ocean, although you weren’t able to really appreciate it fully since you were still frantically searching for kiri. you looked behind big corals and stones as long as your breath lasted, until you had to resurface for air.
“where is she?” neteyam asked, which made your heart jump a bit, as you hadn’t spoken since you sat down in front of the family hut back in high camp, and the both of you didn’t leave that conversation feeling better about yourselves. well, at least you didn’t.
not wanting to fuel your fight with neteyam even more, you decided not to give a sarcastic answer. “i don’t know, i haven't seen her yet!” you prepared to go back underwater, but your brothers didn’t follow suit, still looking concerned. “your skxawng asses are BOTH coming with!”
your brothers took a deep breath and went under as well, although doing so not looking amused. the three of you split up as you searched for your sister. out of the corner of your eye, you could see a familiar blue on the sea ground, but as you turned around you saw it wasn’t kiri, but just a weird sea plant.
you felt the need to go up for air while getting a more aerial view of the sea, and as you did so, you saw kiri, happily swimming around and snuggling, of some sorts, with a sea creature you assumed was about 7-9 meters long.
you took a quick breath as you dove down to her. you tried signaling to her that she should go up for air but she shook her head and signaled you that she was okay, shown by a simple thumbs up.
you rolled your eyes as you swam back up, where your brothers were waiting for you already. “where is she?” lo’ak said. “we can’t find her, did you?” neteyam asked.
“she apparently doesn’t need to breathe underwater” you said jokingly, not knowing how true it actually was.
your brothers looked at you confusedly, then swimming off again. you turned around to tuk, who stayed put in the water. “what do you mean she doesn’t need to breathe?” she asked you.
you smile at her, ”that wasn’t meant to be taken seriously, i just joked about it. i needed to go up like 4 times for air while she didn’t need to go once.” you paused. “i’m heading back to our ma… mairu? marui, yes, marui. you coming?” you asked her, reaching out of her hand.
“i’ll stay for a bit y/n.” she responded.
“alright, see you later tuk! and stay safe, don't swim out too far and all that, if something happens to you, neytiri will kill me.” you said jokingly, before swimming back to shore.
over the next few days, you started to learn the metkayina ways, like how to breathe properly before going into the water or riding an ilu. but you weren’t the only ones to learn something, because you, neteyam and lo’ak taught that skxawng ao’nung and his friends to not mess with your family.
kiri laid in the water, zoning out while looking at the beautiful sand. unbeknownst to her, ao’nung and his friends surrounded her, staring at her like they’d never seen her before and she just decided to appear out of nowhere.
ao’nung and his friends were talking and mumbling outside the water when her head emerged from the water, with a friendly expression on her face. “huh? what’d you say?”
“are you some kind of… freak?” ao’nung asked her, surrounded by his friends, towering over kiri cockily.
kiri was taken aback by their question. “he asked if you’re a freak!” rotxo followed up.
all of this happened in your reach of hearing, which is why you put your guitar down and stood up and watched, ready to step in. as ao’nung grabbed kiris hands and said she wasn’t a real na’vi, lo’ak rushed towards the group, “hey! back off, fishlips!” he exclaimed, prompting you to follow him.
“ooh, another four fingered freak!” ao’nung laughed.
“don’t touch me!” lo’ak commanded, but they didn’t listen, obviously.
“leave us alone!” kiri pleaded, as you joined the group while they taunted lo’ak, calling his tail a “babytail”.
“back off, skxawng!” you said, as you shoved ao’nung away from lo’ak. you felt a rush of air, as netyam passed you, shoving ao’nung a second time.
“you heard what she said. back the fuck off.” neteyam said, inches away from ao’nung at this point.
another metkayina, who stood beside ao’nung spoke up, “aah, big brother comi-” before being cut off by ao’nung.
“back off.” neteyam said to ao’nung, who didn’t seem to give a fuck about what he said. “now.” he added, adding graveness to his voice.
ao’nung apparently seemed to finally get his message, raising his hands and backing off.
“smart choice. and from now on, you respect my sister.” neteyam said. the boy who got cut off by ao’nung earlier exchanged hisses with kiri. “let’s go.”
“bye bye!” the teal boys mocked, smug smiles on their faces.
as you walked away, you could basically feel lo’ak’s desire to just absolutely uppercut the heck out of that vonvä’ ao’nung. “don’t lo’ak. it will just cause more trouble, and remember, jake asked us to do one thing, and that was to behave.” you mutter to him.
as lo’ak stops in his tracks, you grab his arm, making the metkayina boys whistle behind your back, “she thinks we cant take on her freak-ass brother, does she?”
“i’m saving your ass, so shut up.” you said, tightening your grip on lo’aks wrist. nonetheless, he yanked it right out of your grip and walked over to them. in a last ditch effort, you mutter “don’t lo’ak!” to him, but he doesn’t listen. why should he, he is lo’ak after all.
“i know this hand is funny, look, i’m a freak, alien. but it can do something really cool, watch…” he said, as he balled his hand into a fist, “first up ball it up real tight, like this… ‘kay? then-”
“shit!” you exclaimed as lo’ak hit aonung so hard in the jaw, his head snapped to the right side with a force that could’ve broken his damn neck. he fell down on the ground, looking shocked at what lo’ak had just done.
“it’s called a punch, bitch!”
“what was the one thing i asked, one thing?” jake asked the three of you, neteyam and lo’ak.
“stay out of trouble…” one of your brothers said. you didn’t recognize who it was, you were too busy looking at the ground, ashamed of disobeying the only thing jake asked of you.
“stay out of trouble, right!” he repeated.
“it was my fault-” neteyam begun, wanting to take the blame for lo’aks actions, but jake wasn’t having any of it.
“yeah, i don't think so, you gotta stop taking the heat for this knucklehead!” jake interrupted him, clearly not buying the act.
you lifted your head up “jake, ao’nung and his skxa-... his friends were picking on kiri…”
“...called her a freak.” lo’ak added.
jake took a deep breath as he eyed the three of you up and down, seeing your injuries. neteyam and lo’ak were bleeding at the nose and lip, and had bruises all over their bodies. apparently ao’nung had taught his friends morals, since you were the one with the least amount of injuries, almost every bruise you had came from them wildly fighting and being unaware of their surroundings. sometimes, they did hit you on purpose, but that was the meaning of a fight, right?
“go apologize to ao’nung.” jake commanded lo’ak, your eyes widened at his request, even tho it wasn't directed at you. “he’s the chiefs son, d’ya understand? i don’t care how you do it, just go make peace. just go!” and with that, lo’ak left.
jake now spoke to you, “y/n, why didn’t you hold lo’ak back? or neteyam at least? you couldn’t even hold back yourself! i really thought better of you, as my eldest child.”
“i tried holding him back, i held his wrist and told him not to but he just yanked out of my grip and i was basically powerless! now don’t blame me for not trying.” you responded.
jake raised an eyebrow, “and what about neteyam? and why did you join in?” he asked.
you tried to not turn red just now as he mentioned neteyam, “at that point it was already too late jake. and i tried to break it up but just got caught in the fight.” you looked down again to hide your reddening face.
jake again eyed you up, taking in every injury. “at least they have some manners, they didn’t go so hard on you as they did on your brothers.” he then turned to the neteyam. “so what’d the other guys look like?” he asked.
“worse” neteyam replied, while looking up from the ground slightly to meet his fathers gaze.
“thats good.” jake replied, which you were a bit confused about but also understood somewhat.
“a lot worse” neteyam added as he looked up at his father, a tiny, almost unnoticeable smile forming on his face. he was pushing his luck at this point, which made jake send him out. “get outta here.”
jake turned back to you. “im disappointed, y/n. i really though you were wiser than to join in after failing to stop them from punching the olo’eyktan’s son.”
“i’m sorry.” you replied, gaze still left on the ground.
“look at me. look me in the eyes y/n.” jake commanded, and you did so. “they were in the wrong, yes, they shouldn’t have called kiri a freak, but that does not justify punching them. if they do that again, tell your brothers to back the fuck off and get me. understand?”
“understood.”
“get out.”
you exited the marui and saw neteyam, lost in thought, sitting at the edge of the tension-held pathways. you sat beside him, searching for an opportunity to clear the room about the last few weeks’ events. just as you sat down, he stood up again and was going to leave. you were having none of that ‘running away from your problems like a child’ shit and grabbed his wrist.
“neteyam! why the fuck are you ignoring me?” you ask, mostly anger but also hurt paints your words. “you can’t keep running from your problems neteyam! talk to me, i want to help you!”
neteyam sat back down again.”y/n, i really like you, alright? but i just moved to this unknown village with lots of skxawngs that i don’t like and will probably never do, and then i got this-” he lowered his voice so only you could hear him, “relationship with you, which is anything but traditional. i’m scared we’ll get outcast, now more than ever! so i don’t want to be the boy who doesn’t try to court any metkayina girls and hangs out a ton with you, because then they will make up rumors, and-”
“neteyam, i get it. but that doesn’t mean you can just ignore me without saying anything, alright? i understand what your reason is, but if we do this we have to do it together. you are a strong and tstew tsamsiyu, yes, but you don’t have to carry the weight of the whole world on your shoulders... let me help you carry it.”
neteyam looks you in the eyes, the first time, apart from what happened at sea a week or so earlier when you were trying to find kiri, since you all arrived in awa’atlu. “you would?” he asks, not believing you mean this offer seriously.
“yes, i would. for you… oe tiyawn nga.”
“y/n?” tuk had been nervously tossing, stirring and turning on her woven mat all night which made it almost impossible for you to get any sleep. but you weren’t mad at her, she was still a kid and moving to a new place, just like that can be very demanding, especially of a child.
“hm? what is it?” you whispered back to her as she sat up.
“i can’t sleep. can you sing me something? pleeeeeease?” and there her puppy-eyes were again, gazing at you through the darkness of your marui. “and can you play guitar for me?”
you acted like you needed to think about it, although you had already made up your mind, you would be singing for her, tonight. “hmm… okay, ill do it. but we need to go outside, otherwise we’ll wake everyone else up, alright?”
tuk nodded with a big smile on her face, which made you smile in response, because you knew you caused her to smile. you grabbed your guitar and quietly went outside with tuk. “are you cold tuk?” you asked her, wanting her to feel as comfortable as possible.
she shook her head determinedly, leading you to a somewhat remote part of the village where you could sit in the sand, play guitar and sing for her without anybody hearing you.
you sat down and patted the spot next to you where she laid down and rested her head against your thighs. “what do you want me to sing?” you asked tuk.
she thought for a few seconds until she decided to ask me for the song ‘kiss’. “i want to hear ‘kiss’. you played it so beautifully the first time, i want to hear it again.”
you actually needed to think for a second, because you had only played it once or twice, but when you remembered, your eyes lit up with passion. the song reminded you of your love for neteyam, and you sung that song for him, although he didn’t know. it made you think of all the things you had done together, now, the moments where he stared into your eyes, where he showed you how to use a bow and-
“y/n?” you snapped out of your trance when tuk started tugging at your top to get your attention back and to FINALLY start playing guitar for her. “y/nnnnnn?”
“oh, sorry tuk, i… got lost in my thoughts.” you smile at her apologetically while she relaxes her head back onto your thigh and you start playing the song.
the song was so unapologetically beautiful and emotional, while at the same time not making you want to cry, but you could if you wanted to. and the song was repetitive, but in a way that could make the person the song is addressed to never forget what they had just heard, what just had been said to them. it makes the person the song is about the overarching topic that lays perfectly in between every single paragraph, in between every single word, in between every single syllable, in between every single letter.
as you finally finished up the song, you saw tuk’s chest rising and falling slowly, she was definitely asleep. you gently removed tuk from your thigh and picked her up with one hand, while carrying the guitar in the other.
you laid her down on her woven mat in the marui, tucking her in with a blanket. you then sat down your guitar and laid down yourself, quickly drifting off to sleep.
“no jake, i won’t stop doing the things i love, just because you think it’s ‘sky people stuff’!” you exclaimed. jake and neytiri were scolding you after tuk blabbered out you sung her to sleep last night with your guitar.
“y/n, we spoke about this before, and we said no more playing around the hut, and it still applies for the marui!” jake defended himself. he didn’t want you playing guitar and adapting to ‘sky people stuff’.
you laughed in disbelief as you heard him said that. “jake, if i hadn’t done that last night, tuk would’ve gotten almost, if not even no sleep at all! why are you angry at me for helping her sleep?” you couldn’t believe jake’s hypocrisy. he used sky people weapons all the time to kill people, but if you played guitar, its like the end of the world for him. you didn’t speak about it tho, because the last time you did, he explained to you for an hour or two - you don’t even remember - why he should be using the sky people weapons.
“you’re disobeying eywa’s third law actively y/n!” jake said, his anger growing bigger with every word he said.
“but you aren’t when you’re using sky people’s guns?” shit, you didn’t want to say that, and you shouldn’t have. you only realized you had stood up from the ground a few seconds after saying that.
“sit back down y/n!” neytiri hissed at you.
your ears folded back because you were ashamed of yourself for saying that, and because neytiri hissed at you. she rarely did that, but if she did, it was a sign to you to SHUT UP. and that’s exactly what you did, you sat back down without saying anything, looking down on the ground, ears still folded back.
“how often do we have to tell you to stop playing that damn guitar? it is-” jake said, before he was interrupted by someone.
“why do you let her keep it then? it’s like giving an alcoholic a cabinet full of alcohol!” neteyam said.
the three of you looked up at him, surprised to see him here, defending you. “neteyam, don’t.” you look up, now pleadingly staring at him. “this is none of your business.”
neteyam was about to say something when jake stood up, now towering in front of him, blocking your view of him. “get out.” jake said. you’ve never seen him this angry before, and you realized it’s all because you played that stupid guitar. jake and neytiri were mad at you because of it, jake was now angry at neteyam as well because of it, and who knows what would be after this discussion, because of it.
“you know we dont like when you play that thing, and we want… you NEED to stop, you ARE stopping, y/n. even one sound comes out this, and we will burn it at the next campfire.” jake said after he turned back around to you.
your ears perked up as you heard what he had just said, and thats when you’ve had enough. you stood up as your eyes became watery at the thought of the only thing that could keep you sane if you’d be alone being destroyed. “you wouldn’t jake… you wouldn’t dare to.”
“fuck yes i would.” he said, not an ounce of emotion being shown from his expression.
“i need to speak to your father alone y/n. you can leave.” neytiri said. jake looked at her in disbelief, like she just insulted him in the worst way possible. she was still angry, but her anger was now more directed to jake as you exited the marui, beginning to cry.
that neytiri had just called jake ‘your father’ didn’t bother you in the slightest, but it would’ve if you weren’t too busy with wiping tears from your eyes. you picked up a bit of their conversation before being out of reach. “jake, the kid obviously loves this thing! you’re not her drill sergeant! why would you forbid her to-”
a strong hand touched your shoulder, you flinched at the unexpected physical contact. you turned around to see neteyam standing in front of you. “i’m sorry y/n, i didn't mean to embarrass you or anything, i was just… i wanted to help you.”
“thank you neteyam.” you said as you hugged him and all your tears and pent up anger let loose. “i never thought you would stand up for me, especially against your parents. thank you.”
“yes, i would. for you… oe tiyawn nga.”
“i don’t understand why you don’t really miss spider, i mean you two were like yin and yang, you were the missing puzzle piece to each other, you know?” you said to kiri while you were weaving something and she was laying on her woven mat.
“at first i did miss him y/n, but over the last few weeks i just… i don’t know. i guess i just lost touch with him after we left.” kiri said while staring at the ceiling of the marui. she fidgeted with her hands, which she often did in nervous situations.
you noticed her fidgeting with her hands and were curious why she was doing it. “kiri? is everything alright? you’re fidgeting again”
her eyes immediately widened at your request, she sat up and looked you in the eyes. “no… no it’s not.” she said. it was obvious she was near tears. it felt like she had something weighing on her consciousness she needed to get rid off.
“is it because of spider?” you asked, you couldn’t explain it to yourself otherwise than that she was really missing him after all.
“no y/n…” she said, a tear running down her face. you reached out to wipe it from her face, but she turned her face away. you dropped your hand back to your body as she continued. “it’s because of you y/n…”
the feeling of support you wanted to give to kiri almost immediately vanished and turned into sorrow and a feeling of unease entered your stomach as it turned. “m- me? what did i do?”
you asked, but she didn't answer. “kiri, talk to me, what did i do?”
kiri looked down at her hands, “you didn’t do anything, but… i kept something from you i need to tell you.”
“you know im always there for you kiri, and you can always talk to me about anything.” you replied to her, hoping she would finally tell you what was going on.
synopsis. you have lived with the sullys for many years, but you start to feel that with neteyam, there are more feelings involved than just love on a sibling to sibling level.
warnings: maybe dark (not directly sibling x sibling but it can be recieved as such), slight angst
music: my spotify playlists (playlist with more rock and metal; more accessible songs.), strangers - ethel cain
you wake up from the same dream you always had when you were stressed out, drenched in sweat, heavily breathing. you look around the hut, to see everbody asleep. jake and neytiri were sleeping soundly, just like tuk, kiri and lo‘ak were. neteyam stirred a little in his sleep when you woke up, but didnt wake up himself. you quickly laid back down, staring at the ceiling, recalling what you had just seen in your dream.
you had seen your mother, being held at gunpoint by a rda soldier while you were crying. even tho you didnt understand what happened when you were just a year old, this memory has engraved itself into your consciousness and reappears from time to time, ripping open the hole in your heart left by your mother even further.
every time you closed your eyes, you saw the horrible scene over and over again, you being dragged away from your mother, and hearing gunshots shortly after.
at this point, you knew you probably werent going to be able to sleep tonight, which is why you decided to head outside to catch some fresh air.
you slowly stood up from your resting place, making sure not to step onto anything or anyone. you didn't want to wake anyone up since tomorrow jake had planned an ambush onto a rda train. jake told you to stay with mo‘at to help treat the wounded soldiers, and you weren’t exactly happy with that, you would've loved joining them, even just as a spotter, like your brothers.
„brothers“… you felt silly thinking of neteyam and lo‘ak as brothers, as you sat down outside, since you weren't even blood related, and it had always been a point of discussion in the family, especially from neytiri.
she always pleaded with you to call neteyam and lo‘ak your brothers, like you called kiri and tuk your sisters, but kiri and tuk were different… you didnt know why, but it just felt „right“ to call them your sisters. especially tuk.
tuk really loved you, her biggest sister, who would sing songs and play guitar for her, who would explain her the whole of pandora and who sung her to sleep if she had a nightmare.
kiri was so loving towards you, she would always cheer you up when you were sad, which made you feel kida guilty, since you felt it was your duty as her big sister to do the same for her, but when kiri was sad, she isolated herself. not even you or tuk could get through to her.
as you exited your thoughts and admired the pandoran nature, the sheer beauty of the floating hallelujah mountains and the peace there was when the clan was asleep, you felt a hand on your shoulder.
your body tensed slightly as you snapped your head around to see neteyam kneeling behind you.
„holy shit! you scared me!“ you whisper, while trying to calm down your breath, „why are you not asleep? you know the ambush is tomorrow, right? you need to be well rested as a spotter.“
„sorry y/n, i didn't mean to.“, he answers, gazing in the same direction as you are, „i heard you leaving and wondered what you were up to… you’re with mo‘at, treating the soldiers, right? you need to be well rested as well, you know.“
„i know, but its just… my mother keeps appearing in my dreams and…“, you sigh heavily.
neteyam lays a hand on your thigh, making your head turn towards him, your eyes widen and your cheeks flush a slight red.
„don't overthink it, it's probably nothing.“, he pauses for a bit, then looks in your face, seeing your slightly red cheeks, „you‘re cute when you blush…“
your cheeks turn even redder, „you think so?“
„i do, yes.“, he answers. an awkward silence ensued for a few seconds, „i wanted to give you something y/n.“
„oh…“ your blush that had faded a bit instantly came back, „what is it?“ you ask, while neteyam shows you his closed fist.
„open it, y/n.“, he says, anticipation spreading across his whole face.
you lay one hand under his and use your other hand to open his fist. as you grab the thing from his hand, you realize its a wooden ring, „wow… it's really beautiful.“, you say, a big smile spreading across your face, „you made this yourself?“
„for the most part…“, he says while nervously running his hand through his hair, „kiri helped me figure out what i could make for you.“
you take it in between your thumb and index finger and examine it carefully, „wow… these designs are so pretty.“, you admire the beauty of it some more until neteyams voice pulls you out of your trance.
„put it on, y/n.“, he says, eyes full of affection.
you put it on and stare at the ring, how it was perfectly fitting your style. „wow neteyam… its really pretty, i… i don't know how to thank you.“, the smile on your face widens even more.
neteyam now looks away shyly, “i… hope my little gift will make it a little less… weird what i wanted to tell you.“
you take his hand that rested on your thigh in both of yours, “you can tell me everything, you know that.“ you smile at neteyam as he seems to lose himself so much in your smile that he doesnt talk for a few seconds.
“neteyam?“, you snap him out of his trance, „what did you want to tell me?“
“i… i really like you… more than just friends… i… i have feelings for you, y/n.“, his face turns red like you have only seen these things the humans called „tomatoes“.
your eyes widen and shock, but also relief washes over you, „i… i‘m…“ you stutter, completely taken aback by his sudden honesty.
„talk to me y/n, please.“, he says, looking concerned, like he is bracing for some kind of impact.
„I… I feel the same way neteyam… i…“, you smile while tearing up from happiness, “but it… it feels wrong, somehow.”, you say, still smiling but uncertain about the outcome of this whole thing.
“what do you mean ‘it feels wrong’?”, a few seconds of silence ensue. he frowns and speaks again, “is it because you see us, me and my family as your family?”
“everybody here thinks of us as siblings neteyam.”, you say, with a puzzled expression, wiping away your happy tears, “and besides, neytiri and jake would be furious. they would never accept us.”
neteyams heart skipped a beat as you said ‘us’, referring to the both of you. he raised his voice a bit, “but i dont care what anybody else thinks! i love you and-” he stops in his tracks as you give him a glare to speak more quietly.
“do you want jake and neytiri kicking your ass because of this before it has even begun?” you hiss at him, although the hiss comes out of your mouth half-heartedly.
neteyams ears snap back as you hiss at him, “geez, sorry…” he says, still with a slight smile on his face as he understands you didnt hiss at him because you were truly angry.
“neteyam?”
his ears perk up again, “yes?”
“if we… get together, we can't let anybody know. otherwise it will cause problems for the both of us. we will both be brand marked for life and it will destroy opportunities, and-” he interrupts you.
“as long as i’m with you, that doesn't matter to me.” the both of you blush, and he takes your hand in his, squeezing it gently. “we wont tell anybody… deal?”
“deal.”
the next day, before jake, neytiri, neteyam and lo’ak leave for the ambush
“neteyam, lo’ak! whatever you do, you do not land on the ground! you are spotters, your place to be is the sky, understand?” jake says with a stern expression on his face.
“yes sir…” neteyam and lo’ak answer, obviously not amused with their father not letting them participate in the ambush on the ground.
neteyam comes up to you and hugs you before they need to leave, “bye y/n.”
“take care neteyam.” you say, then you walk to jake, neytiri and lo’ak also wishing them luck.
“is your comms turned on y/n?” jake says, checking out your mic and earbuds which they use to communicate over.
“yes, for the 5th time today… why do i need to wear one anyways? im not in the battle with you all, even though you know how well tarsem trains me.” you roll your eyes annoyedly.
“because if we need urgent care at the scene, you’ll fly over to us…” he looks away shortly before turning back to you, “for the fifth time today”, he says, imitating your earlier mockery. “Your grandmother needs to stay here and kiri and tuk are helping her out, you are one of the only people i trust to take care of wounded warriors in the middle of the ambush.”
“alright, alright, i get it…” you say, still annoyed.
jake, neytiri, lo’ak and neteyam fly away on their ikran towards the incoming train. you feel worried deep inside, but decide to keep your outside emitting strong and tough energy.
an hour or so later, you were treating wounded warriors when you heard jakes voice, definitely angry at both of his sons. you decided to stay with the soldiers, until you hear that neteyam was wounded. that's when you decide to check out what is going on.
“go get yourself patched up” you can hear jake say as he scolds lo’ak for being reckless.
you get neteyam to the other wounded warriors, preparing him for some treatment, “what happened neteyam?” you say as you grab some materials.
“a gunship from the sky people shot at us with… with explosive munition i think… me and lo’ak were down on the ground and then-” you cut him off as your big-sister-instincts kick in.
“you went down there? you know how badly that could’ve ended? you… you could be dead neteyam”, you say, voice filled with emotion. as you were about to continue your instinct-driven rant, neteyam silenced you.
“you don't need to tell me the same thing dad told me, y/n.”, he tries to get up again, but you stop him.
“you’re staying neteyam! you're hurt and your ass won’t leave until i treated the wound.” you say with dreading in your voice. “i’m sorry i lashed out at you, but you can’t get yourself into danger when jake explicitly told you not to.” silence ensues for a few seconds. “i’m sorry, but i just want you to be safe, and… i feel responsible.. kinda… i dont even know why and… are you even listening?”
he was, in fact, not listening to you.
your eyebrows furrow as you realize he wont listen to anything you’ll say. “kiri can take over from here if you dont want to talk neteyam.”
he still stayed silent.
“alright… i’ll get kiri then.”,you say as you leave him to get kiri. he wants to just stand up and leave, but since you’re basically his sister, you turn around to make sure he stays put. “neteyam, sit your ass back down!”, you command. he obliges while mumbling something you couldn’t quite make out.
a few days later, you sit in the family hut, waiting for the return of lo’ak, kiri, spider and tuk. they had gone out to the forests to explore. they wanted you to come along, but you were lost in your thoughts about what happened while you were aiding neteyam. jake, neytiri and neteyam suddenly ran around the hut nervously, you notice a certain tension lingering in the air. jake, neytiri and neteyam are seemingly in a hurry. you wonder what they’re up to, so you decide to ask them.
“jake?” you approach jake with a curious expression. “why are you all so tense right now?”
“your brother lo’ak brought tuk, kiri and spider to the abandoned barracks. quaritch has them hostage.” jake says, restlessness and worry written his face.
you gasp at the thought of your best friends being held hostage by this ‘quaritch’ guy jake had often talked about, but you had no idea who he was or what he looked like. “i'll grab my bow and come with you!”
jake doesnt even look at you as he denies your request. “no y/n. you’re staying here. it is way too dangerous having so many of us around there.”, he says with a tone in his voice that makes it unmistakeable for you that there was absolutely no room for discussion.
“alright… i’ll stay” you say, feeling sad and left out, while simultaneously understanding the reasoning behind his decision.
you stay back in the hallelujah mountains as jake, neytiri and neteyam fly off towards the vast pandoran jungles. you couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness as everyone left but you.
“they had their knifes at our children’s throats!” jake energetically says to neytiri.
“my father gave me this bow, as he was dying… to protect my peo-” you can hear her say before you snap out of your trance-like state when a little finger pokes at your thigh. as you look down, you see tuk, looking up to you.
“hey tuk, whats the matter?” you ask smiling, kneeling down to be on her eye level.
“what are they arguing about?” she asks with her sweet childish voice.
“i don’t know, but if it concerns us, they will let us know alright? let’s give them some space to work things out.”. you extend your arms, signaling her to let you carry her. she immediately hugs you and you pick her up, walking to where neteyam, lo’ak and kiri were sitting.
“what do you think they’re talking about?” lo’ak asks,
“don't be so nosy all the time lo’ak. if its about us, they’ll tell us sooner or later” kiri scolded her brother.
“exactly what i was saying to tuk just now.” you sit down, gently setting her back on the ground.
you noticed neteyam was just looking down at the ground, lost in his own thoughts. “neteyam? everything fine?”
he glances up at you for a second, before responding with a short and gruff “yeah.”. he looked on the ground again, not willing to talk to you about what had happened in the forest.
you sigh heavily, “what is it with you over the last few days? why are you ignoring me neteyam? what did i do to you? is it because of what happened while i fixed you up?”
he gives no response.
“i already said im sorry, alright!” you say, a hint of desperation in your voice. you know you would‘ve said much more if lo‘ak, kiri and tuk weren’t sitting a few meters beside you.
“y/n, your mother almost got-” he starts but gets interrupted by you:
“she isn't my mother!“ you hiss, your ears laying back flat.
“your siblings almost got killed and you…” he responded angrily before taking a break. “i need time to think over stuff and don't have time to ‘talk about my feelings’ y/n.”
“sorry for asking skxawng…” you spit back.
no answer from neteyam again.
neytiri and jake exit their hut, walking towards the six of you. the obvious tension in the air could be felt from miles away.
jake takes a deep breath and sits with us all, while neytiri is nervously pacing around. „your mother and i have decided to leave the hallelujah mountains, in light of the fact that you three…“ he pauses to look at lo‘ak and kiri with a stern expression which softens as he looks at tuk. „were held hostage by quaritch, which means he is here for me. i cant endanger my family like that, which is why we‘re going to be seeking uturu from another clan.“
tuk, who had clinged to your knee, started crying. you picked her up to comfort her, but neytiri gave you her all-telling-‘give me my kid back’-stare, so you handed her tuk carefully. but you yourself hadn’t been affected less by what jake just told you.
first your eyes widened and searched for jake’s, asking him is this true? with your tear-filled eyes. he just nodded at you, making you let your tears loose.
you were crying, somehow, but it didn't feel like the usual crying, it felt… different somehow. images of your friends, of the jungle you’ll be leaving behind, of everything you had known at this point.
you felt a hand soothingly rubbing your back. you looked up to see kiri, heavily crying herself, trying to comfort you. you stood up and just hugged her deeply. you could feel her heartbeat going faster, yours following suit.
but not everybody was this emotional as you, kiri, tuk and neytiri were. as you pulled away from kiri’s hug and looked around, you took in the boys’ emotions. jake’s expression stern and serious, as always; lo’ak seemed… disappointed, somehow. and as you looked at neteyam, you felt the need to hug him, but resented yourself for thinking that at the same time. he was obviously trying to keep up the facade of the strong, fearless warrior, but it was visibly cracking at that moment. you could tell.
and feel.
it was like you had made tsaheylu with him and could feel what he feels, but you obviously hadn’t.
you watched jake stand in front of tarsem as he slices the olo’eyktan’s chest, symbolically killing jake, which made tarsem the new olo’eyktan of the clan you would be leaving shortly.
as your family left, you turned around to tarsem.
“i’m proud of you, tarsem. until we meet again.” you press all three fingers to the top of your head, sweeping them down slightly to the bridge of your nose, before departing from your face downward. “oel ngati kameie, olo’eytkan tarsem. thanks for being by my side and making me the warrior i am today.”
“thank you y/n. until we meet again.” he hugs you, his first trainee, for maybe the last time, before you follow your family to their ikrans. unbeknownst to you, tarsem shed a little tear when you left.